[Marc Summers]

When I worked at the supermarket night shift, there was this one guy who had over 60% of his body tattoed, and had piercings in plenty of places. One day, during break, he unzipped his pants, and took out his wang. There were little ball thingies in it. "Check it out guys! Real porcelain!" he says, as he smacks it against a post to demonstrate. His face turns a ghastly white as we all hear several sickening cracks and crunches. He didn't show up to work the next day or two.