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-   -   GENERAL ZOD INVADES THE WWE (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14120)

James Sep 27th, 2004 11:04 PM

GENERAL ZOD INVADES THE WWE
 
Just now, the main event being Randy Orton versus Batista. Out come Triple H to sway the balance against Orton. Then out come Ric "Nature Boy" Flair to complete the group of Evolution to gang up on Orton.

And that's when I see it.

In the crowd, a man holds a sign. It is white with simple black writing done in marker.

"KNEEL BEFORE ZOD, FLAIR!"

He didn't kneel. He shall be punished.

Drev Sep 27th, 2004 11:50 PM

Yeah I saw that. :lol

But the real point is that Gene Snisky is the best thing to happen to WWE since Hulk Hogan. You heard me.

MLE Sep 29th, 2004 05:23 PM

i saw that too :<

snitsky can't act :/

Anonymous Sep 29th, 2004 05:37 PM

He doesn't need too, cause he's ALL MAN.

I don't understand how lita's baby dying makes Kane face. He forced her to marry him against her will, then says in the interview "Despite our differences, we at least shared the baby. Now, we don't share anything anymore." BIG FUCKING SURPRISE. MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE RAPED HER BUT NOW BECAUSE SNITSKY GAVE HER THE BABY PULVERIZER, YOU ARE MY RAPE HERO. :eek

Wrestling is ridiculously retarded, and that's why I love it. Let's run down the great plot developments that surfaced on monday.

Vet women strip down new woman to embarrass her. New woman dances around in underwear.
CONFLICT: Jealousy, hazing
RESOLUTION: ?

Shelton wrestles HHH for the third time, HHH cheats, Shelton wins by DQ and gets beat up by Evolution. Benoit and Orton are apparently uninterested.
CONFLICT: ?
RESOLUTION: ?

Orton appeals to flair to not be HHH's lap dog. Later that night, Orton wrestles batista, gets beaten up by HHH, Flair shows up and in a SHOCKING SWERVE~! beats Orton up too.
CONFLICT: Orton's feud with HHH
RESOLUTION: -20

Hurricane and Rosey continue to be jobbers.
CONFLICT: Hurricane's crushed soul and Rosie's love of pork pockets.
RESOLUTION: They are guaranteed at least 3 seconds of well-deserved rest every monday night.

Snitsky defeats Val Venis after expressing that it wasn't his fault for killing Kane's baby. Kane is sad.
CONFLICT: Kane is sad.
RESOLUTION: Val Venis cries when he ejaculates.

In conclusion, it's clear to me that the future of Raw is Hurricane and Kane teaming up again, then joining with Val Venis to hold each other and cry.

James Sep 29th, 2004 05:42 PM

Kane wasn't a heel for raping Lita. Kane was a heel for feuding with Matt Hardy. Remember Katie Vick? He was a face then, too.

WHEN KANE RAPES WOMEN HE IS A FAN FAVORITE!

James Sep 29th, 2004 05:51 PM

JamesmanX: I think they should turn everyone face this way.
JamesmanX: Have them rape a woman, and then kill their fetus.
JamesmanX: It could lead to hilarious pair-ups. Like Sylvan Grenier and Jazz.
Popnko: he'd be talking about his great new french baby, then pop the cork off [a bottle of cognac] and it'd hit her in the stomach and she'd go 'UUH!'
Popnko: SACRE BLEU!
-
Popnko: then it'd be time for jazz to be a mannequin
JamesmanX: And then Triple H has sex with her dressed up as a throwback wrestler.
Popnko: it'd be like that literotica gangbang
Popnko: with vince and shane

PSYCHOMAN! Sep 30th, 2004 06:43 PM

Screw Raw, I'm only watching Smackdown from now on!

*remembers, Big Show, the tranq gun and hair clippers*

Ah, screw the WWE. I'm only watching TNA.

remembers Petey Williams' flipping piledriver*

Fantastic.
[/i]

Drev Sep 30th, 2004 07:26 PM

The thing about Hurricane...is he gonan go heel or what?

It was funny when he ripped the mask off the black kid. :(

bigtimecow Sep 30th, 2004 07:29 PM

i haven't watched wrestling in a while but slow down now


when did rape become part of wrestling? and/or children?

a who to the what now?

Drev Sep 30th, 2004 07:33 PM

actually Lita agreed to get fucked by Kane so he wouldn't obliterate Matt Hardy, so I don't think that counts as rape. :/

Snisky should have a finisher called the Wire Hanger. :(

executioneer Sep 30th, 2004 07:34 PM

god wrestling sounds idiotic

Captain Goodtimes Sep 30th, 2004 07:39 PM

Actually the idea of Ra and Zues going at it sounds pretty cool.

Ninjavenom Sep 30th, 2004 07:57 PM

Fuck Zeus, Ra is the god who annihilates all.

Captain Goodtimes Sep 30th, 2004 08:04 PM

What about Ganesh, a four armed elephant can really do some damage.

the[Hitman] Sep 30th, 2004 08:44 PM

Jesus fucking Christ wrestling is terrible.

James Sep 30th, 2004 08:52 PM

Yo fuck you man. Just because you're a faggot doesn't mean wrestling sucks. I mean Christ, that shit is great.

The story with Lita letting Kane knock her up was so great. It was so REAL. Probably the best story I've ever seen since the time they talked about Kane raping a girl's corpse.

I almost cried when the baby died, it was so sad. :( We've all been there, am I right folks?

So fuck you man, if you don't know what you're talking about. Go back to watching your ice skating.

Skitsky is a jerk for accidentally being the cause of killing the baby Kane forced upon Lita. WHAT HAPPENS TO THEIR LOVE NOW? He's such a dick.

Captain Goodtimes Sep 30th, 2004 08:52 PM

Good point, hitman, Jesus christ wouldn't be fit to fight ganesh, he's too scrawny.


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