I-Mockery Forum - I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips)

My god, I'm not the only one who collects knives?
I've got a battle axe, too.

Oh right. This is supposed to be about hilarious sex stories...

Raises the question:
Would you make sweet love to a knife?

Ever seen Se7en?

Vanhelm13

Jan 7th, 2008 12:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dirtyxblondexdame (Post 520550)

that sentence - will never get laid, not even in a Mini Cooper.

While I'm at it, I should mention that I'm studying Elvish.

Vanhelm13

Jan 7th, 2008 12:31 AM

Se7en? That's the movie with the 7 sins and morgan freeman throwing a switch blade, right?

dirtyxblondexdame

Jan 7th, 2008 12:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanhelm13 (Post 520558)

While I'm at it, I should mention that I'm studying Elvish.

you're only helping my cause now. stop it, or you will never see boobies again.

Spetsnaz

Jan 7th, 2008 12:32 AM

Yeah. Would you let your girlfriend ( if any ) fuck with that dildo?

Vanhelm13

Jan 7th, 2008 12:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dirtyxblondexdame (Post 520561)

you're only helping my cause now. stop it, or you will never see boobies again.

luckily my girlfriend of 2 years doesn't care.
I also own all 3 lotr movies. Collector's edition, of course.
edit: And are you saying you don't think
"Melethin ce" sounds sexy?

And I seriously doubt my girlfriend ever using any dildo.
Especially a large bladed one.

Spetsnaz

Jan 7th, 2008 12:39 AM

You know what freaks me out, man?

Hobbit sex. Sam and Frodo gettin it on.

Vanhelm13

Jan 7th, 2008 12:40 AM

Oh yeah. Though I'm really tired of the whole frodo-sam "lolgay" thing.
It's amusing the first few times, but seriously, Sam was all about Rosie.
Frodo, though? Total cock muncher.

dirtyxblondexdame

Jan 7th, 2008 12:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanhelm13 (Post 520565)

luckily my girlfriend of 2 years doesn't care.
I also own all 3 lotr movies. Collector's edition, of course.
edit: And are you saying you don't think
"Melethin le" sounds sexy?

And I seriously doubt my girlfriend ever using any dildo.
Especially a large bladed one.

i give a round of applause to your girlfriend. she obviously rocks. my ex was a comic geek, and i put up with it for 3 years. it's rough being 2nd to something.

dirtyxblondexdame

Jan 7th, 2008 12:41 AM

P.S---- all i have to say about LOTR is Viggo = teh hotness.

*droooooooooooooooooool*

executioneer

Jan 7th, 2008 12:42 AM

man i'd volunter for mod dutys but theres no way in f*ck i can be trusted around loveline

at least i dont think so

executioneer

Jan 7th, 2008 12:42 AM

AND PLUS IM TOTALLY A NEWB

Spetsnaz

Jan 7th, 2008 12:42 AM

I could totally pull off a Viggo if I lost ten pounds... Do you think I look fat?

Spetsnaz

Jan 7th, 2008 12:44 AM

Eh. I'd offer my services, but a cry so great would rise up from the masses....

dirtyxblondexdame

Jan 7th, 2008 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evil Dead (Post 520574)

I could totally pull off a Viggo if I lost ten pounds... Do you think I look fat?

NOONE can be Viggo but Viggo <3

did ANYONE see Eastern Promises??? oh my word.

Guitar Woman

Jan 7th, 2008 12:46 AM

considering that you posess none of the qualities chojin listed and are generally a fucking retard I don't think you making the position would be a problem

EDIT: Testing editing button - Esuohlim :lol

Chojin

Jan 7th, 2008 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 161159)

EVERYBODY LETS POST ANGRY JEKR POSTS AS FAS T AS WE CAN SO THIS THREAD GETS 20 PAGES :lol

-willie

IF ONLY YOU KNEW

Spetsnaz

Jan 7th, 2008 12:46 AM

No. I didn't.

Eh, I mostly get compared to Beowulf by my ex... ( Not the new one, the live action Beowulf and Grendel. )

Personally, I don't see how Viggo had ANY sex appeal in G.I. Jane or A History of Violence.

Vanhelm13

Jan 7th, 2008 12:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dirtyxblondexdame (Post 520569)

i give a round of applause to your girlfriend. she obviously rocks. my ex was a comic geek, and i put up with it for 3 years. it's rough being 2nd to something.

Oh she's definitely not second to anything.
Placing your sig-other below something is just cruel.

Chojin

Jan 7th, 2008 12:47 AM

if it becomes clear that we need more moderation after more newbs come in we'll hold a vote or something :o

Vanhelm13

Jan 7th, 2008 12:47 AM

Is eastern promises the one with the nude fight scene?

dirtyxblondexdame

Jan 7th, 2008 12:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanhelm13 (Post 520582)

Oh she's definitely not second to anything.
Placing your sig-other below something is just cruel.

and THAT is why i am single. untill i find a guy that won't put comics or booze or drugs or anything else before me, i wanna be alone.

Spetsnaz

Jan 7th, 2008 12:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dirtyxblondexdame (Post 520586)

and THAT is why i am single. untill i find a guy that won't put comics or booze or drugs or anything else before me, i wanna be alone.

Thats so fucking selfish.

Vanhelm13

Jan 7th, 2008 12:52 AM

That's understandable.
I think I got really lucky. I've known her since 7th grade (in 10th now) and we were just good friends at first..It..just.you know..Evolved from there.

dirtyxblondexdame

Jan 7th, 2008 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evil Dead (Post 520588)

Thats so fucking selfish.

apparently i have a sign on my head that says "walk all over me!! i love to take abuse!!"

but no longer.

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