[Fathom Zero]

This probably doesn't pertain to any of you, but...

My little brother stole my parents' sex book and used it in the bathroom. On top of that, he didn't put it back and my stepmother found it. Moreover, they accused me and he played coy about the whole fucking thing. They said they were going to cancel Christmas. So I admitted it. After two days, at any rate. I have no doubt that he would've broken down after a while. But it was just the look on my smallest brother's face. I'm going to kill my bro. Anyway, I won't be able to prove it was him without admitting it was me. I went against my principles and did it anyway. Fuck him. I'll get them proof.

Also, mid-week bonus: My stepmother said I had a small penis and didn't know how to use it.

Anyway, he's an annoying bastard and sounded a lot like your roommate.