GIRLS HAVE LAME EXCUSES

[liquidstatik]

ME AND ANDREA WENT OUT FOR LIKE A LONG TIME AND SHE JUST CALLED ME AND IT WENT LIKE THIS >:

me - hey
andrea - hey
andrea - hold on
**long pause**
tori - hey this is tori
me - hey
tori - andre said she's real confused and she doesnt want a boyfriend
me - okie dokie
tori - she said shes a bitch
me - hahehahaha okiedokie
tori - ill tell her to call you back if she wants to
me - k
**hang up**


SHE MUST HAVE REALLY TURNED LESBO OR SOMETHING >:

[da blob]

she changed her mind when she found out you have a small dick.

[ThisIsWitty]

It's because you must use 'okie dokie'.

[Terra]

Well, obviously Andrea wanted Toni to be her new bitch instead of you.

[liquidstatik]

THATS WHAT IM THINKIN >:

[DeadKennedys]

I think having a friend break up for you went out of style around 7th grade..

[Seven Force]

Awwwwwww.... :lol

[camacazio]

I'd be real pissed of someone broke up with me like that. It doesn't change the fact that I know where she lives.

[Anonymous]

I think you should have screamed in agony loud enough to temporarily deafen Tori, but at least loud enough that Andre could hear. I'm sure that'd make a mark on her life. ;>

[Dole]

dumped by proxy. Classy!

[AChimp]

You can join my He-man Woman Haters Club, liquid. :(

[Seven Force]

Yeah, and you can both hug and cry together. :)
lol :blowme

[Supafly345]

Your girlfriend sure is a cunt. You should tell her that you agree and that you aren't really ready for a relationship either, and then get a different girlfriend later that week. Make sure to bump into her a lot and refer to the new girl only as "my girlfriend," and then insist that you stay good friends with "Andrea." I don't know really what this accomplishes, but I garauntee it'll make you feel better.

[Terra]

Oh Jesus Christ.

Instead of dwelling on it and cooking up a plot, why doncha just MOVE ON?!

Get into a relationship because you fucking WANT a relationship not because your going to use the next girl as a counter measure against the LAST one. Shit, you won't ever have a meaningful relationship with a girl and will end up growing calluses on your hand from all the romantic interludes you have in the bathroom or between the fucking sheets all by your lonesome (but then again it just MIGHT be more meaningful).

Reprints of this can be obtained through the Library of Congress.

Seriously, good luck. :)

[kellychaos]

Apathy is the sweetest revenge.

[Perndog]

I'm with kelly on this one. No better way to turn around a painful breakup after a serious relationship than to tell the girl you don't even care. :)

On a related note, my girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. :(

[AChimp]

You mean the shallow summer fling one?

[Perndog]

Remind me why you're qualified to discuss this.

Then come back when you're 30 years old after you've been with your first girlfriend for a few months and we'll talk about it from the same level.

[da blob]

On a related note, my girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. :(

so what was her "lame excuse" ? teehee.

[Terra]

Yeah hopefully she didn't use some bitch named Toni to break up with you.

But on a serious note, I'm sorry about that. It's fucked up when it happens. Even when you see it coming.

[AChimp]

Remind me why you're qualified to discuss this.

Then come back when you're 30 years old after you've been with your first girlfriend for a few months and we'll talk about it from the same level.
Oh, touche! I feel another comic coming on.

If this was just a summer fling, why do you feel bad about it? Oh, I know... you thought you were special because you got to bang her. Told you... shallow! :blah

[Terra]

And speaking of banging....

[Perndog]

She didn't have a lame excuse.

Chimp, that wasn't a good enough retort for me to address it. Answer me first, then shut up.

[AChimp]

:lol

[Dixie]

you know being someone for a few months isn't that long. try being with someone for 5 years before you cry your eyes out over a late teen/early 20s chick that doesn't even know what she wants. relationships don't last when you're that young. get over it.
:edit:
i apologize for the bitchiness of this post but it's not my fault i was under the influence of achimp's powerful jedi mind trick.

[kellychaos]

I'm with kelly on this one. No better way to turn around a painful breakup after a serious relationship than to tell the girl you don't even care. :)

Pulling it off convincingly is the hard part. :(

[Anonymous]

You mean the shallow summer fling one?
:lol

[kellychaos]

Fling ... like a booger.

[Sacks]

Yeah hopefully she didn't use some bitch named Toni to break up with you.

But on a serious note, I'm sorry about that. It's fucked up when it happens. Even when you see it coming.

IT'S TORI! TORI! AGGHH! >:

[ziggytrix]

so did she ever call back?

[The Retro Kat]

Here's the way I figure it. In your high school/jr high/ college years don't commit to a serious relationship. It's a fucking big waste. Just have fun and fool around with as many broads as you can, cause your only young once and women get drunk for long periods of time at that age...

[Perndog]

I want to hear Mr. Chimp's wise, experienced response to that advice.

[AChimp]

I think it's a ONE WAY TRIP TO SYPHILLIS. >:

[kellychaos]

Non-refundable ticket to Syphillisville. :lol

[Captain Goodtimes]

Just south of Syphillidelphia

[liquidstatik]

so did she ever call back?

No. :(

[The Retro Kat]

WRAP IT UP, BITCHES