I usually tell people that I gave their dad herpes... That usually scares them away.. And if not, I ask them "does that make your pee pee tingle?" And then I go into a rant about my frozen coathanger aborted fetii that I have in my deep freeze... I tell them... I rub them and pray...
Usually they just look at me funny... But sometimes... I get a reaction... Oh it's lovely.
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