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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Fathom Zero Jun 25th, 2010 02:50 PM

I was watching the Comedians of Comedy and they all agreed on Atlantic City being the most sad and depressing place on Earth.

Kitsa Jun 25th, 2010 02:53 PM

Oh, it is. As I left I vowed to never, ever, ever go back.

What do you think of the Atlantic City Hookers? Or are you at work and unable to watch?

Babs Jun 25th, 2010 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Leader (Post 690221)
:lol Are you good at anything?

So asks Louie Anderson's aborted fetus.

The Leader Jun 25th, 2010 03:06 PM

All you can muster is fat jokes, huh? You know you can wait and come up with something better before you post, there's no time constraint.

Kitsa Jun 25th, 2010 03:08 PM

fucking mall-hippies, why did you have to screw up columbus this weekend

Dimnos Jun 25th, 2010 03:09 PM

Cant smoke a cig because it unprofessional. :lol

Shrubfest Jun 25th, 2010 03:12 PM

Damn you Kitsa, I'm now sitting watching the other parts.

Kitsa Jun 25th, 2010 03:21 PM

In one of the parts (and this is only from what I remember because I watched the whole thing through a long time ago), a hooker takes a guy into an abandoned building/crackhouse. I could see that very crackhouse from my hotel window when I was staying there. It was a weird, unpleasant sort of deja-vu.

The Leader Jun 25th, 2010 03:22 PM

You should have dropped in to say hi.

Babs Jun 25th, 2010 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Leader (Post 690230)
All you can muster is fat jokes, huh? You know you can wait and come up with something better before you post, there's no time constraint.

I mean if all you get out of Louie Anderson is him being fat, then my chudish friend, you have a very limited perception.

p.s. I'm calling you dead weight, a waste (hence the aborted part of a failed glutton). Poor kid can't take a hint :(

The Leader Jun 25th, 2010 03:27 PM

I never knew you had such a deep seated hatred for Louie Anderson or people who wear multiple t-shirts. :O

Babs Jun 25th, 2010 03:35 PM

:notfunny

The Leader Jun 25th, 2010 03:37 PM

This is just sad.

The Leader Jun 25th, 2010 03:40 PM

Is this how you get people to stop writing mean things about you, you make them feel bad for you?

Dimnos Jun 25th, 2010 03:50 PM



The future is now!

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 25th, 2010 04:48 PM

:( I tried clicking a bunch of times before I got it.

Kitsa Jun 25th, 2010 04:56 PM

I've heard of people who lose stuff on their desk and start moving around shit on their desktops to look for it.

Fathom Zero Jun 25th, 2010 05:00 PM

That can't be real. THAT CAN'T BE REAL.

kahljorn Jun 25th, 2010 06:42 PM

:lol lazy plagiarism?

Fathom Zero Jun 26th, 2010 06:27 AM

My tics are acting up again. :(

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 26th, 2010 09:54 AM

When I worked at blockbuster I had to write down a phone number for a customer. I copied the number with my mouse on the computer screen, then clicked paste and was looking at a sheet of paper wondering why the number did paste to it. Was a bit sleep deprived at the time but when I realized what I was trying to do I was just like "oh wow."

Babs Jun 26th, 2010 02:00 PM

God damn cinemageddon blocked my IP address >:

The Leader Jun 26th, 2010 03:11 PM

What did you do? :(

Babs Jun 26th, 2010 03:22 PM

Probably because my username there was random letters and numbers thinking I was a spam bot. I was a VIP though and active for 4 years so most likely I must of pissed of an admin somehow. Guess I have to spam F5 until a new slot opens.

RaNkeri Jun 26th, 2010 06:31 PM

¡ɥɐǝʎ ʞɔnɟ 'ǝɔıʌ ıɯɐıɯ

Fathom Zero Jun 26th, 2010 07:59 PM


Kitsa Jun 26th, 2010 08:47 PM

I've had a very long weekend and can't go into specifics but I am considering whiskey and possibly therapy.

Colonel Flagg Jun 26th, 2010 09:59 PM

Enough whiskey and the therapy becomes moot. ;)

Colonel Flagg Jun 26th, 2010 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690226)
I spent a very bad couple days of my life in Atlantic City. Not only is the place a rat-infested shithole with nasty, sludge-y, filthy beaches, but the casinos were so very sad. There were many old people chain-smoking and wheeling oxygen tanks (???) (!!!) and they all had big keyrings full of plastic rewards cards that they plugged into the machines. When they won, they got little slips of paper that had to be turned in at an office for cash. I never won more than a few dollars.

How long ago?

Back in the mid '80's I attended a conference in AC. A whole bunch of us students crashed on the floor in a room at the Claridge, getting up whenever someone staggered in from having one too many. The stuff about oxygen tanks and rewards cards on the gaming floor brought back all the unpleasant memories.

The place being a rat-infested shithole was true for at least the previous 40 years - way before casino gambling was legalized.

Other than that, have a great time! :x

Kitsa Jun 26th, 2010 10:39 PM

2003.

Zhukov Jun 27th, 2010 01:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dimnos (Post 690225)
With the credits there should be a booth somewhere you can turn your credits/chips in for cash.

No they weren't chips or anything, you won digital credits that let you have another go pressing the 'play' button, no chance to cash them in or something like that. I suppose it was possible to win money/chips/whatever, but most people just win credits.

I don't really have to say it, but everything about these machines is designed to take your money and not give it back. Yet people still play them every single day of their lives until they are put in jail for unpaid taxes/bills. Insane.

Kitsa Jun 27th, 2010 01:45 PM

I hate casinos. It was interesting to see, I guess, but it was depressing/frightening.

At least at arcades you get a bit of fun for the money, and can win nominal prizes every now and then.

Pub Lover Jun 27th, 2010 06:45 PM


Colonel Flagg Jun 27th, 2010 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690343)
2003.

Nice to see things haven't changed.

Tadao Jun 27th, 2010 10:59 PM


Kitsa Jun 27th, 2010 11:01 PM

BOW DOWN BEFORE THE EFFECTIVE SEGUE!

http://www.gravesitemasters.com/Funn...lers-C196.aspx

Tadao Jun 27th, 2010 11:12 PM

How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?

Spoilers!

Colonel Flagg Jun 27th, 2010 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 690407)
How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?

Spoilers!

Tadao Jun 27th, 2010 11:51 PM

I am formally requesting emoticons of smaller version of 10k's nightmare.








Colonel Flagg Jun 27th, 2010 11:57 PM

:lol times about 10,000

Kitsa Jun 28th, 2010 12:47 AM

I like the last one best.

Babs Jun 28th, 2010 12:54 AM

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse....gi?u=cam_whore

She's still in the learning process.

Colonel Flagg Jun 28th, 2010 01:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690417)
I like the last one best.

Bill's expression screams "SOMEBODY SHOOT ME RIGHT NOW GODDAMMIT!"

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 28th, 2010 01:04 AM

You will summon the beast with those.

Pub Lover Jun 28th, 2010 01:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 689690)
Amazing how fast good evenings go to shit.

Anyway, I was at a concert earlier this evening and some guy looked like Jake Busey and all I could think was I FOOKED UR MOM. And fuck you guys for ruining it for me :(

Yay! :domo
Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 689836)
Quote:

Originally Posted by MarioRPG (Post 689801)
Oh hey guys I'm back from Fiji

WHAT COLOUR WERE THE HATS AT THE HOTDOG STAND :religiousdebate

Was he breeding horses with a sheep and cow? :eek
Quote:

Originally Posted by Wiffles (Post 690189)
Isnt it time we removed the "HEY KGP4DEATH CAN YOU SEE THIS" part of this topic title? Its kinda getting old ^.^;

No! He hasn't learned his lesson. >:

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 28th, 2010 01:05 AM

I want an airhorn emoticon.

Colonel Flagg Jun 28th, 2010 01:29 AM

Those photos made me go back and reread the "Defenestrate" thread.

Memories .... Like the corners of my mind
Misty water-colored memories
Of the way we were

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 28th, 2010 02:24 AM


Tadao Jun 28th, 2010 02:30 AM


10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 28th, 2010 02:39 AM

SON OF A BITCH

Sam Jun 28th, 2010 03:52 AM

AIRHORN EMOTICON

kahljorn Jun 28th, 2010 07:30 AM



the defenestrate the ex thread is just perfect now that 10kbghost's posts have airhorns at thebottom of them

Kitsa Jun 28th, 2010 09:41 AM

I don't even know what the airhorn thing means and I'm too proud to google it

kahljorn Jun 28th, 2010 09:50 AM

:lol
its one of 10kghosts infamous sex moves

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 28th, 2010 10:07 AM

I'm at work so I won't be able to explain the airhorn till I get home. Someone else is more than welcome to give Kitsa the rundown. I may have only told a few people about it.

Dimnos Jun 28th, 2010 12:49 PM

The short and skinny is that he had an airhorn at hand while bumping uglies with some girl. At some point after or before her "moment" he blasted her in the face with the horn. :lol At least thats how I remember the story going.

Dimnos Jun 28th, 2010 01:26 PM


Sam Jun 28th, 2010 02:13 PM

THEY SHOULD HAVE USED A PICTURE OF THE FACE HE ACTUALLY MAKES WHEN HE DOES THE TRUFFLE SHUFFLE.

THOSE FAGGOTS. >:

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 28th, 2010 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dimnos (Post 690458)
The short and skinny is that he had an airhorn at hand while bumping uglies with some girl. At some point after or before her "moment" he blasted her in the face with the horn. :lol At least thats how I remember the story going.

Pretty close. It was during my moment...and with the crazy.

Sam Jun 28th, 2010 02:41 PM

NO ONE DESERVED IT MORE.

NOW BILL NEEDS A VUVUZELA TO BLOW.

The Leader Jun 28th, 2010 03:00 PM

:lol

Tadao Jun 28th, 2010 03:19 PM


MarioRPG Jun 28th, 2010 03:31 PM

That is pure hawtness.

Fathom Zero Jun 28th, 2010 05:28 PM


Kitsa Jun 28th, 2010 09:50 PM

I just made like 100 oreo balls for one office party and have to make another 300 or so for a party this weekend.

:(

Zhukov Jun 28th, 2010 11:25 PM

I'm assuming you don't get paid for this either.

You need to stop agreeing to be a slave, Kitsa.

Kitsa Jun 28th, 2010 11:32 PM

I got volunteered, and I'm trying to cheer myself up about it by regarding it as a compliment to my candy-making skillz.

it gets me through the day.

Zhukov Jun 28th, 2010 11:57 PM

Claim expenses on tax, ask work for ingredients money.

Fathom Zero Jun 28th, 2010 11:59 PM

I'm chewing on a SATA cable, guys. I've got a terrible habit.

Zhukov Jun 29th, 2010 12:08 AM

You need to ween yourself onto LAN cables or something. You can do it.

Guitar Woman Jun 29th, 2010 01:09 AM

someone teach me how the fuck the Substitution Method works

Don't laugh, either, I'm a medically certified mathematical retard and finding it humorous makes you an insensitive bastard

kahljorn Jun 29th, 2010 01:23 AM

use your math skills to solve as far as you can for x or y and your answer will be something like x=2y+7 then you put that into the other equation which has a Y part so it ends up looking like 7(2y+7) +3y or some shit and then you can solve for y.

Guitar Woman Jun 29th, 2010 01:29 AM

Man when the fuck am I ever gonna use this, ever

College is definitely a step-up from high school but god damn does math still suck a massive cock

10,000 Volt Ghost Jun 29th, 2010 02:08 AM

Seriously...you'll never fucking use college or even high school math except to tell someone you have an associate degree of something or some such. I'm a math/science major but with no diploma and since I don't have a piece of paper saying such I don't get shit.

Fathom Zero Jun 29th, 2010 02:22 AM

I only need a semester of College Algebra.

I failed it the first time. :(

Esuohlim Jun 29th, 2010 04:31 AM

Quit complaining you pussies

HERE'S YOUR MOTIVATION: Jobs that use math will make you a lot of money. If you suck at math you'll end up like Tadao with a vasectomy and a fused spine.

THE CHOICE IS YOURS

Esuohlim Jun 29th, 2010 04:35 AM

I'm good at math and science, but I'm absolutely terrible at history, geography, social sciences, economics, english, reading comprehension, foreign languages, communcations, art, and having muscles >:

Esuohlim Jun 29th, 2010 04:36 AM

YOU MSIED THE PAGE VRAK >madrolleyes

Esuohlim Jun 29th, 2010 04:39 AM

Btw GW the Substitution method is when you get some nerd to take your tests for you in exchange for Miller Lite, you'll never get throuhg college if you don't learn the tricks >:

Esuohlim Jun 29th, 2010 04:40 AM

:pagebrak

Esuohlim Jun 29th, 2010 04:40 AM

>:

Zhukov Jun 29th, 2010 04:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 690567)
I'm good at math and science, but I'm absolutely terrible at history, geography, social sciences, economics, english, reading comprehension, foreign languages, communcations, art, and having muscles >:

Ha, that's quite a coincidence, since I am good at history, geography, social sciences, economics, English, reading comprehension, foreign languages, communications and art, but I suck at maths, science and having muscles. >:

Esuohlim Jun 29th, 2010 05:36 AM

We need to find someone good at having muscles. Then we can be the I-Mock dream team :(

executioneer Jun 29th, 2010 05:41 AM

AHEM

Zhukov Jun 29th, 2010 06:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 690574)
We need to find someone good at having muscles. Then we can be the I-Mock dream team :(

If we had a baby and it was a girl it would be pretty much perfect.

Kitsa Jun 29th, 2010 06:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 690554)
I only need a semester of College Algebra.

I failed it the first time. :(


You know, you might not be as big an idiot as you think. My mechanical engineer father and I were both trying to help Mr. Kitsa finish his only required semester of college Algebra a couple of years ago, and it was pretty wacky. They were doing some weird left-field shit that was making our heads spin. I don't know what crack they were smoking when they wrote his algebra text, but it may have been the same book you had.

We were all cocky about it, too, it was like OH YEAH PICK ALGEBRA THAT'S EASY, WE'LL HELP YOU.

It didn't help that that particular course was an online version and the instructor wanted you to "show your work" in some sort of absolutely fucked online fill-in-the-blank format that broke half the time and didn't fit your answers the other half.

Pentegarn Jun 29th, 2010 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690577)
You know, you might not be as big an idiot as you think. My mechanical engineer father and I were both trying to help Mr. Kitsa finish his only required semester of college Algebra a couple of years ago, and it was pretty wacky. They were doing some weird left-field shit that was making our heads spin. I don't know what crack they were smoking when they wrote his algebra text, but it may have been the same book you had.

We were all cocky about it, too, it was like OH YEAH PICK ALGEBRA THAT'S EASY, WE'LL HELP YOU.

It didn't help that that particular course was an online version and the instructor wanted you to "show your work" in some sort of absolutely fucked online fill-in-the-blank format that broke half the time and didn't fit your answers the other half.

What you do in that situation is use a flip to record yourself typing in the answers, upload it to youtube, and posting the link to it in the 'show your work' box

Zhukov Jun 29th, 2010 08:30 AM

I want to take online courses for things, but not if they are wacky.


Also, I got in the newspaper again for the 'street talk' segment, but I'm not posting a picture this time because I look like an utter, utter wanker. Plus my comment was raped to pieces and turned into what an idiot would say when asked if brothels should be legalised, rather than what an intelligent person would say. So there you go.

Kitsa Jun 29th, 2010 08:52 AM

I was hoping to see what an utter, utter wanker would look like.

I hate talking to reporters for that very reason...they can take something completely out of context, piece something together, make it whatever they need it to be to prove whatever point they want to make, and they don't care if you look like a moron in the bargain.

kahljorn Jun 29th, 2010 09:04 AM

you should take her article and write an article about what journalists with no journalistic integrity or objectivity would do.

i think one time i used the substitution method maybe when i was calculating a conversion for a reciple :(

Fathom Zero Jun 29th, 2010 10:50 AM

http://consumerist.com/2010/06/mmm-c...doughnuts.html

MUST FUCKING HAVE SOME


Zhukov Jun 29th, 2010 11:14 AM

I've had a Krispy Kreme doughnut only once. :( and Cheerwine looks like it would taste good, too.


Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 690585)
I was hoping to see what an utter, utter wanker would look like.

They look like a smug prick with their chin tucked into his neck and half an open mouth.

The Leader Jun 29th, 2010 12:01 PM

:lol I've got to see the picture now.

Dimnos Jun 29th, 2010 12:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 690593)


Arent you in Texas right now? Go to Shipleys mofo. :yum


Zhukov. If you dont want to show us the pic can you at least post what you said and what they printed?

Colonel Flagg Jun 29th, 2010 12:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 690587)
i think one time i used the substitution method maybe when i was calculating a conversion for a reciple :(

I use Algebra nearly every frigging day of my life. It's part of what I get paid to do. :themoreyouknow

Dimnos Jun 29th, 2010 12:55 PM

GW. Three or five years from now when your cooking your own bathtub crack you will use all these pointless math skills.

Zhukov Jun 29th, 2010 01:12 PM

:lol ^


I was asked if brothels should be legal in Tasmania, I replied that it's a difficult question that can't be answered easily and certainly needs a lot of investigation and research done before it is legalised, but it's not going to go away just because it's illegal, so I think it's better to have it regulated and under some sort of control than underground and unsafe to all involved.

[IMG][/IMG]

I got a lot of morons at work asking me if I'd had bad experiences with brothels in the past etc etc.

Tadao Jun 29th, 2010 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 690566)
Quit complaining you pussies

HERE'S YOUR MOTIVATION: Jobs that use math will make you a lot of money. If you suck at math you'll end up like Tadao with a vasectomy and a fused spine.

THE CHOICE IS YOURS

That's only because I defied the asian gods.

Colonel Flagg Jun 29th, 2010 03:14 PM

^^^ ... and you learned your lesson, right?

Tadao Jun 29th, 2010 03:44 PM

Hell no. Math can soduko my balls


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