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Originally Posted by Mockery
ROLL-UP TOBOGGAN 4 LYFE YO. 
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Totally, whenever I am getting embarrassingly aroused by the local snow bunnies in their figure higging burkas, my shit plastic sled can be a godsend! It never fails to slide off to the side wilderness and crash into a snowbank, effectively sending cakes of snow into my coveralls and mercily cooling my white hot loins.
Then I can focus to impress the hotties when my snow-packed manhood is at rest, and hop onto my flexible flyer, slide down the hill at warp-speed, and demolish a few pedestrians into bits with its terrific steering! When the fire tracks go out, I get to see them fleeing in terror as I walk back up the hill.