I-Mockery Forum

I-Mockery Forum (http://i-mockery.com/forum/index.php)
-   Movies & Television (http://i-mockery.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=16)
-   -   House of 1000 Corpses (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2384)

Mockery Apr 12th, 2003 03:41 PM

I really does. And believe me, being such a big horror flick fan, I was really looking forward to this movie. HUGE let-down. :/

Zomboid Apr 12th, 2003 05:56 PM

Damnit, mockery. It's not THAT bad. You gave it a 1 when bill moseley (chop top, HEATHENS >: ) and sid haig alone make it good enough for a 3 >:

I'm not saying it deserves anything higher than 3, but damnit, you're not respecting bill moseley and sid haig >: .

Geggy Apr 12th, 2003 05:56 PM

That's surprising to hear. I've always loved Rob Zombie's artwork and music. I thought he would have the knack for making a bloodshed type of horror film but I guess not.

Hmm...something smells fishy here...I bet the reason for the movie sucking so bad had to do with the MPA ratings and had to cut down on the gore and violence to give it an R rating. If I'm right then hopefully there will be an uncut version of this movie released on dvd in the future, with blood, gore, naked chicks and more blood.

Mockery Apr 12th, 2003 05:59 PM

Military Messiah also went to see it last night with some friends and they ALL hated it too. The movie sucks, I don't care who's in it. Walken could be in it and the movie still couldn't be saved.

Zomboid Apr 12th, 2003 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mockery
Walken could be in it and the movie still couldn't be saved.

:faint

Anyway, I'm done arguing. I pretty much agree with you on everything but I still think those two made it a little better.

If you're looking for a good, but recent movie, rent dog soldiers. The name kinda sucks but it's like evil dead 2 with werewolves.

Cap'n Crunch Apr 13th, 2003 12:57 AM

Should I bother seeing it?

Mockery Apr 13th, 2003 01:29 AM

If there was an award for "posting stupid questions most frequently", it would be dangling from your neck.

Cap'n Crunch Apr 13th, 2003 01:32 AM

That means no.

Chris P. Bacon Apr 13th, 2003 01:53 AM

1000 Corpses
 
I agree with you Zomboid, it is much better than the bullshit being passed off at "horror" these days (I Know What you Did Last Summer anyone....). Some of the camera effects got a little old and some of the acting and tee hee laughing was lame but it's worth seeing if your into this kind of thing. It's plotless, pointless and pretty much what I expected. I still can't believe that it actually played in my shitsplat town. Bagger Vance, GI Jane, and Forrest Gump was filmed here so Savannah's all "Hollywoodish" now.

Cap'n Crunch Apr 13th, 2003 02:40 AM

I read the Mock's movie review on it, and it sounded exactly like what you just posted.

Anonymous Apr 13th, 2003 03:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cap'n Crunch
Should I bother seeing it?

Yes Cap'n Crunch, in fact, buy 5 tickets in advance so you can see every showing of it for one entire day. You won't regret it. Seriously.:|

Cap'n Crunch Apr 13th, 2003 03:29 AM

I downloaded it and seen it. The movie is a terrible attempt at a horror flick. I feel bad for anyone else who watched this garbage. I WON'T BUY ANY TICKETS!

noob3 Apr 13th, 2003 06:01 AM

Who cares?

Zomboid Apr 13th, 2003 06:12 AM

Sneaky noob...

Anyway, in reply to what your post said before you edited it: Resident Evil (the movie) sucked. Any good parts were ripped off from GOOD horror movies and almost every character was annoying.

Krythor Apr 13th, 2003 12:09 PM

Quote:

If you're looking for a good, but recent movie, rent dog soldiers. The name kinda sucks but it's like evil dead 2 with werewolves.
Definitely. I loved that movie. It had great action, plenty of black comedy and a somewhat decent plot. The werewolves could've looked better, but other than that it was a winner. I would definitely recommend it for anyone who hasn't seen it yet.

James Apr 13th, 2003 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mockery
I really does. And believe me, being such a big horror flick fan, I was really looking forward to this movie. HUGE let-down. :/

As opposed to the award winning Jason X and Resident Evil that you seem to have such a boner for? :|

Seriously though, I don't know what to think either way. When it comes to horror movies, people are torn so much between what's good and what's bad.

My friend saw it last night, and she said that she cried, it freaked her out so much. That's not saying much though (she screamed at the new Tenchu commercial, when you find out the chick is a dude). But I'll check it out when it's out for rental.

And one more note: It's NEVER a good idea to review something immediately after watching/listening to/playing it. That's why I ended up giving Disturbed's album straight 9's. It's still fucking awesome, but I didn't give it enough time to sink in and reflect on it.

Mockery Apr 13th, 2003 03:11 PM

Jason X was fucking hilarious. House of 1000 Corpses was not.

Resident Evil, though majorly lacking in gore, stayed true to the video games, making it the best movie based on a game so far. The only thing House of 1000 Corpses might be loosely based on is Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and if so, it's very... very weak.

Not true, there are some things that you don't need to let "sink in". When a movie is so absolutely shitty, with no value whatsoever, it's deserving of a verbal onslaught. But you know, maybe you're right... maybe I should have let it "sink in" a little longer, maybe then I wouldn't have been so easy on it when I reviewed it. >:

Go see it. It sucks. Enjoy.

The_Rorschach Apr 13th, 2003 03:59 PM

You know, I kind of stopped watching Jason movies around three or four. The last one I saw was the one where he was killed by being thrown off of a barn and being impaled on a bunch of spikes that the farmer happened have lying around, and then the guy who killed him put on his mask. Think that was four.

Anyway, I downloaded X last night - because I could - and I couldn't sit through it. I've seen better Sci Fi Channel made-for-teevee- movies. The acting was overdone, the effects cheesy, and, well, Jason was this huge dumb dude that walked as slowly as possible, which wasn't how I remembered him at all - the only unforgivable aspect to the movie really, because the movie might have been kind of amusing otherwise.

Zomboid Apr 13th, 2003 04:11 PM

Hey! >:

Jason X was like a gift to the fans of the series after years of shit like scream. It had gory deaths, it was funny and it didn't take itself too seriously. It wasn't trying to scare anyone and be clever like those lame halloween sequels. It was actually made to be cheesy.

Once again though, resident evil blows ass. I'm not gonna repeat what I've already said about it, but technically, mortal kombat's the most faithful game to movie adaption >:

James Apr 13th, 2003 04:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mockery
Resident Evil, though majorly lacking in gore, stayed true to the video games, making it the best movie based on a game so far.

See, I think it was one of the worst, because they tried to set it up as a prequel (which then jumps right into RE2), so they didn't have to stay true to anything from the games. Thank God RE0 shot all their ideas into the shitter. I was going to make a rant about how much I hated this movie, but I ended up with 2 1/2 pages of things wrong with it before I even got to the fucking commandos breaking into the mansion.

I think accuracy in a game-to-movie translation is reserved for Mortal Kombat. With the exception of Scorpion, Sub-Zero, Reptile, and Shang Tsung's physical appearance, everything was spot-on with the game's storyline.

Quote:

Not true, there are some things that you don't need to let "sink in". When a movie is so absolutely shitty, with no value whatsoever, it's deserving of a verbal onslaught. But you know, maybe you're right... maybe I should have let it "sink in" a little longer, maybe then I wouldn't have been so easy on it when I reviewed it. >:
I'm just saying: Much like my Disturbed review was borderline fanboyism, your review is angry ranting. If you had given it some time, you probably would have been able to compose your thoughts better, and in turn been harder on it. But I digress. :/

Mockery Apr 13th, 2003 05:33 PM

Mortal Kombat was horrible. Absolutely horrible. I couldn't even sit through either of those movies. The games were good but the movie made me want to destroy the games, so I definitely don't think they win for best translation. Worst acting and effects, perhaps.

As for ranting, that's part of what the site's for. :blah

James Apr 13th, 2003 06:27 PM

Hey hey. Don't say "they." I'm referring to the first one only. >:

And yeah, the acting sucked at times, and some of the scenary was stupid (Shang Tsung has a statue fetish, apparently), and the final battle was pretty lame. But I felt that the majority of the fights were executed nicely, and the script's story stayed close to the games (with the exceptions I already stated).

I'm not saying it was perfect, but it's the best you're gonna get, until people start listening to me when it comes to making a movie based on a video game. >:

Zomboid Apr 13th, 2003 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mockery
Mortal Kombat was horrible. Absolutely horrible. I couldn't even sit through either of those movies. The games were good but the movie made me want to destroy the games, so I definitely don't think they win for best translation. Worst acting and effects, perhaps.

Yes, the acting sucked, but it still followed the story, which is more than you can say for RE. The acting AND the story sucked in that one.

FeuerAffe Apr 13th, 2003 07:50 PM

The bastards opened this only at the far away movie theatre, not the nice close one where I never have to pay. >: Guess I'll start the download... :(

Cap'n Crunch Apr 13th, 2003 07:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mockery
Mortal Kombat was horrible. Absolutely horrible. I couldn't even sit through either of those movies. The games were good but the movie made me want to destroy the games, so I definitely don't think they win for best translation. Worst acting and effects, perhaps.

As for ranting, that's part of what the site's for. :blah

I saw it before, it did suck. I turned it off halfway through it. I'm glad Johnny Cage died in the beginning, I really did. Johnny Cage was no stud, as they depicted to be.


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:11 AM.

Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.