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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Tadao Mar 19th, 2012 04:46 PM

Fucking hell, do you work for a major chain or a "health food" grocery. I've worked for both and it sounds like you work for either Trader Joe's or Whole Foods. I worked for WinCo (Eureka, Fresno) and New Leaf (Santa Cruz).

You don't have to answer because I WILL FIND YOU, but dude, it sounds like you work for yuppies.

Tadao Mar 19th, 2012 04:47 PM

I almost missed the Brak. :O

Aaarg Mar 19th, 2012 05:29 PM

yuppies? dude, the other produce clerk spits tobacco in the trash can all day and tells me about how much he likes frog gigging.

i work for lowes foods, which has several stores in central north carolina and like... five in southwestern virginia. it's a small shitty chain that charges way too much and - like all north carolina businesses - is strongly anti-union.

previously i worked for food lion/delhaize and safeway.

this is where i live:
http://www.wxii12.com/video/30200508/detail.html

Aaarg Mar 19th, 2012 05:34 PM

also my store is just outside of a small town that is dry... which is fucking weird.

Tadao Mar 20th, 2012 12:47 AM

Oh man, I remember when food lion got busted for remarking expired foster farm chicken as fresh food lion brand. :lol

Pub Lover Mar 20th, 2012 12:54 AM

Happy Birthday, Kitsa. :)

Kitsa Mar 20th, 2012 07:25 AM

Thanks :D

Aaarg Mar 20th, 2012 08:19 AM

birthdays? happy birthday!


tadao i remember when i was at food lion and the meat manager stole beer and drank on the job and also re-ground old beef with new beef yay food lion

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 20th, 2012 09:14 AM

Happy Birthday Kitsa!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 756369)
Thanks :D

You're welcome :wink

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aaarg (Post 756370)
birthdays? happy birthday!


tadao i remember when i was at food lion and the meat manager stole beer and drank on the job and also re-ground old beef with new beef yay food lion

Sounds like the Butcher from Diablo I.

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 20th, 2012 09:30 AM

Fathom ~ I saw you on two and a half men last night.

Kitsa Mar 20th, 2012 10:59 AM

Thank you. It was awesome. I went on a great trip and should probably post about some of the crap I saw but I lack energy atm.

Colonel Flagg Mar 20th, 2012 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 756359)
I almost missed the Brak. :O

Thank goodness for the pubmeister. :p

HBDK! :party

ThrashO Mar 20th, 2012 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aaarg (Post 756361)
i work for lowes foods, which has several stores in central north carolina and like...

one is across the street from me and I steal from there almost daily :)

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 21st, 2012 12:27 AM

^I forgot to tell you. I was looking up the video for hardcore pawn with the shark suit and it came up with a guy wearing a shark suit stagediving at a municipal waste concert that made me crack up.

Aaarg Mar 21st, 2012 10:01 AM

i steal a lot too but it's mostly fruit with bad spots or sugar snap peas and my stealing only goes as far as my belly

Kitsa Mar 21st, 2012 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 756377)
Thank goodness for the pubmeister. :p

HBDK! :party

tycf

Kitsa Mar 21st, 2012 08:47 PM

My neighbor is receiving sloppy drunk oral in his van with the doors wide open in his driveway. I know this because when the guy's dogs went after me as I passed, the woman raised herself from the bent-over position enough to shout at me that they ain't her dogs.

ThrashO Mar 22nd, 2012 05:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 756386)
^I forgot to tell you. I was looking up the video for hardcore pawn with the shark suit and it came up with a guy wearing a shark suit stagediving at a municipal waste concert that made me crack up.

thats the terror shark :rock

kahljorn Mar 22nd, 2012 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 756413)
My neighbor is receiving sloppy drunk oral in his van with the doors wide open in his driveway. I know this because when the guy's dogs went after me as I passed, the woman raised herself from the bent-over position enough to shout at me that they ain't her dogs.

:lol

Zhukov Mar 22nd, 2012 11:42 PM

Sometimes I wish that Kitsa's life was a film.

Aaarg Mar 23rd, 2012 12:46 PM

i'm sure if you search for "sloppy blowjob video" you can see this @@

Fathom Zero Mar 23rd, 2012 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 756373)
Fathom ~ I saw you on two and a half men last night.

WHA HAPPENED?

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 23rd, 2012 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 756495)
There are 10,000 reasons to listen to Bill. And one of them involves an airhorn.

I totally got airhorned myself last week.

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 23rd, 2012 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 756493)
WHA HAPPENED?

You sat on the coach playing videogames with the son.



This guy.

Fathom Zero Mar 23rd, 2012 05:06 PM

NOT EVEN

Otto Mar 24th, 2012 11:31 AM

This Friday I'm getting a tattoo of my dog as the Kaiser, it's the beginning of a World War 1 themed chest piece.

BIRTHDAY TATTOO

Big McLargehuge Mar 24th, 2012 01:00 PM

more like IRONIC HIPSTER TATTOO.

Otto Mar 24th, 2012 01:28 PM

more like climb dick mountain and drown in a cumpool

Fathom Zero Mar 24th, 2012 04:20 PM

That is a good tattoo, Otto. I want a Kaiser dog.

Zomboid Mar 24th, 2012 05:03 PM

My dog's name is Kaiser Wilhelm. He's A-OK.

Otto Mar 24th, 2012 07:57 PM

The final piece will have my dead dog, Pook/Cyclops, on the other side of my chest as a British Tommy, with No Man's Land in the middle (complete with a downed biplane).

Esuohlim Mar 25th, 2012 04:18 AM

March 25th is Melt Emoticon Appreciation Day

:melt

We can also talk about all the other gay emoticons no one has used since 2003

Fathom Zero Mar 25th, 2012 05:36 AM

:gigh

OR THE BEST EMOTICOBS EVER

Colonel Flagg Mar 25th, 2012 08:03 AM

:boot

Babs Mar 25th, 2012 03:07 PM

:bacos

Pub Lover Mar 25th, 2012 06:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 756517)
Catholic wackiness differs greatly from Protestant wackiness.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 756518)
darkvare do you even learn evolution in schools

its because in america we have all this stuff called knowledge and technology and science and religious people realize this and it makes them feel stupid so they try to justify themselves
of course you're not going to have that in a place thats very religious/mexico

:melt

Esuohlim Mar 25th, 2012 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LordSappington (Post 756485)
I'm not going to get into all my bleeding heart bullshit, but sleeping around isn't my style. I'm pretty sure it's been mentioned

:melt

ThrashO Mar 26th, 2012 01:09 AM

:melt I <3 M.E.A.D. :melt

Kitsa Mar 26th, 2012 08:55 AM

I had one everloving fuck of a bad weekend and a pounding headache now. To hell with this weekend and fuck the Excedrin recall :(

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 26th, 2012 09:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 756587)
the Excedrin recall

:melt

Aaarg Mar 26th, 2012 10:59 AM

excedrin recall? uh oh i should look into th :melt

Kitsa Mar 26th, 2012 11:06 AM

I heard from somebody that there might not be real excedrin on shelves for another YEAR. :( :( :(

Tadao Mar 26th, 2012 12:06 PM

That's why I take vicodin. :melt :melt :melt

Fathom Zero Mar 26th, 2012 01:31 PM

Or you could just take Advil and have a Coke.

ThrashO Mar 26th, 2012 01:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 756597)
Or you could just take Coke.

:melt :bacos :melt

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 26th, 2012 02:24 PM

:wank :melt

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 26th, 2012 02:25 PM

:wank :posh

Esuohlim Mar 26th, 2012 03:50 PM

Why is womti posting snuff anime now? Why can't he just die in real life and leave us alone.

Womti Mar 26th, 2012 04:13 PM

the one getting snuffed is catherine; a loli from vampirefreaks ;<
also guys I have a room and cable TV now anyone wanna come over and make out :o

Aaarg Mar 26th, 2012 08:06 PM

i added facebook to my hosts file so now on websites with facebook elements in sidebars or facebook comments i get "THIS PAGE CANNOT BE DISPLAYED" and it's making the internet a good deal better.

though the facebook frame on the front page of i-mockery still appears and i don't know why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!FUC K U ROg

Pub Lover Mar 26th, 2012 10:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 756073)
Faceswap photoshop. Faceshop photoswap


Pub Lover Mar 26th, 2012 11:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 737055)
womti how are you still this bad at the internet after being on it for so many years

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 737323)
I WISH ELX'S TITTIES HAD THE SAME BIRTHDAY AS ME.

It is entirely possible that they do. :eek :dannytatom
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 756630)
Are we going to have another Synchtube session?

Do it. :melt

Pub Lover Mar 26th, 2012 11:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Womti (Post 756616)
I FUCKED 2 YOUNG GIRLS BUT NOT AT THE SAME TIME/DATE :)
ARE YOU PROUD OF ME?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 756618)
I'll be proud of you when you can produce comedy without relying upon shout outs and cliches.

Tadao is the Fagin of the board? All training up the homeless to be worthless bags of shit?

Babs Mar 26th, 2012 11:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Womti (Post 756609)
oh and btw I'm not homeless anymore :)

CORRECTION, train the homeless to use library computers :melt

Pub Lover Mar 27th, 2012 12:20 AM

I am much more annoyed by a homeless person knockin up 'young girls' than having to suffer them posting shit online about it. :angrymelt

Fartin had his email hacked and is spamming up my inbox. I imagine I am the only one here with this trouble. :eek

Tadao Mar 27th, 2012 12:26 AM

Who is Fagin?

Pub Lover Mar 27th, 2012 01:00 AM

A dude that likes to take in homeless young boys and teach them... a craft.

Like how to stick their hands in without it being felt. :x

ThrashO Mar 27th, 2012 01:54 AM

woah cool

Esuohlim Mar 27th, 2012 02:51 AM


Colonel Flagg Mar 27th, 2012 03:03 AM

womti
:boot

Esuohlim Mar 27th, 2012 03:25 AM

Womti would be banned but he has over a million infraction points, so I don't think adding anymore registers correctly. Why he's able to post in the first place is completely beyond me :(

Kitsa Mar 27th, 2012 07:29 AM

I got the Fagin reference :(

Pub Lover Mar 27th, 2012 07:48 AM

I didn't think Dickens was an obscure thing to reference. :sadmelt

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 27th, 2012 10:15 AM

Carl Fagin.

Colonel Flagg Mar 27th, 2012 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 756653)
I didn't think Dickens was an obscure thing to reference. :sadmelt

Depends on where you live.

Tadao Mar 27th, 2012 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 756643)
A dude that likes to take in homeless young boys and teach them... a craft.

Like how to stick their hands in without it being felt. :x

Oh, I almost thought you were doggin on me by mistyping Fartin. :eek

Esuohlim Mar 27th, 2012 03:26 PM



:dickens

Pub Lover Mar 27th, 2012 05:34 PM

My humour chip isn't firing right yet today but everyone knows that Womti was in a House of Corrections, right?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Colonel Flagg (Post 756662)
Depends on where you live.

That link doesn't even resolve from my location. :(

Doubly denied knowing your reference. :melt

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 27th, 2012 06:03 PM

HOUSE OF CANDLES HOUSE OF WAX

Tadao Mar 27th, 2012 06:43 PM

HEY GUYS! DID YOU hear1 ALI SABBATH RETURNED! OMG WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Pub Lover Mar 27th, 2012 06:53 PM

I am very glad Ali Sabbath has returned. He has long been my favourite poster on these forums. Many of his posts have left me with lasting memories. Let me repost them here.

Esuohlim Mar 27th, 2012 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlliSabbah (Post 512736)
Now that sounds promising.


Pub Lover Mar 27th, 2012 08:45 PM

A classic.
Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 756691)
NVM I figured it out. The hax0rz put the wrong track on the movie.

What are you watching it in? From the link it says it has multiple audio streams. Some video players don't make switching streams obvious or easy.

Colonel Flagg Mar 27th, 2012 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 756689)
I am very glad Ali Sabbath has returned. He has long been my favourite poster on these forums. Many of his posts have left me with lasting memories. Let me repost them here.

<like>

Pub Lover Mar 27th, 2012 10:14 PM

:pagebrak

elx Mar 28th, 2012 04:23 AM

a couple of years ago I posted a baby photo with cake, did any of you guys save that one like you saved the rest of them? it was ruined IRL and I no longer have any copy :(

Pub Lover Mar 28th, 2012 06:36 AM

Sorry. Saddened to hear you lost the picture. :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 633928)
no problem, i just happen to like jews

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 633929)
So do I! :eek

I really hope I can catch one, so he can give me his pot of gold.


10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 28th, 2012 10:43 AM

Its prob still saved in your photobucket

Pub Lover Mar 28th, 2012 10:55 AM

From what I could tell she'd deleted her account there. :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 638035)





Was the post that had it originally.

10,000 Volt Ghost Mar 28th, 2012 11:18 AM

:(

Tadao might have it.....or liquidtatom

Colonel Flagg Mar 28th, 2012 11:25 AM

Danny would have kept only a suitably photoshopped version, I'm sure.

Pub Lover Mar 28th, 2012 11:32 AM

Maybe T.

Danny breaks/wipes his hard drive too often for him to have anything saved.

Tadao Mar 28th, 2012 12:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 756694)

What are you watching it in? From the link it says it has multiple audio streams. Some video players don't make switching streams obvious or easy.

I'm watching it in WMP and it plays all the audio streams at once, which it should. I have an MKV editor that can remove tracks, I'll probably add the Plinken one to it later and remove the MST one. Too much work for a stupid movie with stupid people being stupid.

Quote:

Originally Posted by elx (Post 756712)
a couple of years ago I posted a baby photo with cake, did any of you guys save that one like you saved the rest of them? it was ruined IRL and I no longer have any copy :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 756718)
:(

Tadao might have it.....or liquidtatom

I don't jerk off to babies with cake, I jerk off to babies while eating cake. DON'T MAKE THAT MISTAKE AGAIN!

Tadao Mar 28th, 2012 12:45 PM

Also, incase you didn't know. WMP Classic can switch between audio streams. I just looked and it would appear that the file I downloaded only has 1 audio stream :/ AND TO TOP IT OFF the Plinkett file I downloaded is some guy who rearranged Plinketts review to fit the movie, not the actual Plinkett comentary. I don't want to pay 2 dollars for it and we all know streaming sucks balls.


:angrypiratebabyface

Tadao Mar 28th, 2012 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pub Lover (Post 756727)

:2Xeek

kahljorn Mar 28th, 2012 04:06 PM

i dunno what kind of file you got but you might want to get that community codec thing for Windows media player classic.
Sometimes: you cant switch between audiostreams, they all play at once or it looks like you only have one if you don't have the right codecs. especially if its mkv
but you said you have an editor so i dunno

Pub Lover Mar 28th, 2012 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 756739)
i thought all our suggestions were correct, and that's why we were posting them

Mister KayJay always wins the Participation Ribbon.

He is a winner in his own way.

Three silent cheers for him.

Tadao Mar 28th, 2012 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 756738)
i dunno what kind of file you got but you might want to get that community codec thing for Windows media player classic.
Sometimes: you cant switch between audiostreams, they all play at once or it looks like you only have one if you don't have the right codecs. especially if its mkv
but you said you have an editor so i dunno

That would explain why I have 3 audios in the editor and only 1 to choose from in WMP classic.


kahljorn Mar 28th, 2012 06:54 PM

did you find the one? Combined community codec pack
http://www.cccp-project.net/

Tadao Mar 29th, 2012 01:12 AM

Nope hadn't given it too much thought. Downloading it now though. Thanks for making it easy for my lazy ass.


Esuohlim Mar 29th, 2012 05:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 756746)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 756760)

Now make them melt

Tadao Mar 29th, 2012 04:03 PM

NO

ThrashO Mar 29th, 2012 04:49 PM

post more cock gifs

Esuohlim Mar 29th, 2012 05:01 PM


kahljorn Mar 29th, 2012 05:15 PM

i wikipedied that

lol silken joggingsuits

Tadao Mar 29th, 2012 07:56 PM

Milhouse is a chav :eek


Zhukov Mar 29th, 2012 09:06 PM

That's a Ned that you've posted there Tadao.



Same thing though, so whatever. What do you call them in the US? They're bogans here.

Esuohlim Mar 29th, 2012 09:15 PM

White trash, I guess? Do we even have an equivalent?

Otto Mar 29th, 2012 09:18 PM

I wonder if I can just duct tape my hands to the steering wheel and sleep on my ride home from the tattoo parlor tomorrow.

Zhukov Mar 29th, 2012 09:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 756785)
White trash, I guess? Do we even have an equivalent?

I guess it would be a combination of white trash and wiggers.


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