I have made a decision

[mburbank]

Telemarketing is criminally stupid, frowny emoticon.

Be a dominatrix. You have a good look for it, and if you only take clients who are into humiliation, you don't even have to touch anything nasty or be touched by it.

If I had any good advice I'd have given it to you by now.

The only thing I know anything about is Museum work. Visitor services in larger museums almost always has openings, because it's awful and pays poorly. The thing is, though, it's a good way to get ones foot in the door as far as other jobs at said museum go. If you tell me what Museums yoiu are near, I would happily find out if I can stir up any contacts.