FUNNIEST POST YET!!

[Lotida]

Terra Wrote:

Unfortunately Stark any comment from a vet doesn't require any explanation. One is a "vet" if they are from the old boards and everybody else is a noob and noobs come here to mock and defend themselves as best they can. Weak noobs whither away and leave and the obnoxious noobs stick around and create fodder for the vets to feed off of. Once in a while a noob bounces a good zinger off a vet thereby making his/her fall from grace all the sweeter in the eyes of the other noobs and this spooks the vet cattle somewhat. They get jumpy and rattled for a bit. If a noob gets zinged constantly, they develop a callus and continue to post. After all, it IS a mockery forum and you, I and other noobs are the food. But WE are the reason the vets are here so take that as a small consolation when your ass is getting shot off by people around here.

Some noobs are completely ignorant, giving the rest of us noobs that much more work to do in order to take up the slack. These noobs must die, either at their own hands or at the hands of the other noobs for they are so cancerous that even the vets cannot touch them and the other outlying noobs must eat them. Try not to fall into this category or I'll, upper echelon noob that I am (for you see, even WE have rank and file order among us) make a banquet out of you.

You seem fine however. Don't ask questions, be watchful and learn from the banter of the other posts and you'll do fine. Oh, TRY not to start any threads if your new. This is your first mistake but your still okay, I got your back. Stay clear of emoticons as those pesky vets like to use them. This is their subterfuge you see. They will use emoticons to distract you while they are slicing off your dick and feeding it to the other vets.

While your cavorting around the forum, please check out my titty thread and also weigh in on the penis thread in the Loveline forum. This will get you bigass bonus points in the long run. All the smart people go there.

Welcome and keep your eyes open, you miserable shit!

:conspiracy

[executioneer]

yeah hahah thats so funny

[Matt Harty]

i just pissed my pants

[Mad Melvin]

I did more than that.

[sadie]

like what?

[Mad Melvin]

I sneezed.

[Schimid]

:lol

[Terra]

Yeah I worked hard on that. I feel *I* need to write a noob advice column so that the other little shits and dingleberries that run down the leg of the registration log and spew out onto I-Mock don't piss on all our (upper echelon noobs, that is) hard work.

As God is my witness, I'll be wearing the next noob's balls for earrings.[/b]

[Esuohlim]

Shut up, fucker.

[kellychaos]

I often cavort.

[Schimid]

When did we start assigning noobs into tiers?

Oh, and Tara's an idiot. I hope your tits break you in half.

[Schimid]

Or maybe they'll sag all at once and slam your face against a sidewalk.

[Schimid]

And maybe the sidewalk will still be wet and your face will get stuck in and no one will care enough to save you and you'll stay there bent over forever and little old men will come by and wrap your labia around your thighs and climax on your decaying corpse.

[Terra]

Wow. A triple play!

What happened? Couldn't get ALL the ideas out in one post? You had to triple up?

Nimrod.

[Esuohlim]

Zip the lip, cunt.

[Jixby Phillips]

haha! well played terra, way to mock schimids ability to post on an internet message board properly :lol

also you fucking stole a joke from CITY SLICKERS TWO

you are so worthless

[HickMan]

ROFLOL olol

[Jixby Phillips]

THE LEGEND OF CURLY'S GOLD

I am an expert on that movie I even wrote a paper on it for school.

[Terra]

Guess I'll have to rent that movie, I hadn't seen it.

Writing a paper on a movie? Good work Jix. I'll bet your parents are proud of you. Is it framed on the wall? Is there a blue ribbon attached to it? No red pencil marks in the margins for incorrect spelling? Lack of sentence structure? It wasn't wordy and had lack of cognant thought? I didn't think so, stud.

Your the MAN OF THE HOUR you fucking gasbag.

Now go have a beer and don't forget to blow your buddies while your at it. Maybe you can write a paper on that too and maybe teach Schimid how to post. :lol

[Jixby Phillips]

i dont drink

[Terra]

plz write a paper on it.

k??

[FS]

Seriously Terra are you ever *not* attacking a guy's dick size, sexual preference or ability to fuck?

Dyke.

[Terra]

Seriously? I only counterattack those that attack me first. And as the normal reference to me is "cunt," "bitch" and other negative female gender labels, I come back with the same in the male tense. What is hilarious to me more so is that these are the guys that are not used to being zinged by a female.

However, since some of the posters have no retentive abilities beyond their first three posts on any given day, I don't expect everybody to understand that. But then, it highly amuses me to see that many male posters (and some not so male) pick up on the more genitalia specific posts of mine and run with those while ignoring the non genitally specific posts.

Very soon I expect to hear from various members of the support group of the males I've zinged in the past. They will be the usual posse of posters that I've hit in the past as a defense and whom have never let it go. This makes it all the more fun to employ the "one shot, one kill" tactic rather than use the "splatter gun" approach that is commonly employed here.

Dickhead.

:lol

[sadie]

i believe the present perfect tense of "zing" would have to be "zung."

[Terra]

I-Spell corrected it to "zinged." :(

So I let it ride.

[kellychaos]

I am SO going to start posting more penis and/or homosexual jokes. They are very effective.

[thebiggameover]

"splatter gun"

its shotgun...
>:

[Anonymous]

What is hilarious to me more so is that these are the guys that are not used to being zinged by a female.
Yeah it's a blue fucking moon when some uppity cunt takes a shot at someone over the internet.

If it makes you feel any less saucy, though, of all the people on this forum that I wish death upon, you're probably close to the last of the list. But only because you're comparatively less stupid.

[Lotida]

Can I be first? :)

[Esuohlim]

Are you saying you want to die, or was that just a poorly thought out comeback?

[Lotida]

I didn't say I wanted to die fuckhead! I just want to be the first on the list of people that Chojin would like to see dead!

Do you understand now dickweed? If you can't keep up.......move along!! >:

[Terra]

Damn I love you Lotida. :) I just saw your avatar. You got some moxy, I have to hand it to you!

:lol

[Esuohlim]

blah blah blah...

You don't want to die, but you want to be first on the list of people to have death wished upon them?

Seriously, Lotida. What the fuck are you trying to say here?

[Lotida]

Seriously, Lotida. What the fuck are you trying to say here?

Now I've changed my mind and just want you to die!

Serioulsy, do you understand what the fuck I am trying to say now Milhouse? Can I spell it our clearer than that for you? Should I post graphics? :rolleyes

[racialslur]

Wait, how many arguments are going on now?

[Esuohlim]

Thank you for changing your mind, since that initial "Can I be first?" comment made you look soooo stupid haha

[Lotida]

Thank you for changing your mind, since that initial "Can I be first?" comment made you look soooo stupid haha

Thank you for being so worried about me! I appreciate it....I really do!! :)

[Esuohlim]

Haha no wait I've changed my mind!!

[sadie]

you two oughtta get married already. :O

[Anonymous]

Jesus fucking Christ, all you fucktards suck tumor infested donkey balls! :lol

Glad to see my TWIN BITCHES OF DECIMATION, Lotida and Terra were carrying out my work, while I was gone. :)

Now then...

Esuohlim: WoW! Those are some great some come backs fucktard! "Zip the Lip!" Wow what a great Morton Downyism from the 80s! And boy those old Seinfield script really come in handy too don't they? Hey fucktard post some more images that attempt to be funny, but actually aren't! WE ALL HAVEN'T GOT ENOUGH OF THAT YET FUCKTARD! :lol

racialslur: You're new I guess, so I haven't insulted you yet, so here's your "fucktard". Enjoy it. My attention is the best thing you've gotten in your whole pathetic teabagging existence bitchboy! :lol

kellychaos: Fucktard, you don't need to post any homosexual jokes, you're already a living example of one, you fucking bukkake cum bucket! :lol

sadie: Go shove your fucking brat up your fat ass you ugly bitch, nobody gives a shit! :lol

Hickman: When you're done fucking your dog in your "Furry" costume, go fucking do society a favor and fucking slit your goddamn wrists fucktard! :lol

Jixby: Go fucking suck Mr. Adventure's herpes infested pus dick, you fucking felching fucktard! :lol

thebiggameover: Just because your uncle buttfucked you until your asshole was all bloody and 8 inches wide, does NOT make it okay to continue the cycle. Shut the fuck up already, you fucking child molesting fucktard. :lol

And that's how its fucking done, fucktards! :lol

EVIL EMPIRE ENTERPRISES
:lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol

[Jixby Phillips]

hey

[MetalMilitia]

Consider yourselves mocked.

[Terra]

Lo, as they were handed their asses in triplicate, they boarded the short bus to the long ride home. To the Batcave! This is where the injured Vets go to lick their wounds, squat on the ground and reconnoiter their next assault by drawing figures in the dirt with the use of their new found tools. Sticks!

Grumbling and muttering, they grunt out the code of the next attack.

Of course some don't quite get the hang of this language and sit in the corner, playing with rocks while they wait for somebody to give them direction.

:lol

[Matt Harty]

Now Terra likes saying "Short Bus"

[Terra]

Hark!

One stray idiot missed the bus! Oh Lord what shall he do??? He might not get back in time for his social life!

[Matt Harty]

Your inner Kellychaos is showing.

[sadie]

oh, man, i didn't get a "fucktard." :(

[Anonymous]

Matt: Hey fucktard, how about you tell us about your "fantastic social life" again! And how its just SO interesting that you feel the need to impress people on the internet about it! No? You know why? BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE A FUCKING SOCIAL LIFE FUCKTARD! :lol

Metal Militia: Hey Goatse fanboy, when you're done jerking off to tubgirl, I want to inform you that you can consider yourself mocked fucktard. :lol

sadie: Fucktardette. Sorry, I get caught up in the other insults sometimes. :)


:lol

[Esuohlim]

Fuck this shit. Mad Max ruins everything.

[Esuohlim]

I've changed my mind.

[Anonymous]

Hey, guys! This thread still absorbed in pretentious stupidity?

[kellychaos]

Milhouse is pulling Lotida's pigtails again. Just check yes or no, stupit.

[Lotida]

Hark!

One stray idiot missed the bus! Oh Lord what shall he do??? He might not get back in time for his social life!

Even the idiots on the short bus don't want to ride with that fucking hobbit faced freak!!

Thank God he's got such a fantastic social life!

[Lotida]

Hey, guys! This thread still absorbed in pretentious stupidity?

Well......yea! :)