What could ANYBODY possibly give me that I do not have already. I receive a package from one lovely lady that seems to take up the challenge. Lo, young dame, what have you?
A mirror? A wand? Surely there is magic involved. I look in the mirror: eww. Surely the wand shall come in handy.
"Magic wand, in my hand: Give me the finest bitches in all the land!"
It worked! And I also got a tiera, so I can make myself a pretty pretty princess! Thank you, Glowbelly, for the best internet Christmas EVER.
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I tried to take a picture of the badass Green Fairy holiday card she included, and the snowflakes she crafted out of the nativity narrative of the Bible, but they didn't turn out well. A Green Fairy is perfect in every way.