I have a theory about viruses
 

It is my belief that the people who write 90% of the viruses are in fact the same people who sell the anti virus software. I came to this conclusion since most viruses do nothing but spread themselves. They have no other function and the people who wrote them stand to gain nothing from thier existence.... or do they?

Exactly. And the government is creating poverty so that the next Republican president can have something to save.

most viruses don't just spread themselves though :/

Umm....no shit?

not to be an ass, but that's really the ONLY thing that's coming to mind with this. It's believable, no doubt true.

I remember when I was in high school and MSDOS 5.0 just came out, I got a program from a BBS called "VIRUS TOOLKIT". You would select from a list of things you wanted your virus to do and it would generate an infected .com file. We made a virus that infected boot sectors and played "yankee doodle dandee" out of the internal speaker right after the bios finished it's memory test. And unfortunate side effect was the re-mapping of random keys.

Most viruses work to create a vast bot-net of PCs that can be called upon to perform some task. People make money from selling usage time of this bot-net. So for example you can buy a million PCs to perform a denial of service attack on some website for a few days or whatever.

i like the pop up adds that sell pop up blocker software

All your virus problems will be solved with WinAntivirus2009:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kN-xXMLIWds

hurfdurfblurf

Ban this fuck.