Online chess players?
 

Alright, I don't know if this qualifies as "gaming" in the video game sense, but are there any chess geeks like me on the board? Anybody who might be interested in playing, just PM me, or reply here, whatever.

I used to play chess quite a bit but have since lost most of my strategy, I wouldn't mind getting beaten sometime though.

In high school I made a chess board in shop class, it's pretty awesome. Made of oak and walnut. I have it sitting on my shelf, if only it didn't have these lame pieces. I don't have the discipline to work on making pieces.

Re: Online chess players?
 

Go to yahoo for that crap poindexter :/

Yeah, thanks, I do that already. Now shush!

i used to play but i am a fucking noob again ><

I like chess. I like collecting interesting pieces, boards etc, and I have a fantastic hand crafted Lewis chess set that I never touch.

I am shit at chess, though.

While I can handle losing to a child at Starcraft 2, I cannot handle losing to anyone at chess, since it's basically THE strategy game that separates the wheat from the chaff.

I might play tonight. I used to use yahoo chess a lot. I'm not a speed player by any means though.

i used to play chess a bit but now i think its kind of dumb cause everyone always uses the same strategy. MOVE MIDDLE PAWNS TwO STEPS FORWARD

I beat the last boss in chess and retired

why the hell this thread did get bumped

We were gonna do chess bumps.

:lol

That was fucking awesome. :lol

Anyways, you have like 3 days to move your piece. Pub is making some aggressive moves. I bet he's not as shy about rape as he acts.

CHALLENGE ISSUED.

I love cheese

Well played 10K, I gave you a fishy move tropy. Pub got the Queen trophy of course.

http://www.chess.com/echess/profile/CaptainFlameGore

I am already in the beginning with Tadao! But I want take all of you on! No damn kung-fu movie shit here!!

Lol. Thank you tadao. They have a bunch of ridiculous ass trophies on there.

I gave Pub the SHAKESPEARE trophy

lol I started a game with Gus WAY before he got games going with Pub and Tadao and OH GUESS WHERE HIS PRIORITIES LIE >:

Gus you're going to get the crappiest trophy I can find when we finish this game in 2014

lol nice zugs

well SOME PEOPLE got back to me real quick whenever I wasn't distracted by NewsRadio

Also when I finished up for the day with Pub he was like "Last one of the day, it's 3am".

It was only 11pm my time, which means he's only four time zones away from America's east coast.

Pram, I'd start sweating if I were you. He's getting closer :eek

I am debating whether I should learn chess for the 5th time.

All I ever played with my set was military marches and royal balls.

Hell, I'd never played before; didn't think it would be as fun as it is

I'll take you on grislygoop.

http://www.chess.com/members/view/Colonel_Flagg

I'll be a sacrificial goat. :)

http://www.chess.com/echess/profile/zbf

BRING IT.

FUCK YOU CHESS I'M EXHAUSTED AND THE SUN'S COMING UP :(

WE ARE ALL SO BAD THAT WE'RE RUNNING AROUND THE BOARD IN CIRCLES

GOD DOESN'T EXIST

I ENJOYED OUR LAST GAME NO MATTER HOW PAINFUL IT WAS!!!

and the fuckin birds are out.

Is anyone else watching other people's games? Here's some EXCLUSIVE COMMENTARY from my and milhouse's game to give you a glimpse into the strategic minds of two of I-Mockery's premiere champions.

I WILL FIND THE COMPUTER CHESS OVERLORD HIVE MIND AND MURDER IT WITH FIRE

Also turns out it was not just SHyandquetguy's turn, he had already checkmated me :lol

milhouse beat me last night too. He pulled some anexation of puerto rico shit and flipped the script.

I feel this is out of my league.

If there is an online version of paper scissors rock that we can get into or boggle or something, I'd do that.

I play Go! You should learn that, Zhukov.

Pub has performed a reach around and he is just sitting there with his cock in my fucking ass waiting til I can't take this shit no more! >:

http://www.chess.com/members/view/GenuineSaucy

Come at me bros

Shyandquietguy kicked the shit out of me >:

http://www.chess.com/echess/analysis.html?id=45657696

I want you to know I spent that entire game wringing my hands and scowling while all of my Sburban Jungle remixes were on loop. SHIT WAS INTENSE.

Technically it was a draw but I still kicked your ass for sure!!

I believe this may be my third I-mock taken down!

Two have taken me down, Esouhlim and Pub Lover!

Ach! You people treat your pawns like fat children you tease but later regret!

Their entrapment in pulled post holes is their doing! No matter how unkempt the grass is!

the point of pawns is to make a line the enemy can't cross without getting killed by a pawn/something else :O

CHESS ADVICE FROM DR. KAHLJORN

i used to have a lego chess game but i missplaced the cd

Guitar Woman mashed my god damn face in.

LET ME SEE YOU TRY TO DO THAT SHIT AGAIN!!

PS: ENJOY YOUR SHITTY STRAW BROOM TROPHY!!! NYLON'S FOR CHAMPS BTW!!!

I think I've added everyone :eek

I can't believe I'm saying this but WHERE THE HELL IS ZBF?

Who am I kidding - I don't know wtf I'm doing.

I accepted ZBF and ELX but they have yet to start. :tear

Sorry guys :lol last few days have been crazy IRL, I'll be quicker about getting murdered by you guys in the coming week

getting murdered is no fucking excuse. I do ghost moves alllllllllll the tiiiiiiiiime. Also yay booooooseeeeee

I've been MIA because I died of chess overdose that night :(

Pub, our game's getting fucking intense. We're being too conservative. :lol

I think when I forfeited to Pub I lost like 200 points. :(

There aren't many moves left to make where one of us won't lose a piece. And he already gave up a knight.

That's when sacrifices must be made!

THAT GAME WAS FOR THE BIRDS.

Playing Flagg stresses me out. After every one of his moves I get about 10 different choices to make and they're all bad :(

I'm going to use my 1 free computer analysis a week on him. :(

THATS CHEATING! >:

Playing MIlhouse, Tadao, ShyGuy and Pub at the same time is playing havoc with my concentration, never mind actual work. :(

Tadao got me looking the wrong way and now I'm in real trouble. :( Never again on the mobile.

:lol You can only use it after the game is over.

Pub is totally wrecking me right now.

Boy that lasted long - nearly 6 hours. :\

Nice game, Tadao. :) You too, Pub. :):)

I'm gonna learn a lot from playing you guys. I make soooo many stupid moves. :(

Also, I think when I make a challenge, I'm gonna set it to 1 day to move.

Wow, I ran the analysis on my game with Flagg and it totally breaks down what you did wrong and what your opponent did wrong as well. It also gives you good alternatives.

Now you know most of my play is pure dumb luck.

Flagg broke out the pro opening on me. I need to go over my opening techniques again.

^^^ What? ;)

Milhouse is giving me what for, SnQ is giving me an aggressive game, miss e just started playing and I have a followup challenge from Tadao, in addition to our current game, Bill. Plus, ZBF has gone missing. (this last is fortunate, otherwise I'd have to keep track of 5 games at once) This is the last time I have so many games going on at once.

Tadao, you'll get a rematch when I finish a few games. Promise. :tired

Strike First! Strike Hard! Show no mercy!!

I was experimenting on Pub and thought I had made a big mistake! Then out of know where I literally see the most glorious check mate possible and take it!! My luck is going good guys! Get cautious!!

Seriously, check my game with him. The chess badass contest begins NOW! Whoever can intentionally round someone up into such a thing from the get go fucking wins

:lol I keep 11 going. That's one of the reasons I'm so horrible at chess. ;)

I think I'm just about screwed here against Flagg, but at least I made it a struggle >:)

I just accidentally checkmated Esu :lol

lol

That's how I always play against Shyandquietguy :(

Anyone got any ideas on how to checkmate my little bother?

http://www.chess.com/echess/game.html?id=45579929

I think I have to move my king forward. :( Run the game backwards 10 steps to see why. But then he can move his queen or any other piece for a step. I don't want him chasing me. :(

Hey guys, I say we boycott ZBF

Screw it, that's good enough for me. Challenge accepted! ;)

You want to resign? :D I think I'll end up with a King, queen and 2 bishops against your King in a few moves.

Agreed. >:

I'm not going out without a fight!

Good! :D

im assuming you're black.. move your queen right next to him lol but move your bishop to a spot it can protect it first. he can try to move to kill your bishop but itll take him two moves.

so basically, move black rook diagnoly up and right and then move your queen all the way next to the king

the only thing he can do is move his queen in front of your queen. oh wait i didnt see the other pawn :O
alternatively you can move your pawn two spaces forward, next move move it forward again, next move move your queen next to it but then you have to move your king first

ooor you can move your bishop all the way up to next to your pawn, your queen will protect it, then you can m ove your pawn forward without having to move your queen and also your bishop can protect your queen for another check mate :O :O:O

this last ones the best cause you have two options for a checkmate

I think I'll take a chance on that last one, it looks like a killer :O

On scoring at chess dot com. I believe they score you on every move you make, not just weather you win or lose. If you blunder, you get negative points, if you make strong moves you gain points.

I was trying to figure out how that worked.

I'm getting immensely bored with chess now. That's why I am the way I am, Pub.

If you castle queen side its like a dub step move.

I haven't gotten to that part of theories yet. Been watching http://www.chessvideos.tv/ and it has improved my game. I have a feeling we are all gonna become better harassers through all of this. We have Shyandquietguy to thank, he's the one who started all this.

Tadao has some shady deals going on in this game.

HAH! You totally took me out. I started not looking were I move again. :(

I didn't even see that until the last second though. I was going to move my king away and try and save face.

did you win with my checkmate :lol

dont forget if he sacrifices his queen you can still use your pawn :O

although i dont remember how it looked but he might've been able to kill your bishop with his horsey, but it still would've taken 2+ turns

Yeah, he played a very different move and changed the game completely. Fucker. >:

http://www.chess.com/echess/game.html?id=45579929

This shit is going nowhere.

:lol you lost your queen?

pretty sure you lost dude he has more pieces than you and you can't move your pawns very easily :(

i guess you can move your pawn all the way to the left two spaces forward and start working towards the other end of the board

yeah, he forced me to lose my queen. what a fag

I've killed off the queens so often that I've basically forgotten how to effectively use one in anything but the endgame.

I always get them out of the way if I have the option and am not in a position to box the enemy one up quickly.

I'm still playing the same game against Flagg since last Thursday. Checkmate's in only about two moves but he's been gone all day.

And 10kV Ghost is pretty damn good and I still don't know how I beat him the first time I played him.

I used to trade queens right away all the time, I can play without them.

I don't mind trading queens unless I plan on doing something with it soon or if I'm already down a few pieces. Sometimes it's nice not having to worry all the time if it's in trouble or not

Cuz you took my hasek.

i might make an account for this tomorrow since i dont have shit to do between 1245 and 530

except sleep in the library. other than that i guess i could study or pick up on chicks, but i dont really do either of those :lol
I GUESS I COULD START THOUGH.