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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:27 AM

hahahahaha what @ touching yourself

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 05:27 AM

Fuck all of you, I'm going to watch Fritz the Cat and drink if dumbass ponies are all you're gonna talk about.

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:28 AM

fritz the cat has ponies in it

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 05:29 AM

better ones

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:29 AM

ponies they try to RAPE

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 05:30 AM

there's no better kind

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:30 AM

fuck you fethom 0

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 05:31 AM

fatmom nero

what a homo name

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 730204)
hahahahaha what @ touching yourself

i don't know man i think i was thinking about pornography again :( :(

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 730211)
fatmom nero

what a homo name

Fat Homzero

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:33 AM

you'll want to hide watching ponies MORE than pornography probably (AT FIRST)

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:33 AM

FAGBOMB HERO

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:34 AM

Maybe I'll hide ponies by PRETENDING i was watching pornography :eek

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:34 AM

that is a perfectly acceptable stragety

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:35 AM

or better yet i'll flip to pornography if someone comes in the room, idk

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 05:35 AM

Maybe I can watch pornography and pretend like I'm watching pornography

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 05:36 AM


Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 05:36 AM

05:40- murder is contemplated
06:11- is this creepuncomfortable child romance or undertones of beastiality. I can't tell
06:26. YES, DAMNIT. DRINK.
07:04- Madness mantra.
07:07- DRINK. DRINK. I'VE ACTUALLY SOBERED UP WITH THIS SHIT.
07:28- CRY FOR HELP COUNT: 3
08:54- SHE BROKE. INTO. YOUR. HOUSE.
09:08- Lying bitch!
09:14- ...do the show creators not know how that works
09:22- she IS looking into it! above, confrim
10:00_ yeah, yeah surprise pary. hahahahaha. ha. ha. 'Cuase THAT's never been used before
10:21- She lives in a sweet shop. k
10:51- NOOOO! THE NAZIS ARE ON TO YOU JEWS

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:39 AM

i'll just make my own pornography with a tv in the background with ponies on it

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 730220)
BOLLYWOOD

fantastic, but not long enough

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:41 AM

willie i think this pony show is anime in a CLEVER DISGUISE and you got sucked in

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:42 AM

man last unicorn is more animesque and i like that since forever ago

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:43 AM


Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 05:43 AM

11:18- I have to admit, as this scene shows, Fear Effect III was kind of rancid balls
11:26- That would be my reaction
11:36- That is made of sadness
11:43- Pepe Le Pew knockoff alert.
11:51- ARE YOU KIDDING ME
11:53- Yes, we wget it. your'e a looney toons ripoff
12:00- I WONDER WHERE THIS IS GOING. Go fuck yourselves with a railroad spike
12:04- DIRECT. GAG. THEFT.
12:11- WISH I was watching pepe le pew
12:37- ANNE FRANK'S BEHIND THE BOOKCASE! THE BOOKCASE!

Esuohlim Jul 6th, 2011 05:44 AM

lol gus

OH WAIT NO ZUGS FOR YOU UNTIL I GIVE TO SOME OTHER UNDESERVING HOMOS

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 05:52 AM

12:50- So a nazi has a french resistanc esoldier, and the only responses he gives to his questions is "Tick!" and the nazie says, "VEE HEV VAYS... TO MAKE... YOU TOCK."
13:07- SO A JEW WALKS INTO A BAR, AND THE NAZI BARTENDER SAYS "VE DON'T VANT YOUR KIND HERE! LEAVE! AUZ WITZ YOU!"
13:26- MORE INTENSE THAN THAT SCENE FROM SCHINDLERS LIST
14:09- ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THE NAZI JIOKES REALLY FIT THAT FUCKING WELL? SERIOISLY? WHAT THE FUCK IIKINF DKIND OF KIDS SHOW IS THIS
14:18- HA. HA. HA. HA. GO DIE
skip to
15:2716:0
15:28- skip to 16:04
16:08 wairt, what
16:21- DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINK DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINK DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINK DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINK DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINK DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINK DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINK DRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKDRINKFUCKKCXJWKSJKJAKDJHJRTHIS NWHAT THEU FUCK

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 05:53 AM

16:38-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 05:54 AM

SNE WANTED HELP, SHE CRIED FOR HELP, AND YOU DIDN'T LISTEN HOLY SHIT

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 05:55 AM

ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JACK A DULL BOY

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:56 AM

oh man

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 05:57 AM

yeah that's a pretty appropriate response to 16:38

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 05:59 AM

20:07- This is no longer frightienging. Now it is sad because she doesn't get counseling. CAKE DOESN'T SOLVE EVERYTING, YOU CARE BEAR MOTHERFUCKERS

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:01 AM

YOUR FRIEND NEEDS A GODDAMNED THERAPIST

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:02 AM

ONE THAT LISTENS

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:03 AM

I BELIEVE THE TECHNIAL TERM FOR THAT IS "TRUE DAT"

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:03 AM

so antway, what now



ROLL CALL, WHO'S STILL WITH US

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:05 AM

do you want to see more ponies having mental breakdowns

you wanna watch ep26 and see fluttershy go crazzy like a bathouse

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:06 AM

I think.... that's enough ponies for a very long time

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:07 AM

okay :(

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:08 AM

Someone needs to come up wth a new conversation topic or I will talk about gay shit. REALLY gay shit, about a really femmy submissive asian man and a nineteeen year old guus

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:09 AM

you have been wanred, since I sure as hell am not getting any sleep tonight

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:09 AM

YOU'VE SEEN THE PICTURE, NOW SEE THE SHOW

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:10 AM

so how about that comicon 2012 sounds like fun right

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:10 AM

fuck it.

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:11 AM

oh, comic con. Yeah. WHat should I give a shit about

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:11 AM

I don't like comic books. I s the goon good? I heard the Goon's good. I like Warren Ellis, too

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:12 AM

And the dude who did preacher. That guy's badass as hell

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:12 AM

i dunno its to early to tell :( hopefully some tranny-camera-stealing fun like what i missed out on when i was getting my hopes crushed

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:13 AM

whu? How were you getting your hopes crushed

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 730253)
And the dude who did preacher. That guy's badass as hell

GARTH ANUS

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 730255)
whu? How were you getting your hopes crushed

i saw a girl i had a crush on kissing my good friend >:

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:15 AM

and then i met maria bamford and we had dinner at the syfy restaurant

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:15 AM

adn my brain imploded

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:16 AM

then i spent most of the next day driving 85 mph on i-5 while tweeting

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:18 AM

lol lol lol I've just been googling maria "bradford for the last five minutes, wondering who the hell ou were talking about

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:19 AM

what was that dinner like

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:20 AM

oh srry what was that dinner like

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 06:21 AM

tell me that really happened and isn't part of a joke from the previous page

<3 maria bamford

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:22 AM

i was pretty quiet. also i couldn't afford to pay for my overpriced cheeseburger so my friend had to help me pay for it

then my friend and that girl hugged me after we walked to my car

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 06:23 AM

:(

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 730264)
tell me that really happened and isn't part of a joke from the previous page

<3 maria bamford

yeah i had kind fo a weird crush on her afterwards :(

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:24 AM

Hey dom;'t sweat it, crushes are overrated. you get out there and finde= new and excitign people

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:26 AM

not me

move too slow, see

only ever get to "crush" stage

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 06:27 AM


executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:32 AM

yeah i should have talked to her more, maybe i coulda got some voice actor pointers :( or some crazy person pointers idk

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:32 AM

Don't bother with crushes. ask them out to coffe, it's what I do, nocommittal enough to bail immediately if it turns out you'r rather be shtting out tin toothpicks than talking ot the girl any longer

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:32 AM

plus her dad's like a dermatologist maybe she woulda had some skincare advice

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 730272)
Don't bother with crushes. ask them out to coffe, it's what I do, nocommittal enough to bail immediately if it turns out you'r rather be shtting out tin toothpicks than talking ot the girl any longer

i'm not even sure i want a lady in my life anymore

they're probably too much dang work

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 06:34 AM

sup fags

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 06:36 AM

i still think that 'chemical imbalance' mental disorders are bullshit, since every single person ever i've known who has had one is sedentary and lives off of cool ranch doritos

this segues nicely into a discussion of my own mental deterioration. before, i was always depressed and hated myself. after diet and exercise, i now instead hate everyone else and am looking into becoming a sociopath, because that's apparently how everyone else has been doing it all along and i never got the memo.

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:36 AM

o shit its dad

turn off the lightrs and pretend to sleep

Fathom Zero Jul 6th, 2011 06:37 AM

goodnight, moon

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 730276)
before, i was always depressed and hated myself. after diet and exercise, i now instead hate everyone else and am looking into becoming a sociopath, because that's apparently how everyone else has been doing it all along and i never got the memo.

i hate myself AND i hate everyone else

i win the hate contest

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 06:44 AM

so it's not rly a secret that i regularly visit /fit/ on the chons

it's apparently a common problem once you start working out to start judging others, especially women. i'm now acutely aware of how little effort women put into their bodies, and it pisses me off that they still pull tail. some of them actually get exponentially more praise the more cakes they eat!

it starts a slow burn of rage in my soul

yeah so anyway most women aren't attractive to me anymore because i can see they're all flabby in unfeminine ways. i'm only attracted to fit guys in an artistic sense. this narrows down my interests to reasonably fit girls and emo boys, but i'm pretty sure i couldn't love the second group.

Kitsa Jul 6th, 2011 06:46 AM

Holy shit, I go to bed and come back and here's like 10 pages of diarrhea with chunks of pony and hotdog in it :hypno

every once in a while I could almost follow it.

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:49 AM

WHAT IS UP CHOJIN

I dunno, the only people I know with mental disorders have kept it to themselves

I just found out that one of my best friends is a spaz because he has to choos etween his ADD meds (he actually has ADHD pretty bad, COMPLETE spaz) and his schizo meds

He's been in terror of seeing shit like angels crawling down the walls to get him for about twelve years now, and I never had any idea. I thank God I never had to deal with shit like THAT

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 06:52 AM

i feel there's dissonance in my life between who i am now and the people i've historically surrounded myself with. i hate most nerd mannerisms and seem to have more in common with 'normal' people, yet i've spent all my life liking nerd things and don't want to stop doing that. i have 3 or so circles of friends and still only like very few of them. i don't want to cut anyone off because i have fun with them sometimes and i feel it's important to get in the habit of leaving the house and talking to people, but it all just feels very empty.

i usually feel better when i'm working or regularly going to school, but circumstances have fuct my academic plans for the next year and now i have to get a job in the industry i'm pursuing, which is itself notorious for employing the same exact type of person i just described that i dislike.

i've been thinking lately about how i wish i had figured out how to stop being a self-loathing fat piece of shit back in high school, when i could have networked with different people and trained myself to like different things later on. It's rather pointless to agonize over, though.


Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:54 AM

lol choj, I'm spending most of my downtime at work atm convincing the girls at work that they just need to do a few situps, and do NOT need to lose any more damn weight

Seriously, this one chick is less than 130 pounds, and she wants to lose 20.wtf is up with that, girls have this insane self image problem and guys only feel bad once they can no longer run a single mile

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 06:54 AM

SOEMWHERE THE BABY WAS CRYING

:thirtyminutesofsheerannoyance

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:56 AM

It's NEVER too late to start a new network, I've abandonde two new college netwroks since the start of this year. You think people are cool and ready to work for their future, and it turns out that they all waster their time on WoW and shit like that

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 06:57 AM

why would they need to do situps

stop giving exercise advice immediately and go read a book

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:58 AM

Hell this one girl has SERIOUSLY been all the fuck ovr me all this last term, and her friends have been real buddy-buddy and "WE SHOULD COLLABORATE SOME TIME", except now that summer's around they can't be bothered to leave the house. It's alwys irritating to learn that you got the numbers of the wrong people, but fuck 'em! leave them in the dust and find new peeps

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 06:58 AM

yeah i'm hoping i'll meet some people at grad school. i plan to go somewhere ivy league so i'll also be leaving the state, which may also be cathartic. i get really uncomfortable around people i knew while i was fat.

i met some people at UB too, but again they were either nerds or party kids. some of them were actually some cool peeps who ran companies and wore underarmor (the mark of a cool bro) but i was too busy doing full time school to actually hang out with them.

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 06:59 AM

crunches, fluttrkicks

I dunno, I'm drunk. Point remains that a chick that weighs 130 does not needt to go on a fucking diet

executioneer Jul 6th, 2011 07:00 AM

unless she five three :mixalot

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 07:01 AM

Hell, it's hard to give workout advice to a girl, cause YOU'RE doing shit like incline push-ups and pull ups and squat thrusts and that shit doesn't really apply to the female figure

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 07:01 AM

in the circle of friends i see the least now, the few with girlfriends are now being cheated on in hilarious ways :lol i'd go into detail but i've been sworn to secrecy

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 07:03 AM

well yeah, the people you knew while you were fat were from what, five years ago? I can't stand all but three of my old high school friends, but I hang with them because they can be counted on to LEAVE THEIR HOUSE

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 07:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 730292)
Hell, it's hard to give workout advice to a girl, cause YOU'RE doing shit like incline push-ups and pull ups and squat thrusts and that shit doesn't really apply to the female figure

don't be retarded and propagate this bullshit. men and women should use the same exact lifting routines, women will just have lower numbers with upper body exercises. people seem to be convinced that if a woman touches a barbell she'll turn into Chyna, which would be funny if it weren't 'common knowledge' and making me buttmad on a daily basis. we don't have different muscles. maybe if you were talking about cats i would agree that the different physiology demands different maneuvers. even then, when you exercise cats you tends to do the same bodyweight exercises you do with humans.

there's a world of difference between weightlifting and being a powerlifter, and that goes for both women and men.

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 07:04 AM

Yeah, just dtch them all. It's easier for us artists, we can just dick around on projects for a couple months, not answer calls, and then find new people by just talking about how much we hate modern art and love old artists and movies

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 07:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 730254)
i dunno its to early to tell :( hopefully some tranny-camera-stealing fun like what i missed out on when i was getting my hopes crushed

That night Kahljorn almost threw up on me, and I was wondering what you were up to.

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 07:05 AM

I always thought that incline pushups would suck a girl's tits dry in a matter of months, my bad

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 07:09 AM

women are always like "i don't want gross muscles i just want to tone and firm up lol"

there are two things in your body affected by exercise: fat and muscle. reducing both makes you look anorexic. reducing the latter makes you look skinnyfat and you'll still have a belly (see: all women). reducing the first makes you look "toned". maintaining muscle mass on a calorie deficit requires you to stress those muscles enough to convince your body to cannibalize its fat resources instead. women naturally have more subcutaneous fat, so they can carry more muscle on the same frame while still appearing soft and curvy. in fact, that's the only way to achieve that look. :themoreyouknow

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 07:12 AM

but don't let me hijack the thread with fitness. let's continue to talk about how tough you dorks have it and how it's obviously unrelated to the amount of times you hit the buffet each week. and wasting all your time watching cartoons.

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 07:18 AM

I'M SORRY NERDS DID I RUIN YOUR PITY PARTY? THAT WAS A JOKE I AM NOT SORRY AT ALL I AM EMBARRASSED FOR ALL OF YOU

YOU ARE ALL DISAPPOINTMENTS, JUST LIKE YOUR PARENTS SAID YOU WERE

Kitsa Jul 6th, 2011 07:29 AM

Good news! I found out the spiders in my bathrooms are dropping down out of the vents, not coming out of the drains.

The bad news is that I figured this out after the second wolf spider dropped on my head while I was sitting on the toilet directly underneath the vent :(

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 07:33 AM

whoops sorry, dozed off fer a sec. prob eill again soon, but 'll keep on focusing

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 07:35 AM

lol kitsa


choj-dunno. the only chick I know who talks about 'toning' incessantly is a blonde moron who seems to think that five billion reps with three/five pound dumbells will help her, the rest are just obsessed with "fat rolls" that a guy would only notice while five miles already inside them

Chojin Jul 6th, 2011 07:36 AM

women are stupid brah

except kitsa, she's cool

Kitsa Jul 6th, 2011 07:38 AM

thanks for that


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