View Single Post
  #269  
george george is offline
i will let you down
george's Avatar
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: MARYLAND
Old Jul 16th, 2011, 12:49 AM       
i have never been in trouble for anything i have done wrong. i am one of those people that justice just seems to overlook. or i just have good luck with cops.

once i got pulled over by a cop. i knew i was in troublle and that the car was going to get impounded. i had made the registration stickers using photo shop and a little experience from my sign shop days. my registration card was counterfeit as well. and as the cop walked up to my car i spotted a half ounce of weed in the door handle. Nancy had bought it ealier (i guess) and forgot about it.

trying not to panic, i slowly take the weed out of the doorhandle and then deposit it in a McDonalds drink cup that had been living life in my cupholder as an ash tray. the lid was barely on, i slipped the weed in and snapped the top on. when the cop got to my window i took a big sip from the straw.

the whole thing took about two hours because they really wanted to know where the stickers came from. they were very impressed with my forgery. i gave the only answer anyone should give a cop "i don't know." eventually the cop gave us a ride home. turns out he had been staioned on a base with me in the Marines. he shook my hand when he dropped us off.

i just shook my head and clutched my cup of cigarette water and weed and wondered at the miracle of it all as he drove off.

so on the night of the Christmas party, as i stood in front of a cop, and tried not to stare at the walls melting as five tabs started to peak i began to wonder if i had used all my cop luck up in that one incident. i was pretty sure i was going to have to attempt to knock this motherfucker out.

i had planned to be safely in my hotel room listening to music and tripping balls and in general having a great time. instead i had to go find Adam. Adam was not supposed to be given any paper, he had never done any drugs and i had made it clear that i did not want him to start when i was around. so when our hippie pal Monkey Boy gave him a freebie out of a small messenger bag filled with more sheets of paper that i had ever seen it was done with a great deal of promises of people babysitting Adam.

the babysitters failed at their task almost immediately, and about twenty minutes after Adam took paper the phone rang. it was Adam. he was in the lobby, and yelling into the hotel phone about how he was tripping balls and starting to freak out.

somone had to go get him, and somehow i got elected. a guy named mike agreed to come with me. we got to the lobby. the kid was gone. a few minutes of cell phone calls between people out of their gourds established that Adam had made it back to the room.

Mike and i got off the elevator on the third floor there was like ten dudes fighting. mike and i eased our way around the fight. this was just too much, i was so happy to be back at the room. george was almost out of contact for awhile. just as i was about to turn the corner and go down the short hallway to my room, a voice that could only belong to a cop shouted, "where do you think you're going?"

one of the cops working hotel security (the christmas party the year before there had been massive damage and disturbance at this hotel, and there was A LOT of security this year) had spotted us as they arrived to break up the big fight. he wanted to fuck with us a little. we went around the corner and tried to get in the room. he came around the corner just as we were knocking to be let in.

"Just going to our room," i said as he caught up to us, "is there a problem?" i asked it with what I thought just the right amount of I AM A VERY SERIOUS ADULT, DONT FUCK WITH ME. I knocked again. and no one answered.

"Really?" officer friendly asked with a little bit of sarcastic interest in his voice. "how come no ones answering?"

as if on cue the door flew open, Monkey Boy looked out. then slammed the door and locked the bolt lock thing that is on hotel doors. the cop and i stared at each other. we were both very suprised. a few moments passed, and the sound of breaking glass seemed to come from far away.

there was a life sentence in prison waiting for me and everyone in that room if the cop came in. i was tripping hard. mike was tripping hard. the cop stared alternately at me and the door. i was not letting him go in that room no matter what.

the cop stood there looking scary and very thoughtful. finally he shook his head. "Go into your room, and if i see you again i am arresting you and everyone in the room. disappear."

and we did.

Monkey Boy had jumped right out of a third story window. Adam went home and told his Mom everything. She told DSpring's Mom. Adam and DSprings got sent off to a mental hospital (very overprotective parents, i dont blame them for being worried or mad, but a mental hospital?) DSprings is still having issues with all the Meds they put him on there. the rest of that night about a million mother fuckers came to our room to try and buy paper cause Adam had told everyone at the party we were tripping. everyone knew.

we got an instant bad reputation. wich was fine. the party was over for now. i bought a cat and named him Mr. Orange. I sat alone in my apartment at night and talked to the cat.
__________________
tax collectors, fishermen and whores, baby.
i am super humble, and better than bacon
doctorboogie fanclub member #1
@jorgedomingo on twitter.
Reply With Quote