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Guitar Woman Guitar Woman is offline
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Old Dec 23rd, 2012, 12:21 AM       
Hey shitlords, guess what shouldn't get the ability to spam instant kill attacks with a 50/50 success rate? The final boss with over 6 million hitpoints, in the game where you lose if your party leader dies! FUCK!

Fuck you Final Fantasy 13. Fuck you too SquareEnix. I have diligently sat through your aggressively horrible game design and fucking acrobatically insane plot for 60 hours, and this is how you end things? By shitting on my face and calling me a whore when I restart your retarded boss for the 5 billionth time because the RNG decided to be a cunt again?

I am legitimately fucking angry at this game now. You people who played for 5 hours and quit to complain about corridor hiking, you have no idea how fucking bad FF13 actually is. Example-wise, did you know this game somehow manages to have an objectively worse villain than FF8 did? If bran flakes were personified, they would literally be Barthandelus! Plot cohesion? What the fuck is that? We at SquareEnix have resolved to break our own plot's internal logic at least two times a cutscene! Character development? That means we spontaneously change everyone's personalities and motivations when it's convenient for the plot, right? You want sidequests? In an RPG? Well, ok, here: just do this same one over and over again about 70 fucking times, that oughtta be fine.

There is no excuse for this kind of incompetence from a multi-million dollar production. What the fuck did they even spend all that money on? Because it sure as shit wasn't non-mongoloid script writers or actual level designers!

The real tragedy here is that it could have been great. I have no fucking idea how SE managed to take what should have been a relatively simple, visceral story about freedom and choice and turn it into... that, I guess they just have an unparalleled ability to make everything they touch turn to absolute shit.

Seriously. FUCK.

Last edited by Guitar Woman : Dec 23rd, 2012 at 01:15 AM.
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