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-   -   my ballad with tom jones... (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=23991)

die_coke Feb 20th, 2007 07:19 PM

my ballad with tom jones...
 
Love is like candy on a shelf
(Errm no, love is a chocolate that looks like chocolate, smells like chocolate but when you bite into it, it's shit!)
You want to taste and help yourself
(You want to get laid, end off)
The sweetest things are there for you
(or a none sweet thing for a haggled price)
Help yourself, take a few
Thats what I want you to do.
(Tom is your pimp)
Were always told repeatedly
The very best in life is free
(Yeah but no one wants to sit in a park and get high on the leaking gas main with me)
And if you want to prove its true
Baby Im telling you
This is what you should do
Just help yourself to my lips
(Oh shit, Tom Jones is coming on to me!)
To my arms just say the word, and they are yours
(You'd have to be pretty mental to go out with a girl that only talked to your arms)
Just help yourself to the love,
In my heart your smile has opened up the door
(I'm in a cardiac arrest and on the floor)
The greatest wealth that exists in the world,
Could never buy what I can give
(Sperm on your face, happy meal, rent-a-flick....etc)
Just help yourself to my lips
To my arms, and then lets really start to live
Allllllllll right. yeah
(She just went down on him)
My heart has love enough for two
(He wants a threesome now, greedy bugger)
More than enough for me and you
Im rich with love, a millionaire
Ive so much, its unfair
Why dont you take a share
(Tom's handing out his sperm on street corners)
Just help yourself to my lips
To my arms just say the word, and they are yours
Just help yourself to the love,
In my heart your smile has opened up the door
The greatest wealth that exists in the world
Could never buy what I can give
So help yourself to my lips, to my arms
And then lets really start to live
(Tom is now so giddy from the massive sperm loss he just keeps repeating himself)
Just help yourself to my lips
To my arms just say the word, and they are yours
Just help yourself to the love
In my heart your smile............[fade]

for Starsky }:)

Rez Feb 20th, 2007 10:43 PM

hey guy wassup i bet you're completely out of your mind.

Dole Feb 21st, 2007 07:10 AM

'end of'

GADZOOKS Feb 23rd, 2007 06:39 AM

You should record over the song with your funny comments and post it here! Make sure to sound like a real damn jerk when you do it too!


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