[Fathom Zero]

I'll try this.

Originally Posted by glowbelly

1. you decide to change jobs. do you tell me?
That really isn't something I could try to do, much less actually pull off. I'd think I'd let you know if I had misgivings about my current job and was looking for another one.

2. do you talk to my friends about what boobs look like in california?
Yes I would. If we were in a boob-talking-about conversation and you're cool with that.

3. a woman calls you and i ask who it is. do you tell me it's your boss pretending to be a girl?
I'd tell you exactly who it is, unless I'd happen to be cheating on you. Actually, I'd probably be embarassed about having another girl call me and even if it was something insignificant, I'd make myself look very incriminating.

4. after having sex you tell me you're sorry. why?
I felt that fucked up at something or I thought about something weird.

5. would you ever tell my best friend that you raced to new york city after 911 and rescued a dog from the rubble?
No. That's dumb.

6. would you hide porn from me? even if it was really bad porn?
Hiding it is half the fun, no?

7. quick we're out of milk and money doesn't come in until friday what to do?
Easy. Sell plasma. I'm not joking.

8. if i asked you how much your snap on account was up to would you lie and tell me $500 or tell the truth and say $5000?
I'd lie through my teeth and work like hell to right it. If I'm unable to, I'll own up to it.

9. we can't pay rent this month. do you promise to take care of everything and tell me not to worry or do you let me fucking handle it?
I'll let you handle it if I can't. The last thing I want is for you to be pissed more than you already are.

10. how many cigarettes would you go outside to smoke if i was in labor at the hospital giving birth to your child?
I'd go through every pack I happened to have and bum off of other people.

11. do you own any books that don't have to do with getting rich quick?
Assloads.

12. have you read them?
Yeah. Books as decorations are really gay and so are the people that have them.

13. did you really go to college?
Nope. Not yet.

14. when i'm about to walk into a room filled with your family will you tell me "don't say anything about anything" while expecting me to know what the hell you're talking about?
If we had a very long conversation about "anything" right before we got into the room, then yes. Otherwise, I couldn't.

15. do you talk in cliches?
Of course, baby.