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Creepy Old Fart
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Illinois
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Oct 9th, 2008, 08:39 PM
I used to eat brown sugar out of the bag when i was 9 or 10...
Once i taped a GI Joe figure to the spindle of the washing machine, and set the machine for "spin" just so i could watch it... BUT THE MACHINE HAD NO CLOTHES IN IT!!!!
Another time when I was about 10, I watched porn and got a hard-on...
For several years as a youngster, i would actually drink alcohol but, NOT LIKE IT!!!
Then there was the time i tried to do a ritual that would turn me into a werewolf, but i couldn't find the right ingredients... it called for an ointment made of "herbs", so i used everything i could find in my mom's spice rack.... not a lot, just a little of each. Oh, and the ointment was supposed to have a base of "Baby fat" but, all i could find was Bacon Grease that my mom saved.
Let me tell you, as a cook, bacon grease will do a HELL a bit more than baby fat. How many recipes for a vinegarette call for "baby fat"? Fucking NONE!
With Bacon grease, and not a lot, i can make a spinach salad you won't believe.
But, yeah, the lycanthropy didn't take because i chickened out at the last minute and never did the ritual.
I mean, shit, what if it worked?!?! Then i'd have to go kill to eat 3 days a month? Not interested.
Oh, and i used to pick my nose.
And eat it.
Actually, i shouldn't say i "used" to.....
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