Freak out and tell them their feud is tearing you apart (shirt ripping off is a plus, as well). Then go into a drunken song number of "Why can't we be friends." The tension will be gone between them, but only because neither of them will hang out with you again
How about talking to your friend online? Friendships can be carried on without physical contact, but lovey type stuff really needs touch and sight.
Good luck, go with what you feel is right, and hope you get ome better advice