I want an EcoSphere

[McClain]

DO NOT shake it, drop it, or otherwise treat EcoSphere roughly - it is someone's home.
DO NOT overexpose your EcoSphere to light.
HEY! I SAID DO NOT shake your EcoSphere!
DO NOT lube your EcoSphere with sexual jelly and insert EcoSphere in your buttox.
DO NOT cry to EcoSphere about how you have no friends and this world of micro organisms is the only thing to touch your penis in the past 3 years.
DO NOT show EcoSphere pictures of your Jewish internet friends.
DO NOT allow EcoSphere to roll in to the kitchen for a late-night snack.
DO NOT let EcoSphere coerce you in to going to the mall for some "DDR fun."
DO NOT put a wig on your EcoSphere and place it on the back of a donkey.
DO NOT confuse your EcoSphere for a shot glass of Congnac.
DO NOT take your EcoSphere to Red Lobster.
DO NOT rest your EcoSphere in kitty litter.
DO NOT let any of these warnings keep you from purchasing the EcoSphere.