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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Dimnos Mar 31st, 2011 02:56 PM

Mr. Gills

Tadao Mar 31st, 2011 04:43 PM

fuck you

Guitar Woman Mar 31st, 2011 06:10 PM

What up, motherfuckers?

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 31st, 2011 06:38 PM

Its super hard to find those french cigarette holders that aren't garbage GW. As a smoker I hope you realize this.

Fathom Zero Mar 31st, 2011 06:43 PM

Opus X Fuente Fuentes

where it's at.


To smoke anything else is such a sadness.

Chojin Mar 31st, 2011 06:45 PM

some students renting out equipment from me just got an eyeful of fathom's hairless, elfen figure

i'm gonna start banning for it unless people start mspainting clothes on him

Fathom Zero Mar 31st, 2011 06:47 PM

hulolololol

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 31st, 2011 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 716485)
some students renting out equipment from me just got an eyeful of fathom's hairless, elfen figure

i'm gonna start banning for it unless people start mspainting clothes on him

That was up onetime and my gf walked by and noticed it. I was right about to explain but she was just kinda like "Nope." and then she walked away.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 716484)
Opus X Fuente Fuentes

where it's at.

To smoke anything else is such a sadness.

I think we met the lady on this website

in the top left while at this bar in california during comic con.

MLE Mar 31st, 2011 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 716489)
That was up onetime and my gf walked by and noticed it. I was right about to explain but she was just kinda like "Nope." and then she walked away.

That is fantastic.

Guitar Woman Mar 31st, 2011 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 716483)
Its super hard to find those french cigarette holders that aren't garbage GW. As a smoker I hope you realize this.

I was just buying these meerschaum pipes my local tobacconist sells and ripping the stems off, since they have a perfectly-sized indentation for holding cigarettes. Plus I could flip them upside down while they were loaded so they'd curve upwards and keep the smoke away from my nose and eyes, wheras most cigarette holders are straight and gay

They're really fucking tiny though, I've lost two of them because they fell out of my pockets. Also, I stopped buying them because I'm definitely really going to quit smoking as soon as I get a break from work and don't have to think for 3 or 4 days, and I didn't want to look like an HST poser even though I kinda am

as a bonus crafts project I'd usually make a new stem for the orphaned bowl so I could use it for wacky tobacky

Fathom Zero Mar 31st, 2011 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 716489)
I think we met the lady on this website

in the top left while at this bar in california during comic con.

:lol And Fuente Fuentes were cheaper when I had a couple. :eek

Tadao Mar 31st, 2011 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 716485)
some students renting out equipment from me just got an eyeful of fathom's hairless, elfen figure

:lol How do you explain something like that.

Pub Lover Mar 31st, 2011 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 716485)
some students renting out equipment from me just got an eyeful of fathom's hairless, elfen figure

i'm gonna start banning for it unless people start mspainting clothes on him

Crybaby.

Esuohlim Mar 31st, 2011 10:14 PM

I always seem to be in a public place when liquidstatik posts pictures of what looks like 12 year old girls covered in cum

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 31st, 2011 10:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 716493)
I was just buying these meerschaum pipes my local tobacconist sells and ripping the stems off, since they have a perfectly-sized indentation for holding cigarettes. Plus I could flip them upside down while they were loaded so they'd curve upwards and keep the smoke away from my nose and eyes, wheras most cigarette holders are straight and gay

Damn bisexuals.

kahljorn Mar 31st, 2011 10:23 PM

god damned bisexual fag handlers

Chojin Apr 1st, 2011 04:09 AM

so youtube's april fools thing is a filter that makes videos look like silent films with jaunty music.

i immediately tried to watch some japan tsunami footage with the 1911 filter on, but it was disabled. :< however to my delight, 9/11 is still apparently fair game. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgm8dNJvM6k

executioneer Apr 1st, 2011 04:27 AM

i still think this is a funnier/more awful youtube filter :x

Chojin Apr 1st, 2011 08:10 AM

today i-bapery is the default theme

all the cool members of this board will not notice a change in operations

Mockery Apr 1st, 2011 08:16 AM

This action has been approved by the I-Mockery administration.

:ibapery

Chojin Apr 1st, 2011 08:17 AM

next year's theme: i-cockery, starring pub lover and fathom zero

Fathom Zero Apr 1st, 2011 09:22 AM

I need to take more pictures in preparation.

LordSappington Apr 1st, 2011 12:24 PM

Nothing more calming than expecting to see a nice shade of gray and getting BLOOD RED

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 12:28 PM

I think the change is appropriate, since it's not really the same forum as it was 5 or 6 years ago

Not entirely sure if that's a good thing or not.

Fathom Zero Apr 1st, 2011 12:30 PM

it used to be so internet and now it's all jaded

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 12:32 PM

We used to have fun here, man

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 12:34 PM

I remember 10 years ago. Things and stuff was so much different 10 years ago.

Fathom Zero Apr 1st, 2011 12:39 PM

I DON'T WANT TODAY. I WANT YESTERDAY. BECAUSE YESTERDAY I KNOW. AND TODAY IS... NEW! >:

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 12:42 PM

Some of you might not remember this, but 20 years ago was very different from today. I mean I expected it to be the same and stuff, but fuck dude! Some how we lost control and things got all different and stuff.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 01:14 PM

I think the difference is that Tadao wasn't here being an unfunny, bitter jackass 6 years ago

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 01:43 PM

:lol I'ts funny watching a little kid grow into an emo and then into a hipster. What next GW? You gonna go all bad boy on us?

elx Apr 1st, 2011 01:58 PM

april fools is internet-everywhere this year :(


youtube/google, thepiratebay, xkcd, thinkgeek, hulu, funnyordie (THIS WAS THE WORST,) urban dictionary, wikipedia.. were ok. maddox wins though.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 02:14 PM

Mind you, I'm not saying the forums were less full of assholes back then, but they were hilarious assholes with big fuzzy secret hearts.

I'm sorta just posting here because it's a habit now; most of the people I legitimately liked have vanished into the ether. I'm starting to miss Gadzooks, even, and I fucking hated that guy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 716547)
hipster




Hipsters are disciples of the school of postmodernism, which, if my art history teacher is to be believed, has the general philosophy "Everything good ever has already been made, so why even bother to fucking try anymore? Let's just copy things other people have already done, but make sure to explicitly point that out so everyone knows it's ironic."

This is just such a pessimistic and self-defeating outlook on doing anything that it makes me want to vomit. Yes, if you write something, Shakespeare's probably beat you to it, yes, if you make a heavy metal song, Sabbath or Zeppelin did it first, but anyone who thinks that excuses them from putting every ounce of effort they have into doing something is a fucking loser.

So, fuck you, Tadao, I'm not a hipster. I fucking work for a living.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 02:57 PM

So you're telling me that your excuse as to why you haven't made anyone here laugh in the last 2 years is because I post here. Wow dude, could you be any more of a pussy?

Why is it that hipsters always think they are different from other hipsters. A group of people who take things from the past and claim it as their persona is a vicious circle GW, try to move on to the next phase in your life before you get sucked deeper into the vortex.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:07 PM

I did learn something new today. High school art teachers have PHDs is sociology.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:14 PM

I don't do comedy, son.

Also, yes, how dare I identify with the culture and circumstances I was around during my major emotional development! You bastard, you literally cannot ever look back fondly on things in the past! Which isn't to say that I'm not looking fondly at the present, either. There are always loads of cool and interesting things happening everywhere, you kinda just have to keep watch for them. I-Mockery's changed pretty drastically, though, and it doesn't push my buttons like it used to.

Also, calling people "hipster" is just an easy, lazy insult. It's become some sort of cultural taboo to be a hipster, and it's pretty much an all-purpose slur for anyone you don't like the viewpoint of. It barely has meaning anymore.

Of course, you're what, 40? Getting on in years? Not as sprightly as you used to be? Can't think straight? Meth'll do that, you know. I don't blame you for being bloated and workshy.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:14 PM

I get it now! You were being ironic!

Only a hipster would think that his art teacher can give him definitive explanation on what a hipster is.

That would probably get you the hipster of the month award. You probably stole it from another forum though. :(

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 716553)
I don't do comedy, son.

Calling someone 20 years older than you son. How ironic!

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:21 PM

lol, why did you edit that out of your post?

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:22 PM

Even your insults are recycled from other posters. :(

The Leader Apr 1st, 2011 03:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 716550)
Hipsters are disciples of the school of postmodernism, which, if my art history teacher is to be believed, has the general philosophy "Everything good ever has already been made, so why even bother to fucking try anymore? Let's just copy things other people have already done, but make sure to explicitly point that out so everyone knows it's ironic."

This is just such a pessimistic and self-defeating outlook on doing anything that it makes me want to vomit. Yes, if you write something, Shakespeare's probably beat you to it, yes, if you make a heavy metal song, Sabbath or Zeppelin did it first, but anyone who thinks that excuses them from putting every ounce of effort they have into doing something is a fucking loser.

So, fuck you, Tadao, I'm not a hipster. I fucking work for a living.

This looks like something a hipster would write.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:23 PM

Kahl hasn't called me a fat mexican in a year. Maybe you can sneak that into your next post.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:24 PM

Aren't you a fat malaysian, though?

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:31 PM

That wasn't ironic at all. Of course you avatar of Hunter S. Thompson more than makes up for it. He's probably the reason you are so eager to smoke an elongated cigarette filter.

That's not hipster at all, then again, we haven't consulted you art teacher on it yet.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:39 PM

Why wouldn't I imitate one of my idols, Hunter especially? He's fucking awesome.

Before HST I pretty much didn't give a shit about anything and had no idea what I wanted to do after high-school. Then I started reading Thompson's shite, and he just made journalism sound so fucking cool; I think it's absolutely brilliant even when you take away all of his drugs, mayhem, and vulgarity. Chasing a story, compiling it into a comprehensible article, the back-and-forth with the editor that makes it near-perfect, that's all literally better than sex to me.

So, yes, despite all the crazy things HST did during his life, what really makes him a hero to me is that turned me on to the career I'd love the best; he also had a serious passion for everything he did, and I strive to emulate that more than anything else, but that won't stop me from also using mind-altering substances because I like the cut of their jib, or from using a stubby cigarette holder because I think it makes me look cool.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 716493)
I was just buying these meerschaum pipes my local tobacconist sells and ripping the stems off, since they have a perfectly-sized indentation for holding cigarettes. Plus I could flip them upside down while they were loaded so they'd curve upwards and keep the smoke away from my nose and eyes, wheras most cigarette holders are straight and gay

They're really fucking tiny though, I've lost two of them because they fell out of my pockets. Also, I stopped buying them because I'm definitely really going to quit smoking as soon as I get a break from work and don't have to think for 3 or 4 days, and I didn't want to look like an HST poser even though I kinda am

as a bonus crafts project I'd usually make a new stem for the orphaned bowl so I could use it for wacky tobacky

OH THE IRONY

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:41 PM

EVERYTHING HAS ALREADY BEEN DONE SO I'LL BE LIKE SOMEONE ELSE.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:43 PM

You... haven't been reading anything I've been saying, huh?

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:44 PM

Another thing I learned today. Hunter S. Thompson was cool because of his look. His writing is not to be considered when trying to emulate him.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:46 PM

Well, no, of course you haven't been reading my posts, you're just an old tweaker spoiling for a fight, childishly slapping your ass and chanting schoolyard taunt songs.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 716566)
Another thing I learned today. Hunter S. Thompson was cool because of his look. His writing is not to be considered when trying to emulate him.

His writing style is brilliant, but no, I don't attempt to emulate it. I write what comes naturally to me, not other people.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:48 PM



Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 716565)
You... haven't been reading anything I've been saying, huh?

Why would I come to a comedy forum to read boring ass text about why you think you are not a douche bag.

I came here to play. What the fuck is wrong with you GW. Maybe it's not the site that isn't fun, maybe it's you that is keeping yourself from having fun.

Oh geez, WAY TO BE A FUCKING DOWNER ON APRIL FOOLS DAY.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:50 PM

Right, so I was completely correct about how immature and retarded you are. Thanks.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 716567)
Well, no, of course you haven't been reading my posts, you're just an old tweaker spoiling for a fight, childishly slapping your ass and chanting schoolyard taunt songs.


Spoiling for a fight? Oh god, how ironic of you to use old timey speak.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao
ironic!
ironic!
IRONIC
IRONY
ironic


Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 716570)
Right, so I was completely correct about how immature and retarded you are. Thanks.

I'm glad you found your dads pants and all, to bad he was probably a depressing little shit from Portland as well. You should move.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 03:58 PM

I was thinking Australia, a place that's cool as hell, but they're pretty huge bastards about video games down there.

Also, kratom's illegal. Fuck that, no way I'm giving up my best chemical friend in the world.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 04:13 PM

They are also very racist, so you can forget about hooking up with anyone other than white.

Guitar Woman Apr 1st, 2011 04:14 PM

Relationships are an overrated waste of time, so I'd be fine if there were no women on the enitre continent.

Not gay.

Otto Apr 1st, 2011 06:48 PM

I have never tried kratom, I think it's time to head on down to my local head shop.

Kitsa Apr 1st, 2011 08:15 PM

Not too long ago, I did read something by someone who was trying to half-emulate Hunter S. Thompson and the other half was maybe Tom Wolfe or some such shit. It was so annoying and miserable I couldn't get through five pages.

Otto Apr 1st, 2011 08:58 PM

I love some of Thompson's work, but I have to admit I find myself full of contempt for people that try to emulate his writing. Plus cigarette holders, aviator shades and safari hats make people look goofy as fuck.

What was it that you tried to read, Kitsa?

Kitsa Apr 1st, 2011 09:03 PM

This.

It was absolutely godawful, the part that I tried to read (which was an advance copy sort of so maybe he changed something, but I doubt it). It was immediately obvious that Liberties Were Taken and it was just basically painful to even attempt.

I also have one hell of a hard time with people who take themselves too seriously, and he does.

Kitsa Apr 1st, 2011 09:07 PM

Also, the only person who could ever truly pull off HST was HST. Now people should stop. The jersey has been retired.

I read something about Bill Murray and Johnny Depp both becoming assholes after staying with him to do research for the biopics. They did okay in their own way, but people just focus on the wacky and lose sight of the whole picture.

I think one of my favorite HST events was the interview in which he was trying to speak rationally and calmly to a crazed Hell's Angel who was heckling him. You don't see any of that Hunter S. Thompson in all of the reenactments.

Chojin Apr 1st, 2011 10:35 PM

gw has gotten much better at MOCK WARRRRing

MarioRPG Apr 1st, 2011 10:41 PM

It's shameful how long that it took me to log in to this place just because I couldn't do it off the main page. I'm pretty sure that it wasn't worth it, however.
e: esp after reading this page and the one before it.

Tadao Apr 1st, 2011 11:05 PM

Remember 2 pages ago when this place was so much more fun, we'll never get back to the good old days of two pages ago.

executioneer Apr 1st, 2011 11:10 PM

nostalgia isn't what it used to be #thingsyogiberramighthavesaid

Guitar Woman Apr 2nd, 2011 12:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 716592)
Remember 2 pages ago when this place was so much more fun, we'll never get back to the good old days of two pages ago.

Ok, this was funny.

MAYBE YOU'RE NOT SUCH A BAD GUY AFTER ALL.

Dimnos Apr 2nd, 2011 12:55 AM

Awww... You guys are going to make up. :)

kahljorn Apr 2nd, 2011 01:17 AM

THIS SHITS SO GONZXO

executioneer Apr 2nd, 2011 01:26 AM

oh man what if gonzo from the muppet show did a hunter s thompson impression

HOLY SHIT

Esuohlim Apr 2nd, 2011 02:29 AM

:lol

SECRAT EDIT:
Spoilers!

Fathom Zero Apr 2nd, 2011 02:40 AM

People don't know the difference between the James Bond Theme and the 007 Theme. It makes it a bitch to find the later on Youtube.

Chojin Apr 2nd, 2011 02:45 AM

the theme is switched back now. i hope all 6 of you affected appreciated this little event.

Pentegarn Apr 2nd, 2011 07:05 AM

There's that many around still?

Fathom Zero Apr 2nd, 2011 08:53 AM

Good morning, ever'body!


10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 2nd, 2011 03:14 PM

Man, I have this awesome idea for art thread submission but I need to get a clip of something first.

Fathom Zero Apr 2nd, 2011 03:28 PM

Ugh. This Svedka tastes horrible. Though, I suppose it serves a purpose. So I'll take it.

Tadao Apr 2nd, 2011 04:04 PM

I'm sure it will taste better in 3015 or some shit.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 2nd, 2011 04:29 PM

Svedka is real bad. You might be able to mix it with some regular vodka though and have it taste a little better.

Otto Apr 2nd, 2011 04:44 PM

I think I'm going to quit smoking cigarettes, I can't find a brand that I like anymore. I started with Chesterfields and now I can't find them anymore, then I switched to Lucky Strikes and they disappeared, then I started smoking Drum tobacco and now I can't find it either.

Tadao Apr 2nd, 2011 04:58 PM

Bali Shag is a Drum replacement.

Tadao Apr 2nd, 2011 05:00 PM

Not a great one though, but the closest there is. I'm 3 weeks nicotine free as of today. Been on Chantix for a month. Chantix makes me really sick in the tummy so I'm going to stop taking it today.

Guitar Woman Apr 2nd, 2011 05:12 PM

American Spirit Periques are goddamned good, but you might have to look a little to find them.

Phoenix Gamma Apr 2nd, 2011 07:48 PM

My friend and I share the same birthday. We celebrated together last year.

This year, he's getting an early surprise party to "show how much we love him".

I was invited to said party :(

Instead of saying anything and being open about my feelings at the risk of being a huge downer, I'm gonna do the mature thing and stay home tonight, drink, and play video games in a downward spiral of depression. :D

elx Apr 2nd, 2011 10:15 PM

happy early birthday Phoenix Gamma!



here are some awesome friends to make you feel better!

Zhukov Apr 2nd, 2011 10:23 PM

I genuinely hate birthdays, so I actually don't mind when nobody remembers. Literally nobody remembers :(

elx Apr 2nd, 2011 10:59 PM

do you not have a facebook? :(

Phoenix Gamma Apr 2nd, 2011 11:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 716651)
do you not have a facebook? :(

That's how I was invited :(

All Hail Duke Apr 2nd, 2011 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 716649)
I genuinely hate birthdays, so I actually don't mind when nobody remembers.

word

Esuohlim Apr 3rd, 2011 01:32 AM

DON'T WORRY PHOENIX GAMMA I'M GOING TO LIGHT ONE UP TODAY IN YOUR HONOR :blunts

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 3rd, 2011 01:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 716649)
I genuinely hate birthdays, so I actually don't mind when nobody remembers. Literally nobody remembers :(

Parently I'm a nobody :(

Happy birthday phoenix.

R npgeeds to fix the birthday calender cuz it y2ked fire real.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 3rd, 2011 02:27 AM

I'm at this dance club with bam margera with all these annoying people. These stuck up bitches kept getting in the way so I ripped ass next to them to knock them down a peg.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 3rd, 2011 03:26 AM

How dare everyone else have something better to do than me.

Fathom Zero Apr 3rd, 2011 03:38 AM

The Svedka made me decide to sleep at noon. I'm just lurking around now. My apartment went to see Sucker Punch without me.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 3rd, 2011 03:54 AM

Man you're far better off at home. Watching sucker punch reminded me of lilith fair. The one chick looked like a hot ramza from tactics though.

Fathom Zero Apr 3rd, 2011 03:59 AM

lol

Maybe I'll watch it when it comes to the Redbox or something.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 3rd, 2011 04:02 AM

Its beautiful garbage.

Kitsa Apr 3rd, 2011 09:41 AM

I thought she looked like Holly Madison sort of.

I watched a bunch of war documentaries yesterday because THAT'S HOW FUN I AM


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