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-   -   boys are dumb (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69700758)

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 10:36 AM

boys are dumb
 
i've now been single for 1 year. haven't been single for this long since i was about 17. every one of my douchebag exes is either married with kids or engaged or dating someone. why, WHY am i still single? where are the cute, nice guys who actually believe in relationships, not just one night stands??

rant over.

Grislygus Oct 6th, 2008 10:41 AM

They are all around you, at all times. However, they are repulsive and harbor a peculiar brand of severe, quiet, brooding misogyny because no woman (including you) will touch them (with good reason). Happy hunting!

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 10:47 AM

yeah, i'm starting to understand that. I can't even begin to go into my dating issues, but let's just say that i seem to attract guys that already have girlfriends. that doesn't help either. the other type i attract is the "marriage is for suckers, as a matter of fact so are girlfriends".

*sigh*

Grislygus Oct 6th, 2008 10:54 AM

I'd recommend lezzing out, but they don't seem all that enamored with the long-term, either. So you're screwed in a wholly metaphorical sense


Also, you're in New Jersey, for chrissakes, are you surprised

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 10:59 AM

lolol yeah i'm starting to find that all guys around here are the same -- from NJ or NYC -- so i'm thinking about moving to the middle of nowhere (for more reasons that just eligible men).

and i'd totally go for chicks, if i didn't like penis so much :(

Grislygus Oct 6th, 2008 11:03 AM

Middle of nowhere gets rednecks that hold the exact same opinions as those who you would flee in disgust

Quit complaining, snag a spineless motherfucker and whip the everloving bejesus out of him

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 11:07 AM

is it wrong that i like rednecks?

i think so.

Grislygus Oct 6th, 2008 11:15 AM

Are we talking actual rednecks here? As in, "I will lecture you for a full fifteen minutes on why 7-11 hot dogs are the best god damndest food on the planet, they gots chili and jalapeenos and sour cream and all the fixins on it"? Or are we talking a seventeenth century crappy romance novel fantasy involving the lost, weeping noblewoman and the gentle goat herder?

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 11:17 AM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA no gentle goat herders for me. I like actual rednecks. it's weird, maybe because all we have here are guidos and metrosexuals.

Esuohlim Oct 6th, 2008 01:28 PM

Fuck I wish I was dumb enough for the loveline forum

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 01:52 PM

i wish i didn't have reason to post here. but i do. i suck.

Pub Lover Oct 6th, 2008 02:03 PM

But do you swallow?

Sam Oct 6th, 2008 02:42 PM

I was about to say, you probably don't give enough head.

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 03:09 PM

oh i'm the girl that puts out. believe me. i think that's the problem is that i put out too soon.

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 03:09 PM

and apparently i forgot how to properly form a sentence too.

Sam Oct 6th, 2008 03:13 PM

I HOPE YOU PUT OUT BETTER THEN YOU FORM SENTENCES. :rolleyes

dirtyxblondexdame Oct 6th, 2008 03:25 PM

oh i do. i forget how to speak normally sometimes because i look at icanhascheezburger.com too much.

LordSappington Oct 6th, 2008 06:56 PM

Now wait a minute, because you have failed to get into a relationship for a year now, that makes the BOYS dumb? You gotta meet us halfway, you know.

Badgers ate my FaCe Oct 6th, 2008 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dirtyxblondexdame (Post 585215)
oh i'm the girl that puts out. believe me. i think that's the problem is that i put out too soon.

There's nothing wrong at all with "putting out". You're independent, single, probably decent looking, who says it's not ok? Just don't think every guy you sleep with is gonna love you, most of them are not and will make you feel like crap. USE them! Use them for their dick and move along. Don't be unsafe, but have fun. Don't be ashamed to have fun. Don't go around ANNOUNCING it, be discreet, but do what you feel is right. It sounds like you're a very active lady, you like to have a good time with good ol boys, and that's that. What's wrong with THAT?

By the way, what're you doing later tonight....? =)

Just kidding, but seriously, don't let what others think affect your personal pleasures. They're YOURS, not theirs. Just don't get attached to the dude, he just wants to get laid as much as you. You'' recognize the right guy when you run across him.

Hope this helps!

Tadao Oct 6th, 2008 08:37 PM

I think BAMF got his life in enough order to give out advice!

Good job! Your still married right?

Just joking, glad to see you back.

Pub Lover Oct 6th, 2008 08:38 PM

Dude, what if she is a paedophile, and you just told her to go molest kids? YOU'RE A MONSTOR FOR THAT ADVICE! OMG, I'MMA CALLING THE POLICE!

Badgers ate my FaCe Oct 6th, 2008 09:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 585394)
I think BAMF got his life in enough order to give out advice!

Good job! Your still married right?

Just joking, glad to see you back.

Ha! You remember that. Yes, I pulled it out. In the end, I just let it go and just kept on plugging through. With a few rough spots here and there, it seems to be over, but of course, the cycle will start again.

But yeah, I would totally say that if you're single, do what you want to. You only live once. Just don't molest kids or anything. Make sure that meat's aged about 18 years!!!! And ask for ID, fuck these smart kids today trying to trick people up. Get notarized copies of the birth certificates.

Then hump away!

Tadao Oct 6th, 2008 09:12 PM

There are states that you can hump 16 year olds I think.

Badgers ate my FaCe Oct 6th, 2008 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tadao (Post 585414)
There are states that you can hump 16 year olds I think.

As long as it's legal. If she wants to break herself a couple of wild young studs, more power to her. Just make sure it's legal, they'll come after her these days.

After that, break out the Hersey's syrup and whipped cream. Go wild. No one's keeping score.

Bejeebus Oct 6th, 2008 09:21 PM

BAMF's advice is the best I've heard in a long time. I'm 29 and I live in Utah for Bejeebus sake! If you are single and over 23 you are an outcast and a reject. There comes a point though when you realize that you are better off not being in a serious relationship. Basically because you can do whatever the Chuck you want when you want and have fun doing it. Just make sure you establish your boundaries up front, then they can never say you weren't being honest with them. Ohh, and get a dog...


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