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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

executioneer Jun 2nd, 2008 05:29 AM

how much wood would a woodchuck suck if a woodchuck could suck wood

Dixie Jun 2nd, 2008 05:33 AM

Well Jeeves sends me to Century Media's site when I ask him what heavy metal is, so he sucks.

pac-man Jun 2nd, 2008 07:46 AM

Jeeves is a corporate tool.

Fat_Hippo Jun 2nd, 2008 11:50 AM

Very true. When I asked him if he was stupid he gave me car insurance and airline tickets.

Tadao Jun 2nd, 2008 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 558672)
Lampooning a decade I was actually there for would be a fantstic idea!

Get to work you slacker.

HickMan Jun 2nd, 2008 06:30 PM

It's only a matter of time that Cracked.com makes a top 10 list about how REDIC jeeves is.

Fathom Zero Jun 3rd, 2008 12:52 AM

Should I get the hearse that's right down the road for $3750? I mean, I could talk the guy down a bit, but gas is gonna be fuck awful.

executioneer Jun 3rd, 2008 12:54 AM

are you gonna turn it into a ecto-1 replica

Fathom Zero Jun 3rd, 2008 01:09 AM

I've actually been thinking about it.

pac-man Jun 3rd, 2008 02:29 AM

There shouldn't be a moment's hesitation. Buy teh hearse.

Misdemonar Jun 3rd, 2008 02:41 AM

AW FUCK

executioneer Jun 3rd, 2008 02:55 AM

just make sure you get the ghost vacuum, then you can vacuum up ghosts when you're driving

pac-man Jun 3rd, 2008 03:27 AM

Ugh... that game sucked so many bags of dicks it's staggering.

ElPila666 Jun 3rd, 2008 08:23 AM


HickMan Jun 3rd, 2008 09:53 PM


liquidstatik Jun 3rd, 2008 11:53 PM

*YAAAAAWNWNNWN*

Fathom Zero Jun 4th, 2008 12:06 AM


Guitar Woman Jun 4th, 2008 02:39 AM

I'm wearing a cape

Esuohlim Jun 4th, 2008 03:07 AM

I AM WEARING MY GLASSES

Esuohlim Jun 4th, 2008 03:08 AM

GO AHEAD LAUGH AT THE NERD

executioneer Jun 4th, 2008 04:46 AM

i got headphones on

what is this the what are you wearing thread

no it isnt

T-Rex Jun 4th, 2008 05:11 AM

Happy the first hot air balloon flight day!

HickMan Jun 4th, 2008 05:14 AM

what were you listening to willie no this isnt the music forum but idc (I don't care)

HickMan Jun 4th, 2008 05:15 AM

Idk (I don't Kare)

executioneer Jun 4th, 2008 05:23 AM

i was listning to that pork and beans youtube and then i listened to a youtube that was linked on cuteoverload dot com

i should probably listen to something else or take them off, theyre kinda itching me

executioneer Jun 4th, 2008 05:24 AM

haha maybe i'll play some tf2

T-Rex Jun 4th, 2008 05:25 AM

pthalatswHia (points to himself and looks around to see who Hickman is adressing)

T-Rex Jun 4th, 2008 05:33 AM

New Guitarage just came in the post. It looks like this, holla holla.


Tadao Jun 4th, 2008 01:35 PM

Why not a hollow body? Do they make hollows?

Fathom Zero Jun 4th, 2008 03:01 PM

I'd cut off one of my fingers to see Crystal Castles.

HickMan Jun 4th, 2008 03:48 PM


Pub Lover Jun 4th, 2008 05:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by T-Rex (Post 559073)
If you could quit your job right now what would you go into

My profession of choice would be Ban-happy Internet Forum Moderator.

It is, in my opinion, unlikely that I would need more than five minutes at this task to reach my current life goals.

Guitar Woman Jun 4th, 2008 08:19 PM

NOW JIMMY

DO YA WANT AN EXPLOSION, NOW

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 4th, 2008 09:15 PM

So doing some shopping today, walked past a 50's diner in the mall. They're playing Barbara ann(bar-bar-bar, barbara ann) First and only thing came to my mind was Surf Ninjas.

Grislygus Jun 4th, 2008 09:55 PM

So, about a year ago an old woman was burnt to a crisp by the kilns in the sculpture studio at the college.

Apparently, our college president told a faculty member shortly afterwards how hilarious it was that "they found fat on the floor instead of fabric".

She should post here, I think

Fathom Zero Jun 4th, 2008 09:57 PM

******salad

Grislygus Jun 4th, 2008 09:58 PM

What exactly does a ******salad look like

Pub Lover Jun 4th, 2008 10:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 559164)
T-Rex stop making threads I am as serious as a heart attack


Quote:

Originally Posted by Cosmo Electrolux (Post 559167)
Quote:

Originally Posted by mburbank (Post 559065)
c'mon, you guys, you are talking about The Jeez. Show a little respect, for Christ's sake.

I TOTALLY got that, Max, and I'm sure I'm the only one. :picklehat

Hands up anyone that didn't get it. >:

Grislygus Jun 4th, 2008 10:16 PM

Proceeding to take Christ's name in vain? Same joke as "watch your fucking language, goddamnit"?

Grislygus Jun 4th, 2008 10:27 PM


Grislygus Jun 4th, 2008 10:28 PM

****** caesar salad

pac-man Jun 4th, 2008 10:35 PM

****** salad man
http://youtube.com/watch?v=077UtUWGQOA

HickMan Jun 5th, 2008 12:18 PM

Now that's just silly

Pub Lover Jun 5th, 2008 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by T-Rex (Post 559257)
You can be as serious as you want. He made a topic that you didn’t like, so you whine about it. My heart bleeds for you. A forum is interactive. An extra topic just allows an extra opportunity for conversation, forgive me, I thought that was significant. Instead of taking your little internet job so seriously, maybe you should ask yourself the real question. Why aren’t you sitting down and colouring? That’s what children do, they colour. I bet you’re really good at it too.

The boards are slow. Without new topics shit is mad boring son. We have topics like “Fucking sharks” and “Happy birthday to some guy” and “Cartoons I’d like to ****”. Most of them have no relevant content. All of a sudden “I like Oreos” is crossing the line. Fuck you. Either it's all okay, or none of it's okay Milhouse. Please, explain to me how this thread has done you wrong. You dunce.

I'll probably be banned for this because I've seen how something not even directed at you can cause you to get your panties all bunched up. You can ban T-rex but I haven't broken any rules. You could rationalise it to the "being annoying" one, but if that was such a crime, why would there be an ignore list? Who cares? Oh I forgot, this is all as serious as a heart attack.

>:

:lol Now if everything this guy posted was like the above, he wouldn't be a useless sack of crap. :eek

Also, he's pointing at the fucking cartoons thread as if that was acceptable. I damnwell told you to bin that shit, Mister S. >:

Esuohlim Jun 5th, 2008 01:41 PM

LOOKS LIKE I HIT A NERVE :rolleyes :lol

Pub Lover Jun 5th, 2008 05:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MattJack (Post 559295)
God damn I have to get use to everyone being sensitive on I-Mockery now, which now includes most "vets."

Fuck the vets, MJ. Tear this place apart! >:
Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 559312)
Quote:

Originally Posted by Spambot
Hope sincerely to have glad and long term business relationship with you.
If you are interested in our products and have any problem, welcome to contact
us. we will be honest to answer your all problem .and welcome to test our honesty.

If you're taking the time to learn BBcode, maybe get a little English in there as well?

Saying that, I do like the idea of someone being testably honest to answer my all problem. ;(

MattJack Jun 5th, 2008 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 559101)
I'd cut off one of my fingers to see Crystal Castles.

My g/f seen em not too long ago.

She said they were amazing, I didn't know you dug em man. Their album is pretty hot :blackamericanidoljudge

MattJack Jun 5th, 2008 06:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 559313)
Fuck the vets, MJ. Tear this place apart! >:


I don't want to become the new Helm (not that I could :( ), but I'm going to keep teasing and being a sarcastic di*k.

And I want people to do the same with me.

BUT YES SIR, YES SIR

pac-man Jun 5th, 2008 07:16 PM



"This just in...go to Hell!"

Grislygus Jun 5th, 2008 08:01 PM

Hell, the last time I picked a fight was when I drew Colonel Flagg preparing to fuck a dog, need to rile someone else up one last time before I ditch for summer


AND YES PUB I SWEAR TO GOD JESUS CHRIST BEELZEBUB YOU WILL GET THE VIDEO BEFORE I GO

Grislygus Jun 5th, 2008 08:03 PM

Fuck it, gonna be whole new retards when I get back anyway

Misdemonar Jun 5th, 2008 08:24 PM

ill still be here

liquidstatik Jun 5th, 2008 08:43 PM

w/e girlygus :x

Esuohlim Jun 6th, 2008 03:30 AM

Sup dudes

Esuohlim Jun 6th, 2008 03:34 AM

NEVERMIND FORGET IT

I HAVE TO GET UP EARLY IN THE MORNING AND I NEED A RESTFUL SLUMBER 8(

Esuohlim Jun 6th, 2008 03:38 AM

And there's nobody else online but pac-man and Sacks :rolleyes

Sacks is all right but that other guy's a f*ucker :x

executioneer Jun 6th, 2008 04:02 AM

;_;

pac-man Jun 6th, 2008 04:16 AM



"I've never liked that little wiener Milhouse" - Homer Simpson

Misdemonar Jun 6th, 2008 04:58 AM

man i hate those simspons

pac-man Jun 6th, 2008 05:07 AM

Quote:

man i hate those simspons


Ladies and gentlemen, I've been to Vietnam, Iraq, and Afghanistan, and I can say without hyperbole that this is a million times worse than all of them put together.

Guitar Woman Jun 6th, 2008 12:22 PM

so I'm working at a church to re-organize their computer stuff. So far the funniest things I've found are help manuals for Laserjet II series printers and a copy of Windows 3.1. :D

Guitar Woman Jun 6th, 2008 01:40 PM

Holy shit, they had strawberry syrup in their fridge. That is unbelievable. :picklehat

also I get to work the front desk now and they have a security hub on the wall with high quality cameras and an intercom and everything :picklehat


I'm waiting for a bum to come by so I can pretend I'm jesus.

Tadao Jun 6th, 2008 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr. Boogie (Post 559411)
So Barr would be stealing votes from Republicans the way Nader steal them from the Democrats?

Godamit people! Votes do not count, how many times does this have to be proven to you guys :(

Fathom Zero Jun 6th, 2008 04:14 PM

Hold onto that girl, MattJack, she's a winner in my book.

MattJack Jun 6th, 2008 04:23 PM

Ri rearry rike rer

You wanna hit up some GTA? Cause I'm about to enjoy my half day of work by running over people

Fathom Zero Jun 6th, 2008 04:49 PM

I just got back from work and I'm about to sleep. I also have stuff to do and my bro is hoggin' on the 360. I also need a new mic. Which I should have got today back from my trip to the bank. But I didn't. Agh.

I'll be on tomorrow and definitely Tuesday night.

Pub Lover Jun 6th, 2008 05:25 PM

It's snowing. :(

Guitar Woman Jun 6th, 2008 07:47 PM

fuck's sake, buy me this puppy

http://portland.craigslist.org/clk/pet/707784487.html


:( :( :(

MarioRPG Jun 6th, 2008 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pac-man (Post 559399)


Ladies and gentlemen, I've been to Vietnam, Iraq, and Afghanistan, and I can say without hyperbole that this is a million times worse than all of them put together.

What an obscure quote.

pac-man Jun 6th, 2008 09:26 PM

:fart

ElPila666 Jun 7th, 2008 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr. Octogonopus (Post 550904)
Hey, I never said anything about how funny it is or isn't.
And that's your argument now? I try to get you to see reason, and you resort to NO YOU SHUT UP ? Good job, Pub. You absolutely destroyed me. My teenage mind cannot comprehend how badly you owned me.

:tear

ElPila666 Jun 7th, 2008 07:31 PM

:pagebrak
Because i'm boring

Fathom Zero Jun 8th, 2008 12:00 AM

Hey Esuohlim, you up for recording some more Forum Masterpiece Theatre bits?

Fathom Zero Jun 8th, 2008 12:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 558214)
I'd never ever play this IRL because I'm the kind of person who has to have roleplaying in his tabletop RPGs, and it takes a really special kind of friend to watch someone pretend to DRIFT TO AND FRO TWIXT THE FEYWILDS and then still want to be friends afterwords. Strangers on the internet are fine, though.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=4THOJDVH

Fathom Zero Jun 8th, 2008 12:28 AM

Is it weird that the song Baker Street makes me think of driving down the street of an abandoned town at 3 in the morning while it's raining?

ElPila666 Jun 8th, 2008 02:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 558214)
I'd never ever play this IRL because I'mthe kind of person who has to have roleplaying in his tabletop RPGs,and it takes a really special kind of friend to watch someone pretendto DRIFT TO AND FRO TWIXT THE FEYWILDS and then still want to befriends afterwords. Strangers on the internet are fine, though.

http://www.mediafire.com/?90d6egsh1gs

Fathom Zero Jun 8th, 2008 02:22 AM

Yes.

Sethomas Jun 8th, 2008 02:49 AM

So, I'm about to go to the bars. I'm wearing a shirt I like a lot. Long-sleeve button-down, jet black sateen made of 100% silk.

I feel like I should demonstrate my affinity for it with some crass hyperbole.

Dude, because of this shirt tonight I'm gonna get so much pussy that I'll wake up with more STDs than mainstream pathology presently recognizes. So many chicks are going to want me that we'll have to find a late night stadium that rents by the hour. Tomorrow morning, there will be significant shortages in the national supply of the "morning-after pill" because of me wearing this shirt. In the aftermath of my mental puissance coming together with me wearing this shirt tonight, the global average IQ will raise by at least two points as my bastards enter the population.

ElPila666 Jun 8th, 2008 04:03 AM

man, i kind of understand you, i have some awesome buds to smoke, that i'll like to share with some chick, i mean find a stoner girlfriend to share my trips with cuz i am sick of smoke all by miself, of course when i'm stoned i forget about all this lonely feeling, if i quit pot i bet i could be getting laid at this moment, life is unfair, god gives bread to people that has no teeth :tear

ElPila666 Jun 8th, 2008 04:35 AM


pac-man Jun 8th, 2008 05:28 AM

You could probably eat bread with no teeth.

liquidstatik Jun 8th, 2008 07:24 AM

ElPila666 you can smoke w/ me babbbyy ;>

pac-man Jun 8th, 2008 07:43 AM

This is where somebody who works here says something like, "I-Mockery does not support the use of illegal substances." Right?




No? Okay, well, who's got the hook-up on some jenkem?

liquidstatik Jun 8th, 2008 08:32 AM

:barf

Fathom Zero Jun 8th, 2008 12:00 PM

Jesus Christ.

HickMan Jun 8th, 2008 02:38 PM

hey liquid statik wanna join a gang?

Pub Lover Jun 8th, 2008 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RaNkeri (Post 559718)
fark you >:

I wasn't talking to you, Buddy. You posted while I was debating whether to add some legitimate content to my post. As always, I decided against it.
Quote:

Originally Posted by ElPila666 (Post 559542)
:tear

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU CRYING ABOUT? >:

I MADE DR O STOP POSTING AND THAT WAS MY GOAL, EVEN IF I DID IT WITHOUT HIM GETTING MY IRONY. :spin

liquidstatik Jun 8th, 2008 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HickMan (Post 559696)
hey liquid statik wanna join a gang?

stawrberry hills? :x

Pub Lover Jun 8th, 2008 06:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by liquidstatik (Post 559724)

Who the hell hosts anything on angelfire since 2001?

MarioRPG Jun 8th, 2008 08:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 559725)
Who the hell hosts anything on angelfire since 2001?

Haha, let's all load up our AOL discs guys.

liquidstatik Jun 9th, 2008 01:07 AM

:lol

liquidstatik Jun 9th, 2008 01:07 AM

aol

WhiteRat Jun 9th, 2008 04:32 AM

I went to a greasy bar in Superior, Wisconsin tonight and watched two of my friends hustle all of the pool players there. Also, the electronic juke boxes that take 1$ bills are the devil.

executioneer Jun 9th, 2008 05:10 AM

oh man did it take credit cards and let you "download" songs too

WhiteRat Jun 9th, 2008 12:58 PM

That would be the one.

Fathom Zero Jun 9th, 2008 02:01 PM


MattJack Jun 9th, 2008 02:30 PM

bureaucrats :rolleyes

Pub Lover Jun 9th, 2008 04:51 PM

Can I get a preemptive ban on Colonelclusterfuck? :domo

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 559834)
Admittedly this is generally only funny if you've played Deus Ex and understand the basic concpt of a Youtube Poop, both of which you guys have seemed to have failed to do

I have now learned what constitutes a Youtube Poop. I do not detect it's humour. :domo
Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 559872)
Quote:

Originally Posted by Sacks (Post 559756)
She's also a foot fetishist.

You say that like it's a bad thing!

Seven Force is a foot fetishist. :domo


Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 559882)
Richard Ramirez is a dick. And he does Incredible Hulk fanart (look under May 2006).

I doubt that is the killer or the musician. :domo

RaNkeri Jun 9th, 2008 04:56 PM

I've been downloading "Ocean of Fear" for about 4 days.

It's better be worth the wait >:

Colonelclusterfuck Jun 9th, 2008 06:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 559885)
Can I get a preemptive ban on Colonelclusterfuck? :domo

Banning me is considered flamboyantly gay in atleast... five countries


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