The Max Burbank Appreciation Thread

[Tadao]

Hey Max,
I know you are going through some tough times. Bad things seem to always come all at once. I just wanted to tell you to buck up or eat a dick. No room for pussies in America.

[Dr. Boogie]

I heard he got a job at the homo factory making "No on Prop 8" buttons.

[Guitar Woman]

Max Burbank is a pretty cool guy

[Tadao]

Max GW thinks you are a pretty cool guy. You need to snap out of this quickly or else your wife will leave you for a real man.

[pac-man]

Max writes a damn fine article.

[Mockery]

Max is coming back this month, he already told me about some material he's working on. :)

[Dr. V]

max is a sexy humaing.

[goldenbane]

A long while ago I once commented that I thought "Max Burbank is the hardest working unfunny man on I-Mockery" meaning that I didn't find his stuff funny, but that I was really impressed by the amount of material he posted on the site day after day. Max proceeded to shove my foot in my mouth by writing several articles after my comment, each of which I laughed my butt off. I sincerly hope everything is good with Max and I hope he comes back very soon!

[Tadao]

Shut the fuck up

[McClain]

** I move away from the mic to breathe in

[Grislygus]

max is a sexy humaing.

I thought you said sexy humbug for a second there

I imagine that would be a badass thing to be

[Tadao]

I SEE YOU MR. BURBANK!

[mburbank]

I'm sort of back. I'm starting to dip my toe in the I-mockery pool. I haven't got a lot to say just yet, but I do want to thank this entire stupid community for all it's stupid support during this stupidly difficult time in my stupid life.


And I am not crying. My eyes are red because I incessantly smoke hand rolled cigarettes and I cut the cheapest tobacco I can buy with pencil shavings.

[Colonel Flagg]

I'm sort of back.

About time, too. Going through withdrawl here. :hypno

Seriously.

[executioneer]

max burbank you are my favourite

[Dr. V]

max burbank you are my favourite

And my favorite.

[pac-man]

And fave myvorite.

[Zomboid]

I think you're just OKAY.

[george]

PENCIL SHAVINGS!!??

you should try crack, it's cheaper than cigarettes and a great way to lose weight.

sad to hear about hard times max, it has been suck AND blow down this way as well, you should get a paper route, i got one, and it is nothing but fun.

i spent the whole month of october tearing own McCain/Retard signs from rich peoples front yards. and the paper gives me a LIST of who is on vacation, just in case, ynow, i want a free big screen tv or something. im saving that idea until i am comfortable with seven years of getting gay love and snug in the crotch jumpsuits.

[Mockery]

http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/secret-santa/max07/max-santa1.jpg

[Tadao]

I SAID BUCK UP NOT PLAY WITH DOLLIES! USA! USA!

[Colonel Flagg]

Hey Max! Your secret admiree just got named to People's sexiest men alive issue. Yes, that's right! I refer to the dreamy Zac Efron. :swoon

Edit: He didn't win, that honor went to Hugh Jackman.

[mburbank]

You know I love Wolverine, but I think they made a mistake, because even his healing power cannot overcome the giant wave of sexy that Zac lays down.

I've seen Highschool Musical Three.

I almost died from seizures of pure delight.

[Colonel Flagg]

He should do a song and dance cover of Timberlake's "Sexy Back". That would be uber-gay.

[Tadao]

If Max doesn't come back, can I have his Legos?

[Tadao]

Ph*cking brilliant!

Going through the I-M archives to get my hands on all things Burbank. Awesome stuff. Take Mark Twain, Christopher Hitchens, Lewis Black's right eyeball, and the stomach lining of Ogden Nash, put them all in a blender, get really pissed off when you realize they won't fit in a blender, but then imagine really, really hard that they would....and you would have the essence of Max Burbank. Only, y'know, a whole lot less messy than all that stuff blended together would be.

DAMMIT ALL TO HELL YOU HAVE THE GAYEST FANS

[Tadao]

An Essay Recommending John Hodgman's New Book That Sadly Ends Up Being Mostly About Me (http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69701567)

Absolute rubbish! I got bored halfway through. I hate your fans!

[mburbank]

I gay love all my gay fans

[Cosmo Electrolux]

I would SO do you, Max...

[Tadao]

So, I see you log in every now and again. You can at least ask how I'm doing. It's not like I don't still love you, I know things are different now. I saw you the other day. You looked into the store window trying to pretend we didn't make eye contact. BUT I SAW YOU WATCH ME WALK AWAY IN THE REFLECTION OF THE ANTIQUE MIRROR. I'll always love you and you'll soon know that. SOON MY DEAR, SOON!

[Pentegarn]

I suggest a reckless romantic gesture involving a boombox and thousands of dollars worth of flowers Tadao

[Colonel Flagg]

I know for a fact that the "romantic gesture" should also preferably involve mescaline, LSD, and/or various other hallucinogenic compounds. He may be running low.

Just trying to help, Max. :)

[mburbank]

I'm just doing my JD Sallinger tribute.

[Mockery]

Good to see ya back online Max :eek

[Cosmo Electrolux]

wow...a vet reunion! :love

[Colonel Flagg]

I'm just doing my JD Sallinger tribute.

Hopefully not by drinking any bodily fluids. :x

(PS - Hi Max!)