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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Dixie Aug 26th, 2009 04:59 AM

this is my second divorce, there really isn't a whole lot available unless you breed irresponsibly, but that's a conversation best left for another part of the forum

Dixie Aug 26th, 2009 05:03 AM

that was kind of harsh,
basically most programs to help people like me out are reserved for people with kids.

kahljorn Aug 26th, 2009 09:07 AM

you can probably qualify for 200+ dollars of cash aid from the welfare office, judging by people I know who have been in a similar situation as you, but sometimes it takes a while to get. Plus you can get on EBT which'll save you a shit load of cash, and you'll eat like a queen and itll make you feel better.

it might be a lot different state to state but that's what you can get here. Having more kids (or people) makes you get more money but you can still qualify.

Aimless Aug 26th, 2009 04:55 PM

have you thought about applying for college and trying to live on campus? they have tons of programs and funding for single people. just a thought.

Dixie Aug 26th, 2009 05:02 PM

actually yes i have, but i don't think i qualify if they base it off my last years taxes

Aimless Aug 26th, 2009 05:05 PM

I'm not exactly sure but I think I have a friend that used their parents when they had a similar problem.. if your parents are jerks that kinda doesn't work. It's worth going and talking to the loan officers at the college.

I would be in your position too but my ex is nice enough to let me live with him while I'm injured :/

Dixie Aug 26th, 2009 05:11 PM

I could live with him, but I don't drive and I need to be close to work. I'm at his house now and I'm 30 minutes from all my friends and work. And even though work is dry right now, something can always pop up so I like to be around just in case.
I had a friend today offer his spare bedroom to me, i might have to take him up on it but I still can't bring my kitties :(

Aimless Aug 26th, 2009 05:13 PM

:( I would hide them.

Dixie Aug 26th, 2009 05:19 PM

Yeah because you can totally hide 2 cats in a 12 x 12 room and them not tear up every goddamn thing.

Dixie Aug 26th, 2009 05:21 PM

I love them but they deserve better since I can't take care of them :(

Aimless Aug 26th, 2009 05:27 PM

It's too bad you don't have someone you trust that can take them in so you could visit them, at least you aren't one of those fucks that just leave their cats outside and don't bother to take them with them when they move.

The Leader Aug 26th, 2009 05:28 PM

I'm sure that you will be able to find someone who will love them as much as you do. :3

Dixie Aug 26th, 2009 05:32 PM

I guess it's good that the hardest part of this breakup is finding the cats a good home.

Kitsa Aug 26th, 2009 07:55 PM

There are no-kill shelters that can assure placement of the cats, if you could find one near you.

There are also cat-playpens on ebay that are big enough for 3 cats and a litterbox. I have one that I use when my guys are in a ransack-the-house-at-night mood. They couldn't be in it 24 hours a day, but it'd be an okay option for a short time if you needed to be out of the house and leave them there. It's about $115 shipped.

MattJack Aug 26th, 2009 07:58 PM

I like it when Dixie is being meaner 'an hell.

If it makes you feel better I lost two cats to an ex that I lived with for a while. We dated for a few years, but I don't know how that compares to marriage.

Kitsa Aug 27th, 2009 01:27 PM

I'm starting to really hate Facebook.

Not only can you not say anything without being monitored by assorted family members with varying degrees of intention, you also have random high school people ( with whom you never got along in the first place) who are using the opportunity to get some quality cyberstalk in.

And the quizzes! God, the fucking quizzes! Am I the only one on the planet who doesn't give a rat's ass what kitchen utensil I am?!? How many surveys can a person fill out about the last person they texted, how many tattoos they have, how many piercings they have, whether they'd have kids with the last person they kissed, and so on?!?!?

I have two FB accounts and I'm sorely tempted to purge the fuck out of one of them. Family you more or less live with, but damned if I want to continue my subscription to the obnoxious blatherings of a college acquaintence I can barely remember.

Tadao Aug 27th, 2009 01:30 PM

Yeah, get email addys from those you care about and delete your facebooks.

Kitsa Aug 27th, 2009 01:34 PM

Well, there are at least two people on one who live quite some distance away, and I want to maintain at least casual contact with them. Not in a bother-them-with-lots-of-emails way, just sort of have them around so if they make some big announcement or something I won't be out of the loop.

That's the main concern, I don't want to drop those two. With the exception of some elementary-school friends I remember fondly, that's about it.

Tadao Aug 27th, 2009 01:40 PM

I think I'm gonna get real drunk today. I apologize now just in case.

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 27th, 2009 01:42 PM

Just don't respond to the rest and don't bother answering the quizes.

The Leader Aug 27th, 2009 01:56 PM

I just tell everyone how stupid they are with my facebook. :/

Kitsa Aug 27th, 2009 02:07 PM

in a lot of ways it's even worse than myspace :(

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 27th, 2009 02:12 PM

at least you don't get friend requests from people like "Staci Wetlips" or "Rock Hardchest"

Tadao Aug 27th, 2009 02:24 PM

I'm gonna wind up playing James Taylor songs on my guitar and wishing things went different.

Kitsa Aug 27th, 2009 02:52 PM

I have a bunch of twitter requests that turn out to be some sort of fucked-up German porn. I'm not too keen on twitter, either.

Tadao Aug 27th, 2009 03:18 PM

Hahahaha, I'm always amazed that the time spent sending animal porn links at random = positive revenue.

Sam Aug 27th, 2009 04:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 644337)
at least you don't get friend requests from people like "Staci Wetlips" or "Rock Hardchest"

I knew you got my friend request. :(

Kitsa Aug 27th, 2009 05:10 PM

I'm really hoping I didn't just break my big toe. Stupid George Foreman grill fell out of the pantry from a height of about 2 feet, I took the entire force of it on my toe.

I think I can bend it, but the only sensation coming through is a sort of stinging throb.

WhiteRat Aug 27th, 2009 06:53 PM

oy i just soiled me knickers

Tadao Aug 27th, 2009 06:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WhiteRat (Post 644373)
oy i just soiled me knickers


10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 27th, 2009 07:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam (Post 644352)
I knew you got my friend request. :(

Send another one or find me on the facebook. Just put SAM = Staci Wetlips this time :)


I normally don't take the facebook quizes but I did one yesterday.
People who you want to star in a bio-pic movie about your life.

1) You - Jason Schwartzman
2) Love interest - Caroline Rhea
3) Best friend - Chris Benoit
4) Parent - Gilbert Gottfried
5) Enemy - Nancy Grace

Dimnos Aug 27th, 2009 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 644376)

1) You - Jason Schwartzman
2) Love interest - Caroline Rhea
3) Best friend - Chris Benoit
4) Parent - Gilbert Gottfried
5) Enemy - Nancy Grace

I would pay to see that. :lol

Dimnos Aug 27th, 2009 07:22 PM

Except Nancy Grace would probably make money off it. :(

Tadao Aug 27th, 2009 07:43 PM

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/

:(

Wiffles Aug 27th, 2009 08:08 PM

lol, Walmart is indeed a wonderous place full of interesting people. Big-lots has nice variety of species too ^.^

kahljorn Aug 27th, 2009 08:34 PM

that really fat lady doing the splits is crazy :( she looks like if she didn't have a wall in back of her she would just bobble around like one of those kid punching bags :(

Otto Aug 27th, 2009 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 644376)

I normally don't take the facebook quizes but I did one yesterday.
People who you want to star in a bio-pic movie about your life.

1) You - Jason Schwartzman
2) Love interest - Caroline Rhea
3) Best friend - Chris Benoit
4) Parent - Gilbert Gottfried
5) Enemy - Nancy Grace

I did the same thing yesterday!
It went like this:
1) Me - Robert Crumb
2) Love interest - Bjork
3) Best friend - Tom Waits
4) Parent - Vincent Price
5) Enemy - Joe Don Baker

b_squared Aug 28th, 2009 12:29 AM

I agree with you kitsa about the facebook thing. I blocked requests and posts and still I got invites to the quizes and games. I hate the save the rainforest...save the whales etc apps. I don't see how clicking and sending pixel fish is saving anything.
I deleted my account last month.

Aaarg Aug 28th, 2009 12:35 AM

I think I have 70 friends on Facebook and almost 20 are set to "hide from news feed." So basically the only updates I see are from people who never do anything on Facebook. I like it.


I don't like when you're planning on visiting your old town because a bunch of people who you don't like expect you to make time to see them.

Call me while I'm in town and if I'm not busy maybe we can hang out.

I'm really going home to visit my nieces and the rest of my family, though I definitely went out of my way to ensure I'd see my old buddy Jon. Our plans, as of now, are "saturday night" and "smoking pot." We'll see what comes of it.

Aimless Aug 28th, 2009 04:15 AM

I always wanted vincent price to be my dad too <3

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 28th, 2009 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dimnos (Post 644379)
Except Nancy Grace would probably make money off it. :(

I would make sure she didn't get a dime.

MarioRPG Aug 28th, 2009 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 644384)

Just saw that yesterday... Kinda gross sometimes.

Kitsa Aug 28th, 2009 01:14 PM

I would have taken a pic for that site today if I had my camera ready in time. There was this lady who looked like she was 75 or so...at least 75...in spike heels, black hose and a black miniskirt.

The weird thing was that, from the shoulders down, it looked right. She had great legs, even. But then you looked at her face and... holy shit, it's great-grandma. She was tottering out to her car with a cake box.

Tadao Aug 28th, 2009 06:30 PM

http://punditkitchen.files.wordpress...pg?w=340&h=450

Supafly345 Aug 28th, 2009 08:52 PM

are you being ironic

Colonel Flagg Aug 28th, 2009 10:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 644523)

Good one. :rock

MattJack Aug 29th, 2009 12:57 AM

hey whatch'yall doin?

MattJack Aug 29th, 2009 01:13 AM

that's cool.

I think Wiffles is a character, what aboutch'yall?

The Leader Aug 29th, 2009 01:16 AM

I'm doing well, MattJack. Thank you for asking.

I don't believe that Wiffles is a character. Just a very sad person.

MattJack Aug 29th, 2009 01:22 AM

No problemo mi amigo.

Yeah I'm split on that tbh. One half says she's a character, but the other half says she's a Girl Gone Wild on the Internet Forumz.

Fathom Zero Aug 29th, 2009 01:55 AM

I DON'T THINK THEY ARE. BUT I BELIEVE A LOT OF THINKS

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 29th, 2009 06:19 AM

Just getting home, it's about 5:20 AM debating whether to have another beer, don't have to work tomorrow. Anyone up?

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 29th, 2009 06:21 AM

Aimless, I think I was promised dinner, what happened to that?

executioneer Aug 29th, 2009 06:53 AM

i gotta bring an actual video camera to kareoke next time, the audio recording sucks a million shits on this cellphone

Aaarg Aug 29th, 2009 09:54 AM

there was a five-lined skink inside the store last night. i put him back outside, protecting him from getting stomped by a fat redneck or a fat indian.

Kitsa Aug 29th, 2009 11:14 AM

Speaking of fat rednecks, I just saw a pickup-truckload of them slow down to take the number of a house for rent across the street.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I'm fucking surrounded :(

Zhukov Aug 29th, 2009 11:34 AM

I always seem to run into fat people that are also short. I think it's because off all the cigarettes they smoked as babies.

The "redneck" people are great; environmentalists whom are well spoken and keep healthy. It's the city dwellers that I hate.

Kitsa Aug 29th, 2009 12:13 PM

I don't have a problem with any number of individual redneck traits. I think Jeff Foxworthy described it best as a "glorious lack of sophistication", on the whole, that defines rednecks around here.

The thing that I hate most about the ones in the area is general selfishness. Selfishness is a big irritation point with me.

Aimless Aug 29th, 2009 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 644602)
Aimless, I think I was promised dinner, what happened to that?

You never showed, can't say I blame you... I'm nowhere near as hot as twister girl.

Tadao Aug 29th, 2009 03:18 PM

I never liked the way twister girl looked.

Tadao Aug 29th, 2009 03:23 PM

BTW, we don't need Sparkles Fairy, we have Wiffles and SF is just a cheap rip off of an already established entity. Wiffles did it's time and you guys are just gonna let this fagot fag things up?

Aimless Aug 29th, 2009 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 644640)
I never liked the way twister girl looked.

You never liked the way I looked either. *cry*

Tadao Aug 29th, 2009 04:29 PM

Well yeah, but this isn't about you.

Dixie Aug 29th, 2009 04:48 PM

Fuck yeah!
Kenney Chesney tomorrow!
good god, i never thought i'd be saying that

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 07:30 PM

Quick Question: Who is MajorScales?

With everyone changing their names I didn't see who that one was.

elx Aug 29th, 2009 07:51 PM

pub lover! :)

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 07:53 PM

I severely doubt that MajorScales is Pub Lover. ;)


ELX! :love

Wiffles Aug 29th, 2009 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 644683)
Quick Question: Who is MajorScales?

With everyone changing their names I didn't see who that one was.

check out his youtube channel, maybe youll reconise him http://www.youtube.com/user/martyman5000

i think he's noob3 or something ^^;;

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wiffles (Post 644702)
check out his youtube channel, maybe youll reconise him http://www.youtube.com/user/martyman5000

i think he's noob3 or something ^^;;

OMG! Wiffles, that is Fartin Mowler! He is Canadian! He mows lawns for his job. :)

noob3 is from Kansas or somesuch state & is called Chuck & has no job because is a bacon eating stoner. :)

Wiffles Aug 29th, 2009 08:01 PM

Who knew! ^.^

Tadao Aug 29th, 2009 08:28 PM

Is it really? Fartin?

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 08:35 PM

That youtube channel that Wiffles posted sure is Fartin. Where did MajorScales claim to be him?

Fathom Zero Aug 29th, 2009 08:36 PM

noob3 is from Oklahoma like me! :3

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 08:40 PM

Yeah, one of those pointless middle ones. ;)

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 08:41 PM

:pagebrak

Chojin Aug 29th, 2009 09:03 PM

yes, majorscales is fartin.

MajorScales Aug 29th, 2009 09:14 PM

:\ Hi Pub :)

Chojin Aug 29th, 2009 09:18 PM

sup f

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 644721)
yes, majorscales is fartin.

Thank you! :)
Quote:

Originally Posted by MajorScales (Post 644723)
:\ Hi Pub :)

Hullo Fartin. :)

Wiffles Aug 29th, 2009 09:22 PM

waii waii, welcome back FM ^.^

MajorScales Aug 29th, 2009 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 644724)
sup f

Hey Chojin, how is Jin?

Colonel Flagg Aug 29th, 2009 09:58 PM

Welcome Back Pub. :)

Nice to meet you FM. :)

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 10:04 PM

Who says I left, Colonel? :eek

Seriously, just because I don't post doesn't mean I ain't watching you guys. ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by MajorScales (Post 644737)
someone has to ruin it :\

That was me! Your kids are hot, but this isn't my hebephilic account. :x

Sup, ELX. ;) :love ;)

elx Aug 29th, 2009 10:06 PM

i missed you dearly

Colonel Flagg Aug 29th, 2009 10:39 PM

Damn. Pub, looks like you gots another groupie!

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 11:18 PM

The kids are only polite to me because they know I'll go to their house & stab them in their sleep if they misbehave. ;)

Wiffles Aug 29th, 2009 11:19 PM

creepytastic o.o

Pub Lover Aug 29th, 2009 11:28 PM

Absolutely, My Little Cheez-Puff. <3

Wiffles Aug 29th, 2009 11:35 PM

I know we'd make a great team ;)

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 30th, 2009 01:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aimless (Post 644639)
You never showed, can't say I blame you... I'm nowhere near as hot as twister girl.

Oh,but you're hotter. Still waiting for dinner.

Aimless Aug 30th, 2009 01:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 644798)
Oh,but you're hotter. Still waiting for dinner.

Flattery for food, are you that hungry? I'm making thai food tomorrow. *wink*

Wiffles Aug 30th, 2009 01:59 AM

That sounds absolutely delish-ums, I bet you are a good chef ^.^

Fathom Zero Aug 30th, 2009 02:06 AM

I want to vommmmmit.

Aimless Aug 30th, 2009 02:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 644803)
I want to vommmmmit.


have something against thai food? food racist.

Fathom Zero Aug 30th, 2009 02:41 AM

No, I love Thai, baby. It's just I've got a lotta shit going on right now and it makes me wanna vommmmmmit.

Wiffles Aug 30th, 2009 02:44 AM

You should tell us, so we can help you or maybe give advice :)

Sam Aug 30th, 2009 02:49 AM

Fathom, tell your old buddy Sam all abouttttttt ittttttt.

Fathom Zero Aug 30th, 2009 02:59 AM

No, babes, I'm going to a parrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrty. Awwwww yeah.

DevilWearsPrada Aug 30th, 2009 03:05 AM

always marked you down as one of those kids who rolled their eyes at the "other kids" who drank underage because you're better than that

DevilWearsPrada Aug 30th, 2009 03:06 AM

Also, I just realized that I've had this account for a year now. I'm not proud of it :(


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