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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

noob3 Apr 30th, 2007 09:30 AM

wtf is that guy micheal jackson's emo clone from hell

Womti Apr 30th, 2007 01:54 PM

what the photoshop

MarioRPG Apr 30th, 2007 08:33 PM

Good one.

Big McLargehuge May 1st, 2007 01:34 AM

Hey do you like this stanza?

And if she direct me, i be a perfect little man, boy.
Boy, and if she direct me, i keep all things holy, war,
holy, fire and fight.

Sam May 1st, 2007 02:04 AM

I knew you couldn't stay away you big slut. :wink

Supafly345 May 1st, 2007 06:26 AM

I also do parties

MarioRPG May 1st, 2007 03:51 PM

I went to court today! I saw many cases thrown out!

MattJack May 5th, 2007 06:20 AM

Need help in that "special" place? But you don't want to take prescription pills with side effects? Or do the pills simply not "work?"

Well now you have a new option!


A new device that connects to your "special" male part and let's you be 18 for up to 30mins again!

Wait, how does it work you ask?


Plug in your home vacuum, lock on the POS-T-VAC Tube, put the suck-tube on your di*k, and within 4 minutes you will be 18 all over again!


BlueOatmeal May 5th, 2007 12:13 PM

FUCK YES GUYS! No more remedial math for me!

Fathom Zero May 5th, 2007 04:40 PM

Supafly, those are incredibly scary pictures.

They're freaking me out.

Seven Force May 5th, 2007 11:47 PM

I hope to god that's photoshopped

MattJack May 6th, 2007 08:07 PM


Esuohlim May 9th, 2007 07:22 PM

Using i-mockery.net no longer works for me so I thought the boards have been down since Friday :x

MetalMilitia May 10th, 2007 08:20 PM

I was wondering why the forum had been extremely slow for the past day or so and then I noticed that an i-mock story was on the front page of the gaming section of DIGG, which would probably explain it.

Mockery May 11th, 2007 03:53 PM


Originally Posted by MetalMilitia (Post 490692)
I was wondering why the forum had been extremely slow for the past day or so and then I noticed that an i-mock story was on the front page of the gaming section of DIGG, which would probably explain it.

Yep, that was it... one of our pieces was the #1 dugg article in gaming yesterday so there was a lot of inbound traffic. The main site stayed up no problemo, but anything like the forums which work with a database were slowed down to a crawl. I'm currently talking with our host about upgrading the server (again).

kahljorn May 12th, 2007 05:05 PM

so my brother-in-law has been spending the night for the last two days...

the first night he gets so drunk that he wakes up in the middle of the night and pisses through the screen door onto the porch.
last night he got so drunk... well, we saw his car parked out front, but we didn't see him inside our house, so we thought he carpooled with somebody. Eventually i was looking through a window and saw a man passed out on a lawn across the street. GUESS WHO? then it turns out he lost his keys, and he just so happened to have our spare house key with him.
fucking dumbass.

Shyandquietguy May 12th, 2007 07:38 PM

Fucking Christ dude, I don't know if I'd be able to even look at a person like that. :(

When I was riding the bus I saw this really old woman who was drunk and she was sitting right behind a cerebral palsy girl in a wheel chair, the woman ended up barfing in the girl's grocery bags that were hung on the wheel chair before she was kicked off the bus. :(

Shyandquietguy May 12th, 2007 08:01 PM

Holy sh*t man I must be on some kind of high I've never posted this much before

Shyandquietguy May 12th, 2007 08:04 PM

Seriously don't even try to f*cking bum me out.

No one can bum me out today.

kahljorn May 13th, 2007 04:44 PM

luckily he just locked his keys in the car.

lol that shit was funny. i used to black out a lot but i never fell asleep in weird places really, or peed on doors...
one time in some bushes but just because i didn't want to walk home but they were sparse hiding bushes at a park.

MattJack May 14th, 2007 05:44 AM

:lol Your brother-in-law is awesome. I love that guy that everyone knows that just passes out everywhere.

I have a friend who always talked about how he could out drink, smoke, fuck, drive, game, and anything under sun you. Well one night he was drinking with us and went around the corner of the house outside.

I walked outside to take a piss a bit later and I see him laying face down on the ground. When I went to go fireman carry his ass back, I noticed he fell down on a fucking ant bed! Funniest shit ever, also he had about 300 bites on him.

Jixby Phillips May 15th, 2007 02:04 AM



kahljorn May 15th, 2007 02:05 AM

after this weekend here's my new theory on blacking out: it makes you do everything opposite! For example, when he pissed through the screen door, the bathroom was the same distance in the opposite direction! When he passed out on the lawn, he walked in the opposite direction of my door.

FartinMowler May 15th, 2007 08:08 AM

I'm writing some words for a punk song contest...

The beginning goes like this (I just talk).

I was lying on a beach when a pretty girl comes up to me and says "Oh my god are you Al Gore?" and I almost say "are you stupid?" but I hold up my drink and say "Can't you see the ice in my drink is melting?, get me a fresh one and this time put a Cherry on top"

...and then the song begins with a drum beat/bass line and me singing "I grabbed her hand and we swim in the Ocean, saved a Dolphin and hug a tree, turned of my Cell phone so not do divert some in flying Bee's, I'm Al Gore"

I'm still thinking of the rest

MetalMilitia May 15th, 2007 05:48 PM

If it's a punk song it needs to be all in your face like "pre-heat your face to gas mark shut up".

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