[JediScum]

Thanksgiving (the Pariah holiday of the 21st Century)

Thanksgiving was something I never thought about until I met a guy at coffee shop, who was Native American. He didn't seem too pleased with the concept. His disdain resonated a bit as I'm supposed to be part Native Amercian. What tribe, I don't know.

So we give Thanks that we destroyed a culture and took over their land, celebrating it through the form of gluttony, watching televised football (not rugby, not soccer, FOOTBALL) and parades that only contribute to the massive amounts of pollution we already have. We do this, preparing meals 2-3 days or more, in advance, for friends and relatives that we really cannot tolerate for more than ten minutes at a time.

Please bow your head for Grace... Uncle Bill, will you do the honors?

Thanks for the wild turkey and
the passenger pigeons, destined
to be shit out through wholesome
American guts.

Thanks for a continent to despoil
and poison.

Thanks for Indians to provide a
modicum of challenge and
danger.

Thanks for vast herds of bison to
kill and skin leaving the
carcasses to rot.

Thanks for bounties on wolves
and coyotes.

Thanks for the American dream,
To vulgarize and to falsify until
the bare lies shine through.

Thanks for the KKK.
For ******-killin' lawmen,
feelin' their notches.

For decent church-goin' women,
with their mean, pinched, bitter,
evil faces.

Thanks for "Kill a Queer for
Christ" stickers.

Thanks for laboratory AIDS.

Thanks for Prohibition and the
war against drugs.

Thanks for a country where
nobody's allowed to mind the
own business.

Thanks for a nation of finks.

Yes, thanks for all the
memories-- all right let's see
your arms!

You always were a headache and
you always were a bore.

Thanks for the last and greatest
betrayal of the last and greatest
of human dreams.

Amen.