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-   -   NHL 2013-2014 Season (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69708959)

Tadao Feb 7th, 2014 11:39 AM

I would have been happier if it was anyone but Regher to make the goal :lol

It's good though, he made 1000 games 2 games ago, it broke our losing streak before break and it was done in overtime. Good for him the big lunk. I just have an unnatural hate for him. I think it was a bad idea to trade pancake for someone so old.

Kitsa Feb 7th, 2014 03:19 PM

I don't know much about Regher.

Jody Shelly takes us in the stick room to show us sticks are Serious Bidness (and acts like it's the first time he ever saw the place)


Tadao Feb 7th, 2014 04:01 PM

Lol I wish the background music was Stick Boy.

Kitsa Feb 7th, 2014 06:13 PM

That background music was annoying as all hell, they always do that

Kitsa Feb 10th, 2014 06:18 PM

This was on NHL's facebook:

"NHL 24/7
Here are the chances of where Calgary Flames will finish for each position at the end of the season.

(The Percentage is based of on how many wins/losses, how many games played/left, who they play and how many games they won/lost and how many games they have left, etc.)

1st Pace: Mathematically Impossible
2nd Place: Mathematically Impossible
3rd Place: Mathematically Impossible
4th Place: 0.0000058%
5th Place: 0.0043%
6th Place: 0.0017%
7th Place: 0.734%
8th Place: 2.47%
9th Place: 14.7%
10th Place: 21.37%
11th Place: 28.6%
12th Place: 20.16%
13th Place: 2.22%
14th Place: 0.07%

Where will they finish at the end of the year?"

Tadao Feb 19th, 2014 12:48 PM

Kitsa Feb 20th, 2014 10:01 AM

#1, I love that there are almost 15 minutes of footage.

#2, goalies are a little psycho.

#3, <3 hexty.

Kitsa Feb 24th, 2014 10:06 PM

Tyutin's on IR. Something must have happened at the Olympics.

10,000 Volt Ghost Feb 26th, 2014 03:35 AM

yay. fuck you carolina.

AChimp Feb 27th, 2014 10:26 AM

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 1st, 2014 03:02 PM

Have a huge blues boner now.

Tadao Mar 2nd, 2014 02:22 PM

I haven't watched a game since the Olympics and we've won all 3. I don't know why. :(

AChimp Mar 4th, 2014 11:32 AM

Ugh... Buffalo. Jets needed yall to win. :(

Kitsa Mar 4th, 2014 07:37 PM

Holy shit, Jackets are killing it in the 1st against Dallas. 3 goals in 15 minutes. Hope they can keep up this momentum.

AChimp Mar 4th, 2014 11:39 PM

We lost in overtime. :(

At least we get a point! Thanks for beating Dallas :)


Kitsa Mar 5th, 2014 07:25 AM

The Bobrovsky-Foligno postgame hug is now famous. People demand it like NOW HUG DAMN YOU.

Tadao Mar 5th, 2014 12:28 PM

Man since I haven't watched a game we have won every time. I'm not watching a game until we lose or I go to the St Pattys game.

Kitsa Mar 5th, 2014 06:35 PM

You just got Gaborik. He's good and a crazy-fast skater, but I think he's slow coming off that last injury.

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 6th, 2014 09:27 AM

Hopefully all this wheelin and dealin pays off.

Trade deadline this year has actually been exciting.

Tadao Mar 6th, 2014 01:34 PM

Broken collar bone? Ouch. :( I guess I just have to trust that the kings know what they are doing. lol

Tadao Mar 6th, 2014 05:05 PM

Wait, so Ohio is mad at Carter because they traded him to the Kings and the Kings won the cup, or is it something else?

Kitsa Mar 6th, 2014 08:38 PM

Columbus is a lot like Montreal in that regard, someone gets traded and we're all YOU'RE DEAD TO US YOU FUCKING FUCK

Tadao Mar 6th, 2014 10:02 PM

Eheheheheh poor guy. It's not even his fault. :lol

Kitsa Mar 6th, 2014 10:55 PM

6-1, ouuuuuccchhh :(

Kitsa Mar 8th, 2014 11:50 PM


AChimp Mar 9th, 2014 11:41 AM

One of the finest examples of Jokinen.

Kitsa Mar 9th, 2014 03:16 PM

Weird-looking dude. And animated, that makes it even better.

We kicked Nashville's ass in a shutout last night, which made me feel good. I haven't forgotten the last time I was at Nationwide when the Predators came and there were two loud backwoodsy women in Preadators sweaters, standing up howling WHOOOEEEEE, GIT EM BOYS

Kitsa Mar 10th, 2014 09:21 PM


Bad night.

Kitsa Mar 10th, 2014 09:22 PM

They cancelled the game :(

Tadao Mar 10th, 2014 09:29 PM

really? wow is there a huge storm over on the east?

Kitsa Mar 10th, 2014 09:50 PM

No, the Stars center has a heart condition and he had some sort of event on the bench- it was freaky as hell, there was utter confusion and they didn't get play stopped for several minutes, they thought at first that a linesman was down and then we saw the Stars coach and someone else literally running into the back with a player, didn't even wait for a medic...play was delayed for quite some time and then eventually the game was called. It was weird seeing them ordering all players and staff to leave.

Kitsa Mar 11th, 2014 12:03 AM

Peaverly stable

Tadao Mar 11th, 2014 12:24 AM

Wow that sucks, I wonder what happened to him. Kinda odd to be fine and then just collapse. Sounds like a silent killer type of thing.

We just won 8 games in a row.

Kitsa Mar 11th, 2014 07:52 AM

Cool, almost caught up to our streak then :P

From what I understand, this was just diagnosed earlier in the season and has been plaguing him on and off. Apparently he just collapsed on the bench, they had to do chest compressions and defib him and everything. Both team's doctors worked on him and then they got him out of there.

I've never seen play suspended that long since the Malarchuk footage and I've never seen a game just completely called like that. They said that his Dallas teammates were rattled as were both coaches (Richards used to coach him too) and that it would not be fair to continue. It looks as if they are going to make up the game after the last regular season game.

Kitsa Mar 12th, 2014 09:23 AM

We beat the Redwings pretty handily. They were decimated by injuries and the guy in goal was only on his 9th NHL game, but I'll take the win because I fucking hate the Redwings.

I was reading the comments about the Stars player that collapsed and there are all these idiots going GO RED WINGS and it's like what in the everloving fuck do the Red Wings have to do with any of this? This is why people hate Red Wings fans.

Kitsa Mar 12th, 2014 09:27 AM

Also, at home games they almost always cut away to the concession stand between periods and it's usually something gross, like someone turning big slabs of bacon-on-a-stick on a revolving griddle, but the last few times it has been these amazing looking brownies that are covered with chocolate glaze to look like pucks with a Jackets logo on them. And BY DAMN I WILL HAVE ONE.

AChimp Mar 15th, 2014 08:18 AM

UGH.... six straight losses. Our season is done. :tear

Tadao Mar 15th, 2014 01:49 PM

Winning streak is over, get to watch the ducks at kings game tonight thenoff for green beer on mon v prairie dogs.

Edit : Oh we have seat 116 behind visitors net WHOOOO HOOOOO

Kitsa Mar 16th, 2014 12:33 PM

Love seats where you can see shots on goal directly.

We beat Minnesota last night, I believe in OT, dunno, was tired and didn't watch.

Tadao Mar 18th, 2014 12:50 PM

Fucking Regher. :(

Tadao Mar 18th, 2014 09:22 PM

Kitsa Mar 19th, 2014 07:32 AM

Aw. If only my name were Nathan :lol

Tadao Mar 19th, 2014 11:50 AM

You'll always be Nathan to us.

Kitsa Mar 21st, 2014 09:58 AM

Was happy for the Montreal win last night. Their fans are always so hostile.

Kitsa Mar 21st, 2014 08:44 PM

Nash-Bobrovsky fight? What the fuck planet am I on?

"I'm their hero now, bitch!"

Kitsa Mar 21st, 2014 08:59 PM

Oh, this is fucking hilarious.

Nash was standing ahead of Bob to his left, not looking at him. Bob reached out and punched him hard in the calf with the goalie stick. Completely instigated it, which is unfathomably out of character. Nash went down, got up, turned around, Bob made a menacing gesture. Nash charged him and was promptly swarmed by all remaining Jackets.

After that, every Jacket seems to be trying to instigate individually, usually the same way. Calvert just did it again, they keep knocking Nash on his ass. Jackets just scored and Rangers scored like 30 seconds later. What a game! Wish I was there for this one.

Kitsa Mar 21st, 2014 09:51 PM

LOL, what did I tell you, Columbus fucking hates anyone who gets traded. YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD TO US. Especially since Nash asked to be traded. His tribute even got booed.

Tadao Mar 22nd, 2014 12:06 PM

ahahaahahhahah wtf this is crazy

Kitsa Mar 22nd, 2014 05:28 PM

For starters, Bob was baiting him.

In the first period, Nash had his back to Bob and was crowding the crease. Bob extended his stick and gave him a sharp poke in the calf, and he went down. Nash looked for a penalty and got nothing. I think he also did a slash that first period.

The really big one happened just after the Nash goal that was waved off. He made to pick up his stick and Bob made to use his own stick to hoist it toward him. Just as Nash reached out, Bob gave his stick a shove and sent Nash's stick sliding just out of reach. Nash jumped up and gave Bob a hard shove in the throat and then all hell broke loose. By all reports, Bob was laughing. Jackets came flying out of nowhere and started pounding.

Then later, Matt Calvert fought Nash again, and did a very similar calf-jab move to knock him down. It was nuts.

So yeah, even though I'm a diehard Jackets fan and Bob's our guy, I have to admit here that Bob was being a dick, which was highly unusual for him. He and Nash both usually go the hardworker, above-that-shit route. It was taunting and it was dick moves out of Bob left and right, and it would almost have to just be some sort of assertion of dominance, like, "My team now, bitch."

I don't know. Guys are stupid. I was mainly just sort of amazed it happened at all. I wonder who gave Bob villain lessons.

Kitsa Mar 22nd, 2014 05:32 PM

See it all here

Tadao Mar 23rd, 2014 12:22 PM

lol that was pretty funny actually.

Kitsa Mar 23rd, 2014 04:45 PM

What I saw was like the hockey equivalent of that guy who stops to let you in the car and then lurches forward a few feet when you reach for the door handle. That's what Bob was doing to Nash all night, and then the guy got his ass kicked for getting mad.

AChimp Mar 25th, 2014 08:44 AM


Kitsa Mar 25th, 2014 05:17 PM

Well, that's one way for Dallas to win, lol.

Tadao Mar 25th, 2014 05:49 PM

At first I thought it was in the nuts and he wasn't wearing a cup, which would be suicide in hockey.

AChimp Mar 25th, 2014 06:09 PM

On TV it looked like he had dislocated his shoulder. :(

Kitsa Mar 25th, 2014 10:25 PM

It did.

In other news, YEAHHHHHHHH, eat it redwings

Tadao Mar 25th, 2014 11:49 PM

Oh man, playoff slots are already cliched. 3 in w and 1 in the east. It's crunch time.

Tadao Mar 29th, 2014 03:07 PM


AChimp Mar 30th, 2014 09:30 AM

Thanks for beating us. We need to tank the rest of the season to get a good draft pick!

Tadao Mar 30th, 2014 12:03 PM

Your welcome my friend.

AChimp Apr 1st, 2014 06:55 PM

Blew a 4-0 lead.

I hate hockey.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2014 09:06 PM

Going to see the game against the dogs, almost the same seats as last time. Different results I hope.

Kitsa Apr 1st, 2014 10:27 PM

We blew a lead too, against the Avalanche.

On the upside, us only getting a point may have saved Coach Richards from being ragemurdered by Patrick Roy.

Kitsa Apr 1st, 2014 10:40 PM

btw, I don't know any player they cut away to drinking from a Gatorade bottle more than Sergei Bobrovsky. I swear, every fucking time play is called. I don't know if they want it out there that he's the thirstiest guy in the NHL or what.

Kitsa Apr 4th, 2014 09:58 AM

Great win last night, shut out Philly on their own home ice, which is always good...hate them nearly as much as I hate Detroit. Bob skated in, everyone booed him, and he did this loop with his trademark stick in the air clap and all of a sudden they were all cheering him. Cult of Bob!

Tadao Apr 5th, 2014 01:00 PM

If the playoffs started today


Blue Jackets are still in there.

AChimp Apr 6th, 2014 12:49 AM

All that matters now is making sure the Leafs end up in 9th place.

Colonel Flagg Apr 9th, 2014 12:41 PM

After the horrific start to this season, at least the Flyers have made it to the playoffs. Now I hope they don't draw the Bruins in the 1st round.

Tadao Apr 9th, 2014 02:38 PM

As it is, we are up against either the mighty fucks or the sharks.

CBJ still in the game, I've felt bad for 10k all season. :(

Kitsa Apr 12th, 2014 10:07 PM

We're up against the penguins, fuck our collective lives

Colonel Flagg Apr 13th, 2014 10:05 AM

Penguins is practically chickens.

Tadao Apr 13th, 2014 09:25 PM

NHL Bracket


Bracket name : I-Mockery
Password : whitepig

Colonel Flagg Apr 13th, 2014 09:41 PM

I'm in, again.

Kitsa Apr 14th, 2014 09:56 AM

I always feel like such a fucking grandma when I do the bracket thing. I always forget that "Entry" means "your name" and then I sit here wondering why the fucking thing won't save

Kitsa Apr 14th, 2014 10:09 AM

I hope columbus proves me wrong and goes all the way. I'm just happy they're in the playoffs, really.

Colonel Flagg Apr 14th, 2014 12:25 PM

This is the first year I'm picking realistically. The Flyers are not going all the way. :(

Tadao Apr 14th, 2014 01:11 PM


Colonel Flagg Apr 14th, 2014 03:57 PM

If it makes you feel any better, neither are the Kings.

Kitsa Apr 14th, 2014 06:08 PM

Yeah, I had the Kings lasting about as long as my beloved Jackets :(

Colonel Flagg Apr 14th, 2014 07:56 PM

For the second time in my I-Mock history I am picking my most hated team to win the championship. With my usual luck, they'll go 4-and-out. :(

Kitsa Apr 14th, 2014 08:15 PM

I fucking hate the Redwings, and I fucking hate Philly, and I fucking hate Boston. Any year they don't win is a good year for me.

Colonel Flagg Apr 14th, 2014 10:11 PM

We just disagree on a few minor details. ;)

Kitsa Apr 14th, 2014 10:18 PM

They're just such greasy players :( And a history of that being encouraged.

Tadao Apr 14th, 2014 10:52 PM

Like Vancouver but with a skill set?

Tadao Apr 14th, 2014 10:57 PM

For me it's more of a Philly fan in LA thing, they are some of the most disgusting idiots I've come across. It's like a basketball game. Just because Kings fans don't beat you up or even talk shit to you at the bar give you freedom to act like a fucking drunk asshole.

Kitsa Apr 15th, 2014 12:04 AM

There is definitely that. Philly fans, Pens fans and especially fucking BOSTON fans are the WORST at Nationwide. Just fucking drunk sloppy assholes.

Colonel Flagg Apr 15th, 2014 09:51 AM

You guys should see the football nitwits. They make the hockey imbeciles look like Albert Einstein in comparison.

Tadao Apr 15th, 2014 10:59 AM

Basketball is the American worst. Soccer is the worlds worst :lol

Colonel Flagg Apr 15th, 2014 03:14 PM

In Philly it's Football first. Basketball ... well, it's tough to find anyone who cares enough to be a dick.

Tadao Apr 15th, 2014 04:31 PM

LA may have had you beat when we had the Raiders. Holly shit that team brought out the worst in us.

Kitsa Apr 16th, 2014 12:30 PM

Got my Jackets shirt on, got my Bobrovsky-Foligno hug mug ready, got my Jackets purse. All done up like a puckbunny up in this shit.

Colonel Flagg Apr 16th, 2014 02:48 PM

Show those Penguins who's boss!

Kitsa Apr 16th, 2014 02:52 PM

I unfortunately doubt that'll happen, but we'll give it a go. I hate that Horton is out :(

Colonel Flagg Apr 16th, 2014 03:00 PM

Kitsa Apr 16th, 2014 07:06 PM

ugh, I am as nervous for them as if I were on the fucking roster myself.

Bob with a beard never stops being funny.

Kitsa Apr 17th, 2014 07:05 AM

Started out strong, ate it in the 3rd

Son of a bitch.

Colonel Flagg Apr 17th, 2014 01:49 PM

Rangers can suck it.

Tadao Apr 17th, 2014 07:33 PM


Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 769853)
I unfortunately doubt that'll happen, but we'll give it a go. I hate that Horton is out :(

I had CBJ going pretty far until I read this and was all hmmmmm, maybe I should rethink this. :(

Colonel Flagg Apr 17th, 2014 09:55 PM

And, the Flyers gave as good as they got, until they get sloppy in the third period, take a stupid double-minor penalty and give up 2 goals in less than a minute. Situation normal on the road against the Rangers this year.

Oh well ....

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