UGH!
Ok, so I have received my Christmas present from Emily! Thanks a bunch MLE, you really did seem to get me stuff that I would like.
I guess we're posting pictures of the box, so, this is the box that MLE sent me. As you can see it it quite large, which suggests that there is a lot inside - don't be instantly fooled into thinking this is a GOOD thing though, since wads of money and keys to expensive cars don't come in large boxes. Still, it is a good size box and I'd probably use it again if I didn't already have too many boxes. Also, MLE, nice work putting my first name in the section where my last name is supposed to go on the customs declaration. Bless.
So I'll just say right up that there aren't going to be any goofy or wacky antics going on. I've got a headache and I don't know how to edit youtube videos and I'm in my pyjamas now anyway. This isn't to say that I am not very happy indeed to have received this gift. I'll use extra exclamation marks if that helps!! The first thing you are meant to notice in a present is the card/letter, and I don't know if this was on top or not, but I'll put it first.
You may have noticed that along with the garish and often OUT OF THE LINES colouring (which did make me smile!!), there are some of what appears to be crumbs covering the letter... well, that's probably because of these things...
The lid that was holding them in came undone, so that created about two metric cups of crumbs to cover everything. No matter.
Let me just say that they are WAY tastier than they look. These things are serious food, and while you may need sprinkles or icing to tell you how good something is, MLE and I just need the bare bones flavour, thanks. MMMM. They tasted like burnt sugar. Yum. I say tasted because I ate them all pretty quickly, even though there were about fifty of them.
Next up was what I am going to say is a keytag. If it's some other form of jewelery then I'll stand corrected, but for now it's a keytag. It came in a god damn box, and I'm going to guess that it's been HAND CRAFTED by MLE, which is more than any of you other fuckers bothered with. Uh, if it's NOT actually hand crafted then it's still pretty good, haha. !!!! Whatever, I think it's cool.
God knows what Hefeweizen is. Oh it's beer. Alright next item.
MLE warned me in her letter that these will probably taste bad, and I being stupid figured that they must be like Fisherman's Friend mints, in that they are really, really strong and taste like mustard. Well, no. I flipped the tin over, brushed off the crumbs and checked the ingredients... DEXTROSE, MALTODEXTRIN, MAGNESIUM, TITANIUM DIOXIDE, all pretty harmless stuff so far, STEARATE, SODIUM FLUORIDE, ARTIFICIAL MEAT FLAVOUR, wait what? Meat flavour? Haha, this must be some kind of joke? Well, no. I opened the lid and sniffed it, and that's as far as I am going. Sorry. It made me cough. Fuck off. Maybe later if anyone asks me too.
Ok, next is a lovingly strung pile of books. This reminded me of how Donald Duck used to carry his books... I tried googling "DONALD DUCK CARRYING BOOKS TIED UP OR SOMETHING" but whatever.
I'm really glad that I got some books, Stranger in a Strange Land and Starship Troopers are two really great books that I don't actually own. Nice work.
All in all, a good haul. Your biscuit things are ace, thanks. Pretty pleased with it all, and I hope you have a great Christmas. Cheers!!!!!!!!!!.
THE END.