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-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Chojin Jul 3rd, 2011 11:15 PM

making me have to erase about 30 entries is srs brs, especially when i can't delete rep in batch

executioneer Jul 3rd, 2011 11:38 PM

what hell is point of rep system if not to abuse it

kahljorn Jul 4th, 2011 12:27 AM

the weird thing was that she was a doctor ;/

Wiffles Jul 4th, 2011 12:29 AM

I am now contemplating suicide from the loss of my pickles....

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 12:29 AM

A TERRIBLE DOCTOR.

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 12:53 AM

i am a doctor of terrible

Dixie Jul 4th, 2011 01:00 AM

so, any of you ******* want a google+ invite?
PM me a gmail address.

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 01:02 AM

NOPE.

Dixie Jul 4th, 2011 01:04 AM

I wasn't asking you Sam, i have other ways of getting in touch with you...unless you changed your phone number.

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 01:06 AM

I'll likely join it later when it's out of beta or whatever. Just like Gmail and Google Chrome.

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 01:07 AM

DIX, YOU CAN ALWAYS JUST REACH OUT AND GET IN TOUCH WITH ME.

IN THE VAN.

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 01:09 AM

shag carpet in the back?

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 01:09 AM

NO, JUST PASSED OUT BROADS.

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 01:13 AM

mah boy

Dixie Jul 4th, 2011 01:13 AM

that van is not a safe place for living creatures.
it needs lysol and pillows.

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 01:16 AM

Your Red Ranger costume is still back there.

I'll never forget the time you activated my Megazord sequence.

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 01:22 AM

hey baby, let's you and me combine to form a megazord

Grislygus Jul 4th, 2011 02:27 AM

what the hell is a google+

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 02:28 AM

It's notFacebook.

Esuohlim Jul 4th, 2011 02:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 729521)
what hell is point of rep system if not to abuse it

hook my nigga up with some zugs for this

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 02:35 AM

SOME CHICKEN MCZUGGETS

Chojin Jul 4th, 2011 03:43 AM

willie, you may notice that doing that gave wiffles more rep points than me. choose your battles more wisely.

Zhukov Jul 4th, 2011 04:20 AM

I'm not sure which way I want to swing with the green or the red yet. Having a long line of red mockerzugs could make people fear me.

LordSappington Jul 4th, 2011 04:26 AM

Possible tatto?

Zhukov Jul 4th, 2011 05:40 AM

No, don't.

Chojin Jul 4th, 2011 06:50 AM

if you're some kind of fag

i bet it'd look really sharp paired with one of those NES t-shirts from hot topic

Grislygus Jul 4th, 2011 06:54 AM

wtf, you can see who gave you pickles in the user cp? I think I should start paying attention to things


Jesus christ 10k's pickle message made me laugh so goddamned hard

Chojin Jul 4th, 2011 07:04 AM

it is the best way to give posters private reach-arounds. especially mods. ;)

Grislygus Jul 4th, 2011 07:14 AM

I'm already a mod cultist. As previously discussed, I am High Priest in service to The Bearded One Lying In Wait In The City of R'Lyeh, whose sign is the Great Mac Truck. Signs of His Baleful Glory can be used in defense of curses invoking Tadao, the trickster figure in I-Mockery cosmology, whose sign is the Fucking Rabbit. Also direct contact with the Bearded One leads to madness and death, but the Esoteric Order offers premium insurance rates to members

Grislygus Jul 4th, 2011 07:24 AM

High ranking members are also blessed with the real-life equivalent of Need For Speed II's "Road Rage" cheat, and Venom's The Chanting of the Priests sounds out through the heavens whenever they drive on a freeway

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 07:49 AM

grizzlygums - a god among mens

Kitsa Jul 4th, 2011 11:28 AM

So I've just returned from a family gathering at which a cousin-by-marriage was wandering around wasted/stoned, chatting up the old ladies and asking someone's 90 year old mother if she partied.

Zhukov Jul 4th, 2011 11:40 AM

And did she?

elx Jul 4th, 2011 11:40 AM

Kitsa is the only person here who should be allowed to use the pickle system :(

Kitsa Jul 4th, 2011 11:50 AM

She said "not anymore". Her thick accent made it funnier.

Kitsa Jul 4th, 2011 01:55 PM

This was my vantage point for the party, after I finished swimming:


And I found this funny for some reason:


Ex Leper Jul 4th, 2011 04:16 PM

Just got a 45" record of "Nightmare on My Street" for $3.50

Otto Jul 4th, 2011 04:50 PM

Went through my storage building today to find my manual typewriter, only to see it had been crushed by a collapsed ceiling beam. The only halfway decent antique shops are either grossly overpriced or are never open when I have a day off, the local craigslist listings only yield broken ones or selectrics, and I can't get a Saturday off to get to the flea-market. I hate that I can never find something when I'm seeking it out.

kahljorn Jul 4th, 2011 06:54 PM

you should sue

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 06:55 PM

FUCK THEM IN THE COURT OF LAW.

kahljorn Jul 4th, 2011 06:57 PM

USE THE CEILING BEAM TO CRUSH THEIR ANUS

IN A COURT OF LAW

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 06:58 PM

STICK YOUR CEILING BEAM IN THEIR COURT OF LAW.

Kitsa Jul 4th, 2011 07:04 PM

ANUS

TYPEWRITER

OWAIT THIS HAS BEEN DONE BEFORE

CAPS

Pentegarn Jul 4th, 2011 07:07 PM

THE CAPS LOCK GOT BROKEN BY A CEILING BEAM

Sam Jul 4th, 2011 07:09 PM

I LOST MY CAPS LOCK IN A COURT OF LAW.

kahljorn Jul 4th, 2011 07:35 PM

THIS IS A CASE WHICH DEMANDS CAPSITAL PUNISHMENT

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 07:42 PM

IT WAS A MURDER

OF GOOD SENSE

Otto Jul 4th, 2011 07:51 PM

Oh man, that was great.

Since it's not a rented storage building, but rather a converted big-rig trailer in the backyard of my Grandfather's old house, so the only person I can really be angry at is myself. Well the only rational reaction is to be angry at myself but I'm just going to blame my dead grandfather. FUCK YOU OLD MAN :fu

Fathom Zero Jul 4th, 2011 10:47 PM

severed heads make no sense when they speak, don't they? I WOULDN'T KNOW - MINE'S STILL ATTACHED.

10,000 Volt Ghost Jul 4th, 2011 11:51 PM

YOU NEED TO PUT THE MOVING OF YOUR TYPEWRITER INTO THEIR ANUS IN THE COURT OF LAW.

Pentegarn Jul 5th, 2011 12:16 AM

DROP THE CAPS LOCK IN THE ANAL CRACK OF THE JUSTICE SYSTEM

Then go antiquing.

Dixie Jul 5th, 2011 12:21 AM

there is no cheese
:(

Shyandquietguy Jul 5th, 2011 02:30 AM

Okay, knowing all well and good as to how socially absent I am, I sent Pub this trophy after I beat him on a chess game

Good Sportsmanship trophy
Thank you for your good sportsmanship and honest play during the game.

"I am the most emotionless person I know. I'm holding up only the Good Sportsmanship trophy as term for endearment. I must go and kill my wife now."

This was what he gave me.

Brilliant Tactical Play
That was a nice display of tactical play! Good game.

"I am no match for you."

I can't stop looking at this.

Esuohlim Jul 5th, 2011 01:22 PM

Thinking of good shit to say when giving out those trophies is stressful, man

10,000 Volt Ghost Jul 5th, 2011 02:07 PM

I have to let mine pile up. Playing on a cell phone is stressfull enough let alone trying to type and click on stuff using flash.

Colonel Flagg Jul 5th, 2011 02:40 PM

So, you're wiping the floor with my pawns on a cell phone?

Excuse me while I nip off and shoot myself. :suicide

10,000 Volt Ghost Jul 5th, 2011 03:39 PM

Most of the time, unless I'm at home after work. I think Shy and Quiet Guy is about to beat me.

Kitsa Jul 5th, 2011 06:14 PM

Who wants to hear something gross?

I was going to make frozen sweet potato fries tonight. Out of the bag, wrapped around a fry, was what appeared to be a long, black pubic hair.

I can tell you with absolute certainty that this did not come off of me.

I called their customer service line after I got finished dry-heaving, and they don't open until tomorrow. :(

Otto Jul 5th, 2011 06:44 PM

The girl from "teeth" was in charge of taste-testing that batch.

Guitar Woman Jul 5th, 2011 10:35 PM

Holy fucking shit I hate the male lead on Law and Order SVU. I want to kick the fuck out of that guy.

Smug piece of shit.

Esuohlim Jul 5th, 2011 10:48 PM

YOU MUST SPREAD SOME REPUTATION AROUND BEFORE GIVING IT TO SAM AGAIN

Sam Jul 5th, 2011 11:09 PM

SUCH BULLSHIT.

Otto Jul 5th, 2011 11:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 729988)
Holy fucking shit I hate the male lead on Law and Order SVU. I want to kick the fuck out of that guy.

Smug piece of shit.

Are you talking about Christopher Meloni? Because it's really hard to take him seriously when you realize that he played a gay hotel attendant in Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas. I don't see Detective Stabler, only Sven the constantly verbally abused desk clerk at the Flamingo Hotel.

10,000 Volt Ghost Jul 6th, 2011 12:14 AM

Meloni is a pimp.



Also, H Jon Benjamin has a can.

elx Jul 6th, 2011 01:26 AM

Hey! Neptune's first earth birthday is coming up - could you guys please remind everyone so we, as a world, don't forget to celebrate?!

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 01:32 AM

Neptune can suck it.

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 01:40 AM

when a girl asks me how old i am and I'm pretty sure she's younger than me am I supposed to lie / under exaggerate so i can get laid

cause i totally didn't :O haha im dumb. Oh well she's tiny looking my penis would probably rip her in half

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 01:46 AM

JUST TELL HER THAT YOU ARE OLD ENOUGH.

TO PARTY.

INSIDE OF HER.

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 01:49 AM

:lol

i dunno why i was all honest and shit. wtf is wrong with me

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 01:52 AM

i dont care enough about vagina

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 01:57 AM

I don't know, at the last party I went to a couple of girls were visibly disappointed when they found out I was younger than twenty five, they couldn't have been older than twenty two

which is MY AGE. wtf



Whenever an illustrator is hired to draw medical drawings for female anatomy books, they just draw an antique-looking map and write "Here Be Unpredictables" on the vast blank spaces

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:02 AM

Now wait so what, I just noticed. Pram Maven was sacrificed, so people suddenly started posting here again?

I-Mockery is like the house from Burnt Offerings :lol

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 02:02 AM

hm well they were prolly money sluts :lol

she did say i was young looking and thats all that matters! maybe i didn't screw up :O

i got a study date tomorrow kinda. Not a real date but shes been talking to me a lot so i kind of figure thats what it is :O and shes bringing snacks!

i love snacks

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grislygus (Post 730039)
ONLY IF YOU SHOW PUB LOVER YOUR PENIS WHILE YOU DO IT

oh fuck, we should have tried to convince him to do that one :eek missed opportunity, guys

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 02:04 AM

I'm sure publ over already took care of that :O

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:05 AM

You don't really need a 'real date' to get laid, so SHAKE DAT MONEYMAKER

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:08 AM

She'll be all "So next question: what's the statute of limitations on this crime" and you'll be all like "There's a statute of limitations on my balls, baby" and then you'll wink and it'll be awkward while you both try to figure out what the fuck you meant by that, exactly










Hot

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 02:16 AM

AND THEN YOU STICK YOUR TONGUE IN HER ASS.

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:17 AM

KHAL, YOU WONDERFUL PETER PAN SLUT, YOU

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 02:18 AM

ill try guys but if she gets mad im telling her people on the internet told me to say it to get laid and eat her ass out

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 02:19 AM

YEAH, DO IT KAHL.

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 02:19 AM

DONT PUT ME IN THE SAME BOAT AS PETER PAN SLUT

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:21 AM

PETER PAN SLUT IS BOSS, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

GAVE ME THE BEST BLOWJOB I EVER GOT

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:22 AM

Except that he was an asian nude model at the time, not sure how he managed that

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 02:23 AM

WAIT, WHAT?

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 02:25 AM

IF I WAS TRYING TO BLOW COCKS MAYBE I WOULD BE HAPPY ABOUT BEING PETER PAN SLUT

BUT IM TRYING TO LICK ASS AND EAT CHIPS

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:25 AM

BLEW YOUR FUCKING MIND THERE, DIDN'T I




Already posted about it once after great inner deliberation, nobody noticed :lol:lol:lol

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 02:26 AM

GREASYGUS, PLEASE TELL ME THIS STORY. :(

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:27 AM

hahahahahahaha, oh man, I think I still have some drawings of him somewhere

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:28 AM

hang on, seriously. lemme check the portfolio pile

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:37 AM

Dude wtf, he's not here. I am seriously way more distressed than I should be. I went through the entire pile

I'm going to tear this whole fucking house apart, I don't care what time it is>:

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:44 AM

Oh my god, ha ha I found them

they're a lot crappier than I remember

I WAS NINETEEN, NOT MY FUCKING FAULT

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 02:58 AM

NSFW

Spoilers!

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 02:59 AM

Why is his dick coming out of an asshole?

Sam Jul 6th, 2011 03:00 AM

MAYBE IT'S JUST ME.

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 03:02 AM

THAT WOULD ACTUALLY jUST BE ME SUCKING AT DRAWING AT THE TIME

ONCE AGAIN, NINETEEN

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 03:02 AM

I ACTUALLY DON'T KNOW HOW HE PUT UP WITH BULLSHIT LIKE THAT:lol

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 03:04 AM

THIS WAS RIGHT AROUND WHEN I WAS DRAWING 'DOOGAN'




I THINK

kahljorn Jul 6th, 2011 03:17 AM

hha that guys penis is small

Grislygus Jul 6th, 2011 03:19 AM

Didn't really matter to me, not what I was interested in. Besides, he was a sweetheart :(:(:(

And I was kind of a piece of shit, now that I think about it





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