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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

bigtimecow Jan 13th, 2010 07:10 PM

it's a pretty damn interesting read, mainly because i don't understand the context under which all of this stuff happens. one comment mentioned "taking your slave out of his cage"; is this just keeping with the terminology? or does someone really live their lives in a cage under someone else's authority? or are people like together in a relationship, living mainstream lives (or i guess "normal" or wahtever) but then behind closed doors everything is how is described?

Grislygus Jan 13th, 2010 07:34 PM

http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/583693

http://www.angelfire.com/ca4/slavepages/training.html

elx Jan 13th, 2010 07:42 PM

dexter has cancer :(

Tadao Jan 13th, 2010 08:01 PM

My back problems wont allow me to be a slave :(

10,000 Volt Ghost Jan 13th, 2010 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 667609)
So, I was in the grocery store, frozen bin isle, and Dancing Queen comes on over the radio. I sat there thinking in slow-mo how I would wield 2 sub machines and twirl/dance to the music gunning people down. It was a huge open isle with bunkers in the middle. Lots of people milling about.


:lol

MarioRPG Jan 13th, 2010 08:27 PM

GW: Yeah, I remember one of my profs saying something like, 'write two pages, and cut out the crap so it's down to one page' or something that effect.

Pentegarn Jan 13th, 2010 09:54 PM

The new chat title makes me :lol

executioneer Jan 13th, 2010 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BABALITY PANCAKES (Post 667589)
What am I missing here? Why is that KGP asshole in the i-mock chat title?

because someone mentioned him, and since he google-searches his name EVERY DAY he showed up as soon as the google crawler hit the forums, so i thought i'd give him a SPECIAL PUNISHMENT where he gets to be taunted by not being able to create drama every day and i don't have to do shit apart from leaving the title the way it is (WHICH AS EVIDENCED BY LAST YEAR, ISNT GONNA BE TOO HARD), either that or he can stop being so fucking concerned with what other people think of his idiot face and retarded sixth grade romhack and move on with his life

dextire Jan 13th, 2010 11:07 PM

:lol Great explanation, Willie! I like how you make it sound less like you banned the guy, and more like you condemned him to hell. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 667623)
dexter has cancer :(

I heard that too. :(
The good news is that they caught it early, the disease is in remission, and he's almost done with the treatment.
I've been a fan of Michael C. Hall since Six Feet Under, and Dexter is an awesome show.

kahljorn Jan 13th, 2010 11:10 PM

man we didn't even have to say kgp4death's name 3 times ;/

ISNT THAT CHEATING?

Tadao Jan 13th, 2010 11:21 PM

I bet he was all disappointed that no one has said a word about him since he left :lol

Pentegarn Jan 14th, 2010 12:25 AM

I'd rather talk about piranhas

executioneer Jan 14th, 2010 12:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dextire (Post 667650)
I like how you make it sound less like you banned the guy, and more like you condemned him to hell. :)

i condemned him to himself :x

HELL IS OTHER PEOPLE

Babs Jan 14th, 2010 04:01 AM

I started to go thug so I don't care about this conversation anymore. Unless you're talking about ice, rims, or beef curtains I don't give uh fuck.

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 04:04 AM

Hey bro, you stayin' out of trouble?

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 08:51 AM

HEY ASSHOLES

HOW DO YOU LIKE MY NEW AVATAR?

Pentegarn Jan 14th, 2010 08:52 AM

It makes me want to..... wait for it..... goose you. Hey-oh!

/rimshot

Or is it a duck? If so I think it is..... wait for it.... just ducky! Hey-oh!

/rimshot

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 09:07 AM

I DONT KNOW BUT EITHER WAY TALKING IN ALL CAPS AND BEING ANGRY ALL THE TIME MAKES ALOT OF SENSE ALL OF A SUDDEN

Colonel Flagg Jan 14th, 2010 09:31 AM

Yo honky!

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 09:42 AM

MAYBE YOU ARENT AWARE OF THIS BUT RACIAL SLURS OF SUCH A DERAGOTRYAYGDAIUD NAURE ARE PUNISHABLE BY ME EXPLODING :(

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 09:42 AM

ASSASSIN >:

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 10:01 AM

I CANT FALL ASLEEP / STOP EATING PIZZA.

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 10:06 AM

GUS I READ THAT LINK YOU POSTED AND IVE LEARNED A LOT

FOR EXAMPLE:
Quote:

Hello Potential Collard slave,
Spoilers!


I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO BE SOMEBODIES COLLARD SLAVE :(

Pentegarn Jan 14th, 2010 12:51 PM

Mustard greens didn't want any of that?

Dixie Jan 14th, 2010 01:14 PM

tomorrow morning i leave for a 2 week east coast/midwest tour.
i will miss yall's shenanigans.

kitsa, i wish you the best of luck
:)

Kitsa Jan 14th, 2010 01:16 PM

:pagebrak



Thanks, Dixie, you too...

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 01:18 PM

Later Dixie, be a good girl.

10,000 Volt Ghost Jan 14th, 2010 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dixie (Post 667742)
tomorrow morning i leave for a 2 week east coast/midwest tour.
i will miss yall's shenanigans.

kitsa, i wish you the best of luck
:)


Come through the rust belt please :)

Dixie Jan 14th, 2010 02:17 PM

thanks :)
i plan on being a good girl, i might not be sober, but i'll definitely behave.

wtf is a rust belt?

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 02:21 PM

The place where dreams go to die.

Dixie Jan 14th, 2010 02:22 PM

dude, i'm not getting married again, i already told you that

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 02:26 PM

Why not, 3rd times a charm. :rolleyes

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 02:28 PM


Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 05:15 PM


10,000 Volt Ghost Jan 14th, 2010 05:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dixie (Post 667751)
thanks :)
i plan on being a good girl, i might not be sober, but i'll definitely behave.

wtf is a rust belt?


Buffalo, NY through Cleveland, OH, Chicago, IL and detroit, MI.

Come to the Buffalove

elx Jan 14th, 2010 05:26 PM

yum, avatar larvae

Zhukov Jan 14th, 2010 05:28 PM

Don't you believe in cutlery and crockery?

Kitsa Jan 14th, 2010 05:33 PM

blue food coloring :love

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 05:37 PM

I bet he used blue poweraid or something like that.

Dimnos Jan 14th, 2010 05:38 PM

Is that a bowl of Smacks?

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 05:54 PM

kgp4death
Banned
Last Activity: Jan 14th, 2010 02:45 PM
Sending Forum Feedback @ 02:45 PM


:lol :lol :lol

Pentegarn Jan 14th, 2010 06:17 PM

Dear Mockery

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Regards,

kgp4death

Pub Lover Jan 14th, 2010 07:00 PM

Whatever happened to BlueOatmeal? He sure loved the guys LADIES. :)

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgp4death leaves forum feedback
I was banned forever for no reason user name kgp4death please look into it.thanks.


Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 07:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dimnos (Post 667782)
Is that a bowl of Smacks?

it's oatmeal with blue food coloring in it. since I can't really mix up the taste factor without affecting the calorie balance, I mix it up for my EYESSS

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 667781)
I bet he used blue poweraid or something like that.

lol'd

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 07:31 PM

I'm on phase 1 of the South Beach Diet. Plain food aint that bad, I've cut out most sugars along time ago anyways so maybe I'm already used to it.

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 667806)
I'm on phase 1 of the South Beach Diet. Plain food aint that bad, I've cut out most sugars along time ago anyways so maybe I'm already used to it.

my biggest bitch with low carb diets is that i begin to get ravenous for shit like bread :<

i don't even eat much bread otherwise but suddenly when I am denied i go all OH SHIIIIT BREAAAAAD FUUUCKKK

Kitsa Jan 14th, 2010 07:48 PM

Chojin- you have no idea how much shit I take in the name of blue food coloring.

Seriously, like, sometimes 20-30 emails a day.

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 07:49 PM

tadao - oh, anyway, you didn't seem fat in your pics. crash diets like south beach are mostly for people that need to lose a lot of weight very quickly for health reasons.

a much better way to diet is to count calories and then eat about 500 less per day than it'd take to maintain your bodyweight. 3500 kcal = 1 pound of fat, so in theory you should lose a pound of fat every week doing that (in practice, more of that pound is lost in lean body mass unless you exercise - but also if you exercise your calorie requirements go up, so you can both eat more and get better results).

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 667810)
Chojin- you have no idea how much shit I take in the name of blue food coloring.

Seriously, like, sometimes 20-30 emails a day.

do you work for mccormick or something? are you one of those aliens from bart vs the space mutants, only your fetish is for blue instead of purple? I MUST KNOW

bigtimecow Jan 14th, 2010 07:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dixie (Post 667742)
tomorrow morning i leave for a 2 week east coast/midwest tour.
i will miss yall's shenanigans.

kitsa, i wish you the best of luck
:)

where in the east coast you gonna be girl?

Kitsa Jan 14th, 2010 07:51 PM

:pagebrak


I'm a food artist and every time something I've done with blue food coloring shows up in some magazine somewhere I get a bunch of people who go all nuts AAARRRGH IT'S GROSS WHO WOULD EAT SOMETHING BLUE YOU MUST WANT US TO POISON OUR CHILDREN YOU EVIL BITCH GAAARRGGGGGGGHHH

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 07:51 PM

Yeah, I see bread everywhere now. :(

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bigtimecow (Post 667812)
where in the east coast you gonna be girl?

also, will you jump up and down on my penis [ ] yes [ ] no

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 667813)
I'm a food artist and every time something I've done with blue food coloring shows up in some magazine somewhere I get a bunch of people who go all nuts AAARRRGH IT'S GROSS WHO WOULD EAT SOMETHING BLUE YOU MUST WANT US TO POISON OUR CHILDREN YOU EVIL BITCH GAAARRGGGGGGGHHH



People really have issues with eating blue things? weird



everyone knows blue shit is awesome for you


Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 667811)
tadao - oh, anyway, you didn't seem fat in your pics. crash diets like south beach are mostly for people that need to lose a lot of weight very quickly for health reasons.

a much better way to diet is to count calories and then eat about 500 less per day than it'd take to maintain your bodyweight. 3500 kcal = 1 pound of fat, so in theory you should lose a pound of fat every week doing that (in practice, more of that pound is lost in lean body mass unless you exercise - but also if you exercise your calorie requirements go up, so you can both eat more and get better results).

I've been slowly getting huge in the belly. I need to drop 20 pounds and then maybe a little more. This holiday of candy and leftovers, plus slackin with my GF has really done me wrong.

Kitsa Jan 14th, 2010 07:58 PM

I know, that's what I'm sayin'.

One of my things when I'm doing Japanese lunchbox art is putting a couple of drops of blue food coloring in the rice-cooker water. It results in really vivid blue rice which is great for backgrounds. I can even screw with it and get a mottled background that looks a little like a cloudy sky.

And every time people get wind of it, I start getting emails about how gross blue rice is and how they'd never eat it and how toxic they're sure it must be blahblahblah.

People have no idea how much food coloring they take in every day. It's in vitamins, for crying out loud.

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 08:01 PM

tadao - i'd advise you to not fad/crash diet if you don't need to lose 30+ pounds. You can easily drop 1-2 pounds a week through calorie counting and exercise (though I guess your options with exercise would be limited).

the crash diet i went on was pretty similar to south beach, but set up from more of a realistic/study-based perspective than a scientific perspective, plus you got 2 free meals a week of wtfever you wanted. all you need to ezmode it is a foreman grill. also it doesn't have a retarded maintenance phase like south beach does (UHHH JUST DO THE DIET, BUT LAZIER, FOR ETERNITY). if you're interested gimme a pm and i'll send it to you.

elx Jan 14th, 2010 08:02 PM

there should be a mockery fitness club :(

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa
People have no idea how much food coloring they take in every day. It's in vitamins, for crying out loud.

I remember one study found that it took a gallon of yellow 5 to cause erectile problems. In a rat.

Soon after, people thought that drinking mountain dew would cause your junk to shrivel.

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 667822)
there should be a mockery fitness club :(

i've been thinking of applying to be a personal trainer at a gym after i get down to my target weight.

people wouldn't like me, though, because i'd just walk them straight to the free weights room, and they'd be all FORD, WHAT ABOUT MY MACHINES

Kitsa Jan 14th, 2010 08:09 PM

Well, I tried to be fair and there is a brand of 100% natural food coloring that I endorse when people ask. And when I had my gallery show last summer, I asked the company for handouts, which they sent. Every time someone came over and tried to pick a fight with me over food coloring (and there were a few), I'd hand them the flyer and tell them about it.

The problem is, the stuff is made with natural spices and vegetable juices and it's always going to taste a little like the original ingredient. So you could end up with vaguely beet-flavored cake icing or something like that and it could be weird. I try to use the natural stuff whenever I can, but sometimes the artificial colorings are unavoidable.

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 08:10 PM

just use the artificial stuff and pretend you use the natural stuff when people ask, imo

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 08:10 PM

I'm pretty limited to speed walking and light weights. My GF is used to this diet and I like it cause I'm all I DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAN AND CAN'T EAT, so she cooks for me.

Chojin Jan 14th, 2010 08:15 PM

well like i said, south beach and lyle's crash diet are very similar, since both are PSMF (protein-sparing modified fasts) that also cut out fat. the big difference is that with lyle's you get free meals (or carb-loading meals, if you're not obese) and you're recommended certain vitamins. the best diet is the one you can stick to, however, so if you're comfortable with south beach, by all means.

I recommend 10,000 IU of Vitamin D3 and 6-8g of fish oil every day for everybody, but when you're on a diet like yours tadao, you should also look into magnesium citrate (not oxide) and potassium - this will help you avoid going into a coma and schiavo'ing the night away (for people who don't have bone problems like yours, taking a calcium supplement is also important to preserve bone density when crash dieting). Get everything in gelcaps, not tablets. Fish oil is pretty hot shit for anyone and does a ton of stuff, from mood improvement to fat burning.

Kitsa Jan 14th, 2010 08:15 PM

The natural stuff is pretty limited in scope...the red is kind of magenta-y, the yellow is kind of mustard-y, and the blue is sort of purple-y. Makes mixing a little more of a pain if you're going for a wide variety of colors. You can do it, it's just harder and it relies more on a pure-white substance to be colored (rice, yogurt, sour cream, cream cheese, etc).

The artificial stuff can make it easy...I can even do stuff in neon colors if I want.

Sam Jan 14th, 2010 08:19 PM

I'M GOING TO COMIC-CON :3

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 08:21 PM

:O did you already register?

bigtimecow Jan 14th, 2010 08:23 PM

what chojin said

Sam Jan 14th, 2010 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 667833)
:O did you already register?

Yes, for Friday. :O

elx Jan 14th, 2010 08:42 PM

did you hear that, jonathan?

LordSappington Jan 14th, 2010 08:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam (Post 667832)
I'M GOING TO COMIC-CON :3

Say hi to my girlfriend for me. :x

Sam Jan 14th, 2010 08:44 PM

:rolleyes

Sam Jan 14th, 2010 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LordSappington (Post 667838)
Say hi to my girlfriend for me. :x

I'll put my dick in her hands if she is nasty enough for it. :x

LordSappington Jan 14th, 2010 08:47 PM

By 'girlfriend', I meant 'she-male Lebanese prostitute', silly.
The market's bigger than you think.

Tadao Jan 14th, 2010 08:52 PM

Sam, is your furry suit finished?

Sam Jan 14th, 2010 08:53 PM

So, you are saying she IS nasty enough.

Tadao: Yes, it's a combination between a nine-tailed fox, Cthulhu, and Crash Man.

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 08:55 PM

FURRIES GET PUSHED IN THE MUD >:

bigtimecow Jan 14th, 2010 08:56 PM

unless they're dressed like mudkip because then they like it :(

elx Jan 14th, 2010 09:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 667845)
FURRIES GET PUSHED IN THE MUD >:

your new avatar is so cuddly :)

bigtimecow Jan 14th, 2010 09:04 PM

i hate it :( you were the one person who's posts i recognized because of a lack of avatar for like ever

Esuohlim Jan 14th, 2010 09:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam (Post 667832)
I'M GOING TO COMIC-CON :3

NERD

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 09:30 PM

BIGTIMECOW I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL CAUSE ILL BE READING POSTS AND ILL BE LIKE, "WHOS THIS FUCKING IDIOT" AND THEN ITS MYSELF :(
OR ILL BE LIKE, "DUDE I POSTED SOME SHIT IN THIS THREAD FUCKING CHOJIN BETTER NOT HAVE DELETED IT"

bigtimecow Jan 14th, 2010 09:33 PM

i mean i guess now all you have to do is look for some stupid duck :/

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 09:35 PM

yea ;/

I JUST LIKE IT CAUSE WHEN I TYPE IN ALL CAPS IT LOOKS LIKE THE DUCK IS YELLING

bigtimecow Jan 14th, 2010 09:36 PM

this is awkward :/

executioneer Jan 14th, 2010 09:39 PM

IM GOING TO COMICON TOO, SAM

MY ONLY COSTUME IS GONNA BE A PAIR OF SHADES B-)

Dixie Jan 14th, 2010 09:42 PM

here's my itinerary, it looks like i'll hit the so called "rust belt"

January 15 Springfield, VA @ Jaxx

January 16 Philadelphia, PA @ Polaris

January 17 New York, NY @ B.B. King Blues Club

January 18 Richmond, VA @ The Hat Factory

January 21 New Orleans, LA @ The Howlin' Wolf

January 22 Orlando, FL @ Club Firestone

January 23 Atlanta, GA @ The Masquerade

January 26 Des Moines, IA @ Vaudeville Mews

January 27 Madison, WI @ High Noon

January 28 Cleveland, OH @ Peabody's

January 29 Detroit, MI @ Blondie's

January 30 Chicago, IL @ Empty Bottle

bigtimecow Jan 14th, 2010 10:15 PM

eh, this show is way too fast paced. jon benjamin is funny of course, but... eh....

(archer)

edit: retracted, it's picking up

kahljorn Jan 14th, 2010 11:14 PM

DR STEWART KAHLJORN WILL BE ATTENDING THE COMIC-CON AS WELL

Sam Jan 15th, 2010 01:16 AM

COMIC-CON WILL BE ATTENDED BY A WIDE CAST OF I-MOCKERY SUPERSTARS

Darryl Jan 15th, 2010 07:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dixie (Post 667861)
here's my itinerary, it looks like i'll hit the so called "rust belt"

January 15 Springfield, VA @ Jaxx

January 16 Philadelphia, PA @ Polaris

January 17 New York, NY @ B.B. King Blues Club

January 18 Richmond, VA @ The Hat Factory

January 21 New Orleans, LA @ The Howlin' Wolf

January 22 Orlando, FL @ Club Firestone

January 23 Atlanta, GA @ The Masquerade

January 26 Des Moines, IA @ Vaudeville Mews

January 27 Madison, WI @ High Noon

January 28 Cleveland, OH @ Peabody's

January 29 Detroit, MI @ Blondie's

January 30 Chicago, IL @ Empty Bottle


Dixie, are you in a band? What is its name?

Dixie Jan 15th, 2010 08:05 AM

i'm not in a band, i'm the merch lady for a short tour
:)

Darryl Jan 15th, 2010 08:09 AM

I looked up who was playing at BB King's on the 17th:

http://www.bbkingblues.com/schedule/...fo.cgi?id=4901
PENTAGRAM
Featuring:
Sp. Guest Openers
The Gates Of Slumber

Dixie Jan 15th, 2010 08:11 AM

yup, those 2 are who i'm working for this time around.
and i'm friggin anxious because i have to ride from raleigh to springfield today and be there by 2, my ride is taking his sweet time and it's making me nuts.

Darryl Jan 15th, 2010 08:17 AM

He needs to get movin'

So you're the chick I'd get to flirt with if I wanted to buy a shirt ;)

Dixie Jan 15th, 2010 08:20 AM

hahaha

yes.

Dixie Jan 15th, 2010 08:27 AM

man, the coffee my room mate's mom made for me today is GODLY.

Kitsa Jan 15th, 2010 09:05 AM

I had a shitty night so I made cinnamon rolls this morning and that makes things a little better.

Darryl Jan 15th, 2010 09:08 AM

What happened, Kitsa?

Kitsa Jan 15th, 2010 09:15 AM

Oh, just another run-to-the-hospital thing, I guess the baby was leaning on my aorta or something and it was (possibly) cutting off blood flow to my brain, among other things.

They took my blood pressure, pronounced it fine, and sent me home, but not before I got to sit on a hard cot in the maternity ER for 4 hours.

Also, the hospital's smack dab in the worst area of town...nightly shootings and all that...so it's a real treat trying to navigate detours through da hood at 2 in the morning.


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