Why I DONT get laid

[DonntCY]

A woman who I was talking to for the first time aksed me lately, "So which caste and religion do you belong to?"
"None. I don't believe in that."
"That's okie, still, what's your last name?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"WQhy don't you want to tell me?"
"Coz then you will stereotype me. Put me in a category, label me. May be even expect me to behave like that stereotype image which you have in your head. And that will be away from The Truth."
"I promise I won't."
"Okie then, you take a guess on what my caste and religion is."
"You look like a Chrisstian or a South Indian."
"See, you are already typecasting me. Putting me in a category based on my appearance. Next thing I know you will ask me which parish I go to. Or may be expect me to know the recipe of rassam."
"Cut the crap and tell me what you belong to?"
"OK! I belong to the Consciousness. To The All. To the Ever Prevailing. The Stuff. Can you handle THAT?"
Silence.
Woman screaming: Arrrgghhhhhhhhhhhh.
Man nopting: Not vetting laid tonight.
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i-mockery.com <a href="http://varkuta.info">vorkuta5</a>

[Moobs]

what

[executioneer]

so you don't get laid because you have asperger's, then

[Chojin]

"Take a guess on my religion."
"Christian?"
"HOW DARE YOU LABEL ME"

[ZAKO the GREAT]

i don't really know what the hell you talking bout..:hypno:hypno:hypno

[Spetsnaz]

Shoulda told her... "We are the Borg"...

[Dr. Boogie]

Where is it that a person asks you what caste you're in?

[Chojin]

Chess club.

[Dr. Boogie]

"Hey baby, looking for a 'check mate'?"

[Spetsnaz]

"I can put you in "check". All niight long."

I think coming up with sexual Chess euphrisms should be included in every school cirriculum.

[SamGamgee]

I'm up for a little castling myself. How about you?

[MLE]

"'ll cross-check you right back" :wink

[Spetsnaz]

"Baby, you can't handle my rook."

[MLE]

"if you're nice, I'll show you my flank opening" ;>

[Spetsnaz]

"I'd like to jump my knight into your flank opening."

[MLE]

"How about we skip the formalities and go right to the endgame?"

[Spetsnaz]

"Checkmate!"

Fuck, I can't top that one.

[MattJack]

"Now Imma get on your queen with this horse head, this shit is hot."

[MarioRPG]

Bishop to queen 6, if you know what I mean!

:(

[Emu]

"The pawn is kind of shaped like a penis, when you think about it"

[Esuohlim]

"After this game of chess let's engage in sexual intercourse :hat"

[Fatacula]

I always feel so inadequate playing with the white pieces.... :p hehehehe...

[Schimid]

"Wait 'til you see my Two-Move Solution"

[executioneer]

"queen me", idk

[Zomboid]

"let's fuck" ;)

[Sethomas]

"A game between two kings doesn't strike your fancy? Well, in just a few moves I can turn this pawn into a queen and end this stalemate."

[HickMan]

"Well, just - a look at that girl with the lights comin' up in her eyes.
She's got to be somebody's baby.
She must be somebody's baby.
All the guys on the corner stand back and let her walk on by.
She's got to be somebody's baby.
She must be somebody's baby.
She's got to be somebody's baby.
She's so fine.
She's probably somebody's only light.
Gonna shine tonight.
Yeah, she's probably somebody's baby, all right.

I heard her talkin' with her friend when she thought nobody else was around.
She said she's got to be somebody's baby; she must be somebody's baby.
Cause when the cars and the signs and the street lights light up the town,
She's got to be somebody's baby;
She must be somebody's baby;
She's got to be somebody's baby.
She's so....
She's gonna be somebody's only light.
Gonna shine tonight.
Yeah, she's gonna be somebody's baby tonight.

I try to shut eyes, but I can't get her outta my sight.
I know I'm gonna know her, but I gotta get over my fright.
We'll, I'm just gonna walk up to her.
I'm gonna talk to her tonight.
Yeah, she's gonna be somebody's only light.
Gonna shine tonight.
Yeah, she's gonna be somebody's baby tonight.
Gonna shine tonight, make her mine tonight."