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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

kahljorn Nov 7th, 2010 11:52 PM

well thats a given part of any vacation day ;/

Tadao Nov 7th, 2010 11:59 PM

I liked the zoo, probably gonna be cold though. Same with the warf and chinatown.

kahljorn Nov 8th, 2010 12:01 AM

yea we were thinking about going to that stupid wharf :(

Fathom Zero Nov 8th, 2010 12:05 AM

Some good Chinese food there.

kahljorn Nov 8th, 2010 12:08 AM

i do love chinese :(

Fathom Zero Nov 8th, 2010 12:16 AM

and ass sex

kahljorn Nov 8th, 2010 02:19 AM

i can always tell when its going to be good

its the smell

it always gives it away

Fathom Zero Nov 8th, 2010 02:43 AM

i don't know which you're talking about, the chinese or the ass sex. But I like to think it's both.

kahljorn Nov 8th, 2010 03:02 AM

yea i had some earlier it was good
express

Sam Nov 8th, 2010 03:13 AM

EXPRESS ASS SEX

kahljorn Nov 8th, 2010 03:20 AM

LOL

IT WAS REALLY FAST

Sam Nov 8th, 2010 03:34 AM

SO FAST THE CHINESE FOOD WAS WAITING FOR YOU

MrAdventure Nov 8th, 2010 03:50 AM

chinese food is good its got ching chons in it

Pub Lover Nov 8th, 2010 08:09 AM


These are cool game monster meat guides.

Wiffles Nov 8th, 2010 09:46 AM

Meat you can beat o.o

Chojin Nov 8th, 2010 10:39 AM

White blood cells fight infections, brain cells fight feelings.

The difference is that I don't hear white blood cells in my head constantly.

tl;dr i hear voices

MarioRPG Nov 8th, 2010 12:34 PM

Pub Lover that is awesome. Like... way awesome.

Also Chojin this is why you shouldn't take hallucinogens. Unless you are serious in which case not good.

Fathom Zero Nov 8th, 2010 12:42 PM

drink scope

Guitar Woman Nov 8th, 2010 12:43 PM

Quote:

you shouldn't take hallucinogens.
Directly un-follow this advice at all opportunities

Guitar Woman Nov 8th, 2010 12:48 PM

Unless it's datura or DPH, but those are technically hallucinogens in the same way sucking a dick technically constitutes protein intake

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 8th, 2010 01:37 PM

I saw this guy the other day with a tapout shirt who looked like he was full of protein.

Kitsa Nov 8th, 2010 04:39 PM

I've never really figured out what that tapout shit is all about.

Mockery Nov 8th, 2010 05:10 PM

Due to thread trolling and some asinine PMs, I'm sorry to inform you all that Microshock will not only not be participating in the Secret Santa event, but he won't be participating in anything on the I-Mockery forums anymore. Farewell, chump.

:aok

Zomboid Nov 8th, 2010 05:19 PM

Aw, shucks! I bet he was so close to turning it all around and suddenly maturing, too.

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 8th, 2010 05:21 PM

Bad times

Mockery Nov 8th, 2010 05:23 PM

:pagebrak

Mockery Nov 8th, 2010 05:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zomboid (Post 703331)
Aw, shucks! I bet he was so close to turning it all around and suddenly maturing, too.

I know. It was really hard to ban him after his recent comments, but with great power, comes great responsibility. :tear

Sam Nov 8th, 2010 05:46 PM

A TRUE LEGEND HAS NOW FOREVER VANISHED FROM THE I-MOCKERY LANDSCAPE. :tear

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 8th, 2010 05:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 703324)
I've never really figured out what that tapout shit is all about.


Its about tapping out. Folks call it MMA now. I still prefer cagefighting.

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 8th, 2010 05:53 PM

I came up with this pun and wrote it on my notebook. Then I almost called a customer it.

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 8th, 2010 05:53 PM

Agatha Crispy.

Esuohlim Nov 8th, 2010 06:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mockery (Post 703330)
Due to thread trolling and some asinine PMs, I'm sorry to inform you all that Microshock will not only not be participating in the Secret Santa event, but he won't be participating in anything on the I-Mockery forums anymore. Farewell, chump

I was all primed to comment that this news was a micro-shock, but I remembered that I'm not on a pregnant mom forum where people post lol emoticons at terrible jokes to be nice

I have 15,000 posts on that forum too :picklehat

Kitsa Nov 8th, 2010 09:51 PM

I just realized that when I'm talking to someone and they start a lot of sentences with "Actually...", I do like the Willie-spambot-edit thing in my head and all I hear after that is "I AM AN ASS I AM AN ASS I AM AN ASS".

:/

Fathom Zero Nov 8th, 2010 10:14 PM

A three-hour nap and a nightmare changed my entire day.

Pentegarn Nov 9th, 2010 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mockery (Post 703330)
Due to thread trolling and some asinine PMs, I'm sorry to inform you all that Microshock will not only not be participating in the Secret Santa event, but he won't be participating in anything on the I-Mockery forums anymore. Farewell, chump.

Aw Rog, I didn't know you got my name. That was exactly what I wanted for Christmas. How did you know?

Sam Nov 9th, 2010 01:18 AM

I THOUGHT NOOB WAS BACK BUT IT WAS JUST A SPAMMER BUMPING AN OLD THREAD. :tear

Mockery Nov 9th, 2010 01:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pentegarn (Post 703367)
Aw Rog, I didn't know you got my name. That was exactly what I wanted for Christmas. How did you know?

Running this site gives me great powers during Secret Santa events.

p.s. Even though you just received your gift early from me, you still have to buy somebody a Secret Santa gift.

Zhukov Nov 9th, 2010 01:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 703336)
Its about tapping out. Folks call it MMA now. I still prefer cagefighting.

Isn't tapping out what you do when you are losing a fight?

I thought tapout was a brand name associated with the fighting. All the lumpen-scum that live here all started wearing this tapout crap just out of nowhere. One day it was G-Unit and then suddenly it's Tapout.

Fathom Zero Nov 9th, 2010 01:58 AM

eww

Sam Nov 9th, 2010 02:13 AM

DON'T WORRY THEY'LL GO BACK TO KOALA BEARS OR KANGAROOS OR UNICORNS OR WHATEVER INHABIT THE MAGICAL FANTASY LAND YOU LIVE IN.

Fathom Zero Nov 9th, 2010 02:26 AM

unicocks

kahljorn Nov 9th, 2010 02:58 AM

YOU GOT COCKS AND ASS SEX ON THE BRAIN SON

THATS BAD YOU CAN GET BRAIN DISEASE


ROGER HAD A SIT DOWN WItH MICROSHOCKS MOM BEfORE HE BANNED HIM. HIS MOM WAS ALL, "I THINK THAT IF YOU CAN"T FOLLOW THE RULES OF THE GAME THEN MAYBE YOU DON"T DESERVE TO PLAY. I'VE LOOKED AT THE WAY YOUVE BEEN ACTING AND IM DISAPPOINTED IN YOU. I THINK THIS IS BEST FOR EVERYONE"

Fathom Zero Nov 9th, 2010 04:55 AM

http://www.maglite.com/product.asp?psc=6DCELL

Can this honestly be used for anything besides bludgeoning people?

Zhukov Nov 9th, 2010 07:26 AM

It's also a torch. I used to have one similar to that when I was a security guard, I held it back to front like Mulder does.

MLE Nov 9th, 2010 07:56 AM

it doesn't look flammable.

Pub Lover Nov 9th, 2010 08:17 AM

"A torch which uses fire as its light-source is often called a "burning torch", to distinguish from the modern use of the word "torch" to mean "flashlight" in all English speaking countries outside North America."

Kitsa Nov 9th, 2010 08:18 AM

oh, British Commonwealth, when will you ever learn.

Pub Lover Nov 9th, 2010 08:18 AM

The wikipedia page reads to me like it is rolling its eyes. :eek

Pub Lover Nov 9th, 2010 08:19 AM

My spellchecker flags flashlight as incorrect. :eek

Pub Lover Nov 9th, 2010 08:20 AM

Also spellchecker, so yeah. Not the most useful feature. :eek

Pub Lover Nov 9th, 2010 08:20 AM

:pagebrak

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 9th, 2010 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 703375)
Isn't tapping out what you do when you are losing a fight?

I thought tapout was a brand name associated with the fighting. All the lumpen-scum that live here all started wearing this tapout crap just out of nowhere. One day it was G-Unit and then suddenly it's Tapout.


Hahahahaha. That's awful. Also, that is what they do when they're losing the fight. I feel like people wearing TAPOUT are tapping out to the fashion industry.

I'd like to see an old codger that lives in a hill confront someone wearing a tapout shift and regail him the deplorable time the well tapped out. No one had water for weeks. Myrtie died from the dehydration. Cousin Skeeter fell asleep in the well basin waiting for the water to tap back on. Cousin skeeter died of a water overdose in her sleep.

kahljorn Nov 9th, 2010 09:18 AM

we all got syphillus that year

Wiffles Nov 9th, 2010 09:19 AM

Flashlight term is confusing. It could be confused for a camera flash. Which flashes and is a light.
Torch would be confused for some flaming stick that you see on dungeon walls.

It should be called Battery-powered-portable-Handheld-illumination-device. ^_^

Zhukov Nov 9th, 2010 09:44 AM

MMA and Tapout and UFC and all that shit is crap.

All it means is that the people that glare at me on my way to and from work everyday, and who are most likely conspiring to steal my wallet/life, are more likely to have huge muscles thanks to protein shakes and whey.

I'll have to start carrying a torch for defense.

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 9th, 2010 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 703404)
we all got syphillus that year

Syphillids on it. What's that you say?
Syphillids on it. Oh man no way!
Syphillids on it or else your gonna blow your top.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 703411)
MMA and Tapout and UFC and all that shit is crap.

All it means is that the people that glare at me on my way to and from work everyday, and who are most likely conspiring to steal my wallet/life, are more likely to have huge muscles thanks to protein shakes and whey.

I'll have to start carrying a torch for defense.

and a pitchfork.

Wiffles Nov 9th, 2010 11:02 AM

Is the urban jungle of Tasmania really that dangerous? From what you describe it, it sounds like skid row o.o

Esuohlim Nov 9th, 2010 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 703393)
"A torch which uses fire as its light-source is often called a "burning torch", to distinguish from the modern use of the word "torch" to mean "flashlight" in all English speaking countries outside North America."

WHAT DO YOU CALL THE FLESHLIGHT OVER THERE THEN?

THE PUN IS LOST

Fathom Zero Nov 9th, 2010 11:48 AM

Torchvag

Fathom Zero Nov 9th, 2010 01:41 PM

BE A DEBASERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Sam Nov 9th, 2010 02:23 PM

A FLESHTORCH

Pub Lover Nov 9th, 2010 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 703428)
WHAT DO YOU CALL THE FLESHLIGHT OVER THERE THEN?

We call them Cartwrights after old Admiral Cartwright's revenge. :orgasm :cartwrighthandshake

Mockery Nov 9th, 2010 04:31 PM

OMG HOLIDAY EMOTICONS!

:xmas3:xmas2 :xmas1

The Leader Nov 9th, 2010 05:29 PM

Holy fuck.

captain516 Nov 10th, 2010 12:18 AM


fuck, that's catchy

Fathom Zero Nov 10th, 2010 12:34 AM

@publover69

http://gizmodo.com/5685475/the-power...s-to-spaghetti

:eek

Esuohlim Nov 10th, 2010 11:14 AM

Why is thinkgeek selling 28 products relating to bacon? Bacon-obsession is a nerd stereotype now? So much so that people are willing to buy bacon soap?

It's like they're encouraging these people to finally take showers and they'll still smell gross anyway

kahljorn Nov 10th, 2010 12:17 PM

BACOOONN!!! LOOL

BACON FAD NOT OVER

Zomboid Nov 10th, 2010 03:10 PM

PIEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSS!!!!! CHEESE+PIES= EIPIC WIN!!!LOL!

Tadao Nov 10th, 2010 08:02 PM

Today's Birthdays MLE (27),

Pub Lover Nov 10th, 2010 08:34 PM

Cheese Pies are yummy though. :eek

Pub Lover Nov 10th, 2010 08:34 PM


Pub Lover Nov 10th, 2010 08:35 PM

Guys, that is a bacon and cheese pie. I have some in my fridge. :eek

Pub Lover Nov 10th, 2010 08:36 PM

I do not eat bacon or cheese though because I suck eggs. :eek

Pub Lover Nov 10th, 2010 08:37 PM

That is to say I am Vegan. :eek

Pub Lover Nov 10th, 2010 08:37 PM

:pagebrak

Pub Lover Nov 10th, 2010 08:38 PM

Do vegans suck eggs? :confused

MLE Nov 10th, 2010 08:58 PM

Only if they're ovo-lacto

Kitsa Nov 10th, 2010 10:09 PM

A sick person coughed full in my face, so I guess I'll find out what they had in a week or so :(

In unrelated news, I have a sore throat and am killing it with firewater. Specifically wild turkey.

Shyandquietguy Nov 10th, 2010 10:35 PM

I just realized that due to my obtaining of a blue collar production job, I now have full rights of calling people liberal pinko commie fascists.

Esuohlim Nov 11th, 2010 12:47 AM

THOSE FUCKING COMMIE FASCISTS >:

THOSE FUCKING STRAIGHT-TICKET REPUBLICAN DEMOCRATS >:

THOSE FUCKING RIGHT-HANDED LEFTIES >:

Shyandquietguy Nov 11th, 2010 01:25 AM

Those fucking poofters.

I'll never get tired of saying poofter. :(

kahljorn Nov 11th, 2010 07:32 AM

NOW I WISH I HAD A JOB SO THAT I COULD UNDERSTAND

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 11th, 2010 10:22 AM

I thought this guys name was Druid Fluid but it wasn't. It might have been Drew Blood.

Dimnos Nov 11th, 2010 03:31 PM

Druid Fluid. :lol

Zhukov Nov 11th, 2010 09:03 PM

:lol

In other news, I brought my girlfriend to my mum's house to introduce her, and we stayed the night. While we were brushing our teeth getting ready for bed (at about 1:30am) I heard my little brother getting fucked up the arse by his best friend Lachlan who lives two blocks down.

I had no idea he was gay.

Shyandquietguy Nov 11th, 2010 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 703684)
NOW I WISH I HAD A JOB SO THAT I COULD UNDERSTAND

WHY DON"T YOU GET ONE!

Druid Fluid. Tee hee.

Kitsa Nov 11th, 2010 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 703761)
:lol

In other news, I brought my girlfriend to my mum's house to introduce her, and we stayed the night. While we were brushing our teeth getting ready for bed (at about 1:30am) I heard my little brother getting fucked up the arse by his best friend Lachlan who lives two blocks down.

I had no idea he was gay.


I bet that was an interesting conversation. I had a friend who walked in on his sister orally servicing a guy once. Awkward :(

Shyandquietguy Nov 11th, 2010 09:45 PM

Is his friend an immigrant? Foreigners do that you know. They throw out their weird, creepy vibes and seduce ya' to do horrible, unthought of things.

Pub Lover Nov 12th, 2010 12:35 AM

http://iwdrm.tumblr.com/ Animated gifs. Like a lot of what I see on Tumblr I want to fill this thread with them.

Pub Lover Nov 12th, 2010 12:40 AM

I skidded off a gravel road going down a steep hill and went through a wire fence today. It is the first time I have crashed my car. The line between everything being ok and laying in a field shaking is a lot thinner than I thought. I am telling you about my day, Internet.

Fathom Zero Nov 12th, 2010 12:48 AM

Did you bleed?

Shyandquietguy Nov 12th, 2010 01:36 AM

Wow, you ok? Did it flip or just skid?

If it just skidded, I'll be relieved, but you will be vulnerable on being called a puss by serious car drivers.

Sam Nov 12th, 2010 03:36 AM

DEAR ZHUKOV,

I'M SORRY YOUR BROTHER IS A POOFTER AND YOU HAVE TO HEAR HIS DECADENT ASS SEX.

Wiffles Nov 12th, 2010 04:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 703788)
I skidded off a gravel road going down a steep hill and went through a wire fence today. It is the first time I have crashed my car. The line between everything being ok and laying in a field shaking is a lot thinner than I thought. I am telling you about my day, Internet.

Boyracer!

Zhukov Nov 12th, 2010 07:06 AM

Sam,

Thank you for your kind words.

10,000 Volt Ghost Nov 12th, 2010 05:28 PM

Zhukov, I hope the the toothpaste did not foam in your and your girlfriends mouths while that was going on.

Babs Nov 12th, 2010 05:56 PM

Was there blood?

King Hadas Nov 12th, 2010 07:22 PM

Could it be a misunderstanding? Maybe they were only hanging curtains.

Phoenix Gamma Nov 12th, 2010 11:41 PM


FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCK.


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