Once, when I was drunk (it's always a much gooder idea when you're drunk) I accidentally knocked over one of my piss-filled bottles and spilled pee over some of my work. It's a good thing it was garbage I just hadn't gotten around to throwing away.
When time, I was really drunk and lying on my couch, and I really had to throw up but I was too lazy to actually get up and go to the toilet, so I tried throwing up in an nearby empty box of Little Debbie Swiss cake rolls (lol). Needless to say, it didn't all fit. I got vomit all over my area rug, and it was the grossest vomit ever too. I threw away the rug instead of even attempting to clean it up. I have no regrets.
I'm dirtier than all of you.
