Hey guys, I have another problem and I NEED your help

[CaptainBubba]

Is it possible to be TOO good at sex???? I'm really genuinely worried. Please help guys. :(

Time is running out for me. I have to know, now. :( :(

[Big McLargehuge]

I hear if you are too good you can make the girls face explode :eek,

[Esuohlim]

Absolutely not. Women are never fully satisfied. They lie like pigs, too. Every sound they make while you "do it" is completely fabricated to make you more horny so you can get done faster.

There's a worldwide conspiracy among the female gender, which is that the clitoris actually does something. It doesn't. So don't bother even trying to please her, she can't feel it.

The only way they orgasm is if you punch them in the nose really hard, so I'm told.

[Mr. Vagiclean]

nose punch is considered a foreplay, a dropkick in the torso area is the real stinger i am told

[FartinMowler]

Didn't you say last week that it was your first time? :lol

[Pee Wee Herman]

If you're too good at sex, you'll get an STD.

[Terra]

Your going to have to define how good "too good" is. I haven't ever heard of anybody being too good.

[FartinMowler]

Your going to have to define how good "too good" is. I haven't ever heard of anybody being too good.

Well, If I was experienced and you weren't that would make me too good for you because you wouldn't know what to do.

[Esuohlim]

Girls don't do anything. They just lie there and be naked. >:

[FartinMowler]

Girls don't do anything. They just lie there and be naked

1 out of 5 are duds :( or that's my ratio so far.

[Terra]

[quote]
Well, If I was experienced and you weren't that would make me too good for you because you wouldn't know what to do.

That wouldn't make you "too good" for anybody. It would make you a bit more experienced. But not "too good."

[executioneer]

hey captain bubba what happened to being a virgin and being proud of it :rolleyes

or am I thinking of someone else :rolleyes

-willie

[executioneer]

I like making pamphlets about how abstinence empowers me as a teenager. :)


:rolleyes

-willie

[Perndog]

Virgins only act like they're proud of it because they can't get laid. They drop the pride like a rock the moment they know they're going to do the deed.

[Drew Katsikas]

Terra is the only one who doesn't get a joke in this thread.

DEFINE TOO GOOD

[Pee Wee Herman]

By too good, I mean being so good at sex that you get STDs.

You'd, like, have to use a god mode cheat or something to protect yourself from STDs if you're that good.

[CaptainBubba]

I am the president and founder of the abstinence club at my school. Our slogan is:

"If this doesn't get us laid. Nothing will"



And on a side note I'm severely upset that Willie seemingly no longer gets sarcasm... I love achewood too :(

This thread is kinda pitiful. But it reminds me why I "quit the forums" :lol

[ScruU2wice]

Were you doing it while you typed that, cuz that would make you too good :(

[executioneer]

wtf how is this sarcasm or achewood related >:

-willie

[Pee Wee Herman]

Theoretically, it is possible to be too good at sex by fucking a girl so hard that you kill her.

Theoretically, when you fuck a girl, you could thrust your pelvis so rapidly that the friction causes a fire inside her pussy.

[Esuohlim]

You try to be funny, but it seriously never works.

[Terra]

[quote="Drew Katsikas"]Terra is the only one who doesn't get a joke in this thread.

That's because I've fucked a lot of "jokes" to realize that one of them could actually write. :)

I guess there is hope for those ten fingers on everybody's hands. And not just covering up for the thumb that happens to be embedded up the ass's. :)

[Schimid]

Wow, :) Terra. You :) sure :) are great :) at insults :).

[Supafly345]

I never knew she was so cruel.

[Terra]

I was just *kidding.*

:)

[AChimp]

Well, I'm relieved. :)

[Sicktodeathmx]

If I was a guy I would fuck Terra :/