I usually just play Roger Daltrey screaming YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH when they try to talk.

Well, you know us at least ;)

can you ever really know anyone though

Yeah, people are pretty easy to read these days.

I didn't realize how much content was cut from Half Life 2 before it was released.

On top of that all the stuff that got removed look fucking awesome

Like what.

Half life 2 was the most bland anti-climactic p.o.s. I ever spent money on.

Weapons, levels, characters, atmosphere, plot devices, anything that would have made it a good game, you know.

ಠ_ಠ

They do that for pretty much every game.

AND YOU GUYS WONDER WHY I COMPLAIN ABOUT EVERY GAME THAT COMES OUT.

Its no secret that games typically suck these days, with an exception to a handful (until nameless ass hats overhype the sin out of it), but can you really say that every new game merits a complaint?

Edit: I take it back, most games do merit a complaint or two, if not all.

Earthbound doesn't

HappyHamster: Has opinions about stuff.

EDIT - No, wait, doesn't!

Because it´s your role in this mini-universe that is the I-Mockery Forums?

Yeah, true...got me there.

Aw Schimid...wheres the dick eating insult? All you have for me is that I dont have opinions? :(

I beat Soul Reaver 2 awhile ago. Other than the puzzles the game mechanics were pretty shitty but the story was so good that I was burning up for more. I immediately went to play Legacy of Kain: Defiance and after ten minutes I'd lost all interest. The narrative feels too much like a video game, that might sound stupid but if your a fan of the series I think you might know what I mean. Plot seems to take a back seat to explaining game mechanics, Kain at one point actually makes a video game "in-joke." Am I being to quick to judge maybe?

No, you're not. That series peaked with Soul Reaver as far as I'm concerned.

The series peaked with Blood omen itself, the first one ;)

Loved that one. Blood Omen 2 droned on, and I had to force myself to play it just to get to the end, not out of enjoyment...

Yahtzee's Deus Ex song made my day :(

mine too :( plus wth how come aus ain't get rock band yet i've been waiting for that review for like a year >:

Anybody else read about the Watchmen game?

A six-part downloadable brawler on the PSN, Xbox Live Arcade, and Steam set five years before the comic and movie. I'm really getting into the Watchman, and the original illustrator's in on the games, as well as Zack Snyder, so I think it'll be alright.

Why....goddammit, why should a Watchmen game fucking exist? Its bad enough a movie is being made...it was fine the way it was, in comic form. Theres no need for a movie, let alone a game regardless of how "good" it might be.
I could be in for a surprise, but I wont hold my breath.

Watchmen video game? Mehhhh I'm on the fence about this one :\

I can't help but be excited about anything Watchmen right now. Sure, there's a big chance that the movie and game will turn out to be shitty, especially to those of us that really like the novel. Having said that, Watchmen has such a great plot, characters, and mood that it would be a crime to not bring it to the masses.

Yeah but that doesnt exactly mean that it should be made into a movie or game... if the world should see it (again) then it should be re-released in the form of some kind of....giant book. And you could just pick it up at a store that sells other books, of various kinds... a store of books.
I shouldnt bitch though, I enjoyed the Sin City movie... Still, I wouldnt be surprised if the movie turns out shit (including the game.)

There's sort of this stigma about comic books, which is why a lot of people don't bother with them. How many people knew Road to Perdition or A History of Violence were graphic novels before they were movies? Plus I'm pretty sure that reading in general has taken a backseat to movies and games with recent generations. Like The Lord of the Rings or The Chronicles of Narnia, young people will discover the book via the movie.

I know and I understand, but doesnt it bother you? Even just a tiny bit, that reading has taken a backseat to movies and games?
All the great books and such are being re-made (and some are literally being re-made...by explaining the history of a certain character, or adding useless sex scenes or what have you), some of the movies have entire scenes that weren't in the books...Its kind of sad in a way.
But I hope that some people dont take the fandom to far. I mean, not to long ago, I saw someones drawing of Spider ...except that he was drawn in that obnoxious anime style and trying to ass rape Rorschach.... do you have any idea how upsetting that was? Christ....

no we've all been desensitized

Thats a damn shame. Oh well, c'est la vie, right? :\

yes it is a shame you are still not immune to being annoyed by incredibly petty things

I guess youre right... I probably should stop giving two shits about anything that goes on these days.

I'm fine with a game, a movie or a book as long as it's enjoyable. The thing about adding and deleting stuff is that movies, games, and books are completely different mediums. No one ever complains that novelizations of films tend to differ greatly from the film. Yet everyone complains when a movie differs from the book or game it's based on.

I know that they are different mediums...ones a book you read, ones a book you watch, and ones a book you play, in a way. But thats not an excuse to turn anything anyone wanted into a movie/game.
Like I said though, I enjoyed Sin City and found the comics that way, so this movie could be good. The games look pretty good but nothing I can take to seriously. (meaning i could play it for a bit but get bored before any real time passes)

Also, the reason why this is is because when you read a book, you already have this idea how everything should look and feel. When you read the book version of a movie, youve already had everything described to you (well, youve seen it visually).

And the filmmaker has an idea of how everything should look and feel too, and he's the one with the camera, cast, and money. Let's not get off topic here. The Watchmen game looks interesting, but the episodic thing has me feeling iffy. If the game was really made with the mindset of being a worthwhile addition to the film/comic/overall lore then it should merit a real release.

People read novelizations of movies?

I dont know why they would make the game episodic unless they ran out of time or something...or if they're just releasing it just to get some extra cash because of the movie coming out. (sort of like those spider-man games).
Still, a real release probably would be better, no matter how "short" the game may actually be.

Yeah, the 'I am Legend' book version of the movie apparently was more popular than the original.

When you're in Iraq you'll read just about anything. Can't explain why people would read them otherwise, though.

i read the novelizations of gremlins and spaceballs when i was in middle school :lol

They made a book out of Spaceballs? Seriously?

well you gotta remember, merchandising IS where the real money from the movie is made

I read the novelization of Blaster Master. Bitch.

the FLAMETHROWER!!!

Tetris - Fallen Blocks.

Best Cyberpunk-Historic Pirate Tale-Crossover ever.

So i'm playing neverwinter nights, AGAIN, and also writing some stand-up comedy, in case i ever accidentally go to Lake Geneva, WI.

How many people here tonight have named their first born "Gary"?
Two people... not bad. OK, how many of those are girls? The same hands went up! Unbelieveable!

Seriously though... You should name a girl GYGAX! It just sounds spooky, right? Sure, she'll be a virgin until she's 35, but that's what Dad's want, right?

Uuuuuuggggghhh (cough), so anyway, speaking of not having sex, I started building a Monk character just a couple days ago...

(crickets chirp)

A monk who was multiclassed.

I wanted versatile kick-assery.

So i multiclassed him with a Wizard.

(Chuckles, claps and a couple of boos)

I'm sorry sir, what did you say?

(Yer mother's a wizard... on my face!! [followed by imbelic laughter])

Rigghhhhhhtttt!!! I think you need to put some more points into yer Heckler skill, sir. Either that or you should ask yer Dungeon Master to re-roll the percentile dice for yer mother to not sit down on yer Dad's dick while he's jerking off.

I did say it was great to be here, didn't I?
So yeah, i went for a Monk/Wizard combo.... but here's the punchline. I took the skills i needed to became an Arcane Archer (Race:Elf, Attack bonus +6, Weapon focus: Long bow, Never leave yer Mom's attic:affirmitive)

and after 8th level I didn't get the Arcane Archer option!!!!

I guess ya just gotta be a Fighter or a Cleric or a Ranger or a Paladin, nowadays.... Or an Elf who's NOT circumcized!! Isn't that right, ladies?

(crowd throws rotten vegetables with a skill rank of 1000)

I just fulfilled all the inane requirments to get the actual ending in Cave Story and the thing glitches the fuck up when I beat the core thingy. >:

I didn't invest money in this game, but I sure is hell invested time.

Never played it but I hear its a long ass game. Sorry to hear about your bad luck.

It's long, but it's not like RPG long. A couple hours should get you right back to the same spot.

It's not super long. It's well worth playing too.

Same thing happened to me several times...damn near broke the cat over this >:

Wow. I finally got past the core, and jesus broken glass is the secret area tough. And the ticking timer & constant shaking don't fucking help. This is the shit that causes Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. And no save before the final boss. This game went from Metroid to I Want To Be The Guy.

I just started playing my roommate's Wii now that he's on vacation and I'm interested in downloading some classic games. Any suggestions?

AIR ZONK

homebrew channel :P

God yeah, Homebrew. I put it off for the longest time, but it's the best thing I've done with my Wii in ages.

Most of isn't very practical (oh, Doom, cool I guess) but the sheer fact that you can download straight from their network is a huge plus for me. No more repeatedly swapping out the SD card!

wait, now can you search for and download virtual console and wiiware titles directly from the channel? that would be bitchin'

Volume 31 December 1991
Top 30

The NES is about to get bumped out of it's solo spot on the Top 30. Beginning next month, we will expand our coverage to list the Top 20 games for Game Boy, the NES and the Super NES.

1. Super Mario Bros. 3
2. TMNT II: The Arcade Game
3. Final Fantasy
4. Battletoads
5. Crystalis
6. Dragon Warrior II
7. Mega Man III
8. The Simpons: Bart vs. The Space Mutants
9. Tetris
10. Super Mario Bros. 2
11. The Legend of Zelda
12. Startropics
13. Dr. Mario
14. Tecmo Bowl
15. Dragon Warrior
16. Wizardry
17. Destiny Of An Emperor
18. Mega Man II
19. Monopoly
20. The Little Mermaid
21. Bases Loaded II
22. Ultima: Quest Of The Avatar
23. Castlevania III: Dracula's Curse
24. Zelda II: Link's Adventure
25. Double Dragon III
26. Double Dragon II
27. Ninja Gaiden II
28. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
29. TMNT III: The Manhattan Project
30. Solstice

I remember that issue. That was the one where there was a mixup with the printers and half of the games from the top of the list were printed near the bottom. The one where it looked like Castlevania III was ranked lower than fucking Monopoly.

(Continuing from the HAY GUYZ topic)

However;

http://www.destructoid.com/re5-produ...--115615.phtml

So it all depends on the developer and which they decide to support more.

The PS3 has sold 20 million systems while the 360 has sold 28 million. The 360 has had a 1 year head start and a cheaper price point.

Pretty impressive for the PS3 i think, and no the "wars" are not over, the ps3 could easily take over the 360 this year since the thing has NO GAMES. the 360 i mean, it has no games.

This is what the Xbots get this year, Halo Wars, Halo: ODST, oh and the 50 million dollar GTA IV DLC. And maybe Alan Wake but that shit isn't even exclusive.

Also, we know that the first killzone was mediocre, but if you read some previews or actually read some real peoples reviews about the multiplayer beta, they say how great is actually is and how it lives up to the hype and not just in graphics.

You sound really insecure there...As if sales dictate how good hardware is. By that logic, Wii > Everything. Ha ha.

Stop trying to justify your purchase by dissing other consoles; justify your purchase by using the damn machine yourself. Every second you're defending it online is a second that isn't spent playing it, right?

These console arguments are just a continuation of the playground fights during recess. You know, the ones caused by mom and dad not buying both consoles. At some point, game enthusiasts put on their big boy pants and stop having stupid "lol xbot nintendrone i troll u" arguments and learn to enjoy everything for what they are.

Personally, I still can't justify buying a PS3, but someone might go halfsies with me. Actually, my family might be getting one too, which would give me some kind of incentive to visit them. If that doesn't pan out, I'm getting a 360, since their libraries are so fucking identical. PS3 has a few exclusives, 360 has a few, and that's it.

But they're all good, and before this generation is over, I'll definitely have all three.

So... The 360 is outselling the PS3. Good point?

Keep in mind that you had to add "the 360, I mean" because no one would have assumed that's what you meant otherwise.

My friend, if you don't count games that were released on multiple platforms, the PS3 is going to be in a lot of trouble.

The point of a preview is to sell a game before it comes out. You'll rarely see a preview that isn't optimistic about a game, and when you do, the most negative thing you'll read is skepticism, rather than condemnation, of a forthcoming title.

And the people who participated in the Killzone beta were likely fans of the original, which should tell you a lot about their standards for video games.

Really, kid, settle down. No one here is on board with your love of the PS3, and you're not changing anyone's mind either. The PS3 doesn't have enough exclusive games that don't totally suck to warrant buying one, so give it up already.

FUCK YOU PLAYSTATION 3 OWNERS. YOU SUCK ASS.

you know what's a troubling (but true) statement? the wii has the most exclusive titles :x

I don't find that surprising at all, though. Most of the games on the wii are gimmicky and put a lot of emphasis on the MOTION CONTROLS!!!!!!!!!! and that obviously doesn't translate to the other consoles.

Obviously, the games on the other consoles don't translate well to the wii for that same reason. If I were trying to decide which console I should get a game like Marvel Ultimate Alliance for, why the fuck would I pick the one that has slightly inferior graphics and shitty controls?

On a related note, there's talk that the Wii version of Dead Rising won't have nearly as many zombies on the screen at once due to hardware limitations. Bad controls, too, but I think that goes without saying at this point.

BUT, the Wii has the "waggle".

Psh. You're all jealous because the 360 and PS3 don't have the earth-shattering fishing controls that Animal Crossing has.

The director of the new Dead Rising (I say that because he wasn't involved with the original) was interviewed on Gamasutra to talk about the game. The interview was basically:

It sounded like they're mindful of what needs to be done, but it didn't instill a lot of confidence. Anyways, you can check the whole interview here:
http://www.gamasutra.com/php-bin/new...hp?story=21384

It says they've made the zombies faster. This could be interesting.

If by that, you mean stupid. The whole point of the first one was being mobbed by slow-moving zombies that only really got dangerous because there was so fucking many of them; it was the classic zombie formula. Having fast moving zombies is just a stupid way to compensate for the wii's shitty hardware. They should just stick with the slow-moving zombies and have fewer of em because they wanna make it easier for the "casual gamer" anyway.

I thought they were just making it look like a nintento 64 game to get around that.

Also, doesn't Resident Evil 4 regularly assualt you with asdl;kjasfd;lksfd;lkjs of Ganados, especially in hard mode? How can the Wii handle that but not some mall zombies?

Left 4 Dead has zombies sprinting at you. It's not like fast zombies don't work well.

Sure, that's different from the 360 game, but I don't think anyone expects this to be the 360 game, and clearly Capcom's not trying to make the 360 game verbatim. Really, I don't care what kind of game it is so long as it's fun, and that's my main concern.

I'd like for it to be good.

The problem is that you're seeing RE4 numbers of zombies instead of Dead Rising number of zombies. The difference between 8 or 9 zombies and 20-30 zombies.

The problem is Capcom isn't making the 360 game because they can't. The fun and challenge of Dead Rising is in dealing with big crowds of zombies. If they can't reproduce that effect for the Wii, the game isn't going to be nearly as fun, and Wii owners will just have to say "this is as good as it gets."

I don't see anything wrong with a different kind of fun. Fun is fun, whether the zombies are in giant, slow groups or fewer but fast and deadly. Either scenario can be really fun, or really shitty. It just depends on how well you can implement it. Like I said, fast zombies worked in other games before.

Know what other game has hordes of overwhelming enemies? Ninty-Nine Nights. The number of enemies doesn't make a game more or less fun; it all comes down to how well it's handled.

And besides, if you bought a Wii, you bought it to play Wii games, not 360 games (for better or worse). Unless you own all consoles, it's silly to expect to get everything that everyone else has, especially on the weakest system. If you wanted to play 360 games, you'd have bought one or plan on buying one.

I'm not arguing against the old formula; it was obviously well received. I dug it. I'm just trying to show this new game from a different perspective.

I always thought of the game as having the possibility to be one of the best or worst games ever. Picturing it as board sea-sawing at the top of a peak, with the huge number of zombies on one side of the board, and the escort missions on the other. If you took off one the game would plummet into either one of the best or one of the worst games ever made sides of the mountain, but it was balancing with perfect mediocrity. Guess which way it is sliding.

Boogie and supafly pretty much nailed it.

The whole idea was huge crowds of zombies, and if they can't present that, then it's not even the same game. Heading into the underground parkade on the 3rd day and seeing all those zombies was a really unique, fun experience. Replacing that with FAST ZOMBIES in small groups isn't exactly the same idea.

On an unrelated note - I went to the gamefaqs board for gears of war 2, and holy fuck. Those are some of the dumbest people in the world.

It's not supposed to be the same idea, though. That was my whole point :( It's almost like a spin-off. Either way, I don't think we can beat this dead horse anymore. We'll have to wait for its release before we can judge its merits.

And gamefaqs is comprised mostly of 13 year olds. It's kinda like...My First Message Board. Oh well. The walkthroughs are the whole reason to go there anyways, and at least those are usually good. If you want some good laughs, though, read some of the user reviews for games. If you pick something really popular, you'll get thirty or so perfect scores and twenty 1/10s or something.

I found out today that EGM magazine is no more, having shut down after the January 2009 issue. Normally, I wouldn't care about a magazine closing shop except that I have 4 issues left on my subscription from these bastards, and I didn't get a warning or anything from these guys. Come to think of it, I don't even think I ever got my January issue anyway.

Negativity aside, this was one of my all time favorite mags during the Playstation and beyond era. I understand why these rags are closing, but what will I read when I take a shit now?

It's the same game. How is it supposed to be a different idea?

Oh man, the new screenshots of Dead Rising have like six zombies in them.

It's not supposed to be a port. It's more of a remake-y sorta thing. CES previews state the mission structure works differently here, the zombies are less in number but behave differently, and the controls have Waggle (c). And since the title is "Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop" and not just "Dead Rising", it's clear that the developers aren't trying to make a port.

Sorta like Umbrella Chronicles, but not as drastic of a change.

We'll have to agree to disagree, but I think we can agree on one thing: this game looks old. Not even Gamecube old. Early PS2 old.

This sucks. First Tips & Tricks, now EGM. :(

I had a free year subscription to it, but then they wanted money. I said no thank you, and a couple months later, the magazine folded. Coincidence?

They got bought. UGO decided to pretty much just toss all of 1UP. Fuckers.

Almost every gaming magazine is/was garbage. EGM had articles that were actually worth reading, though. They became less in number as the internet started telling people the news a month before the magazines hit the stands. Throw in the fact that 3-man reviews were slowly getting phased out, plus the resignation of Shoe, and the magazine just wasn't what it used to be.

Actually, everyone knew EGM was probably going to be sold since Ziff Davis filed for bankrupcy. But ending the magazine, podcasts (!), and 1up Show (!!!) while simultaneously firing 30 people is really harsh, man.

The people running 1up were a big part of the network's appeal, because they had a lot of personality. Sure, people disagreed with them a lot, but they were also cool about it. They never talked down to their audience because they actually liked this hobby. 1up was a crappy website, but EGM didn't deserve to go down like this.

EDIT: Interview with UGO and 1UP: http://www.destructoid.com/destructo...7790.phtml#ext

Yahtzee Croshaw should write an entire magazine every month so I could buy it

I think there are plenty of problems with gaming-mags.

-They are never up to date (print)
-They are never objective or neutral
-They tend to tell you things about games you know anyway and don´t reveal important details.

oh and also THE INTERNET

I stopped buying gaming mags when my family got a new computer and a decent internet connection in like '98.

Holy shit nooooo. There was a tiny archive of incredible seanbaby content on 1up. Fuck, maybe he'll get a column on UGO.

seanbaby's had his own site for years, man. Sometimes he puts up EGM stuff that didn't make it to print.

I loved his reviews. I particularly remember his reviews for Cat In the Hat (GBA) Rugrats (PS2) and Barbie's Princess Adventure (GBA) being really entertaining.

I'd been reading EGM since the Sushi-X days. Gonna have to find new bathroom reading material.

Mags appeal to me because i'm not the hardcore gamer that I used to be (once the PS2/XBOX era hit, I started to drift away from gaming) and it's nice to get a new issue every month to quickly catch up on what's going on in the VG world. The only mag I even read was EGM, mainly because I loved the staff during the late 90's and I tended to agree with their reviews.

That, and nothing beats reading video game mags while on the shitter.

Mags appeal to me because its much more enjoyable to read the writings of an actual journalist. My problem is they are TOO objective, meaning they decide a games worth on its overall preformance among graphics music whatever, rather than just funfactor. They try to stand back as if it were a painting instead of what just grading it on how much fun they had.