[J. Tithonus Pednaud]

I once went to a strip club on the Quebec border that served food.

The place had stained green and yellow shag carpeting everywhere including the top of the bar. Our waitress served us with a cigarette with three inches of ash hanging from her lip and an old trachea scar across her neck. Right after dropping off our order she shambled onto the makeshift stage - really just a step up (also covered in shag) - where she actually fed a quarter into the jukebox set up there and stated 'dancing'.

My carny buddies and I bailed shortly after she revealed fresh caesarean scars.