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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Colonel Flagg Jul 1st, 2011 10:47 AM

And I wonder why the government can't balance the budget. :lol2

Shrubfest Jul 1st, 2011 02:45 PM

Computer problems=solved :D

Man bought a brand new one, found the disks to rejig mammas. The universe rights itself once more.

Pub Lover Jul 1st, 2011 02:54 PM


Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 729178)
Whatever your man does is your own fault since you didn't teach him otherwise.

Because women have to mother their men. :eek

Pub Lover Jul 1st, 2011 02:55 PM

I was also going to make a joke about short men but I feel too sick by your gross loveline nonsense. All of you should be ashamed. :x

Shrubfest Jul 1st, 2011 03:09 PM

Shush you! Now lick my boot.

Kitsa Jul 1st, 2011 04:49 PM

Ahh, there's nothing quite so satisfying as running into someone who used to torment you for your looks, only to find they've grown quite fat and unattractive in the intervening years :)

Ah, fat triple-chinned, big-assed contentment :)

Kitsa Jul 1st, 2011 05:36 PM

Was behind this guy today.

Otto Jul 1st, 2011 05:47 PM


Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 729196)
Ahh, there's nothing quite so satisfying as running into someone who used to torment you for your looks, only to find they've grown quite fat and unattractive in the intervening years :)

Ah, fat triple-chinned, big-assed contentment :)

I didn't even have to wait until after high-school to find out that most of the jerks that annoyed me either got busted for running meth labs, got knocked up by a member of the football team and dropped out, or got shot by a surly Korean while trying to rob a liquor store. South Carolina is kind of like a failure timewarp.

Also my eyesight's not very good, is Gizmo flipping me off?

Pentegarn Jul 1st, 2011 06:13 PM


Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 729203)
Was behind this guy today.

Man next time it rains his roof is fucked

Kitsa Jul 1st, 2011 06:49 PM


Originally Posted by Otto (Post 729207)

Also my eyesight's not very good, is Gizmo flipping me off?

He is indeed.

Fathom Zero Jul 1st, 2011 09:36 PM


Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 729192)
We have different definitions of biting, then. I guess it's closer to nibbling, yeh.

Of course, even this is a far cry from my usual move where I punch a girl in the tit as hard as I can and throw my arms up in the air like a prizefighter.

Pub Lover Jul 1st, 2011 09:48 PM

Do you then yank on her pigtails and snap her bra strap?

Fathom Zero Jul 1st, 2011 09:52 PM

naw, I towel off the blood and walk out the room like a pimp

Otto Jul 1st, 2011 09:57 PM

All of my encounters like that happen in a room of my house specially designed to resemble the "action room" from Videodrome and I make the girls stick their hands in my chest-VCR.

executioneer Jul 1st, 2011 10:07 PM


edit: the hell, I edited the thread title why didnt it change


Shyandquietguy Jul 1st, 2011 10:32 PM


Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 729152)
my dad's jeep has that problem, and when they took it to the dealership for a fix they tried to tell him that it was caused by his taping the window up.

Uh, no, taping the window up came after the damn window motor failed.

Was that the service writer? The best way to deal with that is sneak into the work area and ask the mechanics why they think it was the tape causing the issue. You'll be escorted out due to no customers in the work areas. Service writer will get a demerit and eventually get fired for trying to slip in advice.

PS: I agree for manual everything unless you work on your car!

Chojin Jul 2nd, 2011 01:35 AM


Originally Posted by Otto (Post 729117)
Considering I've managed to lose about ten pounds over the last week, I'd say it's working quite well

dear fatties of the world: losing a lot of weight in one or two weeks doesn't mean anything. it's likely from a highly variable source like water and will return by the end of the month. also prz stop being so obsessed with weight because your body contains many more things than fat which you can gain or lose. the 10 pounds was probably your liver and kidneys escaping and leaving with all their luggage. get caliper'd or try on tighter clothes and then see how it goes, and you can stop lying to yourself.

i was going to continue this post with a discussion of PSMFs/low-carb diets and Clen, but then I remembered that I'm the only person here who actually knows anything slash cares slash fuck you

i might be extra aggressive from my trip to the gym in retrospect

Guitar Woman Jul 2nd, 2011 01:56 AM

Everyone's just afraid that if they get into shape, they'll end up acting fucking weird about it like you.

I guess insanity is the price we pay for those six packs.

Chojin Jul 2nd, 2011 02:03 AM


i think my pathological hatred of fat people stems from me formerly being one and seeing how easy it actually is to educate yourself and fix it. it's a combination of the simplicity of doing it, the disrespect for the self in not doing it, and a hatred of my past self on a Karkat level

ItalianStereotype Jul 2nd, 2011 02:08 AM

He's right though. Fat hate is fun too.

Esuohlim Jul 2nd, 2011 02:08 AM

Work out, eat healthy, exercise, WE'LL ALL END UP IN THE FUCKING GROUND ANYWAY :(

Jack Lalanne didn't even live to 100 like that pussy George Burns

ItalianStereotype Jul 2nd, 2011 02:11 AM

Death would be too busy mirin my sick abs

Chojin Jul 2nd, 2011 02:23 AM

why improve your life when it's just going to end? with that reasoning, why ever do anything? bracing myself for WAY AHEAD OF YOU THERE BUDDY HA HA

fat people tend to act like they're enjoying a neverending festival of culinary delights equivalent to a nonstop train of blowjobs from swimsuit models. i hear the "life's too short, enjoy yourself" shit a lot (second to excuses about genetics, invulnerability to caloric deficits, and the like). thing is, fatties hate themselves, they aren't satisfied with their lives, and not spending every evening ordering pizza is just not that fucking difficult. enjoy triggering your natural responses to oversatiety for a brief chemical rush, assholes. if you'd just jerk off every time you had the desire to eat a stuffed crust, you'd have the same effect without becoming a burden on society. being slovenly and gluttonous is fun for about 12 hours; making it a lifestyle just causes you to hate yourself and me to hate you. SOCIETY IS BENDING TO YOUR WILL BECAUSE YOU ARE POWERLESS TO NOT SPEND YOUR MONEY ON SHIT TO TEMPORARILY FILL YOUR FLESHY EUPHORIA CREVICES. YOU ARE UNABLE TO CONTROL YOUR MOST BASIC DESIRES. YOU ARE NOTHING BUT AN ANIMAL. YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN A RAPIST.

i once left a comment like that on a "fat acceptance" video and probably ruined some peoples' afternoons

kahljorn Jul 2nd, 2011 02:27 AM

they had a fat awareness thing at my school once

i guess its ok to be fat now

executioneer Jul 2nd, 2011 02:29 AM

it is not either

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