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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

RaNkeri Jun 18th, 2010 02:33 PM

fgt

Dimnos Jun 18th, 2010 02:38 PM

Anything smaller than a B is just sick.

Fathom Zero Jun 18th, 2010 02:50 PM

Unless you're into small boys. Then it's right up your alley.

Kitsa Jun 18th, 2010 02:53 PM

depends on the shape of the woman involved, some things just look ridiculously disproportionate.

Small boobs on someone with my shape would just be sad, so I guess at least I balance out.

Chojin Jun 18th, 2010 04:19 PM

i usually wear a size small now. a year ago i was bordering on XXL.

i have mixed feelings about this

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 18th, 2010 04:43 PM

I need to use the Chojin weight loss system. Just without the Randy Orton crush.

Chojin Jun 18th, 2010 05:25 PM

This is what I used:

Version 2.0:
http://www.bodyrecomposition.com/the...-loss-handbook

Version 1.0 is in this torrent:
http://thepiratebay.org/torrent/4628392/Fitness.rar

Version 2.0 is updated due to studies that had been completed since 1.0 and therefore has some new recommendations for supplements and cardio. Also 2.0 includes a strength training guide and online diet plan (I don't use either of them, tbh, but I think most people would find them helpful). I bought the 2.0 book after the diet helped me lose 40 lbs; I figured it was the least I could do.

For strength training, I did Starting Strength:

Site:
http://startingstrength.wikia.com/wi..._Strength_Wiki

Torrent:
http://thepiratebay.org/torrent/4776...ook_and_DVDrip

Now I just do my own system, because my squats were getting so high that I was frequently injuring myself due to the weight and frequency (SS has you squat every other day, which is fine when you're just...starting). My current system is basically the SS variant that uses chins instead of power cleans, then I added a couple exercises to hit areas that SS is weak on and increased the reps to 10x.

So my new lifitng schedule looks like this (incl. weight from a 22 lb standard bar):

A:
Squat 10x3 @ 142 lbs
Bench press 10x3 @ 152 lbs
Standing curlz 10x3 @ 47 lbs

B:
Clean pulls 10x3 @ 202 lbs
Seated military press 10x3 @ 102 lbs
Deadlifts 5x1 @ 252 lbs

Then I also do pullups/chinups and dragon flags at the end of the workouts if I can.

kahljorn Jun 18th, 2010 05:33 PM

KO KO MUST BE A FGT AND THATS PROLLY WHY HIS AVATAR IS A SHUDDERING PENIS


CHOJIN IS TRAINING TO BE A NAZI? ITG ALL MAKES SENSE

Kitsa Jun 18th, 2010 05:41 PM

dragon flag?

Chojin Jun 18th, 2010 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 689677)
dragon flag?



it's an ab exercise invented by bruce lee

Fathom Zero Jun 18th, 2010 06:01 PM

Fuck. Looks fun as hell.

Chojin Jun 18th, 2010 06:03 PM

yeah, it looking rad as hell contributed to my decision

kahljorn Jun 18th, 2010 06:04 PM

:lol

i think that's the same exercise powdered toast man does

Kitsa Jun 18th, 2010 10:41 PM

Amazing how fast good evenings go to shit.

Anyway, I was at a concert earlier this evening and some guy looked like Jake Busey and all I could think was I FOOKED UR MOM. And fuck you guys for ruining it for me :(

Fathom Zero Jun 18th, 2010 10:43 PM

:(

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 19th, 2010 12:47 AM

Fuck. I would never want to meet jake busey.

What else.....chojin that exorcise looks badass. Maybe too much for me.

I'm watching tosh.0 and they have chris crocker on. He has long hair and I'm pretty sure I would do (her). Kinda had some drinks.

kahljorn Jun 19th, 2010 04:51 AM

i was watching that southpark where they meet that guy when they are getting internet money the other day and i was like WHO THE FUCK IS THAT GUy and now i know :(

Kitsa Jun 19th, 2010 05:31 AM

There was also a guy who looked exactly like John C Reilly but I didn't take a picture of him as he was a mental health patient and I don't do that shit.

kahljorn Jun 19th, 2010 07:53 AM

you mean this?

Colonel Flagg Jun 19th, 2010 07:53 AM

Are you sure John C Reilly isn't a mental health patient?

kahljorn Jun 19th, 2010 07:55 AM

man i suck at youtube :(

anyway its that mean senator dude http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v60oNUoHBYM

Kitsa Jun 19th, 2010 09:04 PM

More like this, only more forehead wrinkles. Otherwise he looked remarkably like him.


10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 19th, 2010 09:45 PM

Wow, fuck that senator guy.

Kitsa Jun 19th, 2010 10:00 PM

I dunno, he seems kind of paranoid :(

Colonel Flagg Jun 19th, 2010 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 689725)
Wow, fuck that senator guy.

Guy's a douche. But so was the student.

Student filming representative walking down the street. Asks loaded question. Rep asks question in return "Who are you?" - student refuses to answer. (Reasonable question - the student addressed him by name, so he already had some information about Rep - student should have answered immediately - and did not, merely repeated the question several times.)

Rep gets pissed off. Gets caught on film/posted on YouTube.

In retrospect, Rep should have either ignored the student, or (better choice) since the student refused to identify himself, just say pleasantly "I have no comment to those who haven't the courage to stand behind their questioning."

Fathom Zero Jun 20th, 2010 12:15 AM

So, because the students didn't immediately give their name, (which they probably would have, had an actual interview transpired), that gives the guy carte blanche to grab them?

So no, I don't think the students were spineless just because they didn't give their names to an asshole.

Esuohlim Jun 20th, 2010 01:35 AM

I HAVE A FRIEND WHO LOOKS LIKE JOHN C. REILLY >:

JOHN C. REILLY 20 YEARS AGO MAYBE :(

Babs Jun 20th, 2010 02:05 AM

What friends milhouse?

On the Jake Busey note, I was working the other day and saw a perfect Jake Busey look-a-like RIGHT AFTER spotting a Kitsa look-a-like 3 minutes prior... NOW THAT'S A COINCIDENCE.

Kitsa Jun 20th, 2010 08:53 AM

red hair does not a kitsa lookalike make.

Was she fat?

I WAS IN COLUMBUS YESTERDAY, HOW'S THAT FOR A MINDFUCK.

On the senator...if the students didn't want to identify themselves by name, they should have at least given the college/high school they were affiliated with by way of introduction.

Babs Jun 20th, 2010 01:34 PM

She had red hair and a baby. Instant qualification.

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 20th, 2010 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 689735)
In retrospect, Rep should have either ignored the student, or (better choice) since the student refused to identify himself, just say pleasantly "I have no comment to those who haven't the courage to stand behind their questioning."

I agree.

Fathom Zero Jun 20th, 2010 02:33 PM

Or, after they said they were students, he could have asked, "From what school," and started a report with the students.

This could have been handled by him in any other way and it would have been better. But he showed himself to be what he is. That's all.

kahljorn Jun 20th, 2010 05:29 PM

i hate cars :( i just bought a new car last month and the AC already died ;/

Fathom Zero Jun 20th, 2010 05:30 PM

I'm getting a plum-coloured Oldsmobile Alero shortly. :\

Fathom Zero Jun 20th, 2010 05:34 PM


Tadao Jun 21st, 2010 12:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 689766)
I need to show you a picture of our parking space at the zoo yesterday, tadao. Shit was first row in front of the gate.

We just went to Six Flags Magic Mountain with 3 dads today and all the cripple parking was taken. I'll tell you though, using it in L.A. for metered parking is awesome, cause every street is metered.

Fathom Zero Jun 21st, 2010 12:13 AM


Esuohlim Jun 21st, 2010 01:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 689793)
We just went to Six Flags Magic Mountain with 3 dads today.

You're lucky I only have 1 dad :(

executioneer Jun 21st, 2010 02:32 AM

is your dad sad

MarioRPG Jun 21st, 2010 10:01 AM

Oh hey guys I'm back from Fiji
Any interesting developments during my absence? More bannings I assume. And I'll post some pictures of the trip some time when I weed out the terrible ones.

Dimnos Jun 21st, 2010 11:34 AM

Was Fiji as bad ass as I would imagine it to be?

The Leader Jun 21st, 2010 11:55 AM

Wrong thread. How embarrassing. :x

edit: Welcome back MarioRPG. Did you remember to get Tadao a souvenir?

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 21st, 2010 01:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 689774)
I'm getting a plum-coloured Oldsmobile Alero shortly. :\


:( The alero is really bad. I know 5 close people who have had one and they all had problems with theirs.

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 21st, 2010 01:33 PM

I wanna see all the pictures MarioRPFIJI

Fathom Zero Jun 21st, 2010 04:41 PM

I know a guy with one, too. His passenger side door is held on with bungee cables.

Esuohlim Jun 21st, 2010 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 689796)
is your dad sad

Yes my dad is a Sad Dad :(

Esuohlim Jun 21st, 2010 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 689801)
Oh hey guys I'm back from Fiji

Does being back from Fiji make you a sad dad :(

executioneer Jun 22nd, 2010 01:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 689801)
Oh hey guys I'm back from Fiji

WHAT COLOUR WERE THE HATS AT THE HOTDOG STAND :religiousdebate

Fathom Zero Jun 22nd, 2010 02:34 AM

DRAGONCOCK: like Hackers
DRAGONCOCK: I AM ACID BURN
Horace Horsecollar: and I'm that guy that was in scooby doo later in his career
DRAGONCOCK: hahaha
DRAGONCOCK: i can't even remember his hacker name

Kitsa Jun 22nd, 2010 09:47 AM

That movie sucked ass hard.



Grislygus Jun 22nd, 2010 12:48 PM

:patchesbrok

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 689735)
Guy's a douche. But so was the student.

Student filming representative walking down the street. Asks loaded question. Rep asks question in return "Who are you?" - student refuses to answer. (Reasonable question - the student addressed him by name, so he already had some information about Rep - student should have answered immediately - and did not, merely repeated the question several times.)

Rep gets pissed off. Gets caught on film/posted on YouTube.

In retrospect, Rep should have either ignored the student, or (better choice) since the student refused to identify himself, just say pleasantly "I have no comment to those who haven't the courage to stand behind their questioning."

D'AAAW. that last option is just PRECIOUS. so let's review: gangly punk kids think they're hotshots and are gonna ask a senator a "GOTCHA!" question without identifying themselves, because THAT'S THE WAY THEY ROLL.

the natural response to this, of course, is to grab them in an impotent and inexplicable rage and exhibit behavior that I haven't heard of since my aunt and mom remembered that they hated each other during my little brother's high school graduation

Dimnos Jun 22nd, 2010 12:58 PM

In short. Everyone in the video is an ass hat.

MarioRPG Jun 22nd, 2010 05:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dimnos (Post 689805)
Was Fiji as bad ass as I would imagine it to be?

It was the best trip ever. Honestly. It's a beautiful country and the weather is almost always fantastic. The people are all friendly and welcoming. I'd definitely go back. Felt good to do volunteer work too. Many of us who went on the trip already miss it and want to plan an in-Canada reunion already.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Leader (Post 689807)
edit: Welcome back MarioRPG. Did you remember to get Tadao a souvenir?

I've got a postcard I'm sure I could send his way. Although I did see a knockoff "Power Station" that boasted 8-bits of gaming power that I jokingly thought about picking up. That'd more be for someone like Chojin though. It even had a terribly image of Lara Croft on the box

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 689815)
I wanna see all the pictures MarioRPFIJI

Woop! I'll get a thread up in a day or so and show off.

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 689836)
WHAT COLOUR WERE THE HATS AT THE HOTDOG STAND :religiousdebate

I'm sure I'm missing something here. But regardless hats are banned in the villages because they offend the chief.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 689818)
Does being back from Fiji make you a sad dad :(

:(

Kitsa Jun 22nd, 2010 05:43 PM

http://www.regretsy.com/2010/06/22/atm-machine/

human centipede cat toy.

Esuohlim Jun 22nd, 2010 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 689887)
But regardless hats are banned in the villages because they offend the chief.




NO HATS ALLOWED

Kitsa Jun 22nd, 2010 07:07 PM

Lynne Thigpen :(


executioneer Jun 22nd, 2010 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 689839)
DRAGONCOCK: like Hackers
DRAGONCOCK: I AM ACID BURN
Horace Horsecollar: and I'm that guy that was in scooby doo later in his career
DRAGONCOCK: hahaha
DRAGONCOCK: i can't even remember his hacker name

important fact i learned from Hackers: real hackers use mac laptops

executioneer Jun 22nd, 2010 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 689887)
I'm sure I'm missing something here. But regardless hats are banned in the villages because they offend the chief.

I WAS MAKING A RED DWARF REFERENCE

Fathom Zero Jun 23rd, 2010 10:55 PM

Hey, 10k, can I call you ghost dad?

Tadao Jun 24th, 2010 03:39 AM

That's ok, keep the postcard, next time you go to Fiji send me one from there. :wank :eek :orgasm

Chojin Jun 24th, 2010 05:43 AM


10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 24th, 2010 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 690042)
Hey, 10k, can I call you ghost dad?

I endorse this. I'd even reccomend putting the 10K V Ghost on top of Bill Cosby's head.

:ANGRIESTPLAGIARISM

Kitsa Jun 24th, 2010 04:29 PM

I was really, genuinely considering making a 10,000V (cartoon version) cake for the hell of it. I had visions of orange coconut.

I might still do it, I just have to be in the mood.

MLE Jun 24th, 2010 06:08 PM

I made ginger rice balls. They were good.

Kitsa Jun 24th, 2010 09:11 PM

zhukov, that apple chocolate you sent was incredibly kickass. Up till now, I had never partaken in apple flavoring that actually tasted like fresh apples and not that godawful sour green apple crap. Because of the sour apple crap, I was convinced I did not like apple-flavored things. The chocolate you sent has made me rethink this.

Babs Jun 24th, 2010 09:21 PM

COMFEST WEEK KITSA, SEE YOU AND YOUR LOOK A LIKES THERE.

Kitsa Jun 24th, 2010 09:33 PM

I WILL BE NOWHERE NEAR THERE FOR MORE REASONS THAN ONE.

The Leader Jun 24th, 2010 09:41 PM

BUT MOSTLY BECAUSE YOU WILL BE THERE, BABS

Kitsa Jun 24th, 2010 09:46 PM

thanks for the heads-up, though, I have to pass through Columbus and I appreciate the reminder that traffic will be a thick slice of hell :(

Babs Jun 24th, 2010 09:58 PM

:lol Comfest is a dead museum of yuppies, hipsters, and homeless gypsies. I'll more than likely find myself three sheets to the wind next to the stagnant waters of the Scioto instead.

Kitsa Jun 24th, 2010 10:04 PM

there are plenty of idiots who think it's Burning Man

Babs Jun 24th, 2010 10:13 PM

That and the persistant abuse of "hacky sack".

Kitsa Jun 24th, 2010 10:19 PM

speaking of sack.

http://technorati.com/entertainment/...oing-it-wrong/

Video completely NSFW, bitty wiener visible.

Babs Jun 24th, 2010 10:30 PM

None of that should be on your mind, you know, being a mom and all. Almost qualifying as a sad dad :(

Kitsa Jun 24th, 2010 10:41 PM

Not sure what you mean by on my mind, but that guy had a number of sad situations going on. I was surprised they didn't censor the footage somehow.

I have a special eyeroll for all the people standing around, "FREEEDOM OF SPEECH! YEAH, I'M TAPING THIS, MAN! THE WORLD IS WATCHING!"

The problem with modern "hippies" is that, for the most part, they are utterly vapid. They have no message. They have no conviction. They have fads and they have vague unhappiness and they still buy their ankle-length batik dresses from Nirvana at the mall.

I know of a few exceptions, but they were around for actual hippiedom when it really was about something.

The Leader Jun 24th, 2010 10:52 PM

I'm pretty sure a large portion of the hippies of yore were that way too.

Zhukov Jun 24th, 2010 10:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690141)
zhukov, that apple chocolate you sent was incredibly kickass. Up till now, I had never partaken in apple flavoring that actually tasted like fresh apples and not that godawful sour green apple crap. Because of the sour apple crap, I was convinced I did not like apple-flavored things. The chocolate you sent has made me rethink this.

We do apples right in the apple isle.

Otto Jun 24th, 2010 10:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Leader (Post 690162)
I'm pretty sure a large portion of the hippies of yore were that way too.

Yeah, I think that the downfall of the original counterculture was that it got co-opted and most hippies didn't care about it. You had companies manufacturing bell-bottoms and 7-Up using psychedelic imagery in their advertisements.

Babs Jun 24th, 2010 11:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690161)
Not sure what you mean by on my mind, but that guy had a number of sad situations going on. I was surprised they didn't censor the footage somehow.

I have a special eyeroll for all the people standing around, "FREEEDOM OF SPEECH! YEAH, I'M TAPING THIS, MAN! THE WORLD IS WATCHING!"

The problem with modern "hippies" is that, for the most part, they are utterly vapid. They have no message. They have no conviction. They have fads and they have vague unhappiness and they still buy their ankle-length batik dresses from Nirvana at the mall.

I know of a few exceptions, but they were around for actual hippiedom when it really was about something.

This generation of kids are more than impressionable, they're a flock of shit looking for the next asshole to do their worthless talking so they can sideline themselves and comfortably nod to the nonsensible shit their big ass spews out. They're the type of clowns that let citations do the arguing, not knowing one piece of information they're agreeing too.

Fathom Zero Jun 25th, 2010 01:01 AM

I really wanted to be a yippie when I was twelve. :<

Esuohlim Jun 25th, 2010 01:05 AM

Did anyone watch the new Futurama episodes?

It was pretty underwhelming :(

Fathom Zero Jun 25th, 2010 01:07 AM

I would never have guessed.

Esuohlim Jun 25th, 2010 01:18 AM

Don't get me wrong, it was funny. It just felt different :\

The Leader Jun 25th, 2010 01:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babs (Post 690165)
This generation of kids are more than impressionable, they're a flock of shit looking for the next asshole to do their worthless talking so they can sideline themselves and comfortably nod to the nonsensible shit their big ass spews out. They're the type of clowns that let citations do the arguing, not knowing one piece of information they're agreeing too.

Jesus, shut up.

Babs Jun 25th, 2010 04:30 AM



I mean do I really have to say much about this?

...chud

Wiffles Jun 25th, 2010 08:15 AM

Isnt it time we removed the "HEY KGP4DEATH CAN YOU SEE THIS" part of this topic title? Its kinda getting old ^.^;

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 25th, 2010 09:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690112)
I was really, genuinely considering making a 10,000V (cartoon version) cake for the hell of it. I had visions of orange coconut.

I might still do it, I just have to be in the mood.

That would be the best cake ever.

Colonel Flagg Jun 25th, 2010 09:32 AM

'sup Wiffy? :)

Wiffles Jun 25th, 2010 10:43 AM

Life in the candy coated mean-streets is rough ^.^;

Fathom Zero Jun 25th, 2010 10:50 AM

:lol

Fathom Zero Jun 25th, 2010 10:51 AM

Me, I'm steppin to the AM

Dimnos Jun 25th, 2010 11:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wiffles (Post 690189)
Isnt it time we removed the "HEY KGP4DEATH CAN YOU SEE THIS" part of this topic title? Its kinda getting old ^.^;


Willie said he was going to leave it up there for a year.

Dimnos Jun 25th, 2010 11:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 690176)
Did anyone watch the new Futurama episodes?

It was pretty underwhelming :(

I thought it was good. It wasnt fucking great or anything but it was good. Although I only watched the first one. I didnt catch the second one because I was on baby duty.

Zhukov Jun 25th, 2010 11:34 AM

Hello Wiffles, how are you?


My best mate is working on Christmas Island for a month, so I went out this Friday night with some other guys hoping to have a good night anyway. I ended up at a casino for an hour watching someone play the pokies while I supped a free cup of tea :( waiting in vain for the chance to go somewhere better and let rip on the dance floor while wooing beautiful women.

kahljorn Jun 25th, 2010 11:39 AM

Quote:

This generation of kids are more than impressionable, they're a flock of shit looking for the next asshole to do their worthless talking so they can sideline themselves and comfortably nod to the nonsensible shit their big ass spews out. They're the type of clowns that let citations do the arguing, not knowing one piece of information they're agreeing too.
I read that in a COPS voice :(

Dimnos Jun 25th, 2010 12:07 PM

What the hell are pokies and why were you not playing blackjack?

Zhukov Jun 25th, 2010 12:34 PM

I was not playing anything, I was waiting around making fun of the unfortunates that waste their lives in there, before realising that I was in there wasting my life. There were so many pensioners there, and I think I saw a lady with a pram. I think you might call pokies slot machines.



They give you free coffee or tea there though. I guess to keep people playing longer. When you win (I saw the guy I was waiting for 'win') they give you credits to keep playing rather than money. Wtf? What is the point of playing if you don't even win money?

The Leader Jun 25th, 2010 01:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babs (Post 690186)
I mean do I really have to say much about this?

...chud

:lol Are you good at anything?

Dimnos Jun 25th, 2010 01:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 690218)
I was not playing anything, I was waiting around making fun of the unfortunates that waste their lives in there, before realising that I was in there wasting my life. There were so many pensioners there, and I think I saw a lady with a pram. I think you might call pokies slot machines.

Ah. Yeah slot machines or just slots. Whats a pram though? :lol


Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 690218)
They give you free coffee or tea there though. I guess to keep people playing longer. When you win (I saw the guy I was waiting for 'win') they give you credits to keep playing rather than money. Wtf? What is the point of playing if you don't even win money?

Round these parts they dont stop at coffee and tea. They will give you free liquor if your playing. If your drunk you make dumb decisions and loose even more of your money to the casino. With the credits there should be a booth somewhere you can turn your credits/chips in for cash.

Kitsa Jun 25th, 2010 01:47 PM

A pram is a stroller.

I spent a very bad couple days of my life in Atlantic City. Not only is the place a rat-infested shithole with nasty, sludge-y, filthy beaches, but the casinos were so very sad. There were many old people chain-smoking and wheeling oxygen tanks (???) (!!!) and they all had big keyrings full of plastic rewards cards that they plugged into the machines. When they won, they got little slips of paper that had to be turned in at an office for cash. I never won more than a few dollars.

Then I went to an arcade and shot a token down some sort of jackpot slot and it spit out a literal bucketful of tickets, and the workers were all mad at me when I turned the tickets in for some porcelain doll that was locked high in a case that signified it was unattainable.

See also:



"Atlantic City Hookers: It Ain't E-Z Being a Ho" (NSFW)


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