thordog
Feb 25th, 2007, 08:35 PM
A pizza delivery simulator sounds mundane. Avoid the Noid, however, is simply bad. It is the player's duty to deliver a freshly baked Italian treat to some guy presumably in his office. But here's the twist: there's a rabbit-like creature called the "Noid" hell-bent on preventing the tasty goods from reaching their buyer.<BR><BR>What?<BR><BR>You have to climb loads of stupid floors in a stupid building, zig-zagging left (up) right (up) and so on. Then there's something to do with stupid doors and stupid keys which I never could properly figure out. Sometimes the floor beneath you is "fake" and you just fall through and have to start again while all the time, the star of the game - the "Noid" - is conducting a random rampage and must be avoided. Somehow. I think there was a 'jump' button somewhere but I didn't really care.<BR><BR>It's atrocious. The graphics are four-colour badness (and I don't mean the good, retro kind of badness), gameplay consists of "Walk left. Jump. Get key. Walk right. Jump. Open door. Get hit by that stupid Noid thing. Repeat."<BR><BR>Avoid the Noid is THE classic bad game. It is to gaming as Bros was to music.<BR><BR>A little note to fans of Avoid the Noid who may be offended: You don't exist. Stop complaining.