OK, I finally got things ready to go (Sorry for it taking 3 days)
Here's how it all went down...
I was having a normal day when I suddenly noticed I received a package in the mail. "Zounds!" I said, because I apparently talk like that now.
"A package from Australia! I hope it is boomerangs and didgeridoos! I loves me some didgeridoos!" Then I realized it must be from my Secret Santa.
The first thing I discovered is the Australian PS does not tag spoilers.
So according to this book that I think BatmanJohnson wrote (his name is on it after all) I should wear festive livery while opening yuletide packages!
Now we're cooking with oil! Time to open this box!
Ah a card from Zhukov (that solves the mystery of my Secret Santa) with Australian animals on it. This shows promise, until I receive some startling news....
Christmas has been canceled!!! Bummer. But I did get permission to celebrate May Day early. So I have that going for me, which is nice.
A Mario hat! Now I too can look like my favorite plumber! I donned the hat and jumped triumphantly into the air but...
I hit my head on the ceiling and knocked myself silly(er) Those hats need to come with warning labels.
AH-HA! It takes more than a hat to be like Mario, it takes his paunch too, which must be why Zhukov sent me this delicious assortment of candy cookies and chocolate! I proceeded to devour the entire thing but...
I forgot eating too much candy can cause you stomach cramps.
No time for that, I had a package of Ghostbusters collectible cards with bubblegum to open. That will make me feel better. Well it would have except....
I chewed the gum
Literature! This will keep me from giving myself stomach cramps and massive head trauma! At last things were going my way. Not only was this a macho graphic novel filled with pictures that someone like me who can't read well can enjoy, but it is guaranteed to not lead to any injury!
Hand made hand painted Tasmanian soldiers. We all know how rough and tumble the Australian military is.
A manly gift if ever there was one. Maybe too manly though because....
They beat the piss out of me and stole my macho graphic novel!
Thanks for the great stuff Zhukov! Merry May Day!