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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Pentegarn Apr 11th, 2011 06:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LordSappington (Post 717239)
I've lately started freaking out and becoming intensely uncomfortable the instant I realize that my hair has grown just past the point that I think I need a haircut. At this point, I'm inconsolable; even my girlfriend's insistence that longer hair looks 'Cuter on you', I almost rabidly insist on getting a haircut.

I feel you. I like to keep my lettuce tight as well, soon as it grows beyond a certain point I get antsy and want it cut right away. Heck my GF even voices pretty much the same longer hair argument as well.

Shrubfest Apr 11th, 2011 06:18 AM

Sounds like the usual fun. I got given the whole Adobe Cs4 pack, and the only thing I've touched is Photoshop.
I don't even know what half of the shit is.

Grislygus Apr 11th, 2011 06:19 AM

All you need to know is that Maya is hellspawn

LordSappington Apr 11th, 2011 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pentegarn (Post 717262)
I feel you. I like to keep my lettuce tight as well, soon as it grows beyond a certain point I get antsy and want it cut right away. Heck my GF even voices pretty much the same longer hair argument as well.

This is also getting worse with having my girlfriend's prom in a few weeks; whenever I get reminded of it, I stare at a mirror and try to think 'Should I trim my hair? I think it needs a trim. And what about the color? I think I need to touch it up. But should I stay with the blue, or go with green?'
I can see why my parents thought I'm gay.

Pub Lover Apr 11th, 2011 12:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 717251)
My edit button's been stolen.

I don't think you fags realize how crippling that is.

You should never have been given it back. >:

Pub Lover Apr 11th, 2011 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LordSappington (Post 717273)
I can see why my parents thought I'm gay.

All the cocksucking was probably it. :eek

LordSappington Apr 11th, 2011 12:20 PM

Figurative or literal? I'm pretty famous for both

Tadao Apr 11th, 2011 12:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 717197)
Seeing as I don't factor in the billboard photo, you'd best change the title from "Ladies of I-Mockery" to "Ladies of I-Mockery I'd Have Relations With".

But you put a restraining order on me. >:

Tadao Apr 11th, 2011 01:02 PM

Also the photomania thing only allowed 3 photos. You think I actually took time out of my busy day to photoshop them in? HAH

Tadao Apr 11th, 2011 01:03 PM

Also getting jealous turns me on. :yum

Esuohlim Apr 11th, 2011 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MLE (Post 717199)
Or "Ladies of I-Mockery That Sound Like They're Single"

Shrub is legally married but no one here is taking that seriously

MLE Apr 11th, 2011 01:19 PM

I'm not single either, but that doesn't stop people from assuming since I'm not with Choj, I must be single.

Esuohlim Apr 11th, 2011 01:21 PM

And Elx is still 14, so the only single and obtainable I-Mock lady is kahljorn :eek

Grislygus Apr 11th, 2011 01:26 PM

Kahljorn IS very confusing in drag

Pub Lover Apr 11th, 2011 01:50 PM

Wait, is it not ok to wank over pictures of married/dating women? :eek

Tadao Apr 11th, 2011 01:55 PM

I always check the single status of the women in the porn that I jerk it to.

Zhukov Apr 11th, 2011 01:57 PM

Nobody is single? Guess I can stop the sucking up then.

Pub Lover Apr 11th, 2011 02:32 PM

What a curious way to masturbate. :eek

elx Apr 11th, 2011 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 717279)
underage


Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 717288)
14

really? twice in one day? I am almost 19 and I took that picture like two months ago :@

edit:
Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 717295)
Nobody is single? Guess I can stop the sucking up then.

Hangie is single :)

elx Apr 11th, 2011 03:12 PM

what was the name of that one film that was really sad with that zombie that sang that song that was like "all byyyyyy mysellllllf"?

Colonel Flagg Apr 11th, 2011 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 717297)
I am almost 19 and I took that picture like two months ago.

DO THE MATH, PEOPLE! >:

Colonel Flagg Apr 11th, 2011 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LordSappington (Post 717273)
I can see why my parents thought I'm gay.

:lol

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 11th, 2011 04:06 PM

Hangie is more of a its complicated status....cuz thats a thing you can pick places now. I'd love to see that on my health and dental information.

Name: Bill
Occupation: Claims
Deductibe: 20%
Marital status: It's complicated

Sam Apr 11th, 2011 04:45 PM

It's complicated between Shrub and me. :(

Shrubfest Apr 11th, 2011 04:47 PM

Husband has decided to read this convo, as it's 'casting aspersions on our marriage' and that 'Tadao is clearly the alpha male here, and Milhouse backwards is the young upstart who needs to be put across my knee. Pricks'

I lol'ed.

Sam Apr 11th, 2011 04:50 PM

Milhouse backwards is always the lucky one.

Fathom Zero Apr 11th, 2011 04:52 PM

ass play rocks

Babs Apr 11th, 2011 04:59 PM

rocks play ass

Pentegarn Apr 11th, 2011 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 717299)
DO THE MATH, PEOPLE! >:


And that wins the award for post of the year intended for an audience of one :lol

Tadao Apr 11th, 2011 11:56 PM

:lol I've never been called an alpha male till now. I don't think he knows what it means.

:(

Kitsa Apr 11th, 2011 11:57 PM

I need to clear things up a bit to say I'm not exactly jealous, more or less chuckling at the thought of not making the "female" list. Whether it was the actual thought or just the argument's-sake thought.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 11th, 2011 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 717137)
Still waiting for those gee dubya tats

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 717139)
Huh
Did I promise tattoos again


Hang on, what was it? I'll be near a scanner on monday

Hahaha, I totally meant G W Tits. instead of Gx2 Tats :(

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 12th, 2011 12:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shrubfest (Post 717307)
Husband has decided to read this convo, as it's 'casting aspersions on our marriage' and that 'Tadao is clearly the alpha male here, and Milhouse backwards is the young upstart who needs to be put across my knee. Pricks'

I lol'ed.


10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 12th, 2011 12:12 AM

Happy Real Birthday Phoenix Gamma.

Chojin Apr 12th, 2011 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shrubfest (Post 717307)
Husband has decided to read this convo, as it's "casting aspersions on our marriage"

does that make you aspies

LordSappington Apr 12th, 2011 12:20 AM

I randomly came down with a fever at work, which sparked a major vertigo attack. I realized something was very wrong when the deli slicer started vibrating in my vision. Now I've been pretty much immobile in my bed. Fun times.

Phoenix Gamma Apr 12th, 2011 03:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 717331)
Happy Real Birthday Phoenix Gamma.

<3

I'm working a morning shift today sadly, but my manager is coming back from vacation, and she bakes for us on a regular basis. I'm hoping she remembers and brings me something special <3

I got into my first argument with a customer yesterday, though. He was some old man who didn't understand what the fuck he wanted ("I want a thing for my blackberry for when I'm in the car. It's a $95 thing you guys just came out with! I read it in Consumer Reports!") I was explaining to him that we only have two options to take calls with a phone (earbuds with a mic or a bluetooth headset) but he was old and cranky and told me I was "a real shitty salesman."

"Actually, sir, I'm a demonstration specialist. And employee of the month".

Fuck old people >:

Pentegarn Apr 12th, 2011 07:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 717328)
I need to clear things up a bit to say I'm not exactly jealous, more or less chuckling at the thought of not making the "female" list. Whether it was the actual thought or just the argument's-sake thought.

You'll always be a human female to me

Zhukov Apr 12th, 2011 09:06 AM

Who do we think would win in a real life fight to become i-mockery alpha male?

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 12th, 2011 09:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix Gamma (Post 717340)
<3

I'm working a morning shift today sadly, but my manager is coming back from vacation, and she bakes for us on a regular basis. I'm hoping she remembers and brings me something special <3

"It's a $95 thing you guys just came out with! I read it in Consumer Reports!")

:lol I used to hate people who came in like that. People who read the farmers almanac were annoying too.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 717349)
Who do we think would win in a real life fight to become i-mockery alpha male?

I went to the gym yesterday so I'm nominating myself dominating everybody else.

Colonel Flagg Apr 12th, 2011 09:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pentegarn (Post 717312)
And that wins the award for post of the year intended for an audience of one :lol

And I'm glad the "one" appreciated it. :rock

Colonel Flagg Apr 12th, 2011 09:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shrubfest (Post 717307)
'Tadao is clearly the alpha male here ...'

I think Pub should have something to say about that. :eek

Colonel Flagg Apr 12th, 2011 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 717328)
I['m] more or less chuckling at the thought of not making the "female" list.

You make my list, for what that's worth.

MarioRPG Apr 12th, 2011 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 717349)
Who do we think would win in a real life fight to become i-mockery alpha male?

Well, considering there's a substantial percentage of basement-dwellers... It'd be a pretty lop sided match.
But we all know the real alpha male
Spoilers!

Grislygus Apr 12th, 2011 12:01 PM

I WOULD be all smug about these IRL alpha male shenanigans if it weren't for the fact that Chojin is well on his way to being @#$!ing ripped like Hugh Jackman

Grislygus Apr 12th, 2011 12:02 PM

I'D BACK WILLIE UP, THOUGH

HIT CHOJIN WITH A 2 x 4 SPLATTERHOUSE STYLE WHEN HE WASN'T LOOKING, SEE IF THAT WORKED

Zhukov Apr 12th, 2011 01:02 PM

I may be wiry but I have a very high pain threshold. I think it would be between Chojin and 10k though.

MLE Apr 12th, 2011 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 717349)
Who do we think would win in a real life fight to become i-mockery alpha male?

helm

Esuohlim Apr 12th, 2011 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 717328)
I need to clear things up a bit to say I'm not exactly jealous, more or less chuckling at the thought of not making the "female" list. Whether it was the actual thought or just the argument's-sake thought.

THIS FORUM DOES NEED MORE FEMALE MIND GAMES

Fathom Zero Apr 12th, 2011 01:32 PM


Tadao Apr 12th, 2011 02:12 PM

Look at you little girls, all gossiping about who is the alpha male. :rolleyes

Fathom Zero Apr 12th, 2011 02:18 PM

I'll throw my hat in the ring, in case you're feeling lonely.

Grislygus Apr 12th, 2011 03:12 PM

WHU-OH, Auntie Tadao has the rolling pin ready

Zhukov Apr 12th, 2011 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MLE (Post 717374)
helm

Oh yeah.

MLE Apr 12th, 2011 03:35 PM

i win

King Hadas Apr 12th, 2011 03:41 PM

Flattery won't get Helm posting here again.

Esuohlim Apr 12th, 2011 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 717382)
Look at you little girls, all gossiping about who is the alpha male. :rolleyes

I AM AT THE VERY LEAST THE LAMBDA MALE

Tadao Apr 12th, 2011 09:55 PM

You are easily more of a man than these Nancy's.

Zhukov Apr 12th, 2011 10:08 PM

Throwing bait so obvious it's got sinkers attached, Tadao clearly out to prove his nonchalant claim to the rank of 'alpha male'.

Tadao Apr 12th, 2011 10:13 PM

Oh yeah, that's what I'm doing. :rolleyes

You little pussies can go back to talking about which man is better than you.

Zhukov Apr 12th, 2011 10:24 PM

It's jokes. You're taking it seriously and getting riled up because you ACTUALLY think you are better than everyone :lol

Grislygus Apr 12th, 2011 10:25 PM

I told you guys to hush, it's Aunt Tadima's time of the month

Tadao Apr 12th, 2011 10:26 PM

Oh god, you're another GW aren't you. You really think I take it seriously? Wow. That's pretty gay. I really don't know how to respond to you now.

Tadao Apr 12th, 2011 10:30 PM

Gus, dude calm down. I was only joking. Don't get all serious on me. :(

Tadao Apr 12th, 2011 10:32 PM

OH OH, I'M DEFLECTING BECAUSE I REALLY CARE WHAT YOU THINK OF ME :(

Grislygus Apr 12th, 2011 11:10 PM

I'm always completely serious about everything and am offended that you would somehow imply that you felt that I wasn't at some point in time DICKBAG

Fathom Zero Apr 12th, 2011 11:41 PM

I made a bratwurst, chicken, and mashed potato sandwich and fuck if that wasn't the greatest sandwich ever.

Esuohlim Apr 12th, 2011 11:54 PM

No way fucker mine is the alpha sandwich

executioneer Apr 13th, 2011 12:03 AM

i cant believe we had a "whose the baddest dude" conversation and j tithonius pednaud didnt get brought up yet

dude looked like a truck with a tophat on

Fathom Zero Apr 13th, 2011 12:03 AM

coz you only eat dick sandwiches

bonnnnnnnnng

Fathom Zero Apr 13th, 2011 12:05 AM

JT Pednaud has the life I want to have and I strive everyday to try and make mine a tenth as interesting as his.

The Retro Kat Apr 13th, 2011 12:43 AM

Mine's gonna be a knuckle sandwich if you knuckleheads don't keep it down!

Esuohlim Apr 13th, 2011 12:57 AM

:eek No fucking way :eek

Fathom Zero Apr 13th, 2011 01:44 AM

I KNOW RITE :O

Esuohlim Apr 13th, 2011 01:50 AM

Hey Retro Kat did you bring Emu and ScruU2wice back with you, you big fairy >:

Esuohlim Apr 13th, 2011 01:52 AM

Emu's last activity: April 12th 2011 :eek

Esuohlim Apr 13th, 2011 01:53 AM

ScruU2wice's last activity: March 24th 2009 :(

Zhukov Apr 13th, 2011 01:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 717450)
i cant believe we had a "whose the baddest dude" conversation and j tithonius pednaud didnt get brought up yet

dude looked like a truck with a tophat on

I keep forgetting the heavyweights. The internet isn't full of pale slivers, as I once thought.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 717433)
Oh god, you're another GW aren't you. You really think I take it seriously? Wow. That's pretty gay. I really don't know how to respond to you now.

I can tell you're throwing jokes, but that doesn't mean the aloofness is real. Are we going to have a 'whose taking it less seriously' argument? At a glance you've got more posts/words/smiley faces, so I'm the more laid back.

Guitar Woman Apr 13th, 2011 02:03 AM

Yeah, Tadao may not be a serious jerk, but he's still a jerk.

executioneer Apr 13th, 2011 02:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 717469)
Hey Retro Kat did you bring Emu and ScruU2wice back with you, you big fairy >:

WHAT ABOUT RONGI AND ARROWX

wait no just rongi lol :mean

Grislygus Apr 13th, 2011 02:09 AM

Didn't Rongi get banned or something

Over spectacularly gay-ass shit

executioneer Apr 13th, 2011 02:10 AM

because he gave arrowx his password :(

Grislygus Apr 13th, 2011 02:12 AM

And as much as I hate to directly say anything on the internet, I really ddoubt Tadao gives a shit about serious business

Man this is like a personal fag day for me or something, making actual contributions to conversations all over the place

Grislygus Apr 13th, 2011 02:13 AM

I thought he was mad about the new forum layout and threw a temper tantrum about Chojin forcibly teabagging him

executioneer Apr 13th, 2011 02:17 AM

and then he gave his pw to arrowx because he felt that was the worst thing he could do, being an mod and all

Zhukov Apr 13th, 2011 02:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 717480)
And as much as I hate to directly say anything on the internet, I really ddoubt Tadao gives a shit about serious business

I doubt he gives as shit about much these days, but trying to get a rise out of people isn't half obvious as proving how tough he is. I don't care that he does it, I like scoffing at everything GW does too, just don't pretend you're not doing it.

On I-MOCKERY.

Throw something better at me than GAY.

Chojin Apr 13th, 2011 03:00 AM

i had demodded rongi for not ever logging in or doing anything, so he gave his password to that fatty in retaliation or tardrage or something, thereby making me ban him.

executioneer Apr 13th, 2011 03:12 AM

oh i didnt know he got demodded whoop[s

Guitar Woman Apr 13th, 2011 05:34 AM

I still hang with ArrowX on some other forum. Bit annoying, not really a bad guy. He's kind of my own little Guitar Woman, biting my ankles and desperately striving for approval.

Also whenever the weeklies get updated you can presumably go and initiate further scoffing at the sexy and exciting realization of my middle-school dream of writing something on I-Mockery, although I wouldn't blame the brass for not posting it. It's horrible, really the worst thing to happen to the written word since My Immortal.

King Hadas Apr 13th, 2011 05:48 AM

Rongi was a mod? I don't remember that. In fact I was under the impression Rongi wasn't well liked around here.

Tadao Apr 13th, 2011 05:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 717487)
I doubt he gives as shit about much these days, but trying to get a rise out of people isn't half obvious as proving how tough he is. I don't care that he does it, I like scoffing at everything GW does too, just don't pretend you're not doing it.

On I-MOCKERY.

Throw something better at me than GAY.

That's the thing. I'm not pretending. I really do think that a bunch of guys talking about who is the alpha male is has to be the gayest thing ever. I will try in the future to not be more of a man than you. I know you like to keep me just so in my pigeon hole and will try harder to be exactly as you percieve me to be. Try to remeber though, when a person is acting like a little homosexual, I will useally call them gay.

Tadao Apr 13th, 2011 05:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 717474)
Yeah, Tadao may not be a serious jerk, but he's still a jerk.

Pure and simple.

Guitar Woman Apr 13th, 2011 06:31 AM

also thanks whoever restored my ability to go back and put a bunch of dick jokes into my posts

Zhukov Apr 13th, 2011 06:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 717505)
That's the thing. I'm not pretending. I really do think that a bunch of guys talking about who is the alpha male is has to be the gayest thing ever. I will try in the future to not be more of a man than you. I know you like to keep me just so in my pigeon hole and will try harder to be exactly as you percieve me to be. Try to remeber though, when a person is acting like a little homosexual, I will useally call them gay.

So you call me out for thinking you were being serious... then you tell me you are being serious... about how much you think other people being serious (whilst really just joking) about something is gay. OH OH, were you just saying that to prove how much of a bitch I am? NICE STYLE.

I think I'll just take it as Tadao trying to push buttons in a rather boring way again; because that's how you are acting.

elx Apr 13th, 2011 07:29 AM

oh man, I hope you guys start updating your respective loveline threads again, that stuff is so funny :(

Esuohlim Apr 13th, 2011 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 717500)
Also whenever the weeklies get updated you can presumably go and initiate further scoffing at the sexy and exciting realization of my middle-school dream of writing something on I-Mockery

I've only written two Weeklies but I like doing them because they only take ten minutes (and it shows), but then there's people like Ex Leper who are "practicing their writing for a few months" before even considering trying to write a Weekly.

Tadao Apr 13th, 2011 11:53 AM

OH NO, I FOUND OUT THAT I CAN'T THINK YOU GUYS ARE ACTING GAY. SO MANY RULES HERE AT I-MOCKERY. GLAD ZMAN IS HERE TO TELL ME HOW I NEED TO FEEL ABOUT THINGS AND STUFF. HE MAKES A GREAT NAZI.

Esuohlim Apr 13th, 2011 12:08 PM

Don't let anyone tell you that you can't ever think I'm acting gay.

I'm about as gay as it gets, man. Fuck.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 13th, 2011 12:09 PM

It takes me forever to write weeklies because anytime I go online at home I get sucked into cam4 too.

10,000 Volt Ghost Apr 13th, 2011 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 717522)
Don't let anyone tell you that you can't ever think I'm acting gay.

I'm about as gay as it gets, man. Fuck.

It gets manfuck all up in here.


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