The pickle experiment.

[Kitsa]

All this talk about red pickles got me thinking. Also it got me googling "red pickle". Some of the results didn't look photoshopped, and that's how I learned that there are really red pickles and they're really popular in the South right now.

I guess the pickles are re-pickled in Kool Aid, so you could make about any color you wanted, but the red ones are the popular ones. I sorted through a few recipes and decided to go for the easiest recipe that's supposed to yield the most intense flavor. You know, because I'm not a pansy.

And you're coming with me.

STEP 1: Prep.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/1.jpg

One jar of pickles, one packet of cherry kool-aid, one mixing container. Check.

STEP 2: Pour pickle juice from jar into measuring container.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/2.jpg

STEP 3: Dump kool-aid packet into pickle juice; mix.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/3.jpg

You know, I thought the smell would be horrible, but it was not at all objectionable. The cherry smell kind of blended in.

STEP 4: Dump cherry pickle juice back into jar.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/4.jpg

I removed a couple of pickles to make sure they all soaked evenly. The pickles I saw online were a really vivid red, and I want that. There's so much food coloring in Kool Aid that it shouldn't take long.

STEP 5: Reseal and put in the back of your fridge for 2 weeks.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/5.jpg

Done. With a big note advising any scavengers to leave them the hell alone.

Now we wait. :picklehat

[MarioRPG]

So... what flavour are we expecting? Cherry and brine? Or is it purely just a colour change?

[Kitsa]

I'm thinking it will come out sweet and sour-ish.

[MarioRPG]

Fantastic. I want to see how this pans out. :)

[executioneer]

sweet pickles, bleah

[k0k0]

I'd give you a red pickle due to the experiment, but that'd be mean for such quality, so you'll have to settle for the green variety.

PS - Your counter is immaculate. I'm guessing you live in a clean room and the intel dudes with the microchips are right next to you working on hardware while you work on pickles in your clean suit.

[Kitsa]

Something like that. This was my mom's kitchen, actually. Mine is usually about the same. I'm a neat freak who lives with slobs, so it's hard for me to keep up.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

http://www.menards.com/main/store/20090519001/items/media/Wallcoverings/famous_daves_wall/ProductMedium/FD_Spears.jpg

These are where its at.

[Evil Robot II]

The sugar will promote bacteria growth which will make you sick. You shouldnt attempt this with kool aid.

[executioneer]

kitsa don't you realize what you're doing

if the red pickles turn out to be GOOD, it will turn the i-mockery reputation system UPSIDE DOWN

you MANIAC

[ThrashO]

and itll be gross.

[Tadao]

I have a red pickle a week out of each month.

[creeposaurus]

The one's I had tasted like Red Hots with a picklish taste. I didn't ask how.

[Kitsa]

The sugar will promote bacteria growth which will make you sick. You shouldnt attempt this with kool aid.

It's not mixed kool-aid with sugar. It's the powder only, which is more or less ascorbic acid and food coloring, combined with the brine that was already in the pickles.

I rejected pickle recipes with sugared kool-aid for this reason.

It shouldn't be more or less harmful than any other two-week-old jar of pickles in the back of the fridge.

[Mockery]

This is great. If it works, you should totally do a pickle of each color and then make a rainbow pickle display. Can't wait to see how the red pickle turns out.

[executioneer]

and then eat them all and then throw up and post it on rainbowpuke.com

[Pentegarn]

This thread and almost all who posted in it before me win the internet

[Mockery]

and then eat them all and then throw up and post it on rainbowpuke.com
I like the way you think, sir. :rock

[Chojin]

win the internet

thanks for ruining it for everyone

[Zhukov]

Are there places where people actually eat pickles, then?

[Kitsa]

Some people rather enjoy them.

[Pentegarn]

thanks for ruining it for everyone

That's why I said before me, but thanks for ruining that

[MarioRPG]

Dammit Kitsa, my plan was to come along on this wild ride with you... But instead of cherry I was going to choose my favourite flavour (lemon lime aka green). But I wussed out :x

[Kitsa]

Go for it, but I doubt you'll see too much of an exciting color change with the lime. I've got berry blue somewhere, but I ran out of jars of pickles.

[k0k0]

sweet pickles, bleah

I like gherkin sweet pickles. I used to eat those 10 at a time as a kid.

[Tadao]

I like gherkin sweet pickles. I used to eat those 10 at a time as a kid.

I bet you did.

[k0k0]

You son of a bitch! That better not be a snide ribbing about cock gobbling.

[Kitsa]

Pickle check! It's been 3 days.

When I opened the jar, I was surprised and a little alarmed to see that much of the red pigment was gone from the liquid. Then I thought, well, no shit Kitsa, it's in the pickle skins. I guess it just absorbed faster than I thought it would.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklecheck3.jpg

The pickle is definitely red. The darker the original, the more turdlike the revision. I fished out a medium-dark one so you could see. There are really bright ones and really dark ones. I was impressed with the deep red color.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklecheck.jpg

Let's bisect it and see how deep the pigment runs.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklecheck2.jpg

Surprisingly deep, really, given that it's only been three days. I had the idea originally that the pickles would be red all the way through and it could probably happen, but there's so little pigment left in the pickle brine I'm not sure exactly how. Maybe it's super-concentrated and seeps through gradually, dunno. Will have to keep an eye on it.

I also sliced it and did a taste test. It was surprising...if you could imagine an exact hybrid between sweet pickle and cherry kool-aid, this would be it. It wasn't completely unpleasant, anyway. If it were a dill pickle to start out, it probably would have been disgusting. But it was already sweet and a little tangy, so the cherry flavor wasn't completely out of place.

I'm not sure what the point is of soaking it for two whole weeks, as the flavor was fairly intense and the color took so quickly. I think I'm going to check it again in a few days and see what the rate of progress is.

[Colonel Flagg]

Kitsa - Pickle Princess. :)

[Zhukov]

Yes, yes, but can you sell them?

[Kitsa]

Zhukov! I thought you were a good communist. Why sell them when I can teach you how to make them, comrade?

[Zhukov]

I help those that help themselves.

[Kitsa]

Then you can sell them.

[Kitsa]

Forgot to mention that I also brought home another jar of pickles, and two more colors of kool-aid (berry blue and grape), but upon closer inspection I seem to have grabbed the wrong jar. All of the pickles in this jar are of the "mini-gherkin" variety and very dark, so I don't think they'll take as well.

Edit: fuck it

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/twonew1.jpg

in the fridge they go.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/twonew2.jpg

I think the blue will take really well. I don't know about the grape. It's very dark and sinister-looking and has scuzzies on the top that don't stir away.

[Zhukov]

I think I'll be hard pressed to find pickles or Kool-Aid anyway.

[Kitsa]

You should have told me. I would gladly have sent you kool-aid.

[Seven Force]

If this is anything like pickle surprise, count me in.

[Kitsa]

make it purple, let me chop it in half to reveal a red interior, and we'll talk.

[Boondocksaintbro]

what is this website about

[Chojin]

hate crimes

[ThrashO]

Pickle check! It's been 3 days.

When I opened the jar, I was surprised and a little alarmed to see that much of the red pigment was gone from the liquid. Then I thought, well, no shit Kitsa, it's in the pickle skins. I guess it just absorbed faster than I thought it would.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklecheck3.jpg

The pickle is definitely red. The darker the original, the more turdlike the revision. I fished out a medium-dark one so you could see. There are really bright ones and really dark ones. I was impressed with the deep red color.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklecheck.jpg

Let's bisect it and see how deep the pigment runs.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklecheck2.jpg

Surprisingly deep, really, given that it's only been three days. I had the idea originally that the pickles would be red all the way through and it could probably happen, but there's so little pigment left in the pickle brine I'm not sure exactly how. Maybe it's super-concentrated and seeps through gradually, dunno. Will have to keep an eye on it.

I also sliced it and did a taste test. It was surprising...if you could imagine an exact hybrid between sweet pickle and cherry kool-aid, this would be it. It wasn't completely unpleasant, anyway. If it were a dill pickle to start out, it probably would have been disgusting. But it was already sweet and a little tangy, so the cherry flavor wasn't completely out of place.

I'm not sure what the point is of soaking it for two whole weeks, as the flavor was fairly intense and the color took so quickly. I think I'm going to check it again in a few days and see what the rate of progress is.

I was looking at this thread on my iPhone, and everything was really small, and I seriously thought you took a picture of a dump you took, and then you pulled one out and put it on a napkin

I was disappointed when I realized that they were pickles :(

Anyways, they look kind of tasty, my I suggest perhaps perforating the pickles first? Maybe with a fork or toothpick? Could speed up the tastiness process.

:picklehat

[Colonel Flagg]

what is this website about

hate crimes

And stalkers. And stop motion animation.

[Kitsa]

Well, I know it's only been a day but curiosity got the better of me. I decided to check on the progress of my Berry Blue and Grape pickles.

Not looking good.

The berry blue:
http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/blue.jpg

sort of a really, really, really deep teal when you combine it with the green the pickle was already. It was so dark you could just barely tell that it was blue, at first glance.

Here's the cross section:

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/bluecrosssection.jpg

You can see that barely any blue has made it past the skin. I sliced off a bit for a taste, and it can best be described as "fruit punch and bile". I'll leave them soaking and hope something magical happens in the next couple of days.

The grape was even worse:

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/grape.jpg

It came out of the kool-aid/brine mixture black as ink, and the brine had changed from purple to raisin-brown. The smell was horrendous.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/grapecrosssection.jpg

The cross section was much the same as the blue one, not a lot of penetration there. In this case, that's probably not a bad thing. I made myself try a slice, and that's a flavor I'd be happy to never experience again. Think "grape jolly rancher dipped in salted puke" and you'd come close. Truly, truly vile. A good thing to make someone eat on a dare.

I don't know why the cherry ones are working and the others aren't, but I have a feeling it has something to do with the warm flavor working better with the brining spices. Grape and blue raspberry have strong personalities, and apparently they don't play well with others.

[k0k0]

Those grape ones are pretty gross looking. It looks like they're getting slowly rotted.

[Pentegarn]

what is this website about

hate crimes

We would have also accepted any of the following answers:

1) about 2 hours long

2) the benjamins

3) about 200 lbs on average

[Pentegarn]

I liked that they really soak the colors well on the surface though, not the ones they were intended to though, but still good looking results

[The Nun Eater]

They don't sound too tasty, but they look really neat. That red one is like a "blood pickle". Might could use it for a Halloween decoration or something. Teal one has badass color, just wish it would of soaked deeper. Interesting project though, cool stuff.

[Chojin]

WOULD HAVE WOULD HAVE WOULD HAVE WOULD HAVE

[creeposaurus]

They were edible until I saw what purple pickles looked like. THEY LOOK LIKE POO.

You should try poking holes with a pointy thing then boiling them in kool aid and see if that makes the inside the same color also. I'd do it but people wouldn't appreciate strange experiments involving kool-aid or pickles. D:

[Kitsa]

Ok, as far as the Berry Blue and Grape varieties are concerned, I decided at the check today that I was concluding the experiment. They're already pretty gross and I think more time would just intensify that.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklesfinishing1.jpg

They seem to have taken the food coloring much better and faster than the cherry ones did, I'll give them that. We've got 100% saturation in about a third of the time.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/bluepickles.jpg

As far as the taste is concerned, the Berry Blue tasted almost exactly like the blue Cry Baby or Tear Jerker candy. Not horrible, very sour with a fruit aftertaste, not something I'd race to try again.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/grapepickles.jpg

The Grape brine was somewhat purple, I guess because the majority of the color soaked into the pickles. They were all inky-black. The taste? Well, the taste was pretty freaking horrible. It was definitely more grape-y than the last time I tried some. It was a strong grape taste, but with a bad salty-sour aftertaste. Like you ate something grape and had a vomit-burp, that's what this was like. I took two bites, but I couldn't finish a whole pickle.

The cherry pickle brine had faded a great deal, so I assumed the pickles had absorbed even more:

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/cherrypickle1.jpg

I got a half Pram Maven of pickles out and lined them up. Note variations in color, pickles that stuck out above the brine level.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/cherrypickle2.jpg


I was sure that these would be red all the way through, too, but when I cut them open I was surprised to see that the red still hadn't penetrated too far.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/cherrypickle3.jpg

They were good, though. Sweet-and-sour, just like I thought they'd be. I ate two of them with no problem.

Strangely enough, all of the "kool aid pickles" or "koolickles" or whatever they show up as in the news (http://www.foodandwine.com/slideshows/americas-wacky-fair-foods/2) are red. So maybe I'm not the only one who learned the hard way.

[Chojin]

a half pram maven of pickles

:lol

[dextire]

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/grapepickles.jpg

Like you ate something grape and had a vomit-burp, that's what this was like.
Haha, that's exactly how I would imagine the black blood of the earth pickles should taste! :halloween2

[The Nun Eater]

The blue and purple ones don't look that appealing, but I am definitely feeling the red pickles. I wonder if you could get similar results but without ruining taste by just using red food coloring instead.

[Kitsa]

I'm a bit of an expert in the making-foods-different-colors field (no, really) and I'm fairly sure you can. I don't think it will absorb as well because some of the acids in the kool-aid powder might be speeding the process along, but I am confident that you can turn ordinary pickles red without too much of a change in taste.

But imho, the taste is part of the adventure.

[Zhukov]

I just ate one for the first time, and it's actually quite tasty.

They're called gherkins here.

[Kitsa]

now that you've located those, let me know if you need any kool-aid.

[Zhukov]

Is Kool-aid a powder, or do you purchase it in liquid form? I'm sure I could procure a replacement.

The gherkins I ate were good, but they were sweet when I expected them to be savoury. I was thinking of just putting them in jelly for some reason.

[Zhukov]

By 'jelly' I mean "Jell-o". Not what you should be calling 'jam'.

EDIT: Oh wait I have an edit button now; I could have fixed that.

[k0k0]

Yeah, Kool-aid is a powder that you mix with sugar.

[Kitsa]

Yes, cheap little powder packets, most people mix them with about a teacup of sugar in a large pitcher. I don't, but that's how much sugar I've tasted in most people's.

There are sweet pickles and dill pickles and hot pickles. They all sort of fit different tastes and situations.

[Esuohlim]

By 'jelly' I mean "Jell-o". Not what you should be calling 'jam'.

We have both jelly AND jam, where jelly is processed from fruit juice and jam is processed from fruit chunks. WORLD OF DIFFERENCE.

[Nick]

Kitsa, you've almost convinced me to try this out myself. I'm curious to how they taste.

[Kitsa]

If I were you, I would go for cherry or black cherry and skip the other two.

[Nick]

You did use regular dill pickles for this and not sweet pickles, right? Personally, I have no idea how anyone can eat those sweet pickles you buy at the super market.

[Kitsa]

These are sweet pickles, but I specifically got the "no sugar added" version to take as much sugar out of the equation as possible.

I have no idea how this works with dill pickles, I think the flavor clash would be too much.

[Nick]

Oh, man. Someone needs to try this out on dill pickles. I suppose it'd taste like a sour cherry would.

[ThrashO]

Is Kool-aid a powder, or do you purchase it in liquid form?

Nigga. What da hell planet you on.

[Zhukov]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v74/Vincered/DSC_1233.jpg

This is my attempt.

[The Leader]

My God.

[k0k0]

NSFW!

[Supafly345]

You didn't just paint a pickle did you?

[Fathom Zero]

hahahahahaha

[Nick]

It looks like it's been put in a cup of easter egg dye.

[MattJack]

This is my attempt.

:lol

That looks like something you'd read about in the Bible.

[k0k0]

I bet it smells like a bible story too.

[Zhukov]

I bet it smells like a bible story too.

Actually, it smells like paint.

[Kitsa]

it sort of looks like a dog's chew toy.

[Colonel Flagg]

..that you might buy when visiting Provincetown, or South Beach.

[Babs]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v74/Vincered/DSC_1233.jpg

This is my attempt.

Spray paint?

[Mockery]

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/bluepickles.jpg

This murders my brain every time I look at it.

Keep the colors coming. The pickle rainbow must be completed!

[Bucket]

When I saw this I thought of Alton Brown's "Feasting on Asphalt: The River Run." He stopped by a place in the South that sold these kool-aid pickles and bought some, and put a recipe in the companion book (I have it and I could transcribe it if you'd like me to.)

[k0k0]

What flavor did Alton use in the book?

[Tacobot]

These pickles are so cool! they make me want to do some pickle experiments maybe mix it all together for some evil black pickles. thanks for sharing them.

[executioneer]

Spray paint?
he is a graffiti enthusiast, after all

[Tadao]

Kitsa, have you shaped one into a figure and then soaked it yet?

[blood_panther]

i wonder if a person could just use food coloring. you could add a bunch more and it shouldnt affect the taste.

[executioneer]

where's the fun in that

also someone suggested that already

[Kitsa]

Actually...:posh

Food coloring can definitely change the flavor of food. Red, purple and black all seem to have a mildly bitter aftertaste. Also, I use a lot of natural food colorings in my work and, since they're derived from turmeric and things like that, they often retain some of the flavor. I assure you it's quite weird to taste a cake with turmeric-laced icing.

[MarioRPG]

Someone should have used that magic koolaid. that is red and tastes like blue.

[Bucket]

What flavor did Alton use in the book?

He used cherry.

[Kitsa]

It's been almost 2 and a half months, so I decided to make my final evaluation.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/picklejar.jpg

The brine looks redder in this picture than it really is, mainly because of the concentration of red pickles inside. When I poured out the brine, there was barely any red in it. It was just the straw-colored urine-y shade of normal pickle brine. I took this to mean that all of the red that could be absorbed...done been absorbed.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/prammaven.jpg

Most of the pickles were nice, deep, vivid red. A few had developed a disconcerting waxy residue, and I'm not entirely sure what that was. I didn't touch them. They were all the way at the bottom of the jar and there were plenty of normal red pickles on the top to be had.

http://i799.photobucket.com/albums/yy271/kitsa_for_imockery2/crosssection.jpg

As you can see here, the redness has soaked just about all of the way through. There were a few lighter, yellowish patches in some of the bigger pickles, but the majority of them were completely saturated. I cut some slices to make sure, and yep, saturated through the full thickness of the pickle.

I tentatively did a taste test, and I was surprised to find that the flavor had entirely morphed to sour cherry. There was no pickle flavor left, it was just sour cherry. Sort of like a red lifesaver with a sour edge to it. Very good, actually.

So there you have it...the final observations of the pickle experiment.

[Aaarg]

yum

[Emu]

Those look... actually not bad.

[kahljorn]

SO THATS WHERE ALL OF PRAM MAVENS PICKLES WENt

[Kitsa]

He was stashed in my fridge the whole time, animating my mayonnaise.

[executioneer]

sour cherry pickle and mayo sandwich time, then?

[Kitsa]

well, sure, if you WANT HIM INSIDE YOU.

[Pentegarn]

First time for everything I suppose

[ThrashO]

I want to make these now.

So Kitsa, there is no hope for other flavors? Only Red?

Did you happen to hang on to any of the other colors to see if they would push out the pickle taste and retain only koolaid flavor?

Also, these were just dill pickles? No sugar was used, only the flavor packet?

I AM INTEREST.

[Kitsa]

Dear Interest,

Having experimented with cherry, berry blue and grape, I can say that cherry is the only flavor that didn't ultimately resemble vomit. My food-artist intuition says that this is because the cherry flavor is a warm, sweet flavor that plays well with others, and the other two aren't. If peach or apricot were kool-aid flavors, they might work. I think lemonade and lemon-lime would be too sour.

I ended the grape and berry blue experiments early because they became totally saturated quickly and the flavor and scent were repulsive. They seemed to soak up the color and flavor more quickly than the cherry did.

I would do either cherry or black cherry for best results. This was a jar of gherkin sweet pickles, the kind that have "no sugar added" and use Splenda. This was to discourage any additional bacterial growth, since we're talking an opened jar in the back of the fridge for a couple of months. There was nothing added but the kool-aid packet. I dumped the brine into a measuring cup, added the kool-aid powder, swished it around, and dumped it back in the jar. That's it.

Best of luck.

[k0k0]

If only Sharkleberry Fin were alive he'd totally piss all over that theory.

[executioneer]

what about orange, do you think orange flavor might be okay

[Kitsa]

I don't know. Orange is difficult to mistake for anything else, and that's sort of the boat grape is in. But by all means try it.

[k0k0]

I may try tropical punch when I'm feeling better. I'll post it if I do.

[dextire]

Tropical punch pickles actually sound pretty good.

I made rainbow pickles (http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69707723) myself. Figured it'd be better to post it in a separate thread rather than flood this one with a bunch of photos. :halloween2