[mburbank]

A.) "you need to do something about your legs. Your thighs are like marshmallows and your calves are like toothpicks sticking out of them. "

Calves, schmaves. IT'S THE HEAD. OAO has the head of a self important Doofus, and like the chains Jacob Marley wears, it's eaxactly what he's crafted. He needs to make fundemental chnages to who he is as a person if he wants his head to look like it belongs on anything other than a pale, gangly toothpick, or a soft, slug colored mass. Not that I'm saying body builders heads are anything to write home about, body building being the sport of narcissits and obsessive compulsives, but this combo platter (and again, I feel I must refer to Carrot Top version 2.0) is disturbing and nauseating.

B.) The tree problem is a Koan. Koan's are not meant to be 'solved'. They are meant to be contemplated. The poser of the question knew full well that sound can be thought of in two distinct , equally correct in in the case of the Koan, mutually exclussive ways. Hold the paradox in your mind. Try to see both possabilities simultaneously. Empty you mind of all else. It is the exact antithesis of all this noisy, futile, adolescent I-Can-Understand-More-difficult-philosiphers-than-you-can bullshit.

C.) 'Kant is wrong'. Gosh. What a shame you weren;t there to work with him, maybe he'd have made an even more significant contribution to Western society, or perhaps just gotten out of the way for the greatnes which is you. You really seriously think that you fully comprehend Kant and that you not only stand on the playing field but surpass it? You're like some bogus new age seeker/tourist spending a weeken at an ashram spending a half day pretending to contemplate trees falling when really all your thinking about is how uncomfortable it is too sit on a wooden floor for so long and then getting the idea it's a paradox and rushing off to tell the teacher you're enlightened. You are a chicken scratching the surface of things peope have dedicated their entire lives to. Stop crowing like a damn rooster. One of your teachers needs to smack you with a two by four so in that instant of surprise and pain you'll actually know where you are for a little while.