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-   -   Ask Willie (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69699193)

executioneer Dec 27th, 2008 05:11 PM

oh buggery :( buy some bottles and have the guys over, so everyone can get roaring drunk there?

glowbelly Dec 27th, 2008 05:58 PM

willie,
i found a letter to my ex husband from his ex girlfriend dated from when we were married. should i burn it in effigy? if i do, should i write down the return address and give that to my ex husband first? i thought that would be nice. how about you?
thanks,
kare

executioneer Dec 28th, 2008 04:58 AM

i agree, but only if you're sure you wanna be nice ;( if you think it's likely she's still got that address you could try signing her up for a bunch of prison penpal programs or something maybe :x

MetalMilitia Dec 29th, 2008 10:45 AM

Dear Willie,

Who will be your first banning now that you're a moderator?

Thanks,

Stefan

bigtimecow Dec 29th, 2008 10:38 PM

HOLY SH*T WILLIE DID YOU KNOW MM'S NAME WAS STEFAN?


what a fag :lol

executioneer Dec 30th, 2008 03:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MetalMilitia (Post 604731)
Dear Willie,

Who will be your first banning now that you're a moderator?

Thanks,

Stefan

i banned a spambot :x does that count

Quote:

Originally Posted by bigtimecow (Post 604892)
HOLY SH*T WILLIE DID YOU KNOW MM'S NAME WAS STEFAN?


what a fag :lol

i think i knew that already but i dont remember

Big McLargehuge Jan 14th, 2009 09:48 PM

Willie, i am trying to remember a game (i know there is a thread for this but you would probably be the one to know anyway). it is probably 10-15 years old it takes place in the future and is about time travel. all i remember is that you wake up in your room in the game and the earth is about to get visited by aliens and you have to go back in time for some reason. and there is a part where you get in a time machine and a fly appears and a voice says something like "foreign life form detected" and lasers kill it.

THANKS IN ADVANCE

executioneer Jan 14th, 2009 10:25 PM

journeyman project 2? HOLD ON LEMME CHECK GOOGLE

also what sort of gameplay did it have and was it a pc game or ???

Big McLargehuge Jan 14th, 2009 10:33 PM

THATS IT, you sir are a godsend.

executioneer Jan 14th, 2009 10:42 PM

haha i THOUGHT that was what it was :( i haven't played that in forever

executioneer Jan 14th, 2009 10:48 PM

actaully it's probably journeyman project 1 :x

Big McLargehuge Jan 14th, 2009 10:53 PM

yeah it is, but you pointed me in the right direction. i remember playing it and there is a part where you have to put in a code from the box to open a door and i didn't have the the box and it took me an hour to run through every possible code before i got it.

Sam Jan 15th, 2009 01:59 AM

I told you Willie would know what it was! :lol

glowbelly Jan 16th, 2009 01:26 PM

dear willie,
what is my ideal weight?
thanks,
glow
ps: i am 5'4".

executioneer Jan 16th, 2009 06:41 PM

i don't really believe in that stuff but some jerk website says 110-145 :( i say it's whatever you're comfortable with that lets you do whatever you wanna do, which for myself is probably between 200 and 250 :( (jerk website says i should be between 140 and 175, NUTS TO THAT)

LordSappington Jan 17th, 2009 10:28 PM

Dear Willie,
How much would it cost to make a small Tesla coil, excluding the electric bill?
Thanks,
Will

executioneer Jan 18th, 2009 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by teslamap.com's FAQ
How much does it cost to build a Tesla coil?

Cost will depend on many factors, mostly how much you can salvage. Used NSTs are
often much cheaper, sometimes even free. MMC caps, magnet wire, good PVC and dryer
duct are all difficult to salvage and will probably have to be bought new. A small coil can
be built for under $100. A large Tesla coil with "nice" parts can cost several hundred
dollars.

googled

DevilWearsPrada Jan 18th, 2009 11:44 PM

Dear Willie,
How much would it cost to make Tesla gauntlets?

Sacks Jan 19th, 2009 07:31 AM

Dear Willie,

How tall are you?

executioneer Jan 19th, 2009 10:25 AM

Quote:

Dear Willie, How much would it cost to make Tesla gauntlets?
1 million bucks idk why don't you ask shocker or whoever

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sacks (Post 608606)
Dear Willie,

How tall are you?

six foot nothin'

glowbelly Jan 19th, 2009 12:51 PM

WILLIE,
SHOULD I GET A WII FIT?
THANK YOU FOR YOUR KIND RESPONSES,
KAREN

Sam Jan 19th, 2009 09:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 608615)
1 million bucks idk why don't you ask shocker or whoever

He'd have to ask Electro, as Shocker fires vibrating air. :(

executioneer Jan 19th, 2009 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glowbelly (Post 608631)
WILLIE,
SHOULD I GET A WII FIT?
THANK YOU FOR YOUR KIND RESPONSES,
KAREN

if you got a wii already, maybe! i haven't tried one so i'd see if you can try it out before you buy it out! i wouldn't get a wii just for that though

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam (Post 608681)
He'd have to ask Electro, as Shocker fires vibrating air. :(

i thought electro had electric powers cause of mutations :( maybe he should ask doc ock he's a smart guy

Sam Jan 19th, 2009 10:34 PM

Forge could make it. :(

executioneer Jan 20th, 2009 12:09 AM

so could mr. fantastic probably, the lousy knowitall

Shrubfest Jan 20th, 2009 04:44 AM

Dear Willie,
What can I do to make myself get up earlier in the morning, without having to take more chemicals than I already do?

Big McLargehuge Jan 20th, 2009 05:02 AM

sam told me to tell you that he could wake you up early in the morning ;(

Shrubfest Jan 20th, 2009 05:27 AM

I've had more than Sam tell me that.

If I'm alone in a morning....

executioneer Jan 20th, 2009 09:09 AM

drink a glass of water (or two or three) before you go to bed!

executioneer Jan 20th, 2009 09:11 AM

(not recommended for bladder problems)

Big McLargehuge Jan 20th, 2009 11:53 AM

Rockin' avatar :0

executioneer Mar 14th, 2009 12:17 AM

THANK YOU BUT THAT ISNT A QUESTION

Tadao Mar 14th, 2009 12:28 AM

William,

If ZQ takes a jab at me for no reason, does that mean she like likes me?

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 14th, 2009 03:37 AM

Go to hell. I called drunk Dibs on ZQ.

As my name is William I feel qualified to answer that.

executioneer Mar 14th, 2009 06:48 PM

i guess it depends on if it was a friendly jab or not!

Evil Robot Mar 15th, 2009 12:29 AM

dOES MY KNEE HURT?

executioneer Mar 15th, 2009 03:00 AM

um if you can't tell if your knee hurts or not i think you got bigger problems than your knee hurting :(

Dixie Mar 15th, 2009 06:54 AM

Lord Wille,
I beseech you!
Where did I put my wallet?

executioneer Mar 15th, 2009 09:02 PM

under the bed?

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 15th, 2009 11:35 PM

Willie,

Why are I not intoxicated beyond belief after returning home from the parade?

executioneer Mar 16th, 2009 12:16 AM

because jonathan frakes wasn't there

Dixie Mar 16th, 2009 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 619509)
under the bed?

It wasn't there.
:(

Kitsa Mar 16th, 2009 02:13 PM

Willie,

Our neighbors are constantly tossing their cigarette butts over into our driveway, where they roll and accumulate in drifts against the grass. I'm tired of going out and picking up their nasty-ass cigarette butts when there will always be more the next day. What should I do about this?

kahljorn Mar 16th, 2009 03:04 PM

report them for littering it'd be hilarious :(

go tell them to stop :(

executioneer Mar 16th, 2009 07:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 619604)
Willie,

Our neighbors are constantly tossing their cigarette butts over into our driveway, where they roll and accumulate in drifts against the grass. I'm tired of going out and picking up their nasty-ass cigarette butts when there will always be more the next day. What should I do about this?

burn their house down while they're asleep it'll look like they were smoking in bed

Kitsa Mar 16th, 2009 07:10 PM

it's a duplex :(

executioneer Mar 16th, 2009 07:16 PM

get a leaf blower and leafblow them back onto their side

Evil Robot Mar 17th, 2009 01:41 AM

What is the minimum clearence for bridges along the Erie canal?

executioneer Mar 17th, 2009 04:15 AM

50% off

Dimnos Mar 17th, 2009 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 619604)
Willie,

Our neighbors are constantly tossing their cigarette butts over into our driveway, where they roll and accumulate in drifts against the grass. I'm tired of going out and picking up their nasty-ass cigarette butts when there will always be more the next day. What should I do about this?

I would sweep them up into a dust pan then dump them in their mailbox, open car window, open house window or maybe just on their front porch.

Grislygus Mar 18th, 2009 01:26 PM

Willie, since when is this ask Dimnos?

executioneer Mar 18th, 2009 07:49 PM

since fuckin' never ago >:

Kitsa Mar 18th, 2009 08:53 PM

They were out burning yard waste in a big bonfire today and for a while I thought it'd catch the house on fire, but no such luck.

Colonel Flagg Mar 18th, 2009 09:21 PM

Willie, in your (obviously correct) opinion, what is the best Whiskey (or Whisky)?

Big McLargehuge Mar 25th, 2009 04:30 PM

Willie,
Do I drink Ketel One just because Ray does? I always tell people it is better than Grey Goose. Is this true?

executioneer Mar 25th, 2009 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 619924)
Willie, in your (obviously correct) opinion, what is the best Whiskey (or Whisky)?

bushmills black is my favourite :(
Quote:

Originally Posted by Big McLargehuge (Post 621385)
Willie,
Do I drink Ketel One just because Ray does? I always tell people it is better than Grey Goose. Is this true?

i don't know for sure if it's better than grey goose but it is damn tasty :( i should really try some grey goose one of these days to be sure

Kitsa Mar 25th, 2009 06:56 PM

in my completely-unsolicited opinion, there's nothing special about Grey Goose. It's moderately smooth, but so is anything that's not knockoff swill.

Willie,

My cat has recently developed a fetish for plastic grocery bags. He licks and humps them. What do you think is behind this, and what should I do about it?

executioneer Mar 25th, 2009 08:09 PM

as for what's behind it, who the hell knows cats are a mystery maybe he's got cat aspergers or something, but what you should do about it is videotape it and put it on youtube

Evil Robot Apr 3rd, 2009 02:36 AM

we need more lemon pledge

executioneer Apr 3rd, 2009 04:52 AM

ill get some at the store just remember to use it in a well-ventilated space or you'll get all lemony

Colonel Flagg Apr 8th, 2009 05:26 AM

Willie why do I always wait so fucking long to do my taxes? >:

Tadao Apr 12th, 2009 05:27 PM

Willie,

Are you ok?

executioneer Apr 13th, 2009 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 623739)
Willie why do I always wait so fucking long to do my taxes? >:

idk i always wait a long time cause i messed up my w4 and have to pay every year >:

executioneer Apr 13th, 2009 10:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 624229)
Willie,

Are you ok?

im fine i'm just trying out a sort of half-quitting the internet thing

Evil Robot Apr 14th, 2009 05:36 PM

Should I be more concearned about my cats urinary tract health?

executioneer Apr 14th, 2009 07:30 PM

maybe about 20% more concerned i guess? don't go nutso over it though

Sam Apr 14th, 2009 08:18 PM

DEAR WILLIE, DID I ASK YOU A QUESTION EARLIER AND FORGET TO POST IT? :(

executioneer Apr 14th, 2009 08:24 PM

probably! do you still remember what the q. was :-[

Sam Apr 14th, 2009 08:25 PM

No but I swear to dogg I typed something in here and posted it. :tear

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 15th, 2009 04:13 AM

Dear Willie,

Two other people at my work have my First and Last lame, and you have my first name.
Does anyone else have your name and does it upset you sometimes?

Thanks,

Ghost

Evil Robot Apr 17th, 2009 02:12 AM

Can I just text my questions to 542542?

Misdemonar Apr 19th, 2009 11:50 PM

AM I COOL YET?

Tadao Apr 20th, 2009 03:56 PM

Can you knight me?

Evil Robot Apr 20th, 2009 07:02 PM

My credit score is 686 with Equifax. If I call in bomb threats to previous lenders would this raise my score?

executioneer Apr 20th, 2009 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 624623)
Dear Willie,

Two other people at my work have my First and Last lame, and you have my first name.
Does anyone else have your name and does it upset you sometimes?

Thanks,

Ghost

yeah theres a william mobbs who owns a big medical supply company in australian and i want there to be an error where all his money goes into my bank account somehow >:

executioneer Apr 20th, 2009 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evil Robot (Post 625008)
Can I just text my questions to 542542?

you can but idk if you'll get a awnser :( you could try texting them to 40404 if you've got twitter maybe

executioneer Apr 20th, 2009 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Misdemonar (Post 625368)
AM I COOL YET?

yeah!

executioneer Apr 20th, 2009 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 625413)
Can you knight me?

no but i can king you if we're playing checkers :(

executioneer Apr 20th, 2009 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evil Robot (Post 625429)
My credit score is 686 with Equifax. If I call in bomb threats to previous lenders would this raise my score?

man maybe they'll lower it 20 points and you can get loans from the DEVIL :eek

Lenor Apr 21st, 2009 04:50 PM

Dear willie,
Am I still one of your most favorite people?

p,s, WHERE ARE MY FUCKING COOKIES??

Misdemonar Apr 22nd, 2009 06:16 PM

HEY GUYS WILLIE SAID I WAS COOL NOW I CAN GO DIE A HAPPY MAN

Evil Robot Apr 22nd, 2009 06:36 PM

What ever happened to doctor bactine?

DevilWearsPrada Apr 22nd, 2009 09:45 PM

What ever happened to captain novolin?

Misdemonar Apr 22nd, 2009 11:24 PM

what ever happened to carmen sandiago?

Sam Apr 22nd, 2009 11:43 PM

Willie, what is the saddest thing?

Lenor Apr 23rd, 2009 01:39 PM

Willie, why is Sam such a dick?

Kitsa Apr 23rd, 2009 06:20 PM

quiet everyone, you're gonna flood willie :(

kahljorn Apr 24th, 2009 02:33 AM

YEA YUOURE GONNA BREAK HIM BECAUSE WITH HIS COMPUTER-lIKE BRAIN HE CANNOT REFUSE TO PROCESS INFORMATION IN A THREAD AND HIS CIRCUITS ARE GONNA GET OVERLOADED AND FRICASSEED.

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 12:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lenor (Post 625504)
Dear willie,
Am I still one of your most favorite people?

p,s, WHERE ARE MY FUCKING COOKIES??

THEY ARE ON THE COUNTER ON A PLATE COME GET THEM

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 12:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Evil Robot (Post 625624)
What ever happened to doctor bactine?

he got arrested for indecent exposure

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 12:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DevilWearsPrada (Post 625647)
What ever happened to captain novolin?

DIED FROM AIDS

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 12:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Misdemonar (Post 625659)
what ever happened to carmen sandiago?

that guy from spamusement caught her i think

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 12:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam (Post 625662)
Willie, what is the saddest thing?

unmasking the masturbating bear to find the skeleton of the guy who invented the chipmunks inside

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lenor (Post 625698)
Willie, why is Sam such a dick?

becasue sam is the man, or so i'm told

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 12:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 625728)
quiet everyone, you're gonna flood willie :(

REDO FROM START
?

Evil Robot Apr 25th, 2009 01:28 AM

10 print "What ever happened to doctor bactine?"
20 goto 10
30 End

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 01:41 AM

Code:

#include <stdio.h>

int main()
{
 do
 {
  printf ("HE GOT HIGH ON PAINT STRIPPER AND SHOWED HIS WEINER TO A LADY MOTORCYCLE COP");
 }
  while (1=1);
}


10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 25th, 2009 11:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 625974)
unmasking the masturbating bear to find the skeleton of the guy who invented the chipmunks inside


I didn't know the guy who played lex luthor on smallville also invented the chipmunks.

executioneer Apr 25th, 2009 02:25 PM

i don't think he did! i was referencing early conan the comic strip :(

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 25th, 2009 02:38 PM

My bad :(

I'll shut up now.....for a few minutes at least.

Also,

what's the limit on bad puns before a ban?


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