I-Mockery Forum

I-Mockery Forum (http://i-mockery.com/forum/index.php)
-   General Blabber (http://i-mockery.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=7)
-   -   I-Mockery Chat (Lube up those lips) (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8799)

Tadao Aug 6th, 2010 04:26 PM

:pagebrak

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 6th, 2010 04:52 PM

HOW DARE YOU PAGE BRAK IN THIS THREAD

MattJack Aug 6th, 2010 09:23 PM


Kitsa Aug 6th, 2010 09:54 PM

You guys must never have taken any Dilaudid, although I come by all mine legitimately and involuntarily :(

Mine hit me when I was in x-ray and made the lead apron they draped over me turn into thousands of caterpillars.

Otto Aug 6th, 2010 10:00 PM

I quit taking my bi-polar meds for like a week and I kept thinking that the lizards in my yard were talking to me when I went out to smoke.

MarioRPG Aug 7th, 2010 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 694433)
You guys must never have taken any Dilaudid, although I come by all mine legitimately and involuntarily :(

That's unfortunate. That stuff is hella intense. The only people I've known to have it prescribed had bone marrow cancer.

RaNkeri Aug 7th, 2010 04:08 PM

:conspiracy

RaNkeri Aug 7th, 2010 05:01 PM

Man, they just killed a commie who was being played by Sledge Hammer :eek

Kitsa Aug 7th, 2010 05:54 PM

I just got back from a day of hiking, found a dollar on the trail and a cave spider as big as my hand. Now where's that nature thread?

Mario: I do come by it a lot for cancer stuff, but mainly they give it to me in the ER when there's some sort of fresh spinal fuckery like intractable spasms or my back going out to the point where I can't move.

Pub Lover Aug 8th, 2010 06:51 AM

Do I know who the fuck Tim Black is? >:

Pentegarn Aug 8th, 2010 06:56 AM

Me beyotch

Probably should have clarified when I sent that request

Pub Lover Aug 8th, 2010 07:11 AM

Yay, internet pals. :D

#datamining

Kitsa Aug 8th, 2010 07:35 AM

Word of advice: never drink a room-temperature starbucks doubleshot. It's thick and weird and gross.

I downed it anyway, though. Needed the caffeine to make my excedrin work better, due to hiking killing my feet.

kahljorn Aug 8th, 2010 07:15 PM

I don't know if i should be curious about Dilaudid or not :(

Kitsa Aug 8th, 2010 07:48 PM

It wasn't my goal. It's a strong opioid. It's more or less similar to morphine, I guess, except I don't hallucinate like that on morphine and I have less of the unpleasant physical sensation when it kicks in (like the adrenaline feeling of falling).

Every time they give me dilaudid, I experience it a little differently. The time before last time, the whole room shimmered like a mirage and I amused myself by making up new languages.

Babs Aug 8th, 2010 11:57 PM

I'm in a coma

kahljorn Aug 9th, 2010 04:11 AM

morphine makes me hate myself for all of my decisions in the last 5 hours, but maybe thats sort of like what you mean by the falling sensation

Zhukov Aug 9th, 2010 04:19 AM

You guys are all druggies. I've got a prescription for morphine because of migraines, but I don't take it at all.

kahljorn Aug 9th, 2010 04:26 AM

pussy

zhukov we have a lot more in common with our drug usage than you might think. I never take morphine to get rid of migraines either.

Zhukov Aug 9th, 2010 04:40 AM

Well there you go!

Kitsa Aug 9th, 2010 08:03 AM

I'm definitely no druggie. I hate narcotics and especially opiates...if they give me a choice, I turn them down, because I hate the adrenaline-sick feeling they give me and I don't like not being in control of myself. However, in long-term cancerland and especially when you have a problem with your spinal cord, they assume you want loads of pain meds, and I periodically get shot up with the stuff in hospital.

So I have experienced more than I wanted to that way, but had to deal with enough drug seekers when I was working in an ER to know I never wanted to be one.

I take excedrin and coffee for pain control, and what it doesn't cover I just deal with.

Tadao Aug 9th, 2010 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 694608)
morphine makes me hate myself for all of my decisions in the last 5 hours, but maybe thats sort of like what you mean by the falling sensation

Wow, that's what pot does to me. It's a real downer.

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 9th, 2010 01:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Babs (Post 694595)
I'm in a coma

You should not be in a coma. It is still summer.

Kitsa Aug 9th, 2010 01:57 PM

Found this luna moth with a broken wing and brought it home. Can't do anything for it, since adult lunas don't feed and moth-medicine is not advanced enough to mend the wing, but at least I can ensure it doesn't meet a gory death at the hands of the neighborhood terrier (or any number of other predators).




Babs Aug 9th, 2010 02:48 PM

I've been in a drug coma for the past week. No more bad acid and 2CB, I just want to be a model a citizen.

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 9th, 2010 03:42 PM

I don't know what 2CB is because I am a model citizen.

kahljorn Aug 9th, 2010 07:24 PM

oh i think that's a tryptomene i remember people making a big deal out of it for a while cause it was legal.

Quote:

Wow, that's what pot does to me. It's a real downer
:O :O that sucks :( i can't imagine living without pot.

Fathom Zero Aug 9th, 2010 07:38 PM

I remember my friends losing their shit over these legal drugs, salvia and the like. Idiots.

kahljorn Aug 9th, 2010 08:27 PM

:lol
i still go places and see salvia marketed as a pot replacement :( anybody who smokes salvia expecting weed-like effects is tOTALLY FUCKED.

Fathom Zero Aug 9th, 2010 09:31 PM



:rock

executioneer Aug 9th, 2010 09:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 694650)
I don't know what 2CB is because I am a model citizen.

according to website dot com ( http://www.drugtext.org/sub/2cb.htm ) it's sort of like ecstacy only instead of killing boners it adds extra boners

Kitsa Aug 9th, 2010 09:38 PM

Poor Serge Gainsbourg.

I saw Jane Birkin in concert a few years ago and it was wonderful. Except, those of us who actually knew who she was (me, who got a museum membership just to qualify for early order tickets to get the best seat possible the moment they became available, and some French foreign-exchange students behind me) were seated well behind about 20 rows of people who had just shown up because she was part of the museum concert series and had no clue about her or Gainsbourg.

You should have heard the collective moan of misery and horror when a woman turned to her companion and said, "Now, who is this again? What does she do?"

Fathom Zero Aug 9th, 2010 09:50 PM

Jesus. >:

Kitsa Aug 9th, 2010 09:54 PM

It was a great evening nonetheless, although she was only doing songs off Arabesque and I would have given anything to hear an impromptu Di Doo Dah. I would have even accepted it with the North African instrumentation.

Fathom Zero Aug 10th, 2010 05:38 AM

http://www.kegworks.com/product.php?productid=174611

So you can get a case of 24 for $30. Not bad, really.

executioneer Aug 10th, 2010 09:15 AM

plus ~$20 shipping (or that's what it gave ME anyways)

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 10th, 2010 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by executioneer (Post 694669)
according to website dot com ( http://www.drugtext.org/sub/2cb.htm ) it's sort of like ecstacy only instead of killing boners it adds extra boners


:lol I can't even imagine.

Babs Aug 10th, 2010 02:28 PM

It's just like mescaline.

Kitsa Aug 10th, 2010 03:19 PM

excuse my naivete showing here, but with all this drugging how does anyone ever pass drug tests for work?

Dimnos Aug 10th, 2010 03:29 PM

You get a job that doesnt test. Or you quit just long enough to pass one then jump off the wagon again.

The Leader Aug 10th, 2010 06:06 PM

Or you don't get a job and just steal money out of your dad's wallet.

kahljorn Aug 10th, 2010 06:55 PM

2cb probably doesn't show up on drug screens :O

meth/pills almost never show up on drug screens unless you do them like the day before you take a drug test :O but it depends on what kind of drug test; if its a really sensitive one then it might take like a week for meth/opiates to get out of your system.. Really the only drug you can get busted on is weed.

Babs Aug 10th, 2010 06:56 PM

You don't even have a dad.

MLE Aug 10th, 2010 06:57 PM

I choose to believe Babs said that to kahl.

kahljorn Aug 10th, 2010 07:06 PM

FUCK BOTH OF YOU

:tear

kahljorn Aug 11th, 2010 10:04 PM

I DO TOO HAVE A FATHER YOU BASTARDS

also I am now a proud user of legal cannabis :O :O :O

executioneer Aug 11th, 2010 10:10 PM

legal by some definitions of the term. it's still illegal according to the feds :(

kahljorn Aug 11th, 2010 10:23 PM

yea, true enough :(

at least the feds wouldn't bother arresting someone for having an eighth.

also i got a free gram cause i was a new customer :O

Dimnos Aug 12th, 2010 10:03 AM

Is it super better than the shit you used to buy?

Babs Aug 12th, 2010 04:39 PM

Pictures now Kahl, I shouldn't even have to ask :rolleyes

Kitsa Aug 12th, 2010 05:09 PM

:pagebrak


"Cathy" is ending? But...but...where else won't I get my fill of inconsequential nonsense about chocolate, shoes and purses?

http://artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com/20...-end/?src=tptw

Dimnos Aug 12th, 2010 05:12 PM

That shit has been running all this time?

Esuohlim Aug 12th, 2010 05:13 PM

Cathy is ending?! ACK

kahljorn Aug 12th, 2010 05:43 PM

Quote:

Is it super better than the shit you used to buy?
Actually, no. But the dude i used to get it from had the best shit :(

to be honest i think the real difference is that the shit we got .. well... like with medicinal cannabis they like sort it into "effects" or whatever, so there's like weed for day time which keeps you peppy and weed for night time which knocks you the fuck out.
i like the kind that knocks you the fuck out and we bought the kind thats peppy :O its still really good shit though.

also my camera got stolen by a drag queen :(

Babs Aug 12th, 2010 07:14 PM

I just ate at Golden Corral for the first time. It fucking sucked.

Kitsa Aug 12th, 2010 08:26 PM

I could have told you that. It's called "Corral" for a reason....the cheap all you can eats. Mooooooooooooooooo.

Pentegarn Aug 12th, 2010 08:52 PM

My bowling league changed their banquet location from decent Italian joint to Golden Corral.

I have not gone to a post league banquet since

Esuohlim Aug 12th, 2010 09:07 PM

ACK

Chojin Aug 12th, 2010 10:27 PM

golden corral is a guilty pleasure of mine

they pretty much have banana and bread pudding on tap

Fathom Zero Aug 12th, 2010 10:44 PM

I'm gonna vomit if I even see bread pudding again. Bad experiences ruin food. :(

Kitsa Aug 12th, 2010 10:55 PM

I'm surprised you eat bread pudding :/

Tonight (:foodthread) I made Spanish rice, but with quinoa, and I tried to jack up the healthy wherever I can. There are a lot of good things about quinoa...it cooks in half the time of rice, it supposedly has an insane amount of protein and something like 8x the fiber of brown rice, etc. But there are bad things too...it's expensive as all hell, you either have to buy prerinsed or rinse it yourself to get the bitter coating off, and it does have a slightly un-ricelike scent to it.

I made the quinoa (1 cup dry yields 4 cups cooked, good deal), dumped in some tomatoes, found a small can of chickpeas and dumped those in too for texture, added some garlic and kosher salt and then thought for a minute and dumped in a shitload of hot sauce. The hot sauce masked the quinoa smell and it pretty much tasted like standard Spanish rice. I'd eat it again.

Chojin Aug 12th, 2010 11:09 PM

i don't eat bread pudding when i'm on a diet. i demolish that shit when i'm not.

Colonel Flagg Aug 13th, 2010 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 694996)
golden corral is a guilty pleasure of mine

they pretty much have banana and bread pudding on tap

Strap on the feedbag!

Colonel Flagg Aug 13th, 2010 01:00 PM

I went back to read Max's piece on the "13 Stages of Eating at the Golden Corral". I can barely see my computer screen through the tears. :lol

I miss the insane ramblings of Mr. Burbank. :(

Otto Aug 13th, 2010 03:59 PM

I used to eat at Golden Corral a lot, until I saw this disgustingly fat guy with a cauliflower nose and confederate flag suspenders eating a pile steak with his hands. Now every time I think of Golden Corral all I can see is redneck mcgrossnose gobbling down steak.

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 13th, 2010 04:20 PM

He was eating a pile steak? How big is that?

Otto Aug 13th, 2010 05:13 PM

Shit, I meant a pile of steak.

Kitsa Aug 13th, 2010 08:02 PM

I hate buffets.

Shit, this mike's harder lemonade stuff is crazy. I recommend it.

kahljorn Aug 13th, 2010 09:55 PM

fried brown rice :(

i got suckered into going to a stupid buffet the other day that has "WORLD FAMOUS FRIED CHICKEN" and it wasn't even that famous. also all the food sucked and they didn't even have soft serve ice cream :(

Colonel Flagg Aug 13th, 2010 10:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Otto (Post 695092)
I used to eat at Golden Corral a lot, until I saw this disgustingly fat guy with a cauliflower nose and confederate flag suspenders eating a pile [of] steak with his hands. Now every time I think of Golden Corral all I can see is redneck mcgrossnose gobbling down steak.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kahljorn (Post 695111)
i got suckered into going to a stupid buffet the other day that has "WORLD FAMOUS FRIED CHICKEN" and it wasn't even that famous. also all the food sucked and they didn't even have soft serve ice cream :(

I now have the mental image of Redneck McGrossnose with his head positioned upside-down dumping soft-serve ice cream directly down his gullet. :x

Just thought I'd share that.

Chojin Aug 14th, 2010 12:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 695102)
I hate buffets.

Shit, this mike's harder lemonade stuff is crazy. I recommend it.

i don't often drink anymore after i learned that alcohol has only slightly less calories than liquid lard

so now when i do drink, i only do shots and i don't go under 90 proof

Zhukov Aug 14th, 2010 05:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 694951)
Cathy is ending?! ACK

Well I laughed at this even if nobody else did.

Kitsa Aug 14th, 2010 05:37 AM

I laughed, but milhouse doesn't want me laughing at his jokes.

Colonel Flagg Aug 14th, 2010 07:11 AM

That comic never makes me laugh, so why should a joke based on the comic?

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 14th, 2010 09:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Otto (Post 695099)
Shit, I meant a pile of steak.

:( A pile steak sounded delicious.

10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 14th, 2010 10:25 AM

:pagebrak


Quote:

Originally Posted by Pentegarn (Post 694982)
My bowling league changed their banquet location from decent Italian joint to Golden Corral.

I have not gone to a post league banquet since

THEY DON'T HAVE COORS AT THE GOLDEN CORRAL.

Chojin Aug 14th, 2010 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov (Post 695132)
Well I laughed at this even if nobody else did.

i did too, but it was more of a smile than a giggling fit so i figured i wouldn't share

Fathom Zero Aug 14th, 2010 11:13 AM


Pentegarn Aug 14th, 2010 11:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost (Post 695147)
THEY DON'T HAVE COORS AT THE GOLDEN CORRAL.

Yet another reason to never go

Zhukov Aug 14th, 2010 11:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 695151)
i did too, but it was more of a smile than a giggling fit so i figured i wouldn't share

Yeah, well, I didn't spit my drink at the screen, but I figured it was witty enough that someone should have at least said "haha, that's reasonably witty".

The LOL emoticon gets thrown around this place for a lot less I tell you what.

Fathom Zero Aug 14th, 2010 11:31 AM

I BOUGHT SOME KNIVES.

Chojin Aug 14th, 2010 12:41 PM

i had an appointment today to learn how to use the electronic system the YMCA has for its weight room. despite me telling the 60 year old dude there that I was only there to swim today and i just wanted to get registered with the computer and acquainted with the system, he keeps insisting that i go through their circuit.

so i figure what the fuck, i'll at least see what this is like on the off-chance i break my spine and hip in 9 places and need to use some machines.

there's a little LED screen that you have to crane your neck about 60 degrees to the side to see. you can't ever break eye contact with it because it lights up as you go through your range of motion and honks disapprovingly at you if you spend _less_ than 2 seconds moving in either direction. should you complete a full set of 12 reps, it then assumes you are done and don't need to do another. the old man helpfully explained to me then that broscience has proven that performing more than 1 set of a lift is completely unnecessary because you recruit the same muscle fibers each time if you wait between sets; but if you wait for only 15 seconds, you use a completely different set of new magic muscle fibers that will help you lift bigger next time. the more you know!

we're done after a 6-machine circuit. he reassures me that today it might seem like we spent a lot of time in there (25 minutes tops), but now that i know how to use the machines, I can be in and out of there in 15 minutes.

then at the end of this all, i mention to him that there's not enough room in the freeweights section to do olympic lifts or even deads. he recommends i use the squat rack for that.

i guess this is all funnier if you know anything about weightlifting.

Esuohlim Aug 14th, 2010 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 695156)
I BOUGHT SOME

:lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fathom Zero (Post 695156)
KNIVES.

:lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov
The LOL emoticon gets thrown around this place for a lot less I tell you what.

:(

Esuohlim Aug 14th, 2010 02:43 PM

Dude, Choj, are you going to become one of those guys who becomes so obsessed with weightlifting and exercise that they end up building 300 pounds of muscle and as a result look much stupider than they did back when they were fat?

Tanuki Aug 14th, 2010 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 695174)
Dude, Choj, are you going to become one of those guys who becomes so obsessed with weightlifting and exercise that they end up building 300 pounds of muscle and as a result look much stupider than they did back when they were fat?

Aaaahhh...
dude, that made me imagine the guy with the giant arms he got from steroid usage. It was on that special "The man whose arms exploded."

Well, Choj won't become that guy, so yay.

Kitsa Aug 14th, 2010 03:05 PM

I went to a shitty fair today and couldn't figure out for a moment why I kept thinking of Darkvare.



I also saw this.


10,000 Volt Ghost Aug 14th, 2010 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chojin (Post 695160)
you can't ever break eye contact with it because it lights up as you go through your range of motion and honks AFFLACKS disapprovingly at you if you spend _less_ than 2 seconds moving in either direction.

Fixed.

Also, when you work out do you listen to Randy Orton's theme song?

Esuohlim Aug 15th, 2010 02:48 AM

Man, by the end of the movie Benjamin Button looked like me >:


Zhukov Aug 15th, 2010 05:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa (Post 695178)
I went to a shitty fair today and couldn't figure out for a moment why I kept thinking of Darkvare.



I also saw this.


Love that last photo.

I also love shitty fetés and rubbish "theme parks". Places where you trudge through a muddy field for five minutes to pay $15 to get a glimpse of an oversized paper maché strawberry, (a local favourite). Or a mysterious, cloth covered doorway I saw in Scotland, advertised as "Scotland-land" and only cost ten P to walk through... the other side being Scotland. I've been to a local zoo full of all manner of bizzare and exotic animals, with favourites including sheep and a very slender german shephard chained up in the carpark.

If you like that sort of stuff (which I think you do), then you'd enjoy the book Bollocks to Alton Towers, which is a collection of such places in the UK

Chojin Aug 15th, 2010 06:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esuohlim (Post 695174)
Dude, Choj, are you going to become one of those guys who becomes so obsessed with weightlifting and exercise that they end up building 300 pounds of muscle and as a result look much stupider than they did back when they were fat?

no. i'm pretty close to my goals as aesthetics are concerned. i'd rather be 180 lbs than 250 pounds for a variety of reasons, one of which is that most actual weightclasses are in the former range.

Quote:

Also, when you work out do you listen to Randy Orton's theme song?
i usually listen to it before i lift to put me in the mood to wreck some shit. while i'm lifting i listen to pandora radio on a station patterned after metallica.

Fathom Zero Aug 15th, 2010 02:03 PM

So I just found out after trawling through Wikipedia that there's gonna be a film adaptation of The Yiddish Policeman's Union by the Coen Brothers. I'm a happy camper.

Kitsa Aug 15th, 2010 04:21 PM

I was working outside all day and it was a very humid 90 degrees. I feel like I've been steam-cooked.

MLE Aug 16th, 2010 12:20 AM

Tonight, I decided that I'm going to get my hair shaved into a mohawk within the month.

Chojin Aug 16th, 2010 01:24 AM

that should bring all the girls to the yard.

Chojin Aug 16th, 2010 02:31 AM

today's carb load:

1 box of kix
1/2 bag of pretzels
1 bag of chips
1 bag of goldfish
4 bagels
1 tub of fat free cream cheese
1 box of instant potatoes
1 cup of instant macaroni
1 bowl of plain steel-cut oats

6422 kcal | 108g fat | 1194g carb | 181g protein
100g fiber | 101g sugar

my goal for these days is 5900kcal | 62g fat | 1187 carb | 158 protein, but i'm finding it nearly impossible to get that many carbs without getting fat and protein in the process.

Chojin Aug 16th, 2010 03:21 AM

also, my face when i put a cup of instant macaroni into the microwave but forgot to add water, and then checked on it 3 minutes later to find a pile of black ash on the tray:


Guitar Woman Aug 16th, 2010 03:34 AM

Holy shit, how bout that Summer Slam?

Fathom Zero Aug 16th, 2010 07:27 AM

I know you're dumb as...
I know you're dumb as...
I know you're dumb as paint...

I know you're dumb as...
I know you're dumb as...
I know you're dumb as paint...

Chojin Aug 16th, 2010 07:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guitar Woman (Post 695307)
Holy shit, how bout that Summer Slam?

it had a lot of potential, and then the two main events ended with suckdickery

MarioRPG Aug 16th, 2010 02:31 PM

After reading what Chojin eats... I feel like I eat the worst crap.


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:34 AM.

Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.