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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Tadao Aug 18th, 2011 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 738386)
I'm only breakin' yer balls, I'm only kiddin' witcha.

Post #80000


Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy yy

Fathom Zero Aug 18th, 2011 03:22 PM

Such a milestone deserves to be memorialized with a Billy Batts quote.

Tadao Aug 18th, 2011 04:04 PM

I'd prefer man nipples.


Fathom Zero Aug 18th, 2011 04:41 PM

Okay, there.

Tadao Aug 18th, 2011 04:48 PM

It's amazing how Pubs nipples can liven up a post!

HickMan Aug 18th, 2011 07:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 738597)
I'll give him a green pickle if he updates his signature.

No way brah it's too funny

Grislygus Aug 18th, 2011 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by b_squared (Post 738610)
For a fight at comic con, its mandatory you wear cos play costumes.


SHUT YOUR GODDAMNED MOUTH

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 18th, 2011 09:33 PM

She's not a bartender.

Fathom Zero Aug 18th, 2011 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by k0k0 (Post 738657)
Take a hint from Don Carlson, Portland Oregon animator: There's always murder. Because the only thing that can give you a true boner is the scent of a dead woman/child's blood.

Don Carlson, the homosexual, bigoted pyromaniac from Portland, Oregon.

HickMan Aug 19th, 2011 04:58 AM

sounds like a cool cat

Esuohlim Aug 19th, 2011 05:54 AM

This reminds me of Pram




Fathom Zero Aug 19th, 2011 06:23 AM

:lol

Zomboid Aug 19th, 2011 12:48 PM

That's fucking hilarious. Where did you find that?

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 19th, 2011 02:14 PM

Wedding photo at the bottom is the best.

YOU HAVE GIVEN OUT TOO MUCH REPPICKLES IN THE LAST 24 HOURS.

Colonel Flagg Aug 19th, 2011 02:57 PM

The only thing that wedding photo needs is a shot of pedo-bear.

Rongi Aug 19th, 2011 03:00 PM

Except that it doesn't need an over exposed internet meme at all

k0k0 Aug 19th, 2011 03:27 PM

Anyone see the advertisements that pop up on the top of the screen with this guy on it?
<-----
He makes me laugh every time I see it. Was gonna keep my dennis avatar til sunny came back on, but when I saw that guy in the ad this time, looking all stupid and fed up, I had to have him.

b_squared Aug 19th, 2011 05:23 PM

Never saw the ad, but I like it as a avatar.

Colonel Flagg Aug 19th, 2011 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rongi (Post 738751)
Except that it doesn't need an over exposed internet meme at all

Actually, that's EXACTLY what it needs.

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 20th, 2011 01:38 AM

Bitches

Shyandquietguy Aug 20th, 2011 01:53 AM

So I'm not much for alcohol. I only drink a beer and that's only if the taste is either awesome or just bearable.

I'm bored of beer so I decided to venture and found whiskey.

Black Velvet. And it nearly knocked me flat when it touched my lips.

Thank god I hate getting blasted or the down stair neighbors would be pissed.

k0k0 Aug 20th, 2011 01:55 AM

Whenever I used to drink, the only thing that really appealed to my taste was wine. I didn't enjoy drinking much else. If I wanted to get really drunk, I'd drink rum and coke, but even that I didn't really enjoy as much as wine.

Esuohlim Aug 20th, 2011 05:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zomboid (Post 738736)
That's fucking hilarious. Where did you find that?

One of my friends posted it on Facebook. Just the image, not a source or any background info

WhiteRat Aug 20th, 2011 05:56 AM

I bartended a wedding tonight in which the brides maides (striking dames if I may say) clamped their buttcheeks around a quarter and tried to walk it to and drop it into a cup. Needless to say it was very arousing.

Fathom Zero Aug 20th, 2011 06:50 AM

http://braderunner.ytmnd.com/

Tadao Aug 20th, 2011 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WhiteRat (Post 738834)
I bartended a wedding tonight in which the brides maides (striking dames if I may say) clamped their buttcheeks around a quarter and tried to walk it to and drop it into a cup. Needless to say it was very arousing.

Yeah, well, I'd like to see them try that with my cock.

Tadao Aug 20th, 2011 10:12 AM

:(

Shrubfest Aug 20th, 2011 10:30 AM

I think you'll find that's called 'The penny up the bum game' here in England. :tophat

Womti Aug 20th, 2011 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 738862)
Yeah, well, I'd like to see them try that with my cock.

:lol

Tadao Aug 20th, 2011 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shrubfest (Post 738864)
I think you'll find that's called 'The penny up the bum game' here in England. :tophat

A penny for your twat.

HickMan Aug 20th, 2011 02:55 PM

I'm obviously in the wrong line of work

Rongi Aug 20th, 2011 03:51 PM

These jeans I just got in the mail were made by REAL PRISONERS :eek

http://www.unionlabel.com/prison-blues-jeans.html

Also they look sexy as all hell



10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 20th, 2011 04:05 PM

But I bet you wear them it'll get their dna all over you. Then you'll get arrested for crimes. Then you'll be making the prison jeans yourself.

Pentegarn Aug 20th, 2011 04:12 PM

That's why I won't wear clothing worn by former president Clinton

Rongi Aug 20th, 2011 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 738894)
But I bet you wear them it'll get their dna all over you. Then you'll get arrested for crimes. Then you'll be making the prison jeans yourself.

At least all be looking swagged out as they hall me off in the paddy wagon

Rongi Aug 20th, 2011 05:14 PM

*I'll

CHOJIN GIVE ME BACK MY EDIT BUTTON YOU JERK >: >: >: >: >:

Shyandquietguy Aug 20th, 2011 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prison Blue JEans
The cloth is grown & woven here in the USA and then it is cut and assembled by inmates from the Eastern Oregon Correctional Institution.

Well with how much work is out there right now I think I'll go crash into my ex's house. C'yall!

Chojin Aug 20th, 2011 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shrubfest (Post 738864)
I think you'll find that's called 'The penny up the bum game' here in England. :tophat


Otto Aug 20th, 2011 07:09 PM

Ugh, I got stoned and drunk and threw up in my drink and then forgot I threw up in the drink and accidentally drank some. I've become a caricature.

kahljorn Aug 20th, 2011 11:21 PM

oh man your life is almost over :(

Grislygus Aug 20th, 2011 11:26 PM

KHALJORN YOUR ABSENCE HAS MADE ME WANT TO GIVE YOU A BIG GAY INTERNET HUG






HERE'S YOUR BIG GAY INTERNET HUG

Kitsa Aug 21st, 2011 12:18 AM

wow, you'd be amazed at what pops up when you google image search "big gay internet hug"

Colonel Flagg Aug 21st, 2011 12:41 AM

OK I'll bite.

[...]

Well, that was weird. :\

kahljorn Aug 21st, 2011 02:25 AM

NOW I HAVE GRISLYGUS COOTIES AND IM NOT SHARING THEM

GRISLEBEES YOU"RE THE ONLY REASON I STOPPED MAKING FATCHOJIN ACCOUNTS

Grislygus Aug 21st, 2011 02:29 AM

OH MAN PUB'S GONNA BE SO JEALOUS HE MISSED THIS SUPER SWEET MAN HUG

Sam Aug 21st, 2011 02:40 AM

I WANNA GET IN ON THIS.

Grislygus Aug 21st, 2011 02:50 AM

SUPERGAY GROUP HUG GO


WE'RE LIKE THE FUCKING POWER RANGERS ALL MEGAZORD AN SHIT

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 02:55 AM

No you aren't.

Grislygus Aug 21st, 2011 03:01 AM

OH SHIT IT'S THE PUTTY PATROL

Sam Aug 21st, 2011 03:07 AM

OH SHIT IT'S SOMEONE WHO IS HELLA JELLY BECAUSE THEY AIN'T GO GO POWER RANGERS

Grislygus Aug 21st, 2011 03:08 AM

IT'S GONNA TURN INTO A MUTANT RANGER

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 03:08 AM

power faggots

Grislygus Aug 21st, 2011 03:09 AM

THERE IT GOES

k0k0 Aug 21st, 2011 03:19 AM

Fuck power rangers, I only ever go voltron.

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 04:00 AM

koko is a sloppy party bottom and takes the silly to the bank

Esuohlim Aug 21st, 2011 05:08 AM

The great thing about newer bands is that they all have wacky names!

Andrew Jackson Jihad!

LOL!

Esuohlim Aug 21st, 2011 05:09 AM

"Andrew Jackson Jihad has obtained much coverage for their songs about serial killers, cigarettes, child abuse, and a vengeful Jesus"

Nevermind, this band sounds sweet

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 05:14 AM

I'm partial to DJ Edgar Hoover and his Ed "Duffle Bag Boy" Begley Jr. Mixtape.

Esuohlim Aug 21st, 2011 05:15 AM

Hella lol @ "Ass n' Twin Peaks"

And that album cover

holy shit

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 05:22 AM

I appreciate silliness in my music.

Shyandquietguy Aug 21st, 2011 09:05 AM

I've almost downed a 100 mL of 80 proof whiskey and still standing.

How's that for a first try?

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 09:06 AM

Eh. :\

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 09:07 AM

I mean that's fine if you're a baby man and all.

Shyandquietguy Aug 21st, 2011 09:19 AM

Fuck you.

Have you no heart for the alcohol abstinent beer tasters?

Fuck you to hell.

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 09:28 AM

okay baby man.

k0k0 Aug 21st, 2011 09:29 AM

Is there a baby man drinking his bottle in this thread? I heard some crying.

Shyandquietguy Aug 21st, 2011 09:35 AM

I'm drunk bitches!

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 09:44 AM

silly silly boy

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 09:52 AM

mike doughty tumbls: http://mkdo.co/

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 10:46 AM


Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 11:19 AM

BILBO BAGGINS THAT SWORD COULDN'T CUT SHIT AND YOU KNOW IT

Rongi Aug 21st, 2011 02:42 PM


10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 21st, 2011 02:55 PM

HERE I COME

Rongi Aug 21st, 2011 03:12 PM

I like how he ends his post with "before I waste my time."

"Don't bring your bad vibes over here, bro. My crystal picks up on that and it starts to look all murky."

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 21st, 2011 03:29 PM

Is that a barbed wire tattoo or a jesus fish tatto made to look like barbed wire.

Rongi Aug 21st, 2011 03:39 PM

At first glance I just thought it was some generic "tribal" tat of some sort, but yeah I think it is barbed wire

Rongi Aug 21st, 2011 04:17 PM

I dated this girl who was into energy crystals and other nonsense. One time she refused to swallow my semen because she claimed "there are enzymes in sperm that can be used for mind control."

Sam Aug 21st, 2011 04:20 PM

I mind controlled her into thinking that. ;)

HickMan Aug 21st, 2011 06:36 PM

There's this guy I'm deployed with that gained about six pounds of muscle and lost about half of his brain. I convinced him to get Christmas lights tattooed around his arm stating that "nobody else has that".

Don't you internet faggots go and google search 'christmas light arm tattoo' either and ruin my good time.

Rongi Aug 21st, 2011 06:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam (Post 739052)
I mind controlled her into thinking that. ;)

Thanks man, I ruined a few perfectly good pairs of boxers because of you >:

Fathom Zero Aug 21st, 2011 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HickMan (Post 739054)
I convinced him to get Christmas lights tattooed around his arm stating that "nobody else has that".

That's the best idea anyone has ever had.

Kitsa Aug 21st, 2011 08:14 PM

I saw this leathery woman with a tattoo at the fair today and it looked awful. It reminded me of when they find mummified people and they have tribal markings on them that you can't quite make out.

She looked like beef jerky :(

Sam Aug 21st, 2011 09:24 PM

Did she try to molest your child?

Kitsa Aug 21st, 2011 10:17 PM

nope.

k0k0 Aug 21st, 2011 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rongi (Post 739036)

My question is, if you can do it with a woman. I mean, wouldn't it be less gay to jerk it with a woman who also has a crystal? Or is that against the point?

Sam Aug 21st, 2011 10:20 PM

Man, womans ain't bros, the crystal won't work without that bro-magic.

k0k0 Aug 21st, 2011 10:20 PM

What if it's a bearded woman?

Colonel Flagg Aug 21st, 2011 10:32 PM

Hirsutism doesn't count. There must be dong for the magic to happen.

Not that I know about this or anything ....

Kitsa Aug 21st, 2011 10:34 PM

I have seen so many "I want to JO with bros" listings on craigslist it's a little frightening.

Grislygus Aug 21st, 2011 10:45 PM

But enough about that. When's your work's tv appearance on British tv supposed to happen, Kit?

Kitsa Aug 22nd, 2011 12:44 AM

september or something?

I don't know. The show told me they wanted newer photos, and that was a problem because the originals were taken when my dog was a puppy and that prop was long gone. So we had to make a new prop, then wrestle a flighty 75 lb dog in 90 degree temps to get the pose they wanted. I had family helping me and we'd get the dog in the pose, then step away and the dog would jump down just before I snapped the picture. It got frustrating as hell.

I sent the pics and am waiting to hear if they're ok or if I need to send more.

kahljorn Aug 22nd, 2011 04:44 AM

i like to sew with bros

kahljorn Aug 22nd, 2011 04:58 AM

shrubfest if you were a man i would hella sew with you

Shrubfest Aug 22nd, 2011 07:31 AM

Kahl, we could have a mockery sewing circle. We'd embroider witticisms and cutting barbs onto cutesy items to upset children and parents, and drink Irish coffee without the coffee.

If I had a cock, though.

Fathom Zero Aug 22nd, 2011 07:32 AM

I've been misled.

Colonel Flagg Aug 22nd, 2011 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shrubfest (Post 739129)
[...] drink Irish coffee without the coffee.

Shrub, for this you can be an honorary bro. ;)

Fathom Zero Aug 22nd, 2011 11:22 AM

I wish I could drink right now.

But I already want to kill myself.

Tadao Aug 22nd, 2011 12:53 PM

Bleach will solve both problems!

Fathom Zero Aug 22nd, 2011 06:05 PM

yo rongi

what up, Bird?

kahljorn Aug 22nd, 2011 06:21 PM

shrubfest you should sew yourself a cock


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